Author's Note: My sincerest apologies for the long silence, but I'm finally back. So with no further ado, I'm proud to present the longest chapter yet.

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Chapter 11: Sayonara

"Oh, come on, it'll be fun! It must have been decades since you last went on a reconnaissance mission," Matsumoto had begged with her best pout. "Besides, from what I have heard and seen, you definitely need to get out of the office – filling out paperwork all day simply isn't healthy!"

"You have been working a lot lately, lieutenant – even more than usual..." A shadow had briefly crossed over Kobayashi Miyuki's features, before it was replaced by her usual chirpiness. "What's more, things have been unusually quiet in Soul Society lately, so why not take the opportunity and go before something inevitably happens?"

She had silently cursed the fact that Matsumoto and her own 3rd Seat had joined forces against her. After a tiresome and lengthy discussion, it had become clear that she wouldn't hear the end of it at work or in her spare-time if she refused. But it had annoyed her that both Matsumoto and Kobayashi failed to understand that it simply wasn't necessary for her to go on this mission – neither her particular skills or experiences were crucial, or even required, for its success – and the piles of papers stacked high on her office desk were not going to write themselves... especially not when the mission in question was scheduled to begin as soon as the following day.

"Ah, and don't forget Yamamoto's orders..." Matsumoto's voice had acquired a disturbingly playful, sing-song quality, and Momo had looked at her tall friend with weary anticipation. "I'm in charge of this mission and, therefore, I'm also responsible for the selection of the members of the team. So, congratulations, 5th squad lieutenant and 3rd Seat – I've chosen you."

Matsumoto had grinned a little bit too wide, Miyuki had looked a little bit too pleased, and she had barely resisted the urge to slap her own forehead in frustration. Unfortunately, all that Matsumoto had said were true: the Head-Captain had entrusted the command of the mission to her, she had the right to choose the members of her team...and there was absolutely nothing anyone could do about it. So she had accepted defeat – all that remained had been to resign herself to her fate with as much dignity and defiance as she could.

"If that's the case, then I'll accept... although it is a dubious honour to be chosen." She had been admittedly disappointed when her comment was met with nothing but unfazed calm. "But I'm only agreeing to this because of the Head-Captain's orders and that I'm concerned about the recent hollow sightings. This needs to be thoroughly investigated – it would be irresponsible to ignore it."

"Of course," Matsumoto had nodded in agreement with feigned solemnity before winking at Miyuki, who beamed back at her. "Well, our little mission was a complete success, I'd say."

This time, she hadn't even tried to muffle the loud sigh that escaped from deep inside of her chest. Of course! Why hadn't she suspected anything when Matsumoto had reminisced about her previous outings to the living world with an unusual degree of sentimentality? The acting Captain and the 3rd Seat had obviously planned this from the very moment that the Head-Captain made his announcement. Why had their efforts even surprised her? Really, she should have learned by now...

"Yes, Captain. My apologies, lieutenant, but it seems that it can't be helped." Miyuki had wisely avoided eye-contact with her less-than-amused superior, and had instead skimmed through some papers that were attached to her clipboard. "Well, this must be the second extended mission to the living world this year, and Head-Captain Yamamoto-Genryuusai put 10th Division in charge of this one, too?"

"It's the third mission to be precise. But it makes sense, since reconnaissance is one of our many specialities after all." The acting Captain never missed a chance to praise her squad, and that time hadn't been an exception. "But, Miyuki, I don't know how many times that I've told you to stop with all the formalities – we're all friends here!"

"Yes, Captain." Miyuki had smiled brightly at a disgruntled Matsumoto, who knew better than arguing with the stubborn 3rd Seat. "So, who else did you pick for the mission other than my lieutenant and me?"

"Well, Ikkaku and Yumichika will provide the firepower and blood thirst as usual..."

A slight frown had settled on Matsumoto's face – it was difficult to assemble a reconnaissance team that not only would be a successful combat combination and fit in with the humans if necessary, but whose members could simply get along for the duration of the mission. When her Captain had led the expeditions, Ikkaku, Yumichika, Renji, and Rukia normally joined them – a combination that had worked surprisingly well. But, when she thought about it, had the success of his missions ever been in any real doubt? Captain had always seemed to know exactly what to do... She could only hope to lead their squad half as well as he had. She felt that she owed it to the squad members, whose silent support those first nightmarish days after her 'promotion' had assured her that although he was gone, she was still needed... that she still needed to live. She owed it to Momo, who had gone through hell and back but still, somehow, had managed to retain her sanity. But most of all, she owed it to herself. She would not forget that she was an officer of the Gotei 13, and an officer did not admit defeat to anyone or anything, not even to her own insecurities and fears. Her Captain taught her that, simply by the way that he had lived.

"...but since Kuchiki is keeping Renji busy with something or another, I decided to bring my lieut-... er, well, I decided to bring Shinji on this assignment. It'd be his first reconnaissance mission, but I think-"

"Although he's officially your 3rd Seat, you might as well call him your lieutenant," she had interrupted quietly. "After all, Shinji performs all the duties of one, including a fair share of the paperwork. And... you're not a lieutenant anymore, Matsumoto – you are the Captain of the 10th Division."

Matsumoto had now been acting squad Captain for almost five years, and there had been no signs that she would be replaced. Although she had stubbornly refused to take the Captain Proficiency Test, which she most likely would pass with flying colours, she had unofficially assumed the role of a permanent Captain; lacking any other candidates for her position, this had been deemed to be a satisfactory arrangement that even the Captains had come to tolerate with time.

But the moment Momo had uttered 'Captain of the 10th Division', the hurt in her chest had been undeniable – although she had said it hundreds of times and knew that Matsumoto truly deserved that title, it still felt wrong.

"I'm still just the acting Captain." Matsumoto had looked her in the eye defiantly, but her voice had softened as if she understood her friend's internal struggle. "But yes, I will bring Shinji. I did talk to Shuuhei first, though – Shinji is, after all, his younger brother. But Shuuhei agreed that the mission would provide him with valuable experience." Matsumoto's eyes had suddenly glittered dangerously with ill-masked mischief. "Besides, I think my Shinji's got a sweet spot for a certain 5th Division lieutenant... What do you think, eh, Miyuki?"

"Errrr, C-captain? P-p-perhaps you should, err..." Miyuki's face had assumed an expression of acute desperation, as it cautiously peeked out from behind the safety of the clipboard that she had held in front of her as if to physically shield herself from her lieutenant's inevitable wrath. It was a well-known fact that the once light-hearted Hinamori did not take kindly to even slight, good-natured prodding into her private life, and that her retaliations were swift and ruthless. From the familiar hard look in Hinamori's eyes, Miyuki knew that this time would not be an exception.

"Matsumoto Rangiku! We have talked about this, remember? Or do I need to refresh your memory..." Momo had growled menacingly. As usual, Matsumoto's clumsy implication had not been lost on her, and, contrary to the obvious intent, Momo didn't find it the slightest amusing. Only two people had ever been entrusted with full access to her mind and heart; one had used that privilege to mercilessly rip her to shreds, while the other had searched amid the devastation to save that which could still be saved... It was not a matter to be taken lightly.

"Sorry, Hinamori." The offender in question hadn't been the slightest apologetic – while Matsumoto was fully aware of the fact that Shinji's interests were directed elsewhere, she was pleased that her comments had been met by a reaction. It was her way to attack the protective shields that Momo had raised around her and which she seldom lowered, even for her friends. "But you can't deny that you two do seem really close, and he seems to find himself in your division more often than not, so it's only natural for... errr... um..."

It was the full power of her most icy glare that had finally silenced Matsumoto, who too late realized that the gentle teasing had gone a little bit too far. Words had not been necessary for Momo to make it exceedingly clear that the 10th Division acting Captain had crossed the line and would do best in an immediate retreat before the consequences would really become dire.

"Heh. Er, before I forget, there is one more thing regarding the mission. We're all meeting tomorrow morning at exactly 8 o'clock by the 1st Division building for a last briefing by Yamamoto." Matsumoto had wisely heeded to the warning, and was nervously wiping a bead of sweat from her forehead. "So, don't be late, and... I'll see both of you there." With those words and a wave, Matsumoto had hurried towards an unknown destination in the opposite direction.

Momo had looked after Matsumoto's disappearing figure disapprovingly before turning to her 3rd Seat, "Miyuki, could you please go ahead and inform our squad of our mission tomorrow? Tell them that all training sessions in the living world are suspended until we have completed the investigation, but that all other assignments are to be completed as normal. Tanaka will be left in charge, and if there are any unprecedented problems, he is to report to Captain Ukitake. That's all."

"Yes, lieutenant."

Miyuki had dutifully set off towards the 5th Division, leaving Momo to her own thoughts.

It had been five long years since Shiro died, and yet it had felt as if she had received the horrible news only yesterday... the ache he left behind had not subsided, not that she thought that it ever would, but the unbearable pain had dulled somewhat with time. It had slowly but inevitably become a part of her life, a part of her – she felt it when she opened her eyes in the morning, she felt it when she saw the 10th Division building, she felt it when she drilled her squad and when she filled out her paperwork, she felt it when she walked among the blossoming cherry trees, she felt it when she was on a mission, she felt it when she was among friends, she felt it in her sleep... she felt it each year when autumn slowly yielded to the first signs of winter.

She had stared into the air, absentmindedly stroking his star that was securely fastened on her obi sash next to Tobiume. Its presence soothed her thoughts, and as usual, she felt reassured by its familiar chill. It confirmed that she had survived, if only barely...

"Good afternoon, lieutenant Hinamori!"

She had met the warm grin of the tall 10th Division officer with a nod and a small smile of her own. At the time, Hisagi Shinji had been a relatively new addition to the numbers of higher-ranked shinigami of the Gotei 13, but much like his older brother, he had quickly distinguished himself from among the other seated officers of his division to finally reach the coveted rank of 3rd Seat. He had gradually been entrusted with duties that would normally have been placed on the shoulders of the division lieutenant; but he bore them with pride, a great deal of patience, and with occasional pointers from his more experienced sibling.

"Shinji, I hear that you'll be going on your first reconnaissance mission tomorrow? Congratulations."

"Thank you. Captain finally asked me to come with her. I've never spent such a long period of time in the living world before, but I'm certain that it'll be interesting." Shinji had excitedly nodded his affirmative before a flush briefly settled on his face as he continued, "Um, I just heard that my Captain managed to convince you to join us. So...err, I just wanted to ask...err... about... um... Kobayashi. Will...err... she... um... come, too?"

"Yes, she will, and I think that it's safe to say that her enthusiasm exceeds mine."She had hardly been able to hide her amusement – it had become increasingly apparent that the hopelessly shy Shinji was utterly and desperately enamoured with the oblivious Kobayashi Miyuki.

"Oh, that's good!" the man had beamed at her, completely and blissfully ignorant of the transparency of his crush. But little did he know that most of Seireitei's numerous inhabitants were well aware of his predicament and had been following his progress with much interest.

"It is hardly her first time in the living world, but reconnaissance missions are very different from ordinary soul burial assignments... However, I'm not particularly worried about her – she can hold her own if she has to."

"Yeah, I've seen her train – she's not only a good shinigami, she's also really very pret-" Shinji had caught himself just in time, but was now blushing furiously. "Err, I mean, she's... errr... she's pret-...pret-pretentious! But... um... I mean... err... in a good way. Ahh, confidence in one's skills is important, right, lieutenant? Err... I mean..."

"Shinji."

"Um, yes?"

"This mission will give you two a chance to finally get to know each other a bit better, don't you think?" She had looked up at the flustered Shinji with an innocently neutral expression on her face, while, inside, her stomach had squirmed uneasily as a familiarly bitter-sweet sensation washed over her. Although she had approved of Shinji and genuinely wished him all the luck in Soul Society in his pursuit of Miyuki, she found it difficult to... She hadn't even been able to pinpoint the nature of her uneasiness, which stabbed at her heart. Was it jealousy? Sadness? Regret? She didn't know, nor did she want to dwell on it – she had feared that it would hurt too much. There were some wounds before which even time stood powerless... and she had so many.

"Ahh, I don't... Ehh... Err... Umm... I'll see you tomorrow morning, lieutenant." Shinji had tried, and spectacularly failed, to hold on to what little dignity he had left.

--

Hollows had closed in on them from all sides until they were completely surrounded. Fortunately, the confrontation had taken place on an abandoned field some distance way from Karakura Town itself, which considerably lessened the possibilities of human casualties. She had quickly deduced that the hollows were of sub-menos level, which meant that they theoretically should be relatively easy to overpower. But she had still been deeply concerned about the situation; while the most pressing danger hadn't been their destructive powers, the sheer numbers worried her. How could there be so many?

The sudden turn of events, which had taken place only hours after their arrival in the living world, was hardly the "fun" that Matsumoto had promised her. She remembered how she had wondered what that hell Kurosaki could have been doing for the situation to be so out of control.

Kurosaki Ichigo, the orange-haired shinigami representative.

She had been one of the few senior officers that had never met him in person, but she knew the stories about his frightening potential and remarkable proficiency in battle – not to speak of his odd assembly of friends: a Quincy, a girl with healing powers that were said to rival even Captain Unohana, and a quiet man possessing incredible strength. Rumours had it that these humans had fought Aizen's arrancar and hollows while battle raged in Soul Society, but the full extent of their efforts had remained unknown to everyone except for the Captains, of course.

However, regardless of their exact role in the conflict, she was touched by their courage – Kurosaki may have been a shinigami representative, but he was first and foremost human, as were the others. It was as humans that they had risked their lives to defend their world and they had, if only by extension, also helped to save Soul Society. But even more importantly, Kurosaki and his friends had fought Aizen for the right to that which was theirs. They had fought for their homes, their families and friends, and for their freedom. She understood what that meant, possibly better than anyone.

Kurosaki Ichigo, Ishida Uryuu, Inoue Orihime, Yasutora Sado. She had hoped that she would finally get the opportunity to meet them. However, it had been obvious that her first meeting with the humans wouldn't be during that particular battle – the orange-haired youth and his friends had been nowhere to be seen. But judging from the magnitude of the mess, it had seemed likely that they were detained elsewhere with problems of their own.

One particular thought had troubled her as she stared at the despicable horde of hollows: what could have attracted so many to Karakura Town, and why had they gathered in this particular place? Hollows normally entered the living world to feed, so something powerful must have drawn them to this desolate place.

"This is such an ugly situation," Yumichika had wailed, nervously fussing over his decorative feathers. "What if one of these beasts dares to scratch me... Oh, my beautiful face!"

"EH? Who CARES?! Come on!" Ikkaku had roared in anticipation of a good fight, sweat glistening on his bald head.

"Yeah, let's go! What are we waiting for?" Shinji had tried his best to sound convincingly manly, while casting an expectant glance in Miyuki's general direction.

"Quiet, everyone, and don't be so reckless! We can't throw ourselves into battle like a bunch of idiots – we need a plan!" Miyuki had yelled over the commotion, blissfully ignorant of the disappointed look in Shinji's eyes. "Any thoughts, lieutenant?!"

"Um..." She had felt how four pairs of eyes fell on her, expectantly awaiting her instructions.

"I hate to pull rank on you," Matsumoto had interrupted her just as one of the hollows separated itself from the rest and lunged forward with a bloodcurdling screech, but only to disintegrate midair after the acting Captain's swift and decisive blow with Haineko. "But let's just do what it takes to clear up this mess and to stay alive!"

"Understood!"

She had unsheathed Tobiume and in the corner of her eye, she saw that the others had done the same. The shinigami had waited for the highest-ranking officer to give the order, and when it finally came, six commands had pierced the air.

"Growl, Haineko!"

"Spread your poison, Shinkou Muchitsujo!"

"Grow, Houzukimaru!"

"Bloom, Fuji Kujaku!"

"Snap, Tobiume!"

"Shriek and shiver, Junseiuindo!"

--

The battle had been more difficult and longer than anticipated, and the magnitude of the resulting devastation was considerable. She remembered that she had wondered just how the humans in Karakura Town explained the mysterious destruction that seemed to haunt their city. But she hadn't been overly concerned – when the battle finally came to an end, they had all still been alive.

"Listen up, everyone, this is important." Matsumoto had brushed a bloodstained lock of hair away from her face before she continued, "Urahara has prepared our gigai, which are waiting for us at the store. We will meet with Ichigo and the others tomorrow, and they can hopefully tell us more about the situation. Miyuki?"

"Yes, Captain. However, until we have gathered more information about the rise in hollow attacks, we are not to interact with other humans beyond that which is necessary." Miyuki had dutifully continued to relay the Head-Captain's instructions. She had sheathed Junseiuindo, while miraculously producing her clipboard from somewhere in her frazzled robes. "Then, our orders are to integrate into society as transfer students at Kurosaki Ichigo's school."

"Yeah, yeah, we know – no playing with the humans yet." Ikkaku had rubbed his soot-covered head in annoyance, while donning a bored expression. "But let's go. I'm hungry and it looks like it's gonna start raining."

"Yes, could we go, please? I need to rid this-this mucus from my person immediately!" Yumichika had looked down on his robes, which were covered in a sickly purple liquid, and his normally serene face had been contorted with disgust. "It burns my delicate skin... just look at me! I-I look... ugly!!"

"Alright, come on." Matsumoto had led the procession, supporting the weight of a heavily limping Shinji. He had a deep gash in his left leg, the result of an attack that had not been meant for him but for the petite 3rd Seat of Squad 5. In the confusion of battle, he had seen that particular hollow in the corner of his eye, panicking when Miyuki hadn't seemed to sense the danger. The beast had been about to strike her from behind when he roughly pushed her aside – while she had escaped its razor sharp claws, he hadn't been so lucky. But despite of the pain, he had gritted his teeth and continued to fight – he had protected her, and that had been reason enough for him to continue.

Just as she had prepared to follow the others, a sudden movement from under some nearby trees had caught her attention. She had immediately thought that the shadowy figure had belonged to a hollow, but something had prevented her from destroying it with a simple but destructive kidou spell. The shadow had not attacked, but slowly and carefully retreated in the opposite direction. When she looked closer, she had drawn a sigh of relief, glad that she hadn't unleashed her kidou expertise on the unknown figure. Although the shape had been partially hidden by the trees – judging from its height and size – she had been fairly certain that it belonged to a human male.

At a closer inspection, she concluded that her initial guess had been correct. But she had merely shaken her head; the poor man must have borne witness to at least some of the, to him, unexplainable destruction. But there was nothing she could do – he couldn't see her, and even if he could, how could she possibly explain the battle, her torn, blood-soaked black robes, and the zanpakutou by her side?

But to her surprise, the man had suddenly stopped backing away and had seemed to look right at her. This had given her a chance to inspect him more closely: he seemed quite ordinary for human standards. As far as she could tell, he was of average height with black hair. But before he had turned around and finally disappeared among the trees, she had noticed one feature which differentiated him from all the humans, hollows, pluses, arrancar, and shinigami she had ever seen – save for one.

His eyes were perfectly emerald.

The air had suddenly felt nauseatingly thick, and her breathing had become laboured. Despite of the distance between her and the human, she had seen those eyes, those painfully beautiful eyes, alight with life. She had seen eyes like those only once before.

Something wet had trickled down her cheeks, collecting at her jaw line before falling to the ground, and she had raised her shaking hands to her face in wonder.

Were those tears? Was she the one crying?

Until that moment, she hadn't allowed herself to cry. She hadn't shed any tears, not even once, since his death. But when she saw those eyes, a chink had appeared on her iron-clad resolve, and, for every passing second, the rift had grown until there was nothing left to stop her eyes from watering.

She had been afraid of tears, contemptuously discarding them as signs of weakness. But as she stood there, alone and shielding her face with her hands, she had not felt helpless – no, she had felt as if she had recovered something important, something that she had given up as long lost. It had felt as if a weight had slowly begun to lift from the depths of her soul – she had carried her unshed tears for so very long.

Then she had raised her face towards the darkening heavens, whispering, "Sayonara."

Goodbye.

As that lone word left her lips, the skies had begun to cry with her – heavy water drops had hit her face until salty tears and rain became one. While she had since long accepted that he was dead, that acceptance had felt strangely incomplete, as if there was something more, something she had missed. It had not been until she regained the courage to cry that she had understood what that was.

She never said goodbye to him.

Yes, it was first when she stood in the rain that she finally brought herself to bid him farewell. But that goodbye had not signalled an end to her grief – no, she could never lock him away in a little box to gather dust with all of her other memories. No, the knot in her stomach would never quite unravel, nor would the merciless gnawing at her heart ever cease to haunt her. The hurt would never disappear because she was incomplete without him, her dearest friend.

Instead, her goodbye had been a promise never to forget.


So, let me introduce Shinji! I decided to make him Hisagi Shuuhei's younger brother, since I hoped that the relation would anchor him in the story a little bit better than merely introducing him as Matsumoto's lieutenant/ 3rd Seat. Also, when I mention Shinji's rise among the seated officers, I play on the fact that Shuuhei is a bit of a shinigami prodigy himself. I was trying to avoid a super-talented original character that suddenly comes out of nowhere to save the day, by suggesting (by simple association) that the talent could run in the fictional family. Did I come close to succeeding? I honestly don't know.

I hope you liked the chapter :)

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.