I am so sorry. You can chase me and beat me with sticks, now. I know I said after the 12 of Feb., but I was swamped with work from school and projects other people wanted me to do. Yesterday when I came to finish this chapter is the first in a while that I've actually touch my computer. {Also for Peyton Haters, I heard that she might not be on the show anymore.}
Anyways forget my rant. Thanks to all who reviewed and since I was late I made this chapter my longest yet. Hope you like it.
Brooke'sPov
I couldn't believe what I saw when I walked through that door. That couldn't be Peyton. It was gauze wrapped thickly around her head, her leg was in a cast with metal rods on the side and elevated up high, it seemed like she had a scratch or gnash on every inch of her body, her side was gauzed up also, and her hair looked like a haystack.
She looked purple and yellow, not the pretty off white skinned Peyton I know.
I couldn't stop the tears from falling down my face, nor could I stop the bile that rose up to my throat. I ran into Peyton's personal bathroom in her room and threw up. My stomach felt horrible and my head was so dizzy. I felt someone pull my hair back for me. Afterward I tried standing and didn't succeed. Strong hands gripped me around my waist and helped me stand up.
"Brooke…Brooke are you okay?" Lucas. I could recognize that voice in a storm. He had me propped up between him and the wall and he was trying to see what was wrong with me. I tried to keep my eyes open, but it was a struggle, everything felt so heavy.
"Haley, get a doctor!" Lucas yelled, but in a softer voice said, "Brooke, baby… please wake up! Brooke!" I felt something wet on my cheek, but I knew I wasn't crying so I guess it was Lucas' tears. That was the last thing I felt and Luke was the last thing I saw before my eyes shut close and I was enveloped in darkness.
Peyton'spov
Pain, it the only thing that I felt at the moment, it was all I could think. I lay wherever I am awake, but I kept my eyes close. I didn't want to think about if I was in Heaven or Hell. The way I was feeling, I figured hell. Maybe if I wasn't such a horrible person to Brooke and Lucas, then maybe I wouldn't be here. I wanna sob and just break down crying, but I'm scared even my tears will hurt.
Why couldn't I accept Lucas and Brooke's relationship earlier? Why do I always have to be the backstabbing bitch? Well since I did the crime, I might as well face my consequences.
I struggled to open my eyes, they felt like they were glue together. I finally open them slowly and all I can see is blurriness. White blurriness.
"Sweetie," a sweet, old voice said. Oh God, I just might be in heaven. "You may be feeling a bit of pain right now, but a least you're awake."
"Where am I?" I asked my voice raspier than Brookes.
"Tree Hill Hospital, darling you were in an accident." She replied. I'm alive. I wonder what the others are doing right now, if they know about me.
"Okay the doctor wants you to rest so I'm going to give you a little some to help with the pain and that'll help you sleep." She paused for a second. "Now when you wake up, you can see your visitors."
"Vis-" I started to say, but the pain medicine started kicking in and made me feel drowsy.
"It's alright, honey, just rest." The nurse said.
I just nodded and dozed off into a deep sleep.
Brooke'sPov
I opened my eyes and find myself on a hospital bed with Luke in a chair next to me holding my hand.
"Luke." I whispered.
"Brooke, how do you feel?" he asked kissing the side of my head gently.
"Selfish and like a drama queen." I replied groaning. I couldn't believe I fainted.
"You're not selfish Brooke. It may have just been too much for you to handle seeing Peyton like that, I mean, she was your best friend."
"Yeah I guess. Where are Haley and Nathan and why am I in a hospital bed?" I was anxious to get out of here, I have never really liked hospitals. Usually something bad always happens.
"They went to get some coffee and the doctor wanted to run some test to see if you were fine, but he wanted to wait til you were awake. You were out for about an hour."
I felt stressed, so I looked into Lucas' eyes, which were like two blue crystal orbs, and I instantly calmed.
We were interrupted by the doctor entering the room.
"Miss Davis, sorry to interrupt, but I just wanna do a quick check up to make sure everything's alright." The doctor said, but I hated doctors.
"Umm… I rather not," Luke and the doctor looked at me curiously, "I mean, I'm fine. It was just a shock to see Peyton like that."
I moved to get up, but Lucas stopped me. "Uh… Brooke, are you sure?"
"Yeah Luke, I'm fine. I just wanna see Peyton and make sure she's okay."
Luke nodded his head and thanked the doctor and we walked out in the hall towards Peyton's room.
"Here we go," Lucas looked at me with a worried expression that seemed to be etched on his face, "we don't have to do this now, we can wait til you feel better."
For my answer I walked into the room. It still surprised me to see Peyton like that, but I didn't break completely down like last time. I walked up to her bed and took her hand which seemed like the only part of her body not bruised. Tear threatened to spill from my eyes and I couldn't stop them. Lucas hugged me from behind and whispered, "Its okay, and it's not your fault."
Oh how he knew me so well. How he could tell I would blame myself for every bruise, scar, or scratch on her body. We stayed like that for a while, then the door creaked open slowly and Haley and Nathan came into the room.
"Hey Tigger, are you okay?" Haley asked pulling me in to a tight hug.
"I'm fine, please don't worry about me." I said as Nathan came up and squeezed my shoulder.
"Well how is she?" Nathan said referring to Peyton.
"The same I guess, we haven't seen a doctor or nurse come in so far." Lucas answered.
After a while I moved back so Haley could see Peyton. I went over to the window and stared out for a minute. Strong arms enveloped my waist seconds later.
"PrettyGirl, you brooding now?" I smiled despite myself. I was about to reply with a smart comeback when we heard a voice raspier than mine mumble,
"Brooke…."
We turned toward Peyton to see her eyes half opened and staring straight at me.
Then nurse burst into the room saying in a cheery voice, "Is somebody awake yet?"
We all chuckled nervously, but didn't move. The nurse went over and examined Peyton to make sure she was all right. "Sweetie, would you like some water, so your voice can clear up?"
Peyton gave a horse, "Yes, please."
It looked as if she were fully awake and aware of her surroundings. The nurse carefully gave Peyton some water, then said, "Now, Ms. Sawyer, if you need anything, just push that button, right there." She said pointing to the bright, red one on the inside of her bed rail. Then the nurse left and tension rose.
"Can talk to Peyton alone, you guys?" I asked quietly.
They all mumbled a yes and left. "So, how do you feel?" I asked which was stupid because she obviously wasn't feel so happy now.
"Um… as bad as I probably look." She answered anyway.
I walked up to Peyton's bedside chair, sat in it, and hesitated slightly before grabbing her hand. I stared at the wall for a while, the sun making a rainbow reflection.
I felt Peyton squeezed my hand softly.
"I'm sorry, Peyton." I declared finally. I couldn't believe I was about to do it again, I was about to give her Lucas to her again.
"For what, Brooke." Her voice was a little clearer than when she first woke.
I was about to say why I was sorry, when she continued, "For being in love? For living your life...No, Brooke I'm sorry! You shouldn't have to apologize for being you, but I should be the one apologizing for expecting you to alter your life and give up what's most important to you for me...again!"
Of course, being me, I was about to argue with her.
"Let me just get this out, Brooke." She cleared her throat and I gave her some water, "Now, Brooke while I was away, I just, I felt so alone and everywhere I went there were couples. I wanted that that I was so desperate to go back to some one who has probably moved on and force my self on him thinking he would love me if no one else does. Brooke, I hurt you and I'm sorry. I just want you to be happy."
I looked at her face and saw tears running down the sides of her face.
"Peyton," I said taking one of my hands and stroking her hair softly, "what about you happiness, I mean, you had him first." I stated my heart slowly breaking.
Peyton suddenly tried to sit up, but then hissed in pain. She slowly laid back down on the bed. "Brooke, if I could get out of this bed, I would wash your mouth out with soap. Everyone knows Luke was yours first! I mean, you kissed him first, got his love first, heck, Brooke you loved him first. You made love to him first." Peyton stared at the wall ahead for a minute, then turned and looked at Brooke.
"So did I Brooke? Did I really have him? I starting to think that I never even really had him. Plus Brooke, you wore his ring first." Peyton finished.
"What? Who told you that?" I asked my eyes widened, slightly surprised.
"Luke," she answered nonchalantly, "he felt guilty."
"Peyton, he didn't purpose to me, I was just trying the ring on-"she cut me off.
"Brooke, God, why are you so stubborn?" she exclaimed.
I sighed, "Peyton, he asked you to marry him and to be his wife, not me."
Peyton quickly explained, "What the hell, Brooke, only because you turned him down the last time ya'll broke up that I would've thought that I didn't have a chance either if I was him. Plus, Brooke, when we came back to Tree Hill, you didn't fight for him. You didn't let him know that you still loved him, Brooke. Remember in high school when you wanted him to fight for you. Maybe that's all Lucas wanted."
I let go of her hand and stood in front of the window thinking quietly. "Brooke you're even close to Karen, she's like a mother to you. I barely mumbled two words to her. Also, Keith… Brooke, if anybody should wear his ring, it should be you. I don't think I've ever even talked to him. I just knew that that ring was important to Lucas and I just had to have it. I mean come on, Brooke think about it, you guys are perfect for each other…"
I closed my eyes and sighed heavily. I thought about the old times that Peyton had mention and others…..
Flashback
"Anyway, I don't get why you're so upset." Lucas said.
"You're kidding right?" Brooke asked surprised.
"You're the one who wanted to be nonexclusive, I'm just doing what you wanted." Lucas explained motioning toward the car where the redhead watched.
"What I wanted?" Brooke paused looking Lucas straight in his eyes, "I wanted you to fight for me. I wanted you to say there is no one else that you could ever be with and that you'd rather be alone than without me. I wanted the Lucas Scott from the beach that night telling the world that he's the one for me."
"How was I supposed to know that?" Lucas asked with a torn expression.
It was silent for a moment as they stared at each other.
Then Brooke whispered, "You just are."
End of Flashback
Flashback
Suddenly Lucas kisses Brooke with a fiery passion. Brooke pulls away, stares at Lucas for a second, then says,
"Tell me that was a good-bye kiss." Brooke said already knowing the answer.
"I wanna be with you Brooke," Lucas states
"What?" Brooke asked stepping back.
"I'm sorry, I know we're friends. It's just how I feel." He confesses.
End of Flashback
Brooke opens her eyes and looks over at Peyton who's watching her. "Peyton I just-"I start to say, but Peyton interrupts her.
"God, Brooke, why are you so damn selfish? You have someone who loves you above all else and you're questioning whether or not you belong together? You know sometimes I wonder how you graduated high school." I laughed. That was P. Sawyer, always hitting you hard.
"Thanks, Peyt, I love you." Before Peyton could respond, there was a knock at the door.
Brooke went to the door and opened it to reveal Haley.
"Sorry, Brooke, but everyone else wants to talk to her to. Plus Lucas is getting anxious and I have to go check on Jamie in a few." Haley said with a smile.
"Fine, you guys can come in we're done." I sighed. I had forgot about the others waiting.
"Okay, I'll tell them." Haley replied walking toward the waiting area.
I turned back to Peyton, calm and happy. "The others are coming in a few. So, umm… is there anything you need or want?" I asked.
"Uh…some comfortable clothes for when I can put them on and some good food." We both chuckled at that, hospital food was never good.
"I'll be back." I told her, and then I walked out into the hallway. Haley and the other we headed to Peyton's room. As soon as Lucas saw me, he grabbed me and pulled me into a tight hug. My body molded into his perfectly. "You still love me?' he asked his face buried in my hair.
I looked up at him and said softly, "Never stopped."
Then Lucas pressed his lips to mine and I held him close, relishing in the fireworks and shivers he sent throughout my body.
It's better to have loved and lost than to never have lost at all. ~ Samuel Butler
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