Shadow Says
Shadow was laying in a hammock when suddenly, a gorilla knocked him out of it. Shadow reacted by punching said gorilla in the face.
"And that kids, is how to deal with strangers who try to bother you while you're sleeping."
"Not the moral Shadow!" The director admonished.
"Are you sure?"
"You're supposed to tell kids about the dangers of wandering away from their parents!"
Shadow shrugged. "Oh sure, I can do that. Don't wander off from your parents, kids. Terrible things could happen to you. Such as: getting mugged, falling off a cliff, drowning in the river, getting hit by a car, getting kidnapped by pedophiles and locked away in their rape dungeon…"
"That's enough Shadow! We don't need anymore examples!" The director said hurriedly.
"…getting murdered by a serial killer who wants to cook and eat your organs…"
"Cuuuuuuuut!"