"Reaching the moon with pieces of string? That isn't physically possible." said Noah.

"Neither is Owen getting laid, but that's not the point!" said Heather.

"That's an easy one!" said Courtney.

"You know how many pieces of string it would take to reach the moon?"

"Yes."

"Let me guess! Twenty-five billion, three hundred million, six hundred thousand, seven hundred and twenty-two!" said Owen.

"Not even close."

"Okay Miss counselor in training, what is the answer?"

"One."

"One?"

"The riddle asked how many pieces of string it would take to reach the moon, but it never said how long they were. Provided it was long enough it would only take one."

"Okay, but what does an impossibly long piece of string tell us about where the next clue is?"

"Read the next line of the riddle."

Don't worry about how long it would take; time is on your side.

"What the heck does that mean?"

"Have you ever noticed that the only clock on this ship is the cuckoo clock in the dining hall, and that it is always says it's twelve o'clock?"

They went to the dining hall and made it so the clock pointed to one o'clock. At that moment a miniature model of Chris' head came out of the clock holding the next clue in its mouth.

"I really hate that guy."

"Let's face it, the only reason we put up with Chris is the money."

"You already said that back in season two." said Sierra.

"I did?"

"Believe her; she's probably memorized every season word for word."

"Whatever. What's the next clue?"

"A really strange one."

Go up to the bridge and call for help.

But first you'll need three things, and you can find them all in a chessboard.

"We need three things and we can find them all in a chessboard?"

"Someone go get the chess set we used for our mock challenge."

They hadn't been to the bridge since their failed attempt to get control of the ship the night it crashed. Astonishingly one of the monitors was working, but it was asking for a password.

"Well… I don't see anything special." said Bridgett looking at the contents of the chess set.

"Hello guys, why is this word underlined?" asked Duncan.

"Because it's important?"

"Because it's the password."

Duncan typed the word chessboard on the console.

Access Denied

"You didn't really think it was going to be that easy, did you?" asked Courtney.

"Well I don't see you coming up with any bright ideas."

"The riddle said we need three things in the chess set. Obviously the password is one of the things inside it."

They tried typing in more words on the console, but none of them worked.

"Pawn… knight… rook… bishop… queen… king… castling… check… checkmate… black… white… darn it!"

"Anyone else have any ideas?"

"Three things and you can find them all in a chessboard… Wait a minute… The clue said chessboard, not chess set! Maybe there is something in the chessboard!"

"No offense Cody, but the chessboard is a little too thin to hide something in."

"Wait… He's right!" said John.

"He is?"

"Well… not in the way he's thinking."

John went over to the console and typed in three letters.

SOS

Access Granted

"Huh?"

"I don't get it." said Lindsay.

"I don't get it either."

"The riddle said we needed to call for help with three things that could be found in a chessboard. It meant three letters."

Confessional Cabin: Gwen

"I've got to hand it to John, I never would have figured that one out."

More text came up on the monitor.

An Italian, a plumber, a carpenter, a doctor, and the president of a toy-making company all walk into a room with no windows and only one door. When a dinosaur walks in the same room moments later there is only one person inside. How is that possible?

"This is an easy one." said John.

"It is?"

"The answer is simple. The person in the room is Italian, and is also a plumber, a carpenter, a doctor, and the president of a toy-making company."

"Talk about being an overachiever." said Geoff.

"And the location of the next clue?"

If John wasn't wearing his helmet the others would have seen him smile.

"Boys, how many Italian plumbers do we know?"

Cody was the first to answer.

"Nintendo's legendary mascot, Mario!"

"And there is a painting of Mario in the library."

"Wait, when was Mario ever a carpenter?" asked Gwen.

"In his debut appearance, the 1981 Donkey Kong arcade game." said Harold. "But back then he was simply called Jumpman."

"And one of his alter egos is Dr. Mario… But what about being the president of a toy-making company?"

"Mario vs. Donkey Kong 2: March of the Minis."

Confessional Cabin: Courtney

"Men…"

They went down to the library and looked behind the painting of Mario. Much to their surprise the next clue was clear and direct, but they didn't like what it said.

There is no big mystery about the next clue.

Inside the gorilla's cave, it's in plain view.

"Why do they have to be so cruel?"

"It's Chris."

"Okay… I know where the gorilla's cave is. Who's going with me?" asked John.

Everyone was quiet.

"Well don't everyone volunteer at once."

"What do you need us for anyway?" asked Heather.

"I'm the one with the most experience running from that trigger happy throwback. But while he's distracted I need one of you to run in and get the clue."

"I'll do it." said Duncan "I'm not scared of a walking rug."

"Tell that to Sasquatchanakwa."

"Let's just go get the freaking clue."

The sun was setting on the horizon as John and Duncan crept across the island to the gorilla's cave.

"It just occurred to me that this is the farthest I've been from the ship since this ordeal began."

"As you can tell there isn't much to see on this island."

"Maybe the programmers are lazy, or maybe they don't get paid enough. I wonder how much money those little virtual pods and the ship is costing Chris and the show's producers."

"Well let's face it; they wouldn't be giving a million dollars away unless they could make at least five times as much. Shh… There it is."

The gorilla was sitting at the entrance of his cave watching the sun set and polishing his shotgun.

"Okay, remember the plan. I'll lead him away; you run in and find the clue. I'll meet you back at the ship."

Confessional Cabin: Duncan

"When I first met John I thought he was just a diehard geek with two swords, but he's been risking his rear end to bring us something to eat besides beans since day two, he's the only person I know who's verbally declared that the reason my relationship with Courtney didn't work out was because she was being a royal pain in the ass, and now he's the one playing tag with King Kong while I grab the next clue."

"Hey! Donkey Kong! Over here!"

The gorilla raised his shotgun and gave chase.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

"You couldn't hit a hummer limo that was standing still!"

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Duncan waited until the gorilla was out of sight before he rushed into the cave.

"Okay… It said the clue is supposed to be easy to spot."

Sitting at the top of a big pile of bananas was a Gilded Chris.

"I really hate him."

Duncan looked at the Gilded Chris for any sign of a clue. There were some numbers carved into the bottom.

3818919

Confessional Cabin: Chris

"Sorry folks, but I'm afraid we're out of time. Join us next time as the castaways discover the location of the Buff of Life, and if I have anything to say about it, and I do, then it won't be easy getting there. What surprises do we have in store for the castaways? Who will be the first to fall? Find out next time right here on Total Drama Shipwreck!"