November 21st 5:40:21 p.m.:
Dear Diary,
I think I am going to start off with a quote today:
Sometimes I wish I was a little kid again because scrapped knees are easier to fix than a broken heart.
I like that saying. It fits perfectly.
For Halloween all of us dressed up as sexy black cats. It was Macey's idea of course. We won best group costume.
When I went into town to get my costume, I saw him. Josh. I tried to avoid him, didn't work out. He came over with his arms over Dee-Dee's shoulders, which hurt like hell. He could move on from me, but I couldn't move on from Zach. Maybe it was for the best. We talked, it was extremely weird. He finally left. We were shopping for costumes for about 2 hours.
Sometimes I wonder if Zach ever thinks of me. If he really truly cares about me. He didn't mean to break my heart (well I hope not), but he did.
Sometimes I tell myself that I don't love him; That I don't want to see him; That he was the reason for everything I hate in this world. Some days he is all I think about. I tell myself I love him; that I would do anything to see him one last time; that he is the reason for all the things I love. And then on the other side I couldn't care about what my feelings were for him. That was when I was dating Josh. Josh. One of the mistakes in my life, but on the other hand it made me forget about Zach. It was nice, then. I liked it, then. It's now, now.
Last quote of the day:
When I first saw you I fell in love, you smiled because you knew. ~ William Shakespeare
Much Love,
Cammie
…
I got up off my seat in the library and headed towards my room.
I unlocked the door, no one was there. I saw a book on Bex's bed. It was black, with a pink heart on it. I opened. Oh my gosh. This is Bex's diary.
Dear Diary,
Gosh this is dumb. I am not going to call this a diary it makes me feel like I am 12 again. So I will give you a name. Cammie. That is my best friend's name. I normally would tell her all of this, but I just can't. It is too personal, and it could hurt her. So here goes:
Dear Cammie,
Hey! Cov Ops was super easy today! We went to the Jersey Shore! It was a lot of fun! I may or may not have kissed a really cute guy. It was my cover though, a beach babe slut. I thought I knew him at first, he had brow hair but with bleach blonde high lights. It looked like he died his hair brown. Weird. Most people want to be a blonde. People might call him a dumb blonde though. It makes me think of Grant, my dumb blondie. I miss him like crazy. The only reason I am doing this is because I saw Cam do this. I read the first entry, she said it helps to write things down so here it goes:
No.
I am not okay that we never see each other.
No.
I am not okay that I never hear from you anymore.
No.
I don't like that we drifted apart.
No.
I don't like that I hate when we aren't together.
And.
No.
I don't like that I feel in love with you, it just happened, and I wouldn't want it any other way.
It's so hard to pretend you don't love him when you do. It really truly is. That's why I am building up a wall, which hopefully the right guy can break down. It might take a while, but I will wait. I am not afraid to fall in love, I am afraid of falling in love with the wrong guy. I would give anything to kiss Grant one last time. To let him know that I truly love him more than life it's self. If Grant is reading this, I love you.
Heart Broken,
Bex
I shut her diary. Someone was unlocking the door I threw her diary on the bed, and jumped on my bed while grabbing a text book. Bex came in. "Hey girlie." She said. "Hi." I said quietly. "Are you okay?" She asks. "Kind of." I said the most truthful thing all month. "What's wrong?" She asked. "I am in love with Zach." I said. "Is there something bad with that?" She asked. "Yes. There is. I haven't seen him in four years." I said. "Time makes the heart grow stronger." She said plainly. "I want to be with him though." I say. She nods her head and walks over and hugs me.
There is a knock on the door. I get up to answer it. "Oh Mr. Solomon what is wrong?" I ask. "I don't know how to tell you this but here goes." He takes a deep breath, I nod my head.
"Ms. Morgan your cousin Tiffany has gone into M.I.A."
Yea! Another chapter! I got two up in one day! Yippee! Please review! I only got like 4 reviews to the last chapter. So… when I get 10 reviews I will update. I know I am mean…
Much Love,
~H
P.S. For those who do review thank you so much!