Author's Notes: I apologize profusely for the delay - I went back to find the last chapter I posted and found that it was in July! I don't even know what to say to justify a two month wait. I'll just throw myself at your mercy and hope you will forgive me sometime soon:) The good news is that chapter 12 is already written. I just need to do some tweaking before I can post it.
A quick note to those who are wondering, I will be getting to the rescue soon. Please bear with me...
As always, big thanks go out to Diane for picking at my story, forcing me to look at it from different angles. It always helps to have a different opinion. With that said, I love feedback. Any feedback is helpful, whether it encourages me to write more or inspires me with ideas, I really do appreciate your thoughts!
Tangled Alliances
Chapter 11
Daniel took his time as he headed for his bed after the evening meal. He was reluctant to get there, knowing what he was expected to do. It wasn't that he didn't like Sam, and he definitely enjoyed himself when they were making love, but he still had his misgivings in regard to the whole thing. Sam was his friend and he worried about the consequences they would face when this was all over.
He walked slowly toward the tent and stopped when he saw Sam standing next to the steps in front of the doorway. She was talking with a couple of the other women, and Daniel saw her smile at something one of them said. She's beautiful, he thought, as he stared at his friend. The afternoon sun cast a yellowish tint to everything, which highlighted the gold in Sam's hair. She smiled brightly at the women, as the sound of their laughter filtered over to him, and Daniel felt a wave of sadness wash over him. She would never truly belong to him.
He shook away the sadness and walked determinedly toward the tent. It was just a job. No worse than having to clean up after the mastidge, the hairy, filthy animals that seemed to be everywhere when he lived on Abydos. Sleeping with Sam was actually a pleasant job, and Daniel smiled at her when she saw him heading her way. She smiled back, then nodded at her companions when they said something to her before leaving her alone with Daniel.
"Hey Daniel," she said, linking her arm in his. He nodded at her, but didn't respond. He couldn't speak over the lump in his throat. "You okay?" The concern in her eyes, as she tried to catch his, was almost his undoing.
"Yep." He smiled at her to reinforce the statement, but he had a feeling she saw right through his charade.
"Are you sure?" She was worried, all right. Daniel didn't respond, he just gave her a small smile as he led her away from the tent. They still had a little more time, and a walk in the late afternoon sun would be a welcome respite. Besides, the views toward the distant mountains were quite beautiful in the early twilight hours.
They walked toward the fence, but turned back when a guard snarled out a warning at them. He was one of the guards who spent the night walking up and down the aisle between the beds. Daniel figured it was best not to antagonize the man. Sam watched the guard to make sure he was out of earshot, then turned and asked Daniel, "Have you ever wondered how they could walk up and down the aisle between the beds while we made love without them getting… um… passionate themselves?"
Daniel just shrugged, although he couldn't help the smile that graced his features. After all they'd been through, it was refreshing to know that she was still modest. But the answer was simple enough. "Eunuchs," he told her.
She smiled conspiratorially at him, as she shook her head. She made a show of looking around, then leaned in close to him to whisper, "A potion."
"What?" Daniel wasn't sure that he heard her correctly. She was grinning at him, and Daniel started to laugh. "Seriously?"
Her smile widened, as she nodded her head. "Seriously. The other women were telling me about it. The guards take the potion about an hour before nightfall and it's supposed to last until the next morning."
Daniel was feeling queasy at the very thought of it. "No wonder they're so cranky."
"Uh huh," she said, as she pulled him along with her toward the tent. "We all know how men are when they don't "get" any." She rolled her eyes at him, then smiled when Daniel glared at her.
"Not all men are like that," he told her defensively.
"Uh huh," she said, once again, although this time there was a definite sarcastic tone to the words. Daniel couldn't help the guilty grin that spread across his face, and Sam laughed when she saw it. This playful banter between them eased Daniel's mind a little. So far, they were still friends.
They walked over to the tent and went in at the urging of one of the guards. The other slaves were settling down, while he and Sam stopped just inside the doorway. They did this every night, and it had almost become a ritual for them. The guards usually left them alone during this brief reprieve, having gotten used to their routine. As long as he and Sam were in the tent, they were happy.
"You ready for this?" he asked his friend. She shrugged her shoulders, but she stared into his eyes, as if trying to find his soul. Daniel knew what she was looking for and he gave her a small smile, hoping to tell her that everything was going to be okay, but it wasn't enough.
"We need to talk, Daniel."
Oh great, Daniel thought, so much for avoiding the subject. Maybe if he stalled around… "What about?"
She didn't get to answer. One of the guards walked toward them with a menacing look, prompting both Daniel and Sam to move out of the way. They went over to their bed and sat down to pull off their boots, before slipping under the blanket. Daniel got in first, moving his arm to help Sam as she squirmed to get comfortable. She ended up lying next to him, with her head on his shoulder and one arm wrapped around his waist. This was unusual, and Daniel pulled his head back so that he could look into her eyes. Normally, she would lie down next to him, waiting for him to make the first move.
"What?" he asked, as he stared into her eyes. She gave him a secret smile, and Daniel went on alert. He just knew something was up.
"We need to talk," she insisted.
Oh great, she wasn't going to let it go. "The guards are not going to let us," he warned her, proud of himself for thinking of a way out, then stared at his friend in shock when she got up and straddled his hips. Neither one said anything as she lowered herself until she was lying on top of him, her mouth hovering just inches from his.
"It's important," she breathed, as she kissed him lightly. Daniel didn't bother responding to her words. He was not going to cooperate on this; it was a matter of principle now. Sam had other ideas though. She rubbed her nose alongside his, coming in close enough to just barely touch his lips with hers, then pulling back, before doing it all over again. He kept trying to catch her lips in a kiss, but she wouldn't let him and it was driving him crazy. She teased him with the soft, sweetness of her lips as she occasionally brushed his mouth with hers, then moved away only far enough to keep him from taking possession. He moaned as her body followed the actions her mouth took, her hips pressing into him, then pulling back, exciting Daniel even more. He wanted her. He lifted his head, as he tried to capture her lips with his, but she was insistent. She pulled back from his searching lips, while settling her hips back into his groin, as she whispered urgently, "Please, Daniel."
"Huh?" he asked, as he grabbed her head in his hands and tried to force her to stop driving him crazy. He kissed her eagerly, relishing in the fact that she kissed him back, their tongues briefly meshing before she pulled back and smiled at him. She let her hands roam down his body from where they were resting on his chest, and Daniel was lost to the sensations she was creating. Her hands continued their journey, skimming across the skin of his abdomen, creating warmth, before roaming lower and tugging at the waistband of his pants. He was on fire, as he slid his hands underneath her shirt to give her the same pleasure she was bestowing on him. He found that he liked this side of Sam Carter.
She moaned when he found her breasts, but apparently, she was on a mission. "Can we talk afterward?" she asked, as she ground her hips against his lower body, while her hands slipped under the waistband of his pants.
Daniel didn't care by this point. He would have promised her the moon – anything to get on with the seduction. "Yeah," he sighed.
She smiled at him, but still she wasn't through tormenting him. She kissed him again, then pulled back to look into his eyes as her hands did wonderful things to him. "Do you promise?"
Daniel moaned when her hand settled lower and caressed him. "I promise. Oh Sam." She smiled at him and gave him what he wanted, kissing him passionately while he squirmed and rolled them over until he was on top. There was no way he was going to let her tease him any more and it wasn't long before she was begging him for something entirely different.
It wasn't until later, while Daniel was waiting for his heart to stop racing that Sam brought up the subject again. "Are you asleep?" she whispered into his ear.
"Almost." It was the truth. His heart had begun to settle down and Daniel was just dozing off. He turned his head toward her as she reached under the blanket to get her clothes squared away and Daniel figured it would be a good idea if he did the same. He then lay on his back, tensing up as Sam got into her "talking position". She pressed her body into his side, as she threw her leg over him, then laid her head on his shoulder. She did this every time she wanted to talk to him in their bed, mainly because this position allowed them to talk amongst themselves without being overheard. Daniel usually liked it when she snuggled up to him like that, but this time was different. He had a good idea of what she wanted to talk about, and he would rather the subject not be brought up at all.
"You promised we could talk." Her voice held a hint of pleading, but Daniel was a little incensed that she tricked him into giving in.
"Under extreme situations," he groused. She had the nerve to smile at him, before pressing her face into his shoulder to try to hide the smile. She kissed his neck, causing a shiver to run down his spine, then looked back at him, the smile conveniently hidden. He knew better, though. She had known exactly what to do to wring that promise from him. "I would have promised to give you my most prized possession to get you to stop driving me crazy," he said.
"Oh yeah?" Her smile was dazzling and Daniel found that he couldn't stay mad at her. "And to think I could have walked away with that statuette you found on P7X-437," she added, the sarcasm in her voice telling him that she wouldn't have wanted that thing even if it was his most prized possession, which they both knew it wasn't.
He grinned back at her, then reached over to push her hair off of her face. His smile dimmed as he worried about what he would tell her if he couldn't convince her to just go to sleep. "I'm pretty tired, Sam. Let's do this tomorrow."
"You promised me, Daniel."
"There's nothing to talk about."
"There's plenty to talk about," she countered. "I want to know how you are handling this."
Daniel couldn't help but be surprised that she would ask that. "How I'm handling it?"
"Yes. I know you Daniel. This has got to be tearing you apart and I'm worried about you."
Well, you don't have to be," he snapped angrily, genuinely irritated that she would be pushing him like this. He didn't need this at all. "I'm a big boy now. I can take care of myself."
"I know that," she hissed, then looked over to the end of the bed when a guard banged his stick against the railing. Apparently they were irritating the guard, as well.
"You are talking too loud," the guard warned them. "Go to sleep."
Daniel nodded, then lay there and listened to the footsteps as the man walked toward the other end of the tent. He shook his head, while he stared at the ceiling, then smiled at Sam as he said, "Jack better be glad he got stuck babysitting those kids. He's cranky enough as it is without adding a potion to his diet." This caused Sam to giggle and she had to bury her face into his shoulder to smother her laughter. Daniel laughed quietly along with her, glad for the lull from the anger that had blossomed in his heart. They were both dealing with a crap load of emotional baggage and he knew they were better off working through their problems, but he was afraid of the fallout if they did.
They lay there quietly, while Sam ran her hand lazily over his chest. He could tell she still wanted to talk, but he was not going to be the one to start the conversation back up again. Apparently, he didn't have to.
"Are we going to be okay when this is all over?" she asked in a whisper, her breath tickling his ear as she spoke.
"Yes, we will," he whispered in response. He wanted to believe that more than anything, and he hoped that his words would make it true.
"We'll still be friends?" She sounded so sad and Daniel pulled her closer, hugging her tightly as he tried to calm her fears.
"I want that more than anything," he admitted. "You and Jack went on as if nothing happened. We can do the same."
"No," she said, with an urgency that surprised him. "Please Daniel, I don't want us to end up like that!"
This was serious, he realized. He turned on his side so that he was facing her, then pulled her even closer so that they could really discuss their problems without anyone listening in. "Like what?" he had to ask. He had always thought that Jack and Sam handled their relationship, or lack thereof, rather well. She shook her head as she tried to look away, probably wishing she hadn't said anything, but Daniel's curiosity was piqued. What was going on between those two?
"Come on, Sam," he whispered, as he forced her to look at him. "Talk to me."
She gave him a weak smile, while she caressed his cheek with her fingers, then sighed. "The Colonel and I are so distant now. We can't be together like we were on the ice planet, and sometimes I just…" She stopped speaking, and Daniel worried that she was actually going to cry. He hoped not. He didn't think he could handle her tears. "We have to go out of our way to make sure no one ever suspects that… well, you know." She shrugged, then whispered, "We can't even be friends."
Daniel heard the pain in her voice, even as she tried to hide it. "You love him, don't you?"
"No," she said, a little too loudly. They both looked around, and Sam lowered her voice to a whisper again. "He is my commanding officer. We'd be facing a court martial for even thinking about it."
"Regulations," he acknowledged, with a grimace. Daniel had heard all he ever wanted to hear in regard to the regulations. He had spent way too many years working with the Air Force to not have an inkling of the rules and regulations that governed the people who worked with him. The regulations got in his way many times, causing frustration to gnaw at him when he had to fight to get anything done, but such was life with the Air Force, or so he tried to tell himself.
But he just couldn't figure out how two people could hide their feelings, even from themselves. He personally would never be able to hide his feelings for his wife, Sha're, no matter how many rules dictated that he had to.
"Regulations," Sam whispered sadly. They lay there for a few minutes, as a guard walked past. Daniel used this opportunity to try to come up with something to say that would help her through her pain. He knew both Sam and Jack well enough to know that they would follow the rules, no matter how much it hurt, but it seemed to Daniel that Sam's pain was more than she could bear.
"Why don't you just tell him how you feel?" Daniel was still having a hard time dealing with the complexity of his friends' relationship. Maybe Sam could put things in simple terms for him. "Sam?" he asked, when she didn't respond right away.
"I can't Daniel. He is so distant and every time we find ourselves in a situation that I think would be a good time to talk about it, I get scared. His attitude makes me think that maybe he really doesn't care for me in that way." She sighed, then said, "Then there are the times when I think he does care about me a lot, but then the regulations get in the way." She stared at him for a second, while Daniel gave serious thought to the idea of kissing her until her sadness was a thing of the past. He settled on kissing her on the forehead instead.
"Jack cares a lot about you, Sam. His reaction the last couple of days proves it." He caressed her cheek with his thumb, then told her, "It's killing him that you and I are sleeping together."
"I know and that's one more thing for me to feel bad about." She lay there quietly for a moment, lost in her own misery, then hugged him tightly to her, as she hid her face in his shoulder. Daniel held her just as tightly, hoping to ease her fears. This whole thing was killing her, as well.
"It'll be all right," he soothed, as he pulled back to look into her face.
Sam nodded sadly at his words, but Daniel knew that she had her doubts. He didn't blame her; he had some major doubts of his own. "I just don't want this to destroy the friendships between you, Jack and I," she told him.
"It won't." At least he hoped it wouldn't. Jack seemed to be okay with the whole thing, but then again, Jack was a master at hiding his feelings from the world. No one knew what was going on in that man's head and Daniel had long since given up trying.
"I hope not. We make quite a team." She smiled at him, as she kissed him softly, then said, "I want us to stay friends."
"Friends," Daniel repeated, his heart saddened by her words. It was what he wanted more than anything, but would Jack let them when this was all over?
Sam must have recognized the sadness, because she brought her hand up to caress his cheek. "Daniel?" she whispered urgently, "What are you thinking about?" He smiled at her to let her know everything was okay, but it was a weak smile and she didn't fall for it. "Please talk to me."
"Isn't that my line?" he asked with a grin, hoping to lighten the mood a little.
"I'm stealing it," she responded sarcastically.
Her smile dimmed as she stared at him. He could tell she was trying to come up with the right words, but Daniel didn't want to talk about it. "Go to sleep Sam. Tomorrow might be a big day for us."
"Yeah. I hope that radio works," she whispered. "I've been trying to figure out where they put our weapons and equipment in case it doesn't, but so far no luck."
"It will work. It has to."
"Thanks for the vote of confidence there, buddy." He grinned at her sarcasm, thinking that she'd been hanging around Jack too long.
"Let's get some sleep," he tried again. She nodded, and they lay there still entwined, as the snores of their neighbors filtered throughout the tent. The weight of her leg nestled over his felt good to Daniel, and he relished in the closeness of their bodies and souls. They were at peace with each other. For the most part, Daniel thought to himself. Emotions were still raging within him, but Sam wanted things to work out between them when this was all over, and this eased Daniel's anxiety. At least they would still be friends.
"Are you falling in love with me Daniel?" Sam whispered against his ear. He stared at her in shock, wondering where that question came from. Was he that transparent?
He stared at her for a moment, trying to come up with the right words to tell her how he felt, but panic moved in. Would she laugh at him? "What makes you think that?" he asked her with a small smile, hoping to show her she was wrong. It had taken a lot for her to ask that question, Daniel realized, when she blushed and hid her face into his neck. "Sam?"
"I don't know," she finally admitted, although she hadn't raised her head to look at him. She didn't elaborate, but Daniel decided to just go with it. If she could muster up the courage to ask him, the least he could do was give her an answer. He just hoped that he would be able to do it tactfully.
"I've always thought of you as my best friend, Sam. You, Jack and Teal'c are like family to me." He smiled into the darkness as memories flashed through his mind, memories of his friends, especially Jack, being there for him when he had desperately needed somebody. These people were his life. "I've always cared deeply for you."
"But?" she prompted, as she finally came up to look at him. Relief was etched clearly across her face and Daniel had to smile. She was more perceptive than he gave her credit for.
"But I don't think that what I feel for you is that kind of love."
She smiled at him, as she laid her head back down on his shoulder and placed her hand on his chest. "You had me worried for a while there, Daniel." She rubbed her hand over his chest, as she did earlier, and Daniel felt at peace.
"Sorry about that," he mumbled. She shook her head, telling him silently that all was well now. Daniel was actually starting to believe that. Now if he could just get Jack to forgive him… "I was thinking about Sha're earlier," he said quietly, after another guard walked past them. He and Sam were getting good at keeping out of trouble on that score.
"You loved her."
"Yes I did. I remember how I used to think that I couldn't live without her." Sadness had crept into his voice, as he spoke of his late wife. He really had loved her more than anything in the world. "I couldn't bear to even think of something happening to her, or of her loving someone else. I never, ever wanted to let her go." Sam put her arms around him, hugging him tightly, and Daniel appreciated it with all his being. He hugged her back, then told her, "Earlier today, I was thinking about how much I enjoy our lovemaking and how much you really mean to me." He reached over to stroke her cheek, as he built up the nerve to tell her what he had discovered. "I do love you Sam, but I can let you go."
She smiled at him, but horror swept over Daniel as his fingers encountered wetness. She was crying! This was not what he intended, and he reached over to hug her tightly, his lips brushing her brow, hoping to ease her pain. She returned the hug, then pulled back. "I'm glad, Daniel," she whispered, still smiling at him. She didn't appear to be upset, and Daniel couldn't even begin to understand what had just happened, but Sam didn't seem to mind his confusion. She just went on to add, "Sha're was a lucky woman to have a man like you."
"Yeah," Daniel said, still trying to figure out whether Sam was hurt or not. They lay there in silence, while Daniel worried over Sam's feelings. He had been afraid of this, of hurting her and he felt like such an ass, but Sam's next words put his fears to rest.
"This has got to be the strangest conversation we've ever had." Daniel had to agree with her, he would never have thought he would have ended up in her bed, let alone talking to her about his feelings for her after making love to her. He grinned up at the ceiling as he thought about how much she enjoyed their romps in that bed. He had made sure of it. "Here we are sleeping together," she continued, "And talking about the people we really love."
His smile grew as he hugged her to him. "So you do love Jack."
"No, I don't." Her tone was adamant, but Daniel knew better. He continued to smile at her, and she frowned at him. "I don't love him, Daniel. Really I don't." He raised his eyebrows at her and she finally gave into her own smile. "Okay, so maybe I do." He nodded his head, while she sighed. "Don't you dare tell him about it Daniel. Promise me you won't tell him."
"I won't. But I still think that you should tell him."
She sighed, as she laid her head down on his shoulder again. "I wish I could," she said, her voice filled with sadness.
Daniel could relate to that. He wished he could help them find a way to get them together, but he knew that day might never come. He was just going to have to be there for Sam. "It'll be our secret," he told her, knowing that he would never betray her trust in him.
She nodded, and silence reigned once again. The words, 'Oh what a tangled web we weave,' came to mind as Daniel lay there in the semi-darkness of the tent, suddenly realizing the true extent of the phrase. He closed his eyes against the snores and mumblings of the others in the tent, as he dwelled on the fates of himself and of Jack and Sam. The three of them were a tangled alliance of friendship, love and despair, sharing close relationships, as well as a bond of friendship that ran deeper than anything Daniel had ever encountered. He valued that friendship and vowed that no matter what, he and his friends would get through this. He and Sam had worked through their relationship, now all he had to do was to convince Jack to forgive him. That shouldn't be too hard, he thought, as sleep overtook him. After all, they'd been in worse situations, hadn't they?