A/N: I know there are a few faithful readers out there who are really enjoying this story, but I would like to know what people think. I know I have slowed down the updates (you can thank the holidays for that). This is another long chapter. Let me know what you think! Happy Reading!
Alicia felt nervous, she was sitting on her daughter's bed. She couldn't stop the start of tears as she looked at her daughter. A product of her and Will. She had released Owen of watching her kids and put him on the task of making sure that Peter didn't kill Will. She glanced at Zach, who was fiddling with his phone. She wanted him here so he could hear what she had to say. She knows that they would have similar yet different reactions to this news. Her mind kept swirling with thoughts until Grace's voice brought her back, "Mom, are you okay?"
She shook her head, her stomach churning at the thought of what she was about to do. "I need to talk to the two of you about something important."
"You and dad are getting divorced. We kind of already figured that out." Zach said with a shrug. "We want you to be happy."
Alicia sat there, her shocked gaze darting back and forth between her kids. "Well, we are separated, but we haven't discussed divorce yet." She spoke softly, still in a state of shock. "That's not what I wanted to talk about." Her chest hurt and she didn't know how she could protect them from this. This was her error, her fault. "Well, as we know, Grace, you may need a transplant. We have all been tested and the results are in."
She watched as they both nodded. She started fidgeting with her hands, wondering if she was approaching this subject the best way possible. She didn't want to hurt them with this new news but she knew that it needed to be confessed.
"I asked Dr. Leavitt about what makes a match. He said it consists of a blood match and a match of antibodies. And there are varying degrees to a match. I'm only a slight match, whereas Zach isn't a match." She smiled weakly, but forged on. "But something else that Dr. Leavitt told me is that both parents are usually matches—at different degrees." She paused, reaching over to the chair, pulling the folder back to her with a shaky hand. She was trying to give them time to absorb what she has said. "Dr. Leavitt also ran another test on Peter's sample in comparison with yours, Grace." Alicia looked down at Grace who looked confused, then at Zach who seemed to already connect the dots. She moved closer to Grace, holding the paper in her hand. "These are the results. The top data is Peter's, the middle is yours. And the bottom is an overlap of both. This shows that there are no alleles in common."
At that moment, everything clicked. "Dad… Dad…isn't…my…dad?" Alicia heard Grace whisper each word in horrified shock. "Mom! How…how..what?" she stuttered as she started to cry.
Alicia wrapped her an arm around her and held her daughter. Alicia motioned for Zach to come onto the bed, after a moment he did. Her heart felt like it was bleeding from all the pain she has cause her children. She stayed there, huddled on the bed with her children. Grace continued to cry and Alicia saw the evil darting stares that he was shooting her way. It was several minutes later when Grace had calmed down, Zach was the one to voice the silent question. "You cheated on dad."
But before she could respond, Grace looked up at her, with red puffy eyes, "Who…who is my dad?" her voice quiet.
Alicia looked down at Grace, who had tears welling in her eyes again. Alicia's heart ached knowing that she was the reason for this pain. She couldn't decide if she should just tell her or explain. She decided to let her decide. "I can tell you who, if you want me to. If you don't want to know, that's fine too. It's up to you Grace."
"Who?" She whispered.
Alicia sighed, she wished there was an easier way of presenting this to her. She wrapped her arms tighter around her daughter as she exhaled. "Your father is Will." She closed her eyes not wanting to see the disappointment in her children's eyes. She felt Grace tense in her arms. She opened her eyes when she felt a hand pushing her abdomen. She looked down at Grace, who was crying again and started slapping Alicia in the abdomen, screaming. Repeatedly.
"Grace." Alicia whispered, threading a hand through her hair. It wasn't until Grace slapped her hand away that she saw how hurt her daughter was.
"Leave! I don't want to talk to you. Or see you!" Alicia physically flinched from Grace's words as she felt tears streaming down her face. Her heart clenching. Alicia moved off the bed, glancing to see Zach moving onto the bed to hold Grace. Alicia walked out of the room in a fog. Her heart raced so fast that she moved her hand over her heart, hoping to calm it down.
The tears kept flowing as she realized just how much pain she inflicted on her daughter. Of course Grace was upset at her and furiously yelling at her. Alicia could hear Grace's voice echoing in her head. Leave. I don't want to talk to you. Or see you! She heard ringing in her head like a broken record, stuck on the same groove. Saying the same thing. She leant against the wall, still holding her hand over her heart as she crumbles to the ground. She tries to take in a breath, but finds it increasingly difficult. She starts to feel as though she's suffocating. Leave! I don't want to talk to you! She buried her face in her hands and allowed herself to finally break down. She just let everything pour out of her. The tears flowed from all the pain that she has caused the people she loves. The pain that Grace and Will have to go through to gain a relationship, a bond that they should have had a long time ago. The pain that she caused Zach, probably changing his perception of her because of what has been revealed. And even the pain that she caused Peter. Her body tenses as she recalls the pain and anguish that she went through when she found out that he slept with Kalinda. She wept for the amount of pain that she has caused the people she loves.
She didn't realize how much time had passed by until she felt as hand on her shoulder. She looked up with a tear-stained face. She looked at the person and could see the pain in his eyes, but she was surprised to also see concern there too. She watched as he kneeled next to her, "Grace wants to ask you some questions." Zach took as seat next to her and leant against the wall.
Alicia turned to look at her son. "You and I will set time aside to talk and I'll answer your questions, okay? You and Grace are my priorities." When she saw a ghost of a smile on Zach's face, she leaned in to kiss his temple and stood.
She stood at the door, looking through the little window at her daughter. She suddenly looked so mature and grown-up. When did this happen? She thought. She had felt guilty about what had occurred but now as she looked at her teenage daughter through the window, she couldn't help but feel happy. She quietly opened the door. "Grace," she started, "Zach said you had some questions for me."
"Come on in mom."
She walked in and stood at the foot of her bed, afraid to scare her again to want her to leave. She let the ball stay in Grace's court, allowing her to call the shots. Alicia knew that she owed her that and so much more. Her nerves started to get the best of her, afraid at the thought that her daughter may end up hating her because of all this. She could see the tear tracks on her daughter's cheeks, which surely matched her own.
"I'm sorry mom. I didn't mean to behave like that."
Alicia's heart broke a little bit more. "Grace, sweetie, you had every reason to behave that way. I can't say that it didn't hurt, but you just found out life altering news." Alicia said as she moved to the chair.
"Did you know all along?"
Alicia watched as her daughter's eyes flickered to her, then back to her lap. "No. I just found out a few hours ago myself." She whispered, casting her eyes down.
Grace tilted her head to the side, resting it on the pillow. "Can I ask you a question?"
Alicia smiled softly, "Anything."
She watched as Grace closed her eyes, "Can you tell me how…how…you and Will…" She struggled to get out.
Alicia rested her hand on Grace's forearm, "Of course, but why the sudden 180?"
"Zach was telling me how nice Will was when you three were waiting for me to come out of surgery." Grace shrugged. "He said he wished Will could have been his father."
Alicia was speechless hearing what Grace was saying. She didn't know how to respond to that. She was astonished that just Zach saying that much to her, convinced her to change her behavior and to be open minded. Alicia gathered herself together. "So you want to hear the story?" Leaning her elbows onto he knees.
Grace nodded and moved over in bed as a silent invitation for her mother to join her.
Alicia got settled next to Grace, an arm wrapped around her shoulders, "Where do you want me to begin?"
"From the beginning." She smiled slightly.
Alicia smiled and started off. "We met at Georgetown. We were best friends. But by graduation, we were barely speaking. Peter didn't like that I was friends with Will, and Will didn't like that I was engaged to Peter. So after graduation, Peter and I moved here, to Chicago. Both busy with jobs and planning the wedding that neither Will nor I tried to resurrect our friendship. Fast forward three year after that, Zach was born, I was trying to juggle being a mom and a professional. Peter and I started arguing and fighting over whether I should work or not. I wanted to continue working, I love the law and I didn't want to quit. I wanted to compromise. There was a day where Peter and I were out having a late lunch because he was waiting for a jury verdict to return. He ended up being summoned back to the courthouse in the middle of our meal. To my surprise, Will was at the same restaurant with a client that he was helping out here. He sat down with me and we got to talking, catching up and I realized how much I missed him. So when he went back to Baltimore, we started to rekindle our friendship. We started speaking on the phone occasionally. We even wrote a few letters back and forth. Well in January, Peter got angry when he saw the phone bill. He cornered me in the kitchen, demanding that I tell him who I was calling in Baltimore. Well, I left when he started telling me who I wasn't allowed to be friends with. I went out for a drive." She smiled weakly. "I ended up in the parking garage by my work. So I wandered to the bar down the street."
"You went to a bar, to think?" Grace laughed.
Alicia rolled her eyes. "Probably not the best place but a park wasn't an option in January. I ended up sitting next to this drunk couple who seem to be catching up with friends. The woman bumped into me when she was leaving; the man who arrived a while after had apologized for her. When I realized I recognized the voice, I had looked over—and there was Will. He had just arrived in town for his family holiday celebration. His mom moved out here several years ago." Alicia paused when she felt her shirt become damp, looking down, she saw Grace crying. "Hey, sweetie. I can stop if it's too much." She watched as Grace shook her head. Alicia slid her hand under her daughter's chin. "I'm so sorry about this sweetheart." She heard Grace ask her to continue, so she did. "Will and I spent the rest of the night talking, catching up. He had called the house two days later, inviting me to his family's holiday celebration. I went with him once when we were at Georgetown. I told Peter that I needed a night off and that I was going to Owen's. "
Grace had become quiet as Alicia continued. Now that Alicia paused, she could tell that Grace was thinking. She always had this look on her face, trying to sort things out in her mind. Nothing like Will's poker face.
"Did you love him?"
"Do I love Peter?" Alicia asked, confused.
Grace's head dipped down, when she mumbled. "No, Will. Did you love Will?"
Alicia looked down at her daughter, hearing those words come from her mouth wanted to make her cry. She searched for stability all her life, overlooking an important aspect of life: love. "Yes, I did." She sighed. "There are a lot more stories here and there over the years about Will and I, and I will share them with you eventually. I don't think right now is the right time." She breathed, feeling Grace nod against her.
"One more question."
"Anything, sweetheart."
"Can you tell me about Will?"
Alicia sat there stunned, she felt as though a ton of bricks hit her all at once. She had not been prepared for Grace to become comfortable enough to ask about Will. Her heart swelled, thinking that everything could actually turn out okay after all.
"Mom?"
Alicia hummed as she heard her daughter call her. "Of course, what do you want to know?"
"Do I look like him?" she asked quietly.
"Close your eyes for a second. I'll tell you when to open them." Alicia reached over to the chair where the folder rests, she snatched it, grabbing the picture. She cupped one of her daughter's hands, placing the photo in her hand. "You can open when you are ready to."
"What is it?" Grace asked with her eyes still closed.
"A picture." Alicia smiled as she watched Grace peek out at the picture while still trying to keep her eyes closed. But Alicia guessed her curiosity won out because Grace's eyes were wide, taking in the picture. She watched as Grace turned the picture over, reading the information on the back.
"Who's Liz?"
"Will's mom."
"So my grandmother?"
Alicia sighed as she realized even more people were going to be affected by this, including Liz and Jackie. "Yes." Alicia started pointing to people in the photo and explaining who they are.
Grace turned a little and glanced at her mom then back at the picture. "You look happy in the photo." She started. "I don't think I've seen your smile that bright around dad."
Alicia smiled slightly, resisting the urge to confirm how happy she was there, that day with Will. She observed her daughter admire the picture, gently putting her fingers of the people in the photo. Alicia started to relax, watching Grace handle this so much better than she expected her to. She couldn't believe the maturity and open-mindedness Grace displayed today. She was proud of her daughter. Alicia rested her head against Grace's, staring at the photo. "You do look like him. Your beautiful hair and eyes." Alicia whispered.
"Really?" She asked as she tried to glance up at her mom.
"Yes, really." Alicia said with a laugh.
"I always thought it was strange that you and da—Peter…" Alicia heard the confusion in her voice as she faded off.
"I'm sure Peter won't mind you still calling him dad." She said, planting a kiss on top of her daughter's head. "Go on."
Grace took in a deep breath before continuing. "Both you and…dad have dark hair, even Zach has dark hair—but I have light brown hair." She said. "I know about recessive and dominant genes and all that, but it still didn't make sense to me." She sighed. "But now, looking at this picture, it's like the puzzle is complete."
They sat there quietly for several minutes before there was a knock at the door. Zach peeked his head in, "Mom," he started, "can you come out for a second?" he asked, clearly uncomfortable. Alicia looked down at Grace, who nodded and with that Alicia smiled and moved off the bed.
"Zach, want to keep Grace company for a bit?" She asked as she moved closer to the door.
"That sounds much more pleasant than the alternative." He smiled as she exited.
The moment she stepped into the hallway, she understood the reason for her son interrupting them. Will stood propped up against the wall and Peter sat in a chair against the opposite wall.
"I swear, I tried to keep the peace!" she heard Owen say as she looked back and forth between the two men. "I went to the bathroom for three minutes, apparently that was enough." Owen laughed a little.
Alicia glanced at Owen, then to Will, taking in his black eye, then to Peter, who was icing his hand. "This isn't funny Owen." She whispered. She turned to her husband, "Seriously Peter." She continued the whispering, too afraid to get any louder. Peter was about to say something, probably to defend himself when Alicia held up her hand. "I don't want to hear it Peter. I'm done. You should probably go speak to Eli, unless you want me to."
Peter stood up, shaking his head. "No, I want to see Grace."
Alicia laughed. She actually thought that was funny. Well that and what she was about to say. "Do you really think that's a good idea? You're icing your hand. Do you think she won't notice and ask what you did? Do you really want to tell her that you punched her father?" She continued to smile, but that was wiped off her face when she heard the sound of skin on skin, and the radiating pain originating from her cheek.
"He," pointing to Will, "is not her father. I am. I raised her."
Alicia stood there in shock, tears welling in her eyes from the pain. She quickly overcame the shock, and belted loose, "You did not raise her, I did. I was the one home all the time, raising both of them!" She yelled, watching as Owen pushed Peter back against the wall. Will came to her side, "are you okay?" he slid his hand under her chin, not wanting to touch her cheek.
"I'm fine." She said brushing Will off. "Peter, you need to inform Eli. Before someone else gets wind of this and releases it. It would look better coming from you." She stood there observing Peter as Owen stood next to him, blocking his access to Grace's room and herself. It took several moments but he held his hands up in defeat. She watched as he retreated down the hallway.