"Where do they live?" I asked.

"Dodo lives over there," Jack pointed to the West, at what looked like a small cottage. "And Mummy Dearest lives over there." Near the cottage was a castle. Jack pointed to it. "Remember," he said, "they both hate us. Especially you, Alice. So be careful. And they're both likely to be in the White Queen's castle."

"What happened to the White Queen?" asked Alice.

"Beheaded. Last year," I answered.

"So, on with the plan?" asked Violet.

"Yep," said Alice, "Hatter, do you have your cell?"

I checked my pockets and pulled out a cell phone. "Yeah."

"Call me when you're thrown into jail or something."

I nodded. "Kiss for good luck?"

Alice kissed me one last time before I headed into the castle.

****

"Hello?" I called out. "Anyone here?"

No answer. Just echoes.

I started to hum to myself. Occasionally I would call out something like, "Look at me! Defenseless and injured!"

Nothing.

"I'm in the middle of the enemy's palace and the one time I want trouble, I don't get it," I muttered.

"What?" A feminine voice answered my muttering.

"Who's there?" I spun around to find the source of the voice.

"No one of consequence."

"Oh really? Then come out and face me, coward," I taunted.

"Are you really alone or do you have friends hiding somewhere?"
"Why would I tell you that? But yeah, totally alone." I continued to walk along the hallway.

"I wouldn't step there."

I stopped in my tracks. "What? Why?" I asked.

"That's a trap, right there."

"Thank you, I guess." I stepped around the spot. "Wait a minute, why are you helping me?"

"I dunno," answered the voice, "possibly because I know you quite personally and I don't wish you harm."

"So you're friend, not foe?" I asked the obvious.

"Hopefully."

"How come I can't see you?"

"Because I don't feel the need to be seen."

"How can you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Be invisible."

"Oh. Cheshire cat technology," she replied easily.

"Where's Dodo? The Queen of Hearts?"

"Second floor. Why?"

"Because of the plan." I was telling a lot to a person I couldn't even see. In my mind, I went through all the women who knew me personally, other than Violet and Alice. No one in particular came to mind.

"Hmmm. Don't tell me the plan, I don't want to know."

"Are there any stairs here?" I wondered aloud, "Or some sorta way up?"

"There's an elevator to you're left," advised to helpful voice. "Although, I wouldn't suggest going there at the moment. Dodo's in a fit and the Queen's taking a nap."

"Wonderful," I said sarcastically, "all the better." I reached the elevator. Quickly, I ran inside and punched the second floor button. Up rose the elevator.

The doors open to what looked like another hallway.

"Would anyone like to attempt to kill me again?" I yelled. "I mean, you both have before but-"

I was cut off by the Dodo, who burst out of one of the numerous rooms at the sound of the voice. "You! I swore my men killed you!"

"Obviously not. But I am alone now, so go ahead, I really don't mind," I said. I began to tell a false story, "My girlfriend's abandoned me. It's quite a sad story, actually-"

"I could care less." Dodo clapped. Three armed guards came out from behind the pillars. "Take him to the dungeon."

"A dungeon? Really?"

"Yeah, now let's get going." A guard hit me in the back with his gun.

"Oi! Watch where you're poking that thing!" Quietly, I pulled the phone out of my pocket. I clicked the phone to dial Alice.

She picked up immediately. "Hello? Hatter?"

I cleared my throat.

"Oh!" She hung up.

*****

"See, I told you not to go annoying them," said the voice.

"It was part of the plan!" I exclaimed.

"Yes, whatever. So do you wait until you're rescued by whoever you called or do I have to do it?"

"Who are you?" I cried.

"A queen, that's all I'll say."

"The Queen of Hearts?"

"No."

"Hmmmmm." I thought about that.

"You never answered my question."

"Alice, my girlfriend, should be here fairly soon."

"You must really trust her."

"Yeah, with my life."

"I approve of her."

"And I care about what you think, why?" I asked.

"I shouldn't have said that."

. "Okay..." I raised an eyebrow.

My phone began to ring. Quickly, I answered it. "Hello?"

"Hatter, where are you?" asked Alice.

"The dungeon."

"Where's that?"

"No idea."

"Tell her it's below the basement." The queen I couldn't see told me.

"Below the basement," I said to Alice.

"I'll be down there in a min-"
"Drop the thing and come out with your hands up."

Immediately I dropped the phone and walked out of the cell doors. Dodo, pointing a gun at my back, lead me to a chair.

"Oh, not this bloody thing again," I cursed as Dodo handcuffed my wrists to the chair's arms.

"Where's your precious Alice now, Hatter?" taunted Dodo.

"I dunno, you've got me."

"Really?"

"What is it you want anyway?"

"Power, riches. Everything."

"So, why am I in the way?"

"You aren't. You're girlfriend is."

"But you have the ring. Which means total and complete power here."

"No, I don't. Alice does."

"No she doesn't," I argued.

"Yes, she does, because I don't."

"You're both wrong." A woman in shimmering white clothing appeared out of no where.

Dodo spun around to face the source of the voice whom I had been speaking to earlier.

"Mum?" I asked, unbelieving.

"Oh-oh my. But-but the Queen executed you last summer," stuttered Dodo.

Before us stood the White Queen, my mum.

"Not so," she said, "And, by the way, I've the ring."

"How-?" asked Dodo.

"Mum!" I exclaimed, "But-but, you left when I was 15! When did you become the White Queen?"

"When I left you're father, I went off and married the then-White Prince. And he inherited the throne. We ruled for 15 years and then the Queen of Hearts took power. She murdered my husband and attempted to murder me, but I ran off and hid with the White Knight for a while."

"That's Charlie!" I cried.

"Yes, and when the Queen was tired of looking for me, she gave up and told the public that I was beheaded. Dodo, untie my son."

"Yes-yes ma'am." He scrambled over to my chair and released me.

"And you have the ring, Mum?" I asked.

She nodded.

"Hatter, there you are!" Alice ran from a stairwell behind us. "Who is this?"

"Alice, this is the White Queen, my mum."

"You said she was beheaded last year!" Alice didn't understand.

"I wasn't actually murdered."

"Oh."

"Mum, this is Alice, my girlfriend," I finished introducing them to each other.

"Lovely to meet you, ma'am." Alice held out her hand.

"No need for formalities," said my mum who shook Alice's hand warmly.

"Where are Jack and Violet?" I asked Alice.

"We split up to find you."
"You shouldn't have done that." Dodo noted.

"Why not?" I asked.

"The Queen of Hearts is liable to find them." The Dodo's face turned to an evil grin.