Yippee! I finished this chapter before Monday and I totally didn't think I would be able to! Alrighty so thanks to all of the amazing reviews and for a reviewer has brought to my attention that I have spelling Roger's name wrong *le gasp* So I will now be spelling it correctly! This is one of my favorite scenes to write because of the MAJOR character development going on. Next will be sort of a continuation but I split it up into two chappys to create SUSPENSE! :D

Disclaimer: Do not own ANYTHING except my character and some of the plot!

Elise POV

Seven days have gone by since the death of Arthur the boys have returned to their normal rough housing and games. I have started to laugh again and be happy which brought smiles to Simon's face. Everything was actually going right (well as right as life could be trapped on an island with a bunch of boys). But it was not perfect. After the miraculous full day and night of peaceful sleep with Jack I have not been able to sleep well since. I had begun to form dark circles under my eyes and felt light headed and dizzy most of the time. I felt like something was slowly eating away at me from the inside and that soon all that would be left of me would be my skin.

"El! I have something to show you that I think you will enjoy quite a lot" Simon called his face beaming and eyes sparkling. I smiled and intertwined our hands as we walked into the jungle together.

Simon POV

Your baby blues
so full of wonder

I watched Elise's blue eyes sparkle as they took in the fantastic scene. She skipped around reminding me of our childhood. I watched her and noticed with growing dread that even as she was skipping around happily she wasn't alright. Something was wrong with my darling little sister, something was very wrong indeed. She had dark splotches underneath her eyes and her palms were scored with angry red welts. Her face was drained of color and life and her cheeks were sunken in.

Your curly cues

Her blonde ringlets bounced as she raced around checking out all of the beautiful flowers. Picking them up and smelling them, touching the smooth silkiness of their petals. What could be wrong with my sister? Why had the life faded from her eyes? Why hadn't I seen it before what kind of big brother am I?

Your contagious smile

She smiled a brilliant smile that almost reached her eyes and hugged me. I smiled back and wrapped my arms around her fragile form. At that moment all I wanted to do was never let her go to keep my arms wrapped around her and sheltering her from the world…from any harm.

And as I watch
you start to grow and
all I can do is hold you tight

She pulled back and stared up at me her eyes glistening with tears. Causing me to remember a time when we weren't even seven years old and an older boy on our street had called Elise a stupid little twit. She had run to me and wrapped her short arms around me crying. Immediately I asked her what was wrong and she just looked up at me with those heartbreaking blue eyes full of tears. And at that moment even as a young and naïve seven year old boy I vowed to protect her.

Knowing
clouds will rage and

I jolted back to the clearing as Elise faltered in my arms; teetering like she would be faint. "El!" I cried as she nearly fell over and I quickly set her on the ground. "Are you alright? What happened?" I asked frantically wondering if she had caught some sort of jungle fever.

Storms will race in

"I'm fine Simon I just haven't been sleeping well that's all nothing to worry about" she laughed fussing with my hair.

"El I don't know how to say this because we have never had this problem in the past but are you keeping something from me?" I asked her. She looked at me for a moment her eyes welling up with tears her hands shaking slightly.

But you will be safe
in my arms

"Yes" she whispered her voice catching. I waited for her to elaborate knowing that she needed time to tell me. "I…I haven't been sleeping for a while now".

"How long is a while El?" I asked now worried.

"Since dad's death" she whispered to the ground not looking at me.

Rains will pour down

"That's three years El!" I cried out in anxiety. Elise winced and her lips quivered.

"I…I…" she trailed off still not looking at me. Then all of as sudden she balled her hands into tight fists and whipped her head up to stare at me. Her eyes were dark and stormy and her jaw was set. "It's my fault!" She cried out her body shaking. "It's all my fault dad is dead because of ME" she continued on her voice breaking. "Simon it's my fault! The hospital his death EVERYTHING!" she yelled causing a few birds to flee from the trees.

Waves will crash around

I felt like somebody had punched me in the chest knocked the wind right out of me…because I couldn't breathe. "Simon please…don't hate me I'm sorry…oh god I'm so very sorry" Elise looked at me her eyes full of three years of guilt.

But you will be safe
in my arms

"El…"my voice broke off and I cleared my throat. "El what do you mean it's your fault how?" I asked. She took a deep breath and nodded.

"The night before Dad was murdered I had a dream. I dreamt of someone breaking into our house how they had a gun. They had climbed the stairs holding a large sack and began stuffing our things into the bag. Mom's vase, dad's watch, your radio, my ring from mom. Then he…he dropped the vase and it shattered". I remembered hearing a crash that had awoken me that fateful night. "Dad came out of his bedroom and the man yelled at him; threatened him…threatened us. I got up and saw the man pointing the gun at father and…and I yelled to him". She stopped for a moment trying to compose herself. "When I yelled to him he turned around to look at me and the man shot him. Shot him right in front of me and killed him. I…I ran to father and…."she broke off again sobbing. I wrapped my arms around her trying to soothe her. "Th…The man he…he shot me" she whispered and broke off into wracking sobs. I felt my face burn red; my anger like a bomb destroying all reason within me. Some wanker had shot Elise my sister! Shot a thirteen year old girl and shot my father. I tasted copper on my tongue and realized I had bit the inside of my mouth in my rage.

Story books are full of fairy tales

"I woke up in horrible pain and then I heard the crash. I…I knew that he would shoot father if I went out there and I would be shot too. So I hid…I bloody hid and dad was shot and killed! I could have…I should have done something" she whispered her head falling on my shoulder. I remembered back to that night when I had heard the crash and then father and another man shouting I heard a gunshot. I ran out and saw the man holding the gun. I remember grabbing my golf club and swinging it with all the anguish and strength I had possessed. I remember the horrible sound that the man made before he fell over dropping the gun. I remember blood…lots of blood pouring from the man's head. I remember screaming and crying my mother and Elise and my father his blood mixing into the man's blood. I had killed him.

Of kings and queens and the bluest skies

Elise pulled back and looked at me and I realized that no matter how badly I wish I could tell Elise that I had been the one who killed the man not dad I knew I couldn't.

My heart is torn
just in knowing

Elise looks up at me I am her big brother and I protect her from everything even me. "Well you already hate me so I might as well tell you the rest. That year after the burglary and father's death I was depressed. One of our teachers Miss Kingsley asked me one day what was wrong. And I…I trusted her and she seemed so kind. I told her about my dreams; about everything even you. She must have phoned the hospital because the following week we were being admitted.

You'll someday see
the truth from lies

I told… it's my fault we went to that place it's my fault that father is dead…I'm a monster" Elise cried. I felt numb as I remembered that teacher and that day when they had came for us. I looked down at Elise who was crying into her hands looking like a broken angel.

Castles they might crumble
dreams may not come true

"I could never hate you Elizabeth I love you I just hope that you don't hate me" I told her lifting her chin so she could see the sincerity in my eyes.

But you are never all alone

"Why would I ever hate you?" she asked her eyes full of confusion.

Because I will always

"Because I have been a horrible big brother. I have let you feel this guilt for years causing you to become physically sick. I should have been there for you I should have seen your pain. Please forgive me El?"

Always love you

Elise wrapped her arms around me our tears running together as we cried. "Always" she whispered in my ear and I held her tighter feeling a sense that if I didn't hold on tight enough to my sister that she would be ripped from my arms.

When the
clouds will rage and
storms will race in

After Elise and I had sat and cried finally mourning our father and letting go of some of our pain. It had started to rain. The thunder roared and the lightning lit up the darkening sky. "El we have to find shelter" I told Elise are arms locked together as we ran from our haven.

But you will be safe
in my arms

"Over there!" Elise shouted pointing out a cave almost hidden entirely by lichen. Hopefully there Elise and I could be safe…

Rains will pour down
waves will crash around
but you will be safe
in my arms

In my arms

*Tear* D: So sad I almost cried while writing this. So I really hope that you all enjoyed it! The next chappy will be the continuation of what's happening in the cave… Ooooh mystery!

YOU all ROCK my fuzzy socks!

LiveLoveWrite-93