Chapter Eleven

B had just made it to the parking lot when Jasper caught up to her.

"Isabella why are you doing this?" he asked gently grabbing her arm and turned her toward him.

"Why aren't you?" she asked him back. "Why am I always the one to let you go? Jasper, my angel, you are married. I won't be the cause of your marriage failing; I don't have the right to be. I gave you up seven years ago; you had every right to move on."

"But I didn't, not truly. I never stopped loving you."

"Why are you doing this to me? I won't start a conflict between our families. Uncle Aro would have you killed for telling me these things. Our feelings don't matter. Jasper…" She paused not really wanting to tell him this. She knew it would only hurt him more which would cause her more pain as well and she didn't know how much more either of them could take. "Jasper I'm betrothed. He's strong and slightly more protective of me than even Caius and Marcus, though Aro is greatly more protective. He's killed your kind for just looking at me. But I agreed to marry him. It may very well break me in doing so but I can't back out of the arrangements. Aro picked him specifically for me. I'm so sorry."

She hated that she'd hurt him again. It seemed like that was all she could ever do. It broke her heart to see unshedable tears glaze his eyes, but there was nothing she could do.

"We could run. You're old enough now to be a believable runaway. We'd go somewhere and-"

"They'd send Dimitri after us. We would never escape. He'd track us down in a matter of weeks with Jane, Alec, or both on his heels. They'd kill you in front of me then keep me within their sights at all time. I couldn't live through that. I won't let you die for me. Not ever. Don't come to the BBQ. Aro said the man I'm betrothed to cannot wait to see me, hinting that he will be there. I don't want to cause you more pain; it would kill me to do so. This has to be goodbye."

Jasper still refused to let go of her instead pulling her to him and kissed her with all he had. He had to convince her to somehow get out of her engagement. The thought of her in another's arms destroyed his still heart. He wouldn't, couldn't, lose her again, not matter what the costs.

Bella tried to pull away but try as she might he wouldn't let go. It was obvious what he was trying to convey to her; the message was load and clear, he wasn't going to let her go again; he wasn't going to let anyone take her away again.

When he pulled away to allow her to catch her breath he looked her straight in the eyes making sure she could not look away.

"I will never lose you again; I would not survive it." Though his words tore at her heart, they also stirred an anger in her that could not be diminished.

"You never lost me. My love for you never wavered. I was here wishing you'd come to me every day but you never did. You knew my father lived in Washington, you knew his name and mine. How many Chief Swans could this dull state have, Jasper?" She couldn't control her voice in the slightest. It would rise until she was almost yelling at Jasper then diminish to a silent whisper. "I was the one who lost you. I couldn't speak about you or write about you or I'd have to answer so many unwanted questions. The only person I did tell about you was my cousin but only because she asked me to describe my perfect man. I had to hide your existence from everyone I knew. I didn't have a choice. I couldn't look for you, I was so young and I couldn't risk it. Yesterday, when I saw you in the cafeteria was the first time I have felt truly happy since I left you seven years ago and that was only for the briefest moments. In so many ways I am still that innocent girl that loves you so dearly but my life has forced me to keep her hidden. But she has always been here; it's just her future that has changed so much."

Jasper wanted to say something but no words came to him. He'd lived over a hundred years, knew probably over 1000 words but none could describe how he ached at the sound of her pain.

Bella finally freed herself from his grasp and walked away heading toward the car her father had surprised her with that morning tears silently running down her face as she left without caring that school was still very much in session.