Author's Note-Hi! Um...what else am I supposed to say? I am dearly sorry that I have not had the chance to update for the past...week or so, was it? Anyways, I'm trying to make this chapter long to make up for lack of updates, but it's hard! Oh, and check out my other stories please!

Disclaimer: Disclaimers are stupid, but I have to say that I do not own Twilight...yada yada yada...

Prank #11

Alice's POV

I lay on my king-sized bed with Jasper, both of us just relaxing and enjoying each others company. I had my head on his stone chest, with my tiny arms wrapped around his torso, and he had his face buried in my black spikes, strong arms around my slender waist.

"I'm bored," I said dully.

Jasper instantly was at my beck-and-call. "What do you want to do, love?" he murmured into my hair.

I thought for a while, and a mischievous grin appeared on my small face, giving me an elfish look. Jasper raised his eyebrows.

"I'm going for a walk and will put my plan into action as soon as I think it out," I giggled madly.

Jasper was terrified. "What is your plan?"

"That's for me to know and you to find out!" I cackled. Then, I roughly shoved him out of our vast bedroom and left him standing, very confused, in the long but thankfully empty hallway.

When he left, I tiptoed into Rosalie's room and picked up her make-up bag. I poked through it sneakily. I took a pretty pink blush out.

But no! There, sitting at the bottom, was a tube of lipstick. I snuck it out, adding an ebony eyeliner pencil and a stick of mascara to the growing pile.

I didn't need the rest of the make-up, so I threw the bag out the window. Perfect!

I smiled evilly and ran back to my room before anyone could catch me and force me to abandon my marvelous plan. Oh boy, Emmett McCarty Cullen. You are in for a big shocker.

The next day...

"Let's play Bella Barbie!" I said in a sudden chipper tone just as Bella was passing my room.

"No!" she squeaked, horrified.

I pouted. "But I wanna play Bella Barbie! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?" I begged, stretching the word into eight syllables.

She melted slightly under my pouting expression.

Chocolate purred and looked up at her with the most adorable, wide eyes ever. "Mew?" he meowed.

Her stubbornness dissolved and she huffed, "Fine."

I squealed in excitment and I dragged her into the room, purposefully not locking the door.

Rosalie came in and saw what I was doing. "Ooh! I wanna do the make-up!" she exclaimed.

"Sure! At least you don't go overboard like someone I know!" Bella cried eagerly in case Rose changed her mind. I stuck my tongue out at her, feeling like a five-year-old who'd been insulted.

"Wait right here! I'm getting my make-up bag!" Rosalie squealed just as loudly as I did.

She ran out of my bedroom and into hers. Everyone in the house could hear her rummaging around for her make-up kit. Ten minutes later, I heard her yell, "Who took my make-up kit?"

"Honey, why would anyone take your make-up bag?" Emmett asked, looking unintentionally guilty.

But Rose barely heard him. She was busy tossing random articles of clothing around the room while searching. "It's not here!" Her voice was muffled.

I waited for Emmy Bear to leave, then glided over to Rose. I sympathetically placed a cold hand on her shaking shoulder and whispered, "It's okay, Rosie. We'll get you your make-up bag."

"But..." she whimpered, her full bottom lip trembling. It was a heart-breaking expression. I wondered,off-topically, if this was what Bella did to make Edward turn into a guilty puddle.

"ALICE!" Edward yelled, irritated.

"Sorry!" I yelled back. Then, I murmured, "Rose, I know where your bag is."

Her head snapped up. "You do?"

"Yes," I answered. "Last night, I saw Emmett acting all sneaky and taking out some of your products. Then, he threw it out the window. I think he was afraid we wanted to dress him up."

Rosalie went from distressed, to hopeful, to flaming mad in under ten seconds. Wow.

"EMMETT MCCARTY CULLEN! GET YOUR UNGRATEFUL...BACKSIDE OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!" she roared. No cursing with Esme in the house.

He came, looking like a dog with its tail between its legs. "Yes, Rosie?"

"WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY MAKE-UP KIT?!"

"Nothing! You know I--"

"NOTHING?! NOTHING?! IF YOU DID NOTHING, THEN WHERE IS IT?!"

"I don't know--"

"OH, THAT REALLY HELPS! DID YOU GO INTO THE ROOM LAST NIGHT?!"

"Yes, but--"

"DO YOU KNOW WHERE MY MAKE-UP BAG IS?!"

"Yes, but--"

"WERE YOU AFRAID WE MIGHT DRESS YOU UP?!"

"Yes, but--"

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY BAG?!"

"Rosie, let me explain--"

"OH, THERE'S NOTHING TO EXPLAIN! YOU'RE IN BIG TROUBLE, YOUNG MAN!"

I took immense pleasure watching Rosalie flay her husband alive. It was even better than watching Emmett get chewed out by Esme for throwing a football too hard and shattering one of her windows.

"I hate you Emmett McCarty Cullen!" Rose yelled. At least she lowered the volume of her voice.

"I love you Rosie," he answered.

"Really?" she gasped.

"Really." Then, they started to get hot and heavy, and I took that as my cue to leave.

As soon as I set foot upon the first floor, I was ambushed by Edward. "What happened?" he demanded.

I giggled, but didn't say anything.

Edward tried to read my mind, but I carefully blocked him out. After years of having a nosy, mind-reading brother who know every secret the family had, I learned to block his power with disturbing (at least to him) mental pictures of Jasper.

Now, I started singing his most annoying and agonizing song in my head, I know a song that gets on every-body's nerves, everybody's nerves, every-body's nerves. I know a song that gets on every-body's nerves, and this is how it goes: I know a song that gets on every-body's nerves...

Edward groaned and clutched his head in agony. "If it gets on every-body's nerves, then why must you sing it, Alice?!" he cried, falling to his knees.

"Who told you to listen?" I sang, and skipped around his lean figure. I was cackling like a witch inside.

Bella came downstairs looking like a goddess, took one look at her beloved Edward, and turned to me. "What's up?" she asked casually, jerking her chin towards the trembling boy.

"He's having some mental problems," I answered, then left her to comfort the quickly recovering Edward.

I then remembered that Rose was supposed to be killing Emmett. The noises coming from their room died down, so I ventured in.

"Rose?" I called

"Yeah?" she called back breathlessly.

"Ummm, I don't know how to say this, but aren't you supposed to be torturing Emmy?" Chocolate appeared again and nodded his fuzzy head violently, agreeing with me.

"I am?" Rose sounded surprised. I pointed to the window. She looked out, and had flames dancing in her eyes when she turned back.

Emmett muttered under his breath, "I was hoping she'd forget. Thanks a lot, Alice."

"You're welcome, and have fun!" I laughed. "Oh, and I hope you don't mind that Chocolate took your Jeep for a quick spin!"

"What?" he choked out, his eyes bulging. I was surprised he could make any noise at all. "Where is it now?"

"Ummm..." I drawled, stalling.

He was getting impatient. "Where is it?!" he demanded,

I chuckled. "Patience is a virtue, Emmett."

"Where?!"

"Oh, it's wrapped around an oak tree half a mile from the house," I said, inspecting my perfectly manicured nails. Chocolate purred his approval.

Emmett howled, then yelped when Rose grabbed his ear painfully. I left.

Author's Note-So, how was it? Please check out my poll on my profile.

And in case you're wondering, Alice stacked cushions on the driver's seat so Chocolate could see out the windshield. As for the gas pedals, she used string sticks attached to kitty-sized shoes and asked Chocolate nicely to wear the shoes. Of course, he obeyed his mistress.

PLEASE REVIEW! If you do, you get to participate in the sale. I'm putting Edward Cullen up for bidding. Let's start with two-hundred, shall we?