"examine problem sleuth poster."
No one had any idea why Homestuck's style changed all of a sudden. These commands, given to characters, had a great deal of importance, after all. Perhaps they were actually taken from other people, and not all people, in Homestuck's early days, viewed the adventure as the same. Or perhaps everything was written by Hussie after all, and he was simply imitating the style.
Though, even though Andrew Hussie, the man who created Homestuck, was supposed to give an explanation, he instead went to another room, where he kept every poster ever produced from MS Paint Adventures. As it turns out, MSPA was fairly famous even before Homestuck, and was selling posters of the adventure that came before it, Problem Sleuth. Naturally, the four readers followed, while Dave and Jade thought they weren't missing that much out.
"Let's see... Homestuck... Homestuck... Homestuck... Vriska..."
"excuse me, vriska?" John inquired.
"She's a Homestuck character."
"then why did you mention vriska separately from homestuck?"
"Let's say... let's say..." Hussie was confused. "We have special ties."
Everyone, for a while, looked at the poster Hussie called "Vriska". There were eight versions of the same girl, with gray skin and horns that reminded the human characters of candy corn, in various combinations of dead, alive, enjoying herself and being depressed, as well as a different clothing style for each incarnation.
"i can see that!" Calliope was excited.
"LISTEN. IF YOu START MACKING ON THIS VRISKA GIRL. THEN YOu MIGHT MOVE WITH HER."
"bUt we don't even know if she exists!"
"THAT'S THE POINT."
"...Homestuck... Homestuck... Ha! I knew it was somewhere. The same Problem Sleuth poster, live." Hussie pointed at the poster, giving it a slight hit and making the characteristic poster sound, then put his arms away.
"pretty nice." John remembered the early days (of both his life and MSPA, that is), when he tried getting into Problem Sleuth, but didn't find himself being stuck with every single joke. "let's just hope you don't also have the note on the drawer around."
"What? No. Who would buy that?"
"Did you just imply that Homestuck is actually a massive money-driving machine?" Rose's suspicion grew.
"Oh my god, no. No. It's its own story, that I tell as I wish, and simply see the fanbase grow as people become interested in troll romance or something. The merchandise is just a secondary point, and how I make my living."
"You... your entire subsistence is derived from Homestuck? Huh." Rose felt like she was receiving more and more puzzle pieces that didn't quite come together yet. Perhaps, if she, in the future, got even more puzzle pieces, the big picture would finally start to appear. Was the MS Paint Adventures Wiki a good place to start investigation? Rose wasn't sure, and she didn't want to have her experience interrupted by her own trip to the magic world of the Internet.
"IT'S ITS. WOW. WHAT A GREAT WAY TO GIVE ME A HEADACHE." Caliborn, on the other hand, was still getting around to being among humans.
"Listen, if you don't want to read Homestuck that much or hate me personally..."
"I'M TENDING TO CALLIOPE. NO, I WON'T SIMPLY LEAVE."
"Very well." Hussie and the "kids" who were really adults returned to reading Homestuck, starting with the next page, "John: Read note on drawer."
"that is so my father... what, will my nanna show up next?"
"What? She's been dead for, like, since you were born..."
"no, she's alive. and probably helping dad bake cakes or something, since they want more cakes for this birthday than their last."
"Look, she was killed by the meteor that..."
"METEOR. METEORS DON'T EVEN KILL PEOPLE. NOT EVEN THE ONE IN RuSSIA, WHICH EVERYONE SAW. THAT'S HOW WEAK THEY ARE."
"Actually, yes, they do. In India, that one time..."
"next page!" John felt like a lot of this commentary could be avoided if people simply got on with reading Homestuck. Hussie obeyed his order and clicked the link, and John began reading the newly opened page:
"you wonder what is printed on the poster." John read the newly opened page.
"NO, I DON'T."
"These aren't even your thoughts, Cali. They're John's."
"THEN WHY ARE THEY WRITTEN IN SECOND PERSON. EITHER IT'S THIRD PERSON. WHERE THE NARRATOR COMPLETELY DISINTEGRATES HIMSELF FROM THE REST OF THE STORY. OR FIRST PERSON. WHERE THE NARRATOR IS AN ACTuAL CHARACTER. BuT NO. YOu HAD TO CHOOSE THE LAMEST WAY. AND INSIST THAT I AM SOMEHOW IN THE STORY. BEING JOHN. I MEAN ZOOSMELL."
"It's actually John."
"SEE? YOu'RE DOING IT AGAIN. MAKING ME HAVE THOuGHTS. THAT I WOuLDN'T HAVE. IF YOuR GNARLED CLAWS DIDN'T LITERALLY REACH MY MIND."
"alright, calm down. i still have a birthday party to have, and i am... let's just read this. acquire hammer and nails..."
"what / hammer / nails / since when are they are in minecraft" Dave briefly got from his trance again.
"They're in Homestuck, actually." Rose filled Dave in.
"oh / your homestuck thing / im telling you / me and jade will be catching up later" Dave returned to his game.
"let's see. so i pick up the hammer and then the nails... ouch." John actually felt physically hurt, even though it was his Homestuck counterpart who was slapped in the face with the fake arms.
"OH MY GOD. IT'S A PERFECT METAPHOR, WHAT I SEE RIGHT HERE."
"Really?" Rose was already sick of Caliborn's metaphors.
"YOU SEE. JOHN... I MEAN ZOOSMELL SuBCONSCIOuSLY WANTS TO FACEPALM. BuT HE CAN'T. BECAuSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO uSE HIS ARMS. THAT DON'T EXIST. SO THEREFORE. THE VERY FIRST THING THAT HE TAKES. IS THE FAKE ARMS. THAT ALSO EXIST IN THE STORY. SOLELY FOR THIS METAPHOR. AND ONCE HE CLOGS uP HIS SYLLADEX. THE FAKE ARMS ARE OuT. AND JOHN FACEPALMS HIMSELF. WITH HIS SYLLADEX. AND, IN FACT, DOES IT TWICE."
"Look, John's arms were..."
"I MEAN ZOOSMELL. BECAuSE THAT'S WHAT HIS NAME IS. ZOOSMELL POOPLORD."
"His arms were actually depicted, holding the fake arms, very briefly, a couple of pages ago, when he was holding the fake arms."
"WHAT. YOu MEAN THERE WAS A PICTURE. OF ARMS THAT HOLD ARMS. I BET. YOuR HuMAN ARTISTS. HAVE COME uP WITH A VARIATION. WHERE THE ARMS HOLD THE ARMS. AND THOSE ARMS HOLD A PAIR OF ARMS AS WELL. AND SO ON. AND SO ON. EITHER IN A TWISTED LOOP. OR CONTINuING FOREVER."
"Sounds like something M.C. Escher would do."
"M.C. WHAT?"
"M.C. Escher. Oh, I think he actually did something similar. It was about arms drawing arms."
"WHAT. HOW ON EARTH DOES AN ARM EVEN DRAW ITSELF."
"No, an arm was drawing a second arm, which in turn was drawing the first arm..."
"THE DRAWING IS AN INANIMATE OBJECT. uNLESS IT'S A DEPICTION. IT CAN'T POSSIBLY DRAW THE DRAWER. IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE."
"Well, it's an illusion..."
"LET'S JUST AGREE THAT YOuR HuMAN ARTISTS DON'T MAKE SENSE AT ALL."
Everyone was pondering Caliborn's words. Perhaps, the true way to art would be to just ignore the efforts of "human artists" as having any hidden meaning, up to and including Homestuck.