"Another day, another bunch of people to stalk," Sirius said the next morning as we arrived at the building we'd looked over yesterday. James was still in high spirits after living out a few of his fantasies last night. Not the pathetic seduction attempt by the blonde bimbo but how he'd convinced me I was all he wanted afterwards. I had to admit I'd been sated and relaxed last night too, helping me fall to sleep easily. Unfortunately, another nightmare woke me up early this morning and the good feelings generated from James had ebbed. I was feeling raw with emotions too close to the surface.

"Shall we try the French speaking bloke and his girlfriend scenario again?" Marcus asked. He looked at James this time for agreement.

James' smile dimmed for the first time in more than twelve hours but he nodded after a quick glance at me. "If we must," he grunted. I smiled at him and slipped my hand in his. He leaned in and brushed my lips quickly with his before he and Sirius went in to find their look-out points.

Marcus and I followed a few minutes later. We made our way to the first flat that had a window facing the café across the street. Marcus lifted an inquiring eyebrow and I nodded that I was ready. We heard strange sounds coming from the flat. He knocked on the door and the sounds abruptly ceased.

Marcus knocked again. After a long pause, a muted "Just a minute," came through the door. There were more scuffling sounds. Marcus and I exchanged a bemused glance. The door swung open and a young woman stared at us, tension radiating from her. Her dark hair was messy and her blouse hung askew. She was biting her lip and I noticed the hand that wasn't holding the door was clenching, her knuckles white.

"Bonjour," Marcus tried to look composed but I could tell her appearance startled him also. "Est-Phillipe ici?"

"Who?" The woman was giving us almost pleading looks that belied the even tone of her voice.

"Is anything wrong?" I broke in. I couldn't help myself. It didn't take a genius to realize something was amiss here.

"No, of course not," she said flatly but her expression remained beseeching. She flicked her eyes towards the other side of the flat that the door was blocking from our view.

"May we use your phone?" I didn't know how to get into the flat, but I sensed we needed to. "We're having trouble finding our friend's flat number."

"Um, okay," she said, yet she hesitated clearly unsure.

Marcus stepped firmly into the flat and I followed. Once we were barely past the door, the woman was suddenly shoved out of the way and someone wielding a heavy pan bashed Marcus with it on his head. He fell unconscious to the ground. I reached for my wand, but before I could pull it out, someone else from the other side of the door had grabbed me. He held me from behind trapping my arms at my side. "Bloody eejits," he cursed in my ear. "Barging in when it's not your business, slimy bitch." He shut the door and pulled me back more tightly against him, one hand tightly holding my throat so hard it was difficult to breathe.

"Let me go," I managed to rasp out as I struggled. The beefy hand moved from my throat and quickly settled over my mouth. I couldn't see the bloke holding me, but the other bloke dropped the pan he had hit Marcus with and came forward. He maliciously kicked the woman on the floor in the side before turning back to look at me.

"Now we each have one," he leered at me as he spoke to my captor, swaying slightly on his feet. He was a big bloke with sandy hair and cold eyes. His forehead was sweaty and his clothes rumpled and stained with breakfast or whatever his last meal was. "Better than having to take turns with the one." His hand indicated the woman on the floor who whimpered and tried to scoot on her back away from him, her eyes panicked and her hand holding her hurt side.

My hand still barely clung to the edge of my wand but I wasn't able to move it at all. Whoever holding me was strong and also sweaty judging by the sour smell that wafted from his pores straight to my beleaguered nose. If I could get the arsehole holding me to loosen his grip just a bit, I could take care of both of them easily with my wand. But terror made my body shake and my arms weak. I tried to breathe and calm my racing heart, fighting back the memories that I knew would make me incapacitated with fear.

I squirmed again. "Hold still. You can wiggle for me later when I'm banging you," the man holding me hissed malevolently in my ear. Bile rose in my throat. My heart felt like it had escaped outside of my chest, it was pounding so hard.

"This one's a real looker," the man in front of me said. He moved closer to me and lifted a strand of my hair. The reek of alcohol from his breath staggered me and the horror I had been fighting to keep at bay dropped on me like a stone. Panicked, I fought and for a split second, the hand of the bloke behind me slipped from my mouth. I opened my mouth and screamed. The large hairy hand clamped over my mouth harder. "Shut up, bitch!"

The room seemed to turn black. A hand was over my mouth and another pushed down on my stomach, keeping my writhing body from getting up. The bare ground was hard beneath me and I could see the leaves of an overgrown hedge above and around me. "Hold still, you little bitch," a man's voice snarled. His breath reeked of alcohol and tears leaked from my eyes as I felt his hand move lower on my stomach. I went into a frenzy of movement, kicking my feet and knocking my head back and forth. My arms swung wildly towards him, my fingernails scratching his face. His breath hissed and he hit me, hard on the side of the head. I was choking, his heavy hand cutting off my air. I struggled against the blackness threatening to pull me under, flailing harder. The world was spinning and it was turning darker and darker.

I opened my eyes. There was no hedge. I was inside some flat, trying to control my traitorous body. I couldn't get enough air and I concentrated on breathing through my nose, weakly fighting off waves of nausea. Time had slowed down and I felt every inch of my body in contact with his. The bloke's hand was pressed so hard against my mouth I could not even turn my head. His other arm wrapped around my stomach, holding both of my arms against my sides with no leeway for me to reach my wand.

Marcus hadn't moved, his body lay lifeless on the floor. Dread swept through me again. Don't be dead, don't be dead, don't be dead, my mind intoned uselessly.

My eyes suddenly locked on the woman's terrified eyes as she cowered on the floor. Her helplessness and fear for Marcus galvanized me. A murderous rage billowed up replacing the feeble weakness in my shrinking body with strength. I fiercely tried to bite the man's hand on my mouth and his other hand slipped a little as he swore and grappled to contain me. My hand was able to get just enough leverage to grasp my wand and I whipped it up, shooting a spell at the alcohol-breath bloke in front of me. His legs were knocked out from under him as he crumpled in a heap and the man holding me stiffened in shock giving me an opening. I jabbed an elbow hard in his ribs and when he flinched, turned my wand towards the arm that held my mouth shut. The spell slashed his arm open and he reflexively yanked it away from me yelling in pain and dropping his other arm. I whirled around, my wand moving faster than it ever had.

"DON'T YOU EVER-" the man keeled over as an invisible kick to his groin was delivered "—EVER HURT—" a sharp right jab to his jaw made a gratifying sound "—OR THREATEN OR EVEN THINK OF TOUCHING—" the next punch hit his nose causing the sound of cartilage breaking and blood to spurt out "—ANY CHILD OR WOMAN OR MAN—" the next slash of my wand broke his kneecap and he screamed in pain "—OR EVEN ANIMAL !" The man was sobbing in terror as he curled on the floor. I turned to the other sot whose eyes were wide with fear as he tried to scramble away on his arse on the floor. "THAT GOES FOR YOU TOO!" I yelled and his head jerked back as an invisible punch leveled him flat on the floor and blood and maybe a tooth flew out of his mouth. "I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND-" another slash of my wand caused him to jerk into the fetal position and scream as his groin was slammed "—TORTURE YOU—" My wand seemed to have a mind of its own and he groaned in pain as his kidney was hit hard "-UNTIL YOU KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LI—"

"Lily," I heard James say next to me, his voice full of pain. His arm touched mine gently, careful not to startle me. Something seemed to break open inside of me as I turned and saw his anguished expression. James was here, he would take care of everything. I flung myself in his arms, tears streaming down my face. James held me close as I sobbed incoherently, the room spinning around me. James was solid and warm and I clung to him, my arms a vise around his shoulders. He held me securely, protecting, his large hands splayed on my back as I buried my face against his chest, my weeping eyes wetting his shirt.

After an indeterminate length of time, I was able to stop crying and look around the flat from the safety of James' arms. My body was still shaking so hard, I could not have remained standing without his support. To my infinite relief, Marcus was conscious, though grimacing in pain and directing his wand to bind the two men's hands behind their backs. The first was unconscious; the second looked like he wished he was as he moaned in pain. Sirius was helping the woman sit on a comfortable chair. Her eyes were wide and she was trembling as she stared at the two prone men. When she saw my head turn, her gaze collided with mine. In her eyes was a curious mixture of gratefulness—a look almost of hero worship—and apprehension.

"What h-happened?" I asked James, wiping my eyes and face with the handkerchief he'd produced.

"Both Sirius and I heard you scream, which was quickly cut off," James said, his voice grim. His eyes were murderous and his face harder than I'd ever seen it. "We came down here and blasted through the door to find that git beat up and knocked out, and you in the process of kicking the shit out of the other git."

Sirius moved close to us. "His breath smelled like al-alcohol," I stuttered. James' forehead furrowed.

Sirius gave me an unfathomable look as he spoke to James. "Take Lily home. Marcus and I will clean this up."

James nodded and handed Sirius his invisibility cloak. Once we'd apparated back to the flat, he gave me some chocolate, not the muggle kind which only tastes good but the wizard kind that warms you up from the inside out. Then he put me to bed, gently taking off my shoes and socks before cradling my shivering body in his arms as we lay without speaking. The pillowcase felt cool and smooth beneath my cheek. My mind was curiously blank. I concentrated on counting James' breaths and the steadying warmth of his body wrapped around mine until the bliss of oblivious sleep took me under.

When I woke up, I could tell a few hours had passed by the slant of the sun in our room. James moved as I stirred and kissed my temple. "Hungry?" he asked quietly.

Surprisingly, I was. I nodded and we got up and went to the living room. Sirius and Beth were cuddled on one of the couches, Sirius' hand combing through Beth's hair as Beth read him a passage from the book on her lap. They both looked up, their eyes full of concern as I came in and flopped on the other couch.

"I made lunch," Beth said starting to rise.

"Let me get it," James looked anxious to keep busy and he moved quickly to the kitchen.

I turned to Sirius. "Everything okay over there now?" I was proud my voice only cracked a little.

"Yeah," Sirius said solemnly. "Marcus talked to the woman—her name is Trudi-while I took the blokes one at a time to the police station using James' invisibility cloak. She was accosted by the two creeps when she answered the door, expecting a friend she had plans with. They had been tearing apart her place searching for money and valuables when you and Marcus knocked on the door. They only let her open the door because they were thought it was her friend and they knew she'd call the police if no one answered. They told her to tell her friend she was sick and get her to leave or they'd hurt her friend too." He paused, looking both sickened and furious. "They threatened to rape her."

James heard the last part as he came back with a plate of sandwiches for lunch. Bottles of butterbeer floated behind him and he set the food on the coffee table with arms suddenly shaky. "Fucking rotters," he growled, passing out plates. "You did good taking them out, Lily." Suddenly he froze and stared at me. "Did they threaten you too?"

He saw the answer in my bleak expression. "Dammit!" James picked up one of the bottles of butterbeer and threw it hard against the wall. It shattered and streaks of butterbeer darkened the paint.

James sat next to me and hauled me in his arms. "I'm so sorry, Lil," he said. I shuddered as he ran his hands over my back. After several minutes, he looked at Sirius. "Those bastards had better not be anywhere I can go after them."

Sirius shook his head. "They're in the hospital and will be moved to prison once they're well enough. Marcus has a mate who is a police officer. He found out they have outstanding arrest warrants. They've done this before."

Sirius continued after a minute where we took that in. "The first one was sent to the Emergency Room, the second might have to go there too but was headed to a clinic. We decided not to obliviate the prats' memories. We thought Lily's threat might be good for them to remember and no one will believe them if they tell how she hurt them. If they can, that is. According to police records, they're drug addicts and have been ordered into mandatory treatment in the past. The one that was conscious kept babbling that he needed a fix. He had been drinking some of Trudi's alcohol before Lily and Marcus arrived." He looked at me sympathetically. "He wasn't drunk but that's why his breath had such strong alcohol fumes."

"How did you find out so much about their records?" Beth asked. "Isn't that confidential information?"

Sirius nodded grimly. "Marcus used the invisibility cloak to sneak into the interrogation room after the officer had pulled their records in preparation to charge them."

"What about Trudi?" I asked my voice tremulous.

"We decided to obliviate her memory once we discovered the sodding perverts had priors—they're wanted. They have thick files- her testimony won't be needed to convict them. After we obliviated Trudi's memory, we waited outside her flat until her friend arrived. We dressed as officers and knocked on the door to warn them a couple of thugs were canvassing the area and to not open their door without checking. She's fine." Sirius looked at me. "She's better off not knowing what almost happened to her."

I wilted a little in relief and took a bite of one of the sandwiches Beth was passing around. We ate ravenously and I realized Beth and Sirius had also delayed eating for me. "Marcus waited for you to wake up, but eventually left. He felt guilty that they were able to knock him out and he left you to fight them alone," Sirius told me after a few minutes.

"It wasn't his fault," I said shakily. "They surprised both of us. One of them bashed Marcus over the head as the other grabbed me."

"Can you tell us what happened?" James asked me carefully. He put his arm around me and tucked me closer to his side.

I ran my hands through my hair agitatedly. "The bloke grabbed me from behind just as I was reaching for my wand. I couldn't move. He threatened me and when I told him to let me go, he put his hand over my mouth. The other bloke came close and his breath smelled like alcohol. I remembered…." I stopped, overcome.

"Was it the same memory you had before?" Beth asked softly.

I nodded. "Yes, with more details. But I still don't remember much."

James rubbed my shoulder. I took another shuddering breath. "I tried to scream but he cut me off. I think I bit the bloke's hand and was able to reach my wand. And then, I don't really know what I did except I knew I was screaming at them and my wand was just slashing through the air. I was so furious and my heart was practically leaping out of my chest and I felt like I was going to be sick to my stomach."

"She wiped the floor with their sorry sodding arses," Sirius told Beth with a savage note of satisfaction in his voice.

"I was out of control," I said, my body starting to shake again. "I could have killed them."

James pulled me against his chest. "You were easier on them than I would have been," he said venomously.

"But I wasn't fully conscious of what I was doing," I protested. "I felt like I was watching someone else torture them. It is scary feeling like you are not in control of your actions." I clenched my teeth to keep them from chattering. I hated being in shock and I hated that I still felt sick to my stomach and I hated whatever kept happening to me to bring all these feelings of panic. I had never hurt anyone that much before and it frightened me that I was capable of it. Even in self-defense, my violence towards the blokes had been excessive. "I don't know what to do," I admitted wearily, my head dropping to James' chest.

"You need to go talk to your parents," Beth said, her tone matter of fact. At my startled glance, she nodded reassuringly. "It sounds like something awful happened to you at some point in your life. They may know."

James rubbed my arm. "I'll take you whenever you want."

"Let's go this afternoon," I said. One of the many benefits of magic was quick travel over short distances. I'd popped in to see my parents a few times on weeknight evenings when I had a little free time. I knew they would likely be home relaxing on a Sunday afternoon.

I called my parents to let them know we were coming over and that there was something important I needed to talk to them about. Less than an hour later, my mother ushered James and I into the living room when we arrived. My dad stood up and kissed me before we arranged ourselves on various pieces of furniture.

"What's wrong, Lily?" My mum looked at me worriedly. I had put make-up over my cheeks and throat to conceal the bruises, but I knew my eyes were wide and distressed. My dad leaned forward, his shoulders tense.

I wasn't sure how to start so I just dove awkwardly in. "Did someone attack me or try to hurt me when I was a child?" I asked baldly. My hands twisted together and James covered them with his large hand.

My mum started, her hand flying to cover her mouth. My dad stared at me slack jawed. "Did something happen to you, Lily?"

"I've had strange memories a couple times," I told them. "And I've been having nightmares. Some man is holding me down against the ground and I'm panic-stricken trying to escape."

Tears filled my mum's eyes and coursed down her cheeks. My dad looked away, grief and guilt etched on his face. My mum spoke first. "We weren't sure if we should talk about it with you. You were so young-we hoped you wouldn't remember it again. You seemed to have forgotten it."

"Mum," I leaned towards her anxiously. "Please, this is driving me crazy. Tell me what happened."

My mum took a deep breath. "When you were seven, we went out one beautiful June day. We had been driving around Hampshire heading towards the sea. We stopped for lunch at a large park. It was a little early for lunch and we didn't see anyone else there. After lunch, Petunia and I went to take a walk. You said you didn't want to come with us, so we left you with your dad." She stopped, wiping her eyes.

My dad spoke, his voice raspy. "Just a couple minutes after they left, you changed your mind. You wanted to walk with them. I could see your mum and Petunia in the distance and I called to them as I watched you scamper after them. Then a car pulled up and someone asked me for directions. I turned away to answer. When the car had left, I looked back and could no longer see you or your mum and Petunia. I assumed you had reached them." He looked at his hands sadly his head bowed. "I was wrong."

There was a long pause. My mum waited and then picked up the story when my dad remained quiet. "We're not sure exactly what happened. I didn't hear your dad call that you were following us, and Petunia and I descended a small hill and were no longer in your eyesight. Some man grabbed you as you walked past. He pulled you under a huge overgrown hedge and was—well, he was going to hurt you. Your dad heard you screaming and he ran to find you. You were sitting on the ground in an open spot in the middle of the hedge. Your dress was dirty and your new pink shoes were scuffed. The man was lying a few feet away. He was dead."

Silence. I looked at James, my eyes wide. James chafed my cold hands between his.

"You were screaming and sobbing," my dad continued. Tears came from his eyes and he wiped them away gruffly. I had never seen my dad cry before and it made my chest ache. "You couldn't tell me what had happened. I picked you up and held you. Your little arms clung to me, your body was shaking so hard your teeth were clattering and you wouldn't let go."

"The police came," my mum's voice was shaky. "Later they told us there was evidence the man had molested children before. They think he stumbled backwards over a root in the ground and fell. His head hit a rock and he died instantly."

James made a sound that sounded like "good."

"You had a small lump on your head and bruises on your cheeks from him covering your mouth," my mum's throat worked as she talked. "The police believe he hit you. There were marks on the ground where your body had been pressed in the dirt. The doctor who examined you said you were not raped. Your clothes were still on. He didn't know if the man had time to touch you—down there. You would cry and become incoherent when we asked you about it."

I clutched James' hand harder. His eyes were wet when I looked at him.

"Years later, we guessed your magical powers saved you," my mum said slowly. "That wasn't the first time a strong emotion caused something inexplicable—to us anyway-to happen with you. We didn't even realize you had magical powers—we didn't know wizards and witches existed yet. But the man was strong and we don't know what else would have stopped him when he had a tiny seven-year old pinned on the ground."

"You..you didn't send me to therapy?" I asked croakily.

My mum and dad looked at each other. "We tried a few times but you became hysterical." My mum put her head down and rubbed her forehead. "We decided to wait a little while until you were less upset. You had nightmares for several weeks. But then suddenly, your nightmares stopped. When I tried to ask you about that day, you couldn't remember it anymore."

"We didn't know what to do," my dad said unsteadily. "You were happy again."

"We're so sorry, baby," my mum rasped.

I shook my head, my heart reaching out to them. I knew they had suffered so much. Maybe more than me. "You did the best you could."

My dad stood up and stalked to the window angrily. His shoulders shook and his voice broke as he spoke. "You'll never know, Lily, how much I blame myself for what happened to you. I was supposed to protect you. I didn't watch you closely enough. You are my little girl and I failed you."

"Oh Dad," I went to the window and hugged him from behind. "You didn't fail me."

My dad drew a shaky sigh. "It's the worst feeling in the world," he said turning around and holding me closely. "To know you cannot protect your own child." There was nothing I could say so I just hung on as tight as I could.