AN: Thank you so much for reading this story. Your reviews make me so happy.

Reviews and story recs for The Little Pink House are appreciated greatly!

Five year old girls are tough. It is like a preview for when she turns sixteen. God help me.

Disclaimer: (Because, I keep forgetting to add it) I don't own the Twilight characters, but I do own the actions of Annie and Matt. I live through them every single, tiring day.

Chapter 11

The package the man placed in Bella's hand was moving and whimpering.

"What is this thing?" She exclaimed.

"Lady, I need you to sign for this thing." The delivery man wanted to get rid of the package and fast. He didn't get paid enough to deal with this bullshit. The guy who decided that live creature delivery was a good idea was an asshole.

Bella was annoyed. "I certainly didn't order anything that needs air holes. I think you have the wrong house, Mister."

"Are you Isabella Swan?" The man gruffly asked, rubbing his bushy, gray beard.

"Yes."

"Since that's your name, lady, it's your package." The man scratched over the top of his brown baseball hat. It was almost lunchtime and all he wanted was a juicy hamburger, fries and tall glass of cool ice tea from his favorite waitress, Cora. Instead, here he stood arguing with an irate woman with crazy hair and an oversized tee shirt that read, My Kid Is an Elmo-rific reader. That ugly shirt even had a giant sized head of that annoying red monster on it. His granddaughter loved that stupid thing. He would have laughed at someone actually choosing to wear such a dumb thing, if he wasn't so damned hungry.

The package barked.

Bella gasped, "Do not tell me that thing made the sound I think it did."

"If you meant the bark, Ma'am, then yes that would be the sound." That did make the man laugh.

"Take it back! I am serious about this! What you are witnessing here is my serious face." Bella screwed up her face in what she hoped was an intimidating scowl.

The man had to chuckle again through the growl of his stomach. This lady was a nut. "There's a note."

Bella grabbed an envelope out of his hand and ripped it open. She brought out a notecard that read:

Dearest Empress of Crazy and Grand Dame of Sluts,

This I bestow on you is a simple gift of distraction to keep your mind off my idiotic brother and demented Father's fuckery. I will be thinking of you as you clean up more than just young Matt's poop.

Toodles Pumpkin,

Jane

Jane was going to die. Bella would gladly admit to the murder, because if anyone who knew the dearly departed Jane testified concerning her evil, not a jury would even contemplate sending Bella to the big house.

"Oh gosh fudge it!" Bella cursed in her not actually cursing way. "I'll sign for the dang box!"

"There's four more in the truck."

Her eyes widened in fear at his statement, her thoughts going towards more barking madness. "You mean there are more of those wiggling things? I swear if there is some sort of malignant demon in this thing, I am suing your company for millions. I will own your donkey!"

"I have no idea what you are talking about. Are you cussing at me?" The man looked at her in confusion.

"Yes, sir, I am. My kids could be hiding anywhere. It's almost lunch, so they'll be creeping around looking for cheese products any minute."

"Ha, right, gotcha, I've got kids and grandkids myself." The man started to feel kind of bad for this frazzled and crazed woman. Children will do that to you. "I don't think you have to worry about those boxes, Ma'am, there ain't any holes in them. I'll just put the boxes on the porch for you."

Bella sighed in resignation and signed for the box. She headed inside holding the wiggling box as she attempted not to drop it. Bella placed it onto the floor in the entryway and slowly opened it, her heart filled with worry. A furry, little black thing jumped out and licked her face. It was disgusting. Bella let out a scream.

Annie came out running. "Mommy, you got me a puppy!"

Bella blanched. Bella Marie Swan was not a dog person.

"No, baby, we aren't keeping it. Aunt Jane thinks she's funny..."

"I have always wanted a puppy!" Annie exclaimed with an exuberance, which pierced her mother's eardrums.

Bella looked at her daughter with a skeptical look. "I thought you wanted a pony?"

"Oh no, Mommy, I've always wanted a dog!" Annie announced quickly. She actually had wanted a pony, but wasn't going to admit it now that a puppy was within her reach.

"What about all the begging for a kitten?"

Annie put her hands on her small hips and frowned. "It was puppy."

This might have been considered a small fib in Annie's mind. In actuality, Annie drove Bella insane about getting a kitten. Once Annie's friend, Sophie got a one, it was all Bella heard about. Fortunately for Bella, but unfortunately for young Sophie, little girl had gotten scratched. After witnessing her friend's pain, Annie was done with the kitten talk.

Bella sighed as Matt wandered in and started pointing and panting at the dog. He quickly dropped to his knees and started barking at the black monster that was chewing on Bella's rug. The monster jumped on young Matty's back, causing a crying Matt to scale his mommy's body like a mountain. The small beast started bouncing on Bella's leg.

"Mommy, isn't he so much fun?" Annie asked with a squeal. Bella thought her oldest child was going slightly mad.

Bella put Matt on the top of a medium sized cabinet and looked at the dog who sat at her feet. Its tongue hung out making it look dopey or drunk. "What am I going to do with you?"

"He can play in my room!" Annie started to do a little dance.

Bella gave her a look. "The way you are dancing around makes it look like you have to pee, kiddo."

"No, Mommy, I am just happy!" She stopped abruptly, looking down and screwing up her nose. "I think Pudding needed to."

Bella looked down at the yellow puddle at her feet. "Oh come on! You have got to be kidding me!"

"It's like when you are trying to potty train Matt and he runs around the house naked. Remember when he kept peeing on the floor and you said he would figure out the potty before he goes to big kid school." Annie grinned at her mother as she related the story, which she felt was the best story ever. Well the best story for that day, because it included her brother peeing in the house. "I bet the puppy will figure it out too."

Bella sighed and looked up at the sky, before scooping up the pulsating fur ball, which was nibbling her ear with sharp needle teeth. She quickly took it and deposited it into a bathtub.

Annie had followed her in to the bathroom. "Can I call Sam and let him see my puppy?"

"No."

"But, Mom..." Annie whined.

There was a yell and a whimper. Bella had left Matt on the top of the cabinet.

"I'm coming Matty! Don't move, baby!" Bella tore down the hallway, followed closely by Annie to the sounds of a barking mutt in the bathtub.

Somehow, Matt was hanging upside down. His little head hung over the edge of the cabinet and he screamed bloody murder.

Bella picked up her baby, who she assumed was trying out the life of a bat. Annie giggled laughing watching her mother struggle with a now howling Matt. For the life her, Bella had no clue what his problem was now. She had just rescued him, for goodness sake's!

"I think he wants to go back there, Mommy!" Annie squealed. "Put him back right now!"

"I have a better idea. Go to your room and read a book," Bella said with gritted teeth.

Annie stomp her foot. "I do not want to go to my room. I do not want to read a book."

"Would you like some green eggs and ham?" Bella inquired, trying to summon her inner Dr. Seuss.

"What?" Annie asked in confusion. Obviously, Annie didn't get Bella's attempt at humor for small children.

Matt started to wail louder, Annie laughed harder and the monster yapped in a frenzy that drove Bella to near hysterics. Alice had entered carrying her bag of supplies and dropped them onto the floor. She knew that at the best of times it was bedlam in the house, but that was okay. Alice was used to it and was comfortable with the chaos. This was a different animal all together, since it appeared that there was an actual animal making awful noises down the hall.

"Bella, what happened?" Alice asked with worry. Her friend had never seemed this level of frazzled.

"Motherhood, Alice, motherhood."

It took about another hour for things to calm down. Alice took over the children, fixing them grilled cheese and making them calm down with the efficiency of a Drill Sargent, but the sweetness of a doting aunt. Bella felt blessed that Alice was a part of her life. She just wished that she could help Alice see how wonderful she was. Bella knew she needed to have patience to bring the young lady out of her shell; unfortunately being patient wasn't her strong suit.

The dog had stopped barking. It was now passed out at the bottom of the tub.

Bella dialed her phone with determination.

"I had been waiting for your call, Isabella…Isabella...Isabella..." Jane sang out in an operatic fashion.

Bella frowned into the phone. "What they H, E, double hockey sticks is your problem, you demented sea monkey?"

"I always get a thrill hearing your pretty words, Slutty. Did you like my gift?"

"I am right now thinking about how many different ways I can murder you, Jane. Unfortunately, nothing is standing out as painful enough." Bella's fingers gripped the phone.

Jane laughed. "Oh Crazy, I expected nothing less of you. You have to admit my intentions were good."

"Your attempt to drive me even more insane is considered helpful?"

"It was an added bonus, but really I thought the kids need a pick me up after being the children of Alec," Jane said.

"Where is Alec?"

"He's still driving the French insane with his horrible accent. We don't have to worry about his sorry ass for a few weeks," Jane stated, making Bella sigh in relief. "Don't relax yet, Ho Bag, Dad's been working on my mother."

"Oh fudge! Jane, how did that happen? They hate each other!"

Those two had a horrible marriage. Aro and Maria had a very loving public facade, but the truth was far more warped. In front of family and friends, it was threats and the yelling of insults. Bella remembered a time where Maria was so incensed by her husband's toxic words, that she stabbed Aro with a fork at Christmas dinner. The idea of the two of them working together was a frightening possibility.

"Mommy dearest, originally saw his twisted reasoning and rejected it. However, the idea of her sweet grandchildren and, I gagged when she said this, darling daughter-in-law being back in the fold was way too much temptation." Bella blanched when Jane said this.

Bella asked tentatively, "You're still on my side, right?"

"Oh you, insane harpy, of course I am. We might even be considered friends, if I didn't find you intensely annoying."

"Or if I didn't find you intensely evil." Bella couldn't stand Jane, but she would miss her if she wasn't around.

"How's pretty, little Alice?" Jane asked randomly.

Bella rolled her eyes into the phone. "You've never met her."

"I'm bored, Hells Bells, let me meet her!" Jane giggled. Bella could imagine her maniacal smile. "I want a new friend!"

"Alice is not a lesbian, Spawn of the Underworld." Bella just shook her head at Jane and her crazy. Jane must have broken up with the latest girl of the week. Bella sarcastically added, "How nice to see that you want to come visit your niece and nephew."

"I want to see them," Jane said dismissively. "I just want to meet your new buddy. I bet I could get her to see a new side of things. I could get you into bed if the idea didn't make me want to vomit."

"Dream on, Succubus, the idea of that makes me want to jump off a cliff." Bella shuddered at any thought of her ever being with Jane. It wasn't an issue with Jane being a lesbian. It was an issue of Jane being Jane.

Jane chuckled and then stopped abruptly. "Hey, it's too quiet over there. Where's the puppy? I expect ear piercing yapping to drive you nuts!"

"The mutt is sleeping in the bathtub."

"She's a beautiful, little Black Lab. She is going to be huge, by the way, have you seen those paws?" Jane giggled evilly. "What do you mean, she's in the bathtub? I sent you a crate, a bed, bowls..."

"Are those the things in the boxes? They're still on the front porch." I played with the cord. "You've got a problem with that?"

"Yes, you lazy piece of shit, get going and set her things up!" Jane exclaimed.

Bella heard the door open and that crazy puppy started howling. Edward called out, "Bella, where are you? What's that horrible noise?"

"That's Edward; I need to wrap up this call. I'm sending that D.S back to you, Underworld Vixen."

Jane snickered, "That's right, go running to Lover Boy. Wait what does D.S. stand for?"

"Dip S. H. I. T. I named it after you. Ciao!" Bella hung up the phone with a chuckle, cutting off Jane's stammering of nonsense.

Bella put the phone down and heard nothing but silence. What happened to the dog? She quietly tiptoed to the bathroom thinking the dog fell asleep again. Bella guessed she should empty all the boxes with the dog accessories. The dog would probably prefer a bed to sleeping in the tub. Oh great, more stuff to gather dust in the house. She was mentally complaining about this fact as she entered the bathroom to find the dog...gone.

She tore out of the room at a brisk pace, holding onto the hope that the fur ball was not pooping on the couch. No dog. Bella rushed into the kitchen, imagining it was tearing through the trash. No dog. The living room held no sign of a mutt chewing cords. The shoes were safe in the mud room. Where, oh where, could that fluffy slobber monster be?

Then she heard him, Mr. Smooth, Edward Cullen simpering in Annie's bedroom. "Aren't you the sweetest thing ever?"

Edward was cuddling the puppy.

Annie was cuddled into Edward's other side, petting the puppy's head gently. Matt perched on top of Alice's lap, as she sat on the floor. Matt's tiny fingers weaved through Alice's short hair, the two of them smiling. The sight made Bella's heart fill with joy that her little family of three was growing with new members.

"Do you love the puppy that Aunt Janie got us, Prince?" Annie asked with a beautiful smile.

Edward smiled and looked down at Annie. "I do! What are we naming her?"

"We are naming her, It. It's going back to Aunt Jane." Bella gave her most intimidating look.

"Mommy, I love her!" Annie cried. "Why are you so mean?"

Bella looked at her with a disapproving look. "Baby, I can't take care of a dog right now. Mommy has to work and take care of you and Matt. I wish we could keep her, but we can't."

"I am not a baby!" Annie yelled, making Matt cover his ears. "You don't love me anymore!"

"Annie, stop! You will always be my baby and I will always love you, but we really can't keep her. It's too much."

"I'll help take care of her!" Edward exclaimed. He loved dogs. Esme, bless her heart, always wanted to get him one. Unfortunately, she was always too busy like Bella to care for a pet. Carlisle was always at the hospital and she was running to and from a myriad of charities. Edward looked at Alice. She loved animals, too. "I bet Ali would like to help."

"Oh, I would! It would be fun." Alice gave her sweet smile, which was becoming much more frequent. It made Bella extremely happy, which helped her make her decision.

"Okay, we'll keep the mut...dog, but there is going to be a lot of rules." Bella looked at the group of grinning faces, solemnly. "First, Miss Annie, you are going to need a major attitude adjustment. It's not okay to whine and yell to get what you want."

"Mommy likes to drink wine, not listen to it," Annie parroted, what her mother muttered often.

Edward laughed at Bella. What a pretty, but odd duck. "Only you would say something like that, Bella. Where did you get that shirt? It needs to be burned."

"You have a problem with a giant Elmo head?"

"It's rather frightening." Edward took her hand and kissed it. Annie's eyes growing wide and mischievous. "I find you fetching anyway."

Bella looked at him and wondered how a man could be so charming and if there was anything hidden behind those lovely, green eyes.

This thought distracted her and before Bella even noticed what she was doing, scooped up the puppy and started petting it. Maybe, this would work out after all. Then the beast bit her finger. Then again, it might not.

XXXXXX

The afternoon was spent watching Annie, Matt and Alice frolicking with the puppy in the yard. This was mostly, Annie and Matt running away, screaming from puppy teeth. Alice was, happily, chasing them all.

Bella and Edward sat in lawn chairs, drinking lemonade. It was nice. It was comfortable. It felt like it was the way it always should have been.

"Why did your ex sister-in-law send you a dog?" Edward asked. He was tired of guessing why his girl looked so stressed lately.

"It was one of those, my family is fudging up your life again, so let me be an even bigger witch that starts with a B. Here's a dog!"

"I love the way you try to protect innocent ears with your curse words substitutions." He put his hand on her neck and massaged it slowly. "Is this about Alec and his neglectful parenting?"

"Nope, it's about getting Bella and her little ones back into the fold. Let's make her a Stepford Wife again." Bella hated to involve him in this. For most men, it would be a deal breaker.

Edward Cullen wasn't like most men. "You remarry that douc...I mean dirt bag, over my dead body."

"I am not planning to remarry Alec, Edward. I had to get my lawyer involved in this mess. They are planning on using my babies, like a bunch of jerks. Aro Volturi is using getting full custody for Alec, as a threat. Jane is just trying to help me. I'm not too worried; Mr. Jenks is going to be in my corner, so it will be fine."

"Why would she do that?" Edward was very hesitant to trust that Jane woman. Bella had never said anything favorable about her.

Bella sighed and took his other hand in his. "There are many reasons, I guess. Jane hates most of her family. She loves to hate me. Maybe, she likes my tush. Jane and I have a very odd thing going, but it works. I am grateful she's trying to help."

Edward would remain skeptical. Then he realized what she said about her lawyer. "Mr. Jenks is Jason Jenks, correct? That guy is small potatoes! My dad has a whole slew of aggressive and talented lawyers. You'll use them."

"You will not get Esme and Carlisle involved. Mr. Jenks is wonderful."

Edward rolled his eyes. The whole Cullen family was going to get involved. There was no way that they would be losing Bella and her children. They were far too important.

A voice rang out, before Edward could protest. "Bella, are you out back?"

Jacob "Playboy" Black walked through the gate confidently, holding a small box. Edward scowled at the muscle bound creep. He was a good doctor, but almost all his doctor colleagues knew that Jacob was all about dating mothers. Edward was amazed that Jacob still had patients the way he went through the ladies.

Jacob smiled his glistening pearly whites at Bella, as she stood to greet him. "Hi there, these are for you."

"Hey, Jacob, what are you doing here?" Bella asked curiously. She looked at the box and gave a tight smile. "It's a box of chocolates, oh great, thanks."

Edward laughed loudly, as Bella quickly chucked them on her seat. Edward was given a glare by Jacob. Jacob spat, "Cullen."

"Black," Edward returned.

Jacob smiled back at Bella. "Annie invited me, remember?"

"Right," Bella said simply.

Jacob grinned again, making Bella stare at those crazy, white teeth. Does he bleach those things?

The dog started to bark and Jacob smiled again, saying, "You got a dog! Take me to meet him."

He pulled a startled Bella towards the dog. Before Edward could protest, Annie ran over and pulled his arm. "Prince, you need to duel Dr. Black."

"What are you talking about, princess?" Edward was confused about where Annie was going with this.

Annie put her hands on her hips in frustration. "You need to win Mommy away from the knight."

"Dr. Black is no knight." A repugnant, womanizer would be a more accurate description.

"Sure, he is, Prince. He's a black knight!" Annie clapped her hands in excitement and skipped off. Edward starred after her.

Jacob Black, the Black Knight.

Annie was a little sneak with a flair for the dramatic, but Edward adored her. That was without a doubt.