~Peeta~

The dark void of depression over my future began to swallow me again as I watched Katniss leave, ignoring my pleas for her to wait and let me explain.

I looked helplessly at Madge, the tears threatening to fall.

"I'm so sorry, Peeta," she whispered, looking away.

"Sorry?" Mother snapped. "He is the one who should be sorry! He just slept with some dirty, lower-class whore when he is engaged to you!"

My hands clenched into fists at hearing Mother call Katniss that. "She is not a whore, Mother!" I screamed, making Mother jump back in surprise. "I love her!"

Mother scoffed. "You do not. You just had some masculine needs and found some whore who would attend to them for you."

It took all of my self-control not to hit her.

"Ugh…even this room smells of sex." She waved her hand before her nose. "Who knows how many men that wretched girl has been with."

I was about to lash out when I felt strong hands on my biceps, pulling me back. I whipped around, intending to direct my fury against the person holding me back, but saw that it was Haymitch.

"What's going on in here?" he asked, as he took in my near nakedness, the messy bed, and Mother's anger.

"What are you doing here?" Mother demanded. "No one invited you in!"

"I heard shouting, and thought I better make sure everything was alright," he replied casually.

"We don't need your help," Mother hissed.

Haymitch ignored her and directed his attention to me. "What's going on, kid?"

I looked at him helplessly, feeling my hopelessness overcoming my fury at Mother.

"That is none of your business!" Mother cried, stepping between us.

"Would you just calm down and let me talk to the boy? Seems like he needs a man to talk to since he has no others in his life!" Haymitch hollered.

They continued bickering back-and-forth as I drifted back to the bed and sat down heavily, putting my head in my hands. What had I done? I couldn't bear the thought of not seeing Katniss again. I felt a lump form in my throat.

Suddenly, the bickering stopped and I realized I was alone with Haymitch. He plopped down on the bed next to me and offered me his flask. I took it without hesitating and took several gulps. I felt my mouth twist at the vile taste, but the numbing effect was welcome.

"What happened?" Haymitch asked, taking the flask back.

I sighed, pushing back the urge to cry. "I lost her, Haymitch. I really lost her."

"How do you know that?"

I explained to him how we were – you know – and Mother walked in on us, announcing that Madge was my fiancée, and how Katniss had slapped me and left, screaming that she didn't want me to talk to her ever again. I let out a shaky breath when I finished.

Haymitch's brow furrowed. He didn't say anything for a long time. Just when I didn't think I could take the silence anymore he began, "I never planned on telling you this, but I think you ought to know." He paused and took a breath. "I've known Katniss's family for a long time – or did."

I looked at him in surprise. "What?"

"I knew her parents. Grew up with them actually. Katniss's father was a great man. It nearly killed me when I found out he had died." He took another swig. "I was in charge of the mine he worked in. He always worked hard and was cheerful about it too. He was truly a leader down in those mines. Everyone respected him. So when he got sick, it really affected the amount of coal we mined.

"I found out later that he had gotten the sickness from working in the mine. My mine. Apparently there was some health protocol that I missed. So I was responsible. And not only did the sickness take him, but it took the rest of her family, and Gale' father too. Those two were left with nothing, and I watched from afar as they struggled to work things out and keep each other going."

He took another swig as I continued to stare at him, listening intently.

"I felt so guilty, especially when Katniss's sister died too, that I found out where Gale worked and started paying his boss more money to give to Gale. I knew they would never accept charity, knowingly at least, they're too proud for that.

"When I found out about the Titanic, I decided I should buy my way onto it. Start fresh in the States. Then I thought, they could do that too. I told his boss to tell him about the Titanic and heard that he was so enthused, I knew I had to help. I paid his boss even more money so that Gale could purchase the tickets. And he did. And now here we are."

I let everything that he had just told me sink in for a moment then said, "So Katniss doesn't know who you are?"

Haymitch shook his head. "Nope."

"But that's why you helped me make those plans for her. Because you want her to be happy."

He nodded. "After everything she's been through, she deserves someone like you in her life."

"And now I've ruined it." I put my head in my hands miserably.

"Don't give up, kid. That girl has been through hell and worse. She's had everyone she cares about ripped away from her. And when she finally opened up to you, this happened. You just have to explain yourself to her. Let her know she hasn't lost you."

I scoffed. "But how do I do that when she doesn't want me to talk to her?"

"Make her listen! Convince her that you love her, and want to be with her."

I sighed loudly and put my head in my hands again.

"Look kid, I've done too much for this girl to let you give up so easily. You better find her or I'll kick your ass."

I chuckled despite myself. But then I remembered something…Mother.

Haymitch noticed my face fall and the realization dawned on him too. "Right…your Mother."

I nodded miserably. "How do I get away from her?"

Haymitch was silent for a moment. "Forget her. You need to be happy, and Katniss needs to be happy. That isn't going to happen if you let your Mother control everything you do."

"But how do I get her to understand that she can't control me?"

"By not letting her! And by telling her that she can't! Wouldn't you do anything for Katniss?"

I nodded earnestly.

"Then do this for her."

"But Mother just…she just knows how to control me," I protested.

"How does she control you?" Haymitch asked, locking eyes with me.

"She – she uses my father against me," I sighed, looking away from Haymitch's piercing eyes. "She says that I can make the Mellark name well known and respected. That Father would want that."

Haymitch looked at me a moment then responded, "You were close to your Father, huh?"

"Yes. I miss him so much."

Haymitch put his hand on my shoulder, forcing me to look at him. "If your father is anything like you, then I can promise you that what your mother is doing to you would not make him happy."

I was silent for a moment as I considered this. Would Father really be that concerned with his family name being in the upper-class realms of the business world? Or would he want me to be happy?

I knew the answer. And I cursed myself for not realizing it before. Of course Father would want me to be happy. He would want me to make a name for myself doing something I loved with someone I loved. I could still make the Mellark name known and respected, but in a different way than Mother wanted. That's what Father would want for me. What he would want for all of us.

Haymitch must have seen my eyes light up as I realized all of this. He smiled gently at me.

"Go find your girl," he said as he took another swig from his flask and stood up, stretching. "My work here is done."

I chuckled as I stood up to finish getting dressed and Haymitch made his way toward the door.

"Hey." He turned to me as he opened the door. I stopped buttoning my shirt and looked up at him expectantly. "Get the maids to change the sheets. It smells like sex in here."

I blushed furiously as I hollered at him to get out. He left, closing the door behind him. I could hear him snickering at himself the whole way. I shook my head.

After I had finished dressing, I opened the door and walked into the parlor. I strode toward the door to the suite until I was stopped by a voice behind me.

"And where do you think you are going, Peeta?" Mother hissed.

I took a deep breath before I turned around and replied, "To find Katniss."

Mother laughed condescendingly, as if I had just told a stupid joke. "I don't think so," she said lowly, her eyes locking on me.

I swallowed and said, "You can't control me anymore, Mother."

Mother's eyebrows rose slightly, but she didn't look surprised like I expected.

"I thought you might say that," she replied in a voice that made me nervous. She was clearly expecting this and had a plan.

"You see," she began. "I've known for quite some time about your sneaking around with this Katniss." She said Katniss's name like she was spitting rotten food out of her mouth. She continued, "I was hoping that you would leave the girl before I had to intervene, but clearly you need some guidance."

She took a step towards me and I took a deep breath.

"I have plans for you, Peeta. Great plans. And I would hate for all of my meticulous planning to go to waste. So I've installed some precautions to keep you on the right track."

"What do you mean?" I asked, my voice slightly shaky. I cursed myself for it.

She stepped toward me until she was directly in front of me. She reached out her hand and I flinched instinctively, expecting her to slap me. But instead, she reached behind me and opened the door to our suite.

I spun around to see two crew workers force their way into the suite. I narrowed my eyes in confusion.

"What's going on?" I asked, looking from the crew workers to Mother.

"Well, Peeta, I was going through my clothes the other day and I noticed my bathing suit was missing." Mother paused, as if she were waiting for me to remember.

My eyes widened as I remembered that I had never returned her bathing suit after I had given it to Katniss to wear in the pool. And now that she mentioned it, I realized Katniss hadn't come out of the locker room with it as she was too eager to get away after Haymitch had caught us.

Upon seeing my realization, she continued, "I thought, well where would a bathing suit be used but for the pool? So I asked around until some crew workers informed me of a strange instance."

I gulped.

"They said that they had seen a young man with blonde hair entering the pool alone one day, but that later he had exited with a woman of the lower-class, and they had never seen her enter," Mother stated smugly. "As you know, people of the lower-class are not to be in the pool. So they did an inspection of the locker room to see if anything had been stolen, and they found a bathing suit. They had heard that I was missing one and brought it to me, to see if it was mine. And it was. And I had never worn it."

Her eyes bored into mine. "As I could only deduce that the blonde young man could be you and that the lower-class woman was the whore you've been sneaking around with, I was forced to report that my bathing suit had been stolen. And I have witnesses who will identify the thief."

I drew in a breath. "Mother," I began sharply.

But she cut me off. "Now there is no need to require her arrest…that is, if you choose to forget her and cooperate with me."

She stared at me intensely, and I stared back with equal ferocity. How could she do this to me? Her own son?

"If you really care about this whore, Peeta," Mother warned. "Then I would cooperate if I were you. It would be bad for her to be arrested. Very bad."

I was trapped. What could I do? Of course I could never let Katniss be arrested. She would be treated harshly, being of the lower-class. And she could lose everything. After all that she had been through, I couldn't do that to her.

I sank down onto the sofa as Mother triumphed over me, the crew workers from the pool that day standing behind her as if to reinforce her threat to Katniss.

"Now forget about this whore," Mother stated. "You're marrying Madge, and nothing you do will change that."

~Katniss~

APRIL 14, 1912

I must have been standing by the railing at the stern of the ship for most of the night by now. The air was freezing but my anger kept my blood hot. Eventually, however, that anger

began to give way to the deep sadness and betrayal I was feeling.

How had I been so stupid? Why had I allowed myself to be so open with an upper class man? Of course, all he wanted was to fulfill his needs.

But Peeta is different, a small voice at the back of my mind said. I felt tears leak out of my eyes. I really thought I felt something for him, I thought we had a connection. I had never felt that with anyone before…and now it just turned out to be a lie. It was all a lie.

I eventually began to think about Gale. He had been betrayed too. Madge was engaged to Peeta and was misleading Gale. And I knew Gale. He was like me. He didn't just give his heart away like that. He must have really felt something for her too. I wonder if he knew that our rich blondes were engaged to each other. I began to feel sick again.

I stayed at the stern until the first streaks of dawn began to appear on the horizon. The sun making its way out of the deep, black waters. It occurred to me that the last time I had seen the sun I was about to give myself to Peeta. I cringed, feeling dirty again. I shifted and felt the soreness between my legs, evidence of our actions. I didn't think I could even call it making love anymore.

As I was just deciding that I should leave, I heard soft footsteps behind me. I whirled around, half-expecting to see Peeta there. But it was worse. It was Madge. The rising sun made her gown shimmer and her hair glow. She looked breathtaking – as much as I loathed to admit it.

I opened my mouth to begin spewing curses and insults at her for betraying Gale the way she had, when she put her hands up defensively.

"Please," she began. "Please, just listen to me."

I could still feel my fury bubbling, but clamped my mouth shut.

She took this as a sign to continue and took a deep breath before she said, "Peeta wasn't lying to you. And I'm not lying to Gale."

I narrowed my eyes at her, indicating that I didn't believe her.

"I guess…I guess in a way Peeta and I are engaged. But not because we want to be. Our parents our forcing it on us. I like Peeta, but I love Gale. And I know Peeta loves you." Her blue eyes that almost matched Peeta's bore into mine. The conviction with which she spoke banished the thought from my mind that she was lying.

"If that's true," I said through gritted teeth. "Then why didn't he tell me?"

She sighed and looked out to the ocean where the sun had revealed more of itself above the ocean waters. "He was scared, Katniss."

"Scared of what?" I asked, incredulous.

"Of losing you."

"Why should he be afraid of losing me?"

"Well, I don't know you very well. But I know that if a man I had fallen in love with told me his parents were forcing him to marry someone else, I might walk away from him."

I considered Madge's words. She was right. I'm sure I would have done the same thing…but probably more angrily than Madge.

"He still should have told me," I mumbled stubbornly.

She bobbed her head. "I agree. But look at it from his perspective. He is completely in love with you. Don't walk away from him. It would ruin him. He's already lost a lot."

I understood the feeling of losing a lot. I thought about a future without Peeta in it, and realized I couldn't imagine it. In everything I pictured, he was there.

"What should I do?" I whispered.

Madge smiled gently at me, the bright hues of the sunrise making her eyes shine. "Go find him."

"But what about his mother?" I asked quietly, as if his mother was listening to our conversation.

Madge's smile fell. "Ugh…that woman." She paused for a moment, thinking. "It might be tricky to search him out. His mother will surely be watching him very closely now. You need to go somewhere only he can find you."

I felt a smile tug at my lips. "I know just the place."

Madge smiled back at me before she turned back to the sunrise.

"So, have you told Gale?" I asked. "About you and Peeta?"

Her eyes fell and she replied, barely above a whisper, "I am going to now."

I nodded. "Good."

"Will…will Gale leave me?" she asked timidly.

I considered a moment. "He might be angry at first. But I don't think he will leave you. Gale can be fiery, like me. But he's logical. He'll listen."

I could visibly see Madge's shoulders droop with relief.

We were silent once more as we gazed out at the sunrise, which was now casting bright colors across the dark waters.

"Well, I should be going," Madge said after several minutes.

I nodded. "Me too."

As she began to walk away, I called after her. "Madge!" She turned back to me. "Thank you," I said genuinely.

She smiled with a warmth that matched the sunrise and said, "Go find Peeta."

Sorry this is kind of a "filler" chapter, but it was necessary. And, anyway, if you've been paying attention to the dates, you know things aren't going to be dull for much longer...