The exam room door opened, and House's next patient staggered in. He reached a hand out toward House, tried to say something and fell to the floor. House walked over and bent down to check for a pulse. There was none. The guy was dead. House called out to the waiting room. Dr. Chase came rushing in. "What seems to be the trouble?" He asked.
"I can't work with this patient," House said, waving down at the corpse. "He's dead."
"Wow," Chase bent down and checked for breathing. "I never thought I'd see the day when you killed one."
"I didn't kill him." House argued. "He came in that way."
"A dead man walked into the clinic?" Chase wasn't buying it.
"He wasn't dead when he walked in," House said in frustration. "He was dying. He dropped dead when he got in here."
"The sight of you no doubt," Chase muttered under his breath. He looked up quickly, hoping House hadn't heard him.
"I won't forget that." House reprimanded. "Now go get the police. The man was murdered."
"What!" That had gotten Chase's attention.
"Go!" House ordered.
Chase returned a few minutes later. "Dr. Cuddy said to stay in here. The authorities are on their way." He stood in the doorway, nervously. House and a dead body, this wasn't exactly his idea of a good time.
Their silence was interrupted by the clearing of a throat in the doorway.
"May I help you?" House asked. Chase spun around to see who he was talking to.
"Gil Grissom, Las Vegas Crime Lab. I am working with the NJPD. We are here to process the scene."
"Well," House eyed the man suspiciously. "I know this is a happening hospital and all, but I didn't realize it was the scene." He stressed the word "the" before scene, the way the kids these days do to signify that something is number one in it's field.
"Would you step aside please." Grissom was not amused.
House stepped aside and made a flourish with his cane. Grissom walked past him, eyeing him suspiciously. He was followed by a buxom redhead. She was older than House liked them, but not bad on the eyes. He gave her a little smile. She smiled back.
"This is Kathrine Willows," Grissom made the introduction. "She will start processing. I have some questions."
"Shoot." House said, and threw his hands up in the air as if the man had a gun pointed at him.
"Which one of you is Dr. House?" He looked from Chase to House and back again.
"Guilty." House replied.
"Interesting choice of words." Grissom wrote something in his little notepad.
"I know. There were so many to choose from, but that one just popped into my pretty little head." He looked over at Willows. She was squatting by the body, and he could see down her shirt if he twisted his neck just a little.
Grissom followed his gaze, and cleared his throat trying to get House's attention. House didn't move his gaze. "Yes?" He said.
Grissom continued his questioning. "Did the victim say anything to you before he died?"
"You mean other than naming his killer, along with a detailed description? No." This guy was being so serious that House couldn't help himself.
"So that's a no."
"Yes."
Grissom just looked at him. So House clarified his statement. "Yes, it's a no."
"Fine." Grissom wrote in his notepad again. House stopped admiring the view as Willows got up and moved behind him. Now he decided to see what this guy was writing in his little book. Grissom pulled the notepad to him so that House couldn't see.
"Do you have any idea who this guy was?"
"Nope."
"Why he would come see you?"
"My guess is, he was sick. But I might be jumping to conclusions because of the fact that he died and all." This was too easy.
Grissom scribbled something else in his book. "You told this man," he pointed to Chase, "that you thought the victim was murdered. Care to explain that?"
"Love to." House clapped his hands together. "See, his eyes were dilated, and his mouth had a slight mist of foam coming out of it." Grissom looked over to Willows, and she nodded silently, confirming what House said.
"Go on."
"It was obvious the man had been poisoned. Now, people don't usually drink poison of their own free will, unless they are trying to kill themselves, in which case, it would probably not be smart to go to a hospital where people will try and save you."
"Maybe he had a change of heart," Willows said from behind House. He could feel her breath on his arm. He fought the urge to turn around.
"I doubt that. Look at him, looks like he'd been living in a dumpster. The homeless are less likely to have a change of heart after a suicide attempt. But I'm not the expert. You are, so I don't really know why you asked me in the first place."
Grissom looked at him. This guy was unbelievable. "Don't leave town." Grissom started helping Willows process the scene. House and Chase stood where they were, watching.
After the body was removed, and all the evidence was collected, Grissom approached House once more. "Do you have anything to add?"
"I would track down his ex-wife." House had a smug smile on his face. He knew the man was married because of the faint ring mark on his left ring finger.
"We noticed the ring mark too. What a sad twist of fate to drop dead in front of the doctor who could have saved your life." Grissom had a pensive look on his face.
For no reason whatsoever, House heard the beginning strains to a Who song pop into his head. "Who are you, who who who who who?" He started humming it as the CSI team left.