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Dragon Age: Final Hour
Chapter 10: Between the Past and Dream
*~ The Past ~*
"How are we going to get up there?" Fen'Harel asked. His eyes were locked on the darkness which forever filled the distant sky. The Fade expanded out from that darkness and covered most of the sky. There wasn't a time in the memory of the People this hadn't been true.
"Mythal," Elgar'nan started, ignoring Fen'Harel, "can you get me up there?"
"I don't think we should enter the blackness," Fen'Harel warned. There was something chilling about the darkness swirling from the Fade. It was enough to make his skin crawl.
"Fen'Harel is right," Mythal started, "we should fight them on their terms, not yet."
"It sounds more like the da'fen is just a little coward," growled Elgar'nan. "We can defeat them without the wolf's help, Mythal."
"I didn't even want to join up in the first place!" Fen'Harel snapped. "But I'm here now and I'm going to help."
Elgar'nan snorted. "All you're doing is suggesting we run away with our tails tucked between our legs like cowards without even trying."
"That's not what I said!" Rage boiled through Fen'Harel's veins. "But running in there blind won't do anyone any good!" he snapped.
"Then be a good little wolf and sniff out the area for us!" Elgar'nan shot back.
Fen'Harel swallowed, his eyes wide as he stared at Elgar'nan. It wasn't what he wanted to do. He couldn't prove Elgar'nan right and back down now. "I will then," the words came out harsh and heated despite the cold creeping into Fen'Harel's veins.
"Elgar'nan," Mythal started, "that's far from fair. And you don't need to prove yourself to us, Fen'Harel."
"I said I'd go," Fen'Harel snapped at them, "and I'll go. I'm not doing it to prove myself to anyone, least of all Elgar'nan!" He shot a glare at the fire wielder. Though Fen'Harel knew his words were a lie, he wasn't about to let Elgar'nan know that he wanted to prove that letting Fen'Harel join wasn't a mistake. That he could be useful and would stand by them now no matter what was to come.
*~ X ~*
"You didn't need to prove yourself to anyone."
The voice pulled Fen'Harel from the past. He wasn't too shocked to find he was in the Fade, though it wasn't a place in the Fade he came to often. The spirit who dwelled here was one of Compassion, one of the older Compassion spirits who still lived and hadn't been turned to Fear.
"You could have found another way."
"Compassion is right," it was Wisdom who spoke this time.
Fen'Harel didn't look at either spirit. Perhaps they were right. Perhaps what he had done back then hadn't been necessary, but it was done now for several thousand years. There was no way he could take back what had happened that day. No matter how long he thought on it and no matter what the spirits told him. It was done.
"But you still regret it. The pain is deep, an old wound, twisting and growing in your heart now that what was warned that day is starting to come forth."
Compassion moved. Unlike with Wisdom Compassion was a bright, white spirit. The voice was always male no matter which spirit he came by, all three of Compassion that he had met in his wanderings. But this one spoke with him the most and he knew the best.
"You wanted them to know, to hear the words you had heard, but you didn't tell them? Why?"
"It doesn't matter anymore," Fen'Harel whispered. "It's all in the past." He closed his eyes, withdrawing into the memory once more.
*~The Past~*
The place Fen'Harel found himself was damp, twisted almost. It wasn't the darkness he had made it to, rather the Fade closest to the darkness within it. He had entered the Fade many times in his dreams, but this was the first time he was physically here. The place was cold and chilling, unlike the areas he had known well close to his home town. Yet, he couldn't help but feel a twinge of excitement go through him.
Despite the damp, cold air, and the feeling that this was a demon's domain, Fen'Harel felt light and happy. To be physically in the Fade hadn't been done yet to his knowledge.
"Go," Elgar'nan hissed at Fen'Harel. "Mythal and I will wait here."
Fen'Harel glanced at the older elvhen and nodded. He kept his features devoid of his excitement and instead started forward into the green tinged landscape of the Fade. Here the dark mass on the horizon seemed all the larger than it did in the physical world. Each step he took towards it, made the feeling of dread increase in him.
Soon he could no longer hear Mythal or Elgar'nan and he knew if he looked behind him, they wouldn't be in sight. But he refused to look back. If he did the small tinge of fear growing in him might burst and he really would run back with his tail tucked between his legs. There was no way he would give Elgar'nan that satisfaction.
That fire wielding mage hadn't even had the courage to enter this far before. This Fen'Harel had up on him at least. He took a deep breath to steady the last of his nerves and continued forward.
There was nothing here. Despite his original belief that a demon ruled over this part of the Fade, nothing moved. There were no taunts he had come to expect when running across demon's domain. It was as if the demon didn't want Fen'Harel as a host, or something else was going on.
A shiver raced through him.
"Well, this is a surprise." The voice was unlike any Fen'Harel had heard before in his life. "I never thought it would be you I would meet first, curious."
"Who are you?" Fen'Harel asked as he turned and looked for the source of the voice.
The voice laughed, a cold laugh which spoke of the dark places under the earth. "My, that is a question. Why not give your name first then I will give mine?"
"If this is some trick to get at me, demon, you will find I won't be swayed," Fen'Harel snarled. The Fade pulsed around him to in force his words.
"Oh-ho!" the voice exclaimed, but it was excitement rather than fear as Fen'Harel had expected. "You really are what I thought you were. I am Geldauran. It is a pleasure to meet you, Fen."
Fen'Harel shivered. That name was one of the Gods' names. Though Fen'Harel didn't know much about him, he did know that if it came down to a fight he would have to give it his all then he might just be able to come out on top. He just had to find the source of the voice, the he could attack. This would be a far better way to prove himself to Elgar'nan than just scouting. To kill one of the gods!
"The name is Fen'Harel now," Fen'Harel snapped. "You'd do well to remember it too, Geldauran."
This made Geldauran laugh again. "Why, it looks like the little wolf doesn't know what I do."
"I'm not a little wolf!" Fen'Harel snarled at this. He knew his anger was drawing on the Fade and that soon his form would take on that of a nightmare. But perhaps it would scare the so called "God."
"But you are a very ignorant one," Geldauran taunted. "Oh, I know all about your kind and the fates that wait you."
"What?" this caught Fen'Harel off guard. "You mean the elvhen you suppress in order to rule over us like gods?" he demanded.
Geldauran laughed again. This time was deeper and harder, as if he found Fen'Harel truly amusing. "An elvhen? Is that what you think you are, da'fen?" asked the so called god.
"I am an elvhen," Fen'Harel snarled, "and nothing you say will prove otherwise!" Fen'Harel forced himself to calm down. The god had to be trying to get under his skin and he wouldn't let it work. But he had to keep the god talking in order to learn of its location. "What are the fates which await the People?" he asked
"None," stated Geldauran, "well, none that you need hear without hearing the fate that awaits your kind."
Fen'Harel bared his teeth in annoyance. He was elvhen. Couldn't the God see that? It was like the villagers all over again, believing he wasn't like them just because he had strange abilities like being able to change into a nightmare of a wolf and manipulate the dreams of those who had bullied him.
"Do you wish to hear it, da'fen?"
"Fine," he growled.
"If your kind goes to war with mine, two outcomes can happen. One, we will win and trap all of you forever within the Void where you will serve us until the end of time."
"That won't happen!" Fen'Harel snarled, glaring around him as he continued to search for the voice.
"My, you are the cocky one, aren't you?" teased Geldauran. "That leads me to the second fate: your kind will win and take our place as the Gods to the elvhen. You will be viewed as the savior Gods, the ones who are light and good, but this will be just as false. As each of you grows into your rule, hunger for more power will start to split your once unbreakable bonds."
At this Fen'Harel laughed. He couldn't help it, but what Geldauran had said was just ridicules. Elgar'nan didn't trust him. Thus there were no so called "unbreakable bonds" between any of them.
"That's rich," he laughed, "what others do you have? More false taunts." He was goading a God and it was most likely very unwise, but right then Fen'Harel didn't care. The so called God was a false prophet as it was. There was nothing he said which could be true.
A hiss came from the shadows close to Fen'Harel. "You arrogant child. Your ears are closed."
"To a false god like you, yes. What else do you have? More on how we're going to fail when we're not going to ever fail. More taunts on how we're not elvhen."
This didn't get the same response from Geldauran as the last. This time he laughed. "You still think you're elvhen? That you will had a place with the People no matter what happens? You're no mage, you're not even a spirit confused into thinking its flesh."
"What? Of course I'm not a spirit!" Though spirits were friendly and kind to Fen'Harel while he dreamed, he found himself offended at this. "I am elvhen no matter what you say!"
"You aren't," Geldauran taunted, "but I am wasting words on you, I see. So, why not show you instead?" Warm, foul breath touched Fen'Harel's neck. He felt a cold hand lock around his shoulders and felt the burn of it against the exposed skin.
Before Fen'Harel could turn to face Geldauran. Before he could even blink – blinding pain raced through him from his back. A shocked gasp escaped Fen'Harel. He could feel warm blood trickle from his mouth. More heat raced through him from his stomach. Shaking, he looked down to see a normal blade had pierced his stomach from behind. The blade was nothing special, but it was enough to kill him.
"If this kills you, then you're right," Geldauran whispered in Fen'Harel's ear, "you are a normal elvhen. If it doesn't then I am right and you are something more, something of both worlds and, in the same moment, something of neither."
The blade was yanked from Fen'Harel. The Fade swam around him as he staggered and struck a pillar of stone. He felt cold and, yet, warm all at once. His eyes were heavy. He couldn't sleep! He had to see this monster who called himself a god. But there was no fighting it. Fen'Harel collapsed to the ground. Darkness swept him away.
Time held no meaning to Fen'Harel. He was locked in a place which wasn't Fade. He couldn't dream, he couldn't see anything at all here. It was blinding, agonizing. Was this death? No – his mind rebelled against that idea.
He had seen the killing blow. He knew he should be dying. But he had assumed the Fade would be there when he died. He had wanted it to be so that he could live forever within the Fade, exploring its forgotten mysteries.
Fen'Harel gasped, drawing in a ragged breath. He was first aware of the stone pressed again him and the tingling of his arm as it tried to regain feeling. He was next aware of the cold and the stiffness. But there was no pain.
So Geldauran had tricked him. Fen'Harel felt a hot fire rage race through him. He should have remembered that thought defined everything here. The blade had never been real and only his mind had made him think it was.
"Oh, the blade is very real. It took it from the mortal realm myself some time ago," stated the cold voice of Geldauran.
Fen'Harel tried to leap to his feet, but he only managed to pull himself into a kneeling position. The Fade spun around him in skinning circles. He felt weak and shaky.
"I think the Fade just helped speed up your healing process, interesting." Geldauran had vanished into the shadows once more, his voice moving as it had from all sides.
"What is?" Fen'Harel gasped. He couldn't stop shaking. He felt too weak to even stand.
"So if I dealt a killing blow to Elgar'nan and threw him into a fire, would it heal him faster or cause wounds? I'll have to test that if we really do start fighting one another. If nothing else it would be amusing to see."
"What are you talking about?" Fen'Harel gasped. "Your trick of the Fade?"
"It was no trick my defiant da'fen. But, rather, the truth coming to light. You are most definitely not an elvhen, but I don't know what you are. The Fade speed up your healing as if you were a piece of it: a spirit; yet, I know you're not that either. How interesting."
The words washed over Fen'Harel as if he had just jumped into a frozen lake. Despite himself, he glanced down to see the blood was very real but the wound had vanished completely, not even leaving a trace that it had been there at all. Then there was the fact he felt so weak. He had only felt this way once before, right when his former master had realized that Fen'Harel wasn't like the other orphaned slaves and had come after him with a sword.
When the blade hadn't killed him Fen'Harel had been hung outside of the village by his arms to starve to death. But now he remembered the blow of the sword and how had fallen asleep after it had cut him and woken to find the wounds gone. It hadn't been death blows, but enough for him to lose several days. He hadn't thought anything of it at the time. But what if what Geldauran said was true? What if he really wasn't an elvhen after all?
"Finally, you're starting to see." Geldauran laughed. "I leave you with that little knowledge, da'fen. Next we meet will be as foe or will accept that the world has no real place for something like you." The words became distant as they turned to laughter. The sound echoed in his ears long after it had vanished from the area around Fen'Harel.
He collapsed against the pillar of stone, shaking with fear. The Fade felt all the colder around him, as if it was trying to tell him that this fear was only the start.
*~ X ~*
It was happening just like Geldauran had predicted. They were tearing one another apart. The bonds which had once been stronger than anything had become weak over the centuries without the now Forgotten Gods being a common foe in their lives. Now Andruil was going to kill all the others in order to take their power for her own once her high priest freed her. She already had Mythal's power.
"They will still listen to you," Compassion told Fen'Harel. "All of them still respect you, Fen'Harel. You were the one who came up with the plan that ended the war with the Forgotten and freed us and the physical world from their taint."
"Perhaps they will," Fen'Harel whispered and buried his head in his hands, "but I doubt it will be for that, Compassion."
"They know you and will see you speak the truth, you just need to trust them." Wisdom moved in so she stood on his other side from Compassion. "And to trust yourself. You know what is right and what is wrong. You also know what will happen to the People if one rises where there were once nine."
"Wisdom," he started in a hoarse voice, "do you believe what Geldauran said about us?"
"I believe what you are, is meant for something special," she told him. "Your people will always need at least one of your kind to guide them even if you are not gods."
"Why do they need us?"
"Because the path ahead will be filled with much more pain for them and you. You need them and they need you. You are the reminder of freedom, you are Solas."
He averted his gaze. "I never even told Elgar'nan that it was Geldauran I met that day. I just told I ran into trouble and nothing else. I give half-truths, I hide behind masks and am more than happy to do so. I am not a reminder of freedom, Wisdom. Only a coward."
He stood.
"I couldn't even save Mythal!"
The feeling of Wisdom's touch was comforting. He wanted to lean into the touch, but knew that was impossible. "Show the others what is happening, what you know will happen. You must do this, Solas."
*~ The Past ~*
When Fen'Harel returned to where the others were. It was to see both of them seated together. Elgar'nan held Mythal's hand and was whispering to her in soothing tones. He stopped and stared at them. It wasn't something he hadn't seen before. Several in his home village had been this way before they had ended up being together and having children.
A small breath escaped him and he settled out of sight of them, knowing they hadn't seen his return. Right then a part of him wanted to run out and stop what was happening. Another knew that Mythal would always be like a sister to him rather than a lover. Yet, there had been a brief moment where he had thought that perhaps they could be more.
He shook his head and contented himself to wait.
"Fen'Harel!" Mythal called to him.
He stood and moved so he could be seen. "I wasn't trying to interrupt," he started.
At this Elgar'nan snorted as if he doubted that it hadn't been Fen'Harel's intention. "Did you find anything, da'fen."
"Some," Fen'Harel confessed. He didn't want to tell them that he had encountered one of the gods, so he told them only part of the truth that he had found some who served the gods and they had delivered a warning. He told them of the two fates which awaited them if they went to war with the gods.
This made Elgar'nan laugh. "Sounds to me like the so called 'gods' are just scared of us." He grinned, fiery eyes shining with anticipation. "You did will, Fen'Harel. Perhaps you're not as useless as I originally believed you would be."
The words were less harsh than anything else Elgar'nan had ever spoken to Fen'Harel before. A small smile twitched at the corners of Fen'Harel's thin lips. This might have just shown Elgar'nan that Fen'Harel could prove himself a valued member of their group and help to stop the false gods.
*~ X ~*
"Speak with them, they will listen," Wisdom repeated.
Fen'Harel sighed and closed his eyes. Perhaps Wisdom was right. After all these centuries, just maybe they could unite once more against a common foe. He nodded.
"I will call a meeting with them."
The words echoed a little before Fen'Harel found himself being drawn to the waking world. For a long moment he hovered between the waking world and the Fade before, at last, he let himself wake.
A soft bed greeted his fingers. His eyes opened a slit to see a familiar ceiling over him. It took him a long moment to realize the sentinels of Mythal must have helped Felassan take Fen'Harel to his old temple. It took even longer for him to realize that the room was clean, showing no signs of being abandoned.
Fen'Harel sat up and stared at the room as if he wasn't really seeing anything that was there. Rather his mind was still in the Fade with Wisdom and Compassion. A part of him wanted to go back, but he knew both would just continue talking to him about what had to be done.
A small breath escaped Fen'Harel. He closed his eyes.
"Master Fen'Harel," a voice greeted him.
Fen'Harel opened his eyes and several of the sentinels of this temple, kneeling before him.
"We're happy to see you've returned to us."
So they hadn't left the temple after all. It was laughable really. All this time he had hoped that they had listened and left their duty to the temple, realizing that Fen'Harel had no desire to be seen as god anymore.
"Where is Felassan?" Fen'Harel asked.
"High Priest Felassan is currently exploring the temple," one of the sentinels informed Fen'Harel.
"Get him here," Fen'Harel instructed them.
"It will be done." They bowed before leaving the chambers to fetch Felassan.
(Author's Note: I've not yet finished the DLC which came out for Inquisition despite the fact I am recording it and slowly posting it on youtube, thus I don't have all of the lore from there and only know of the reference made by one of the Forgotten because Lady Insanity pointed it out on her videos… yeah I spend most of my time running away from mobs at the start of the DLC (level 18 in hard mode in an area which has level 20-26 mobs, fun times)
Though it might not happen, I do have a "series" in my mind revolving around Solas and the times he's awake. Since the designer notes say he was only asleep from one thousand years and we know the fall of Arlathans was two thousand years ago (from the games).)