"Lord Edward?" Merlin asked as he stuck his head out of the chambers he had been confined to for a week now. When no reply came Merlin began to make his way out of the room as quietly as he possibly could.
Every other time he had attempted this, he had been thwarted by Lord Edward suddenly appearing from nowhere and forcing him back to bed. After about the sixth march back to the bed, Lord Edward had made explicitly clear what he would do if he caught Merlin trying to roam around again, most of which involved knocking him out and tying him to the bed posts. That would most certainly hinder the healing process, as Merlin had cheekily pointed out, much to Lord Edward's chagrin.
The hallway was deathly silent as Merlin crept along the wall, heading for anywhere that wasn't those damn chambers again. Honestly, Merlin wasn't sure why Lord Edward was even making such a big deal about his health anymore. His bruises were healing nicely and most were already fading from the dark blacks and purples to a sickly yellow color, which despite its look, actually meant they were healing.
Even his shoulder felt much better now. He had removed the sling himself a couple of days ago, against the Lord Edward's warnings. Merlin knew that dislocated shoulders hurt, but there was no need to make such a fuss for this long about it.
The only thing that gave him any problems were his ribs and even that was only when he moved too quickly or breathed too deeply. Not that he did either of those too often. No, Lord Edward had been there to stop that too.
Really Lord Edward had become like an omnipresent person who, excuse his pun, lorded over Merlin every second of the day. Merlin had no idea how he did it, unless he had magic or something, but Merlin no longer doubted Gaius words about Lord Edward knowing they had already been there a few short weeks ago.
His mind came to a screeching halt as he thought about Gaius. Why had he not replied back to Lord Edward's letter about Merlin being attacked and staying at the manor? Did he not care that his ward had been attacked? No, Merlin knew that Gaius loved him like a son and that he would be there for Merlin if he could. Maybe he hadn't even received the letter, or maybe it was too dangerous to travel the woods to get to the manor at this time. The last thing that Merlin wanted was for Gaius to get hurt trying to reach him.
No matter what the problem was, he was stranded in a manor with a strange lord who had an odd attachment to armor and who seemed hell bent on keeping Merlin confined to those chambers. It was like being a prisoner with a comfy bed and better food.
Merlin paused when he reached the stairs. He'd never been this far before, as Lord Edward had always managed to find him by now. Inside, Merlin was congratulating himself, while on the outside he was studying the stairs. He wasn't quite sure where the stairs would lead him, although he knew that he was going to find out.
With a self-satisfied smirk, he began to make his way down the stairs. Dust covered the floor, although there was a trail that was practically clear from where feet had cleared the path. He shuffled along the clear path, down the stair, noticing a lot of different scratch marks that littered the walls and floor. It was as if an animal had been released inside the manor and given free reign over the entire place.
Halfway down the stairs Merlin noticed that some of the things hanging on the walls had once been paintings, although dust, age, and sometimes even scratch marks made it impossible to tell what most of them had ever been.
Why on earth anyone would ever let their home get this bad, Merlin wasn't sure. The place didn't even seem livable sometimes, much less like a lord was currently living in it.
At the last step of the staircase Merlin realized that he had actually been in this hallway before. Back when he had first helped Gaius deliver supplies he had entered this hallway to get to the kitchens. This meant that if he kept going straight and out the large door at the end of the long hallway, then he could get to the entryway and out the front door. He could get back to Gaius, Gwen, and Camelot. All he had to do was reach that door.
Merlin glanced around the hallway, afraid that Lord Edward might have discovered his escape. This hallway was just as silent and empty as the last one, however, which helped reassure Merlin. Maybe Lord Edward had taken a stroll outside or something, although Merlin doubted that. He was supposed to be a shut-in recluse who didn't like people, so why would he go outside?
Why would he basically hold me against my will here then, Merlin thought bitterly.
Merlin shook his head as he continued walking through the hall. His footsteps seemed like thunder in his ears, as did his pounding heartbeat. Surely if Lord Edward had some kind of magic alert system then he should have known that Merlin was leaving already.
As he passed by the door he remembered leading to the kitchen he heard something. It sounded like metal moving and water sloshing around inside coming from the other side of the door.
Curiosity getting the better of him, Merlin couldn't help but press an ear to the door. Suddenly the door disappeared, leaving Merlin's weight hanging in the air for a moment before he fell and slammed into the floor.
The metal stopped moving and the sound of water came to a stop. It was as if everything had suddenly stopped. Merlin sat up a bit, using his elbows to stare up at the figure casting the shadow in front of him.
It was Lord Edward, Merlin could tell, even if he was no longer wearing all of his armor. He stood with his back to Merlin, his body tense as a bowstring. Merlin looked up from the ground at the back of Lord Edward's head, noticing that he was bald and his skin was marked with dark, black, vein-like tattoos.
Merlin realized that this was the first time he had ever seen any part of Lord Edward's skin. He was normally fully covered by all of his heavy armor that it was impossible to ever even catch a glimpse of what laid beneath it and not for lack of trying on Merlin's part.
Lord Edward's body was still tense and Merlin wondered if he was fighting down the fight or flight instinct that Merlin was. His magic had bubbled up inside him again, making him acutely aware of how long it had been since he had last used it. Never before had he put off using it for this long. Then again, it had never behaved for this long to ever give him a chance.
"Um, Lord Edward?" Merlin called out softly. He wished that he could turn around and walk out of the room and just keep going until he reached the door to leave. His mother used to tell him that he was too curious for his own good sometimes.
The lord's head twitched a bit in Merlin's direction in acknowledgement. Merlin wasn't sure what he should do with this acknowledgement though. He noticed that there was a bucket of water on the table in front of the lord and clothes next to him. Water was dripping from Lord Edward's hands and head, leaving Merlin to assume that he had been bathing, or at least cooling down in the hot kitchen.
Should Merlin leave the lord to whatever it was he had been doing? Or should he just back out of the room and run while he still could?
Merlin couldn't decide what to do. It was as if his mind had shut itself off to everything other than breathing. Merlin's eyes drifted over Lord Edward's body again, looking for some sighs of what he should do. That's when he noticed that something seemed to be off about the lord.
The ungloved hand that Merlin had been trying to get a glimpse of suddenly clenched, as if the lord had sensed him staring somehow. Merlin jumped at the sudden action, his back bumping into the door frame. He swallowed hard, hoping that the other man in the room hadn't noticed.
"Yes?" the lord asked, almost too quiet for Merlin to hear. His voice was wavering and weak, not anything like the normally boisterous, gruff voice that Merlin had grown accustomed to. The voice set alarm bells off inside Merlin's head.
"Are you alright?" Merlin asked, not sure what else he should do or say. He felt like an intruder although it hadn't even been his idea to continue to stay in the manor.
Merlin noticed the way the lord's body seemed to get even tenser, if that was even possible. Against Merlin's better judgment, Merlin took a couple of steps towards the lord, holding his hand out as if to touch him. The noble flinched away from Merlin's reach, bringing his still clenched hand up behind his head. It almost appeared as if he were trying to hide from Merlin.
"Get away from me," he growled, taking several steps away from Merlin. Merlin was stubborn though, and the man moving away from him wasn't going to stop him.
"Alright, alright," Merlin said, deciding that staying where he was was probably the best thing he could do at the moment. "Just… can I do anything to help?" he asked.
Merlin's mother had always said he had a huge heart, and even if he hadn't always believed her he knew that seeing anyone so obviously distressed made him want to help. His mother was like that too though, and it made him happy that he could have something in common with her.
Now the only problem was figuring out how he could help the man in front of him. The man didn't want Merlin around him- Merlin could tell-, yet he was reluctant to leave. He felt like all the secrets and questions that had been building up since he had first walked into the manor were so close to being revealed and if he walked out now, then he'd never find out.
Another part of Merlin told him he should probably leave like he'd been told. His magic had been going haywire and seeing the marks and terribly tense way he held himself only made it worse. One side of his magic was whispering and hinting at darkness in the room, that the man in front of him was dangerous and Merlin should get to safety, while the other side was screaming at him to help, even if he didn't really know Lord Edward nor did he know how to help.
"Just leave," the voice growled in an angry yet resigned way. Lord Edward began to walk away from the table and around towards the door, never once turning his face in Merlin's direction. He swiped his helmet off of the table and placed it firmly on his head, once again concealing his face and setting alarms off in Merlin's mind.
"But you helped me out, right? Now it's my turn to help you," Merlin said, finally taking a step to block the lord's path, cutting off his way to the door.
The lord stopped in his tracks, not wanting to come any closer to Merlin, or for him to come any closer to him. He moved his clenched fists until they were in front of him, blocked from Merlin's sight by the rest of his body.
His long sleeved shirt obscured most of his skin, but the little that Merlin could see looked painful. There were dark black and silver shimmering vein looking lines running through his skin. A memory of his childhood friend Will being bitten by a snake once and the venom left behind in his arm surfaced to his mind as he noticed how similar they were to each other.
"You can't help me," he said, his voice closer to normal than it had been, if a bit sad. "There's nothing you can do."
Merlin furrowed his brow at the lord's voice. It sounded much younger than it usually did, leaving Merlin wondering how old the lord was. How old did you have to be to be a lord anyways?
Merlin thought about his magic that was swirling just underneath the surface. There might be something that he could do to help Lord Edward, even if he didn't know what was wrong in the first place. If magic hadn't been illegal, then Merlin could possibly do something to help him. Sadly it was though, and he wasn't sure he wanted to go around trying magic on a lord of Camelot.
"I could try," Merlin said, hoping that his voice wasn't as thick or heavy as it had sounded. Slowly, so as not to startle the lord, Merlin reached a hand out. He let it hover in the space between them, hoping that Lord Edward would make the next move.
Quick as a flash of lightening, Merlin found himself pressed up against the door, a strong arm held across his neck to prevent him from moving or saying much. He was stunned for a moment, too stunned to do anything but gasp like a fish out of water and weakly try to pry the arm away. His eyes, still wide with shock, roamed up until he was staring into the lord's helmet where his face should have been.
The holes of the helmet were dark, making the lord's eyes appear to be slightly demonic. Merlin wondered what the actual color of the lord's eyes was, because the darkness of the helmet almost led him to believe that they were red.
His face must have shown his confusion and shock, because the color in Lord Edward's eyes seemed to flash with something similar to regret mixed with bitterness and a strange sense of acceptance. It was as if he was as surprised as Merlin about his actions.
"I told you, you can't help me. Now you can see why you wouldn't want to," he said. His iron lock hold against Merlin's neck began to relax and he backed up from him to give him some breathing room. His arm stayed raised toward Merlin's neck, ready to slam him into the door again if require to.
Merlin realized that the lord must had mistaken his shock and confusion that was mostly about his eye color as having to do with the way he had forced Merlin up against the door. And Merlin had been surprised, yet he was still more worried about what was wrong with the lord to be too mad at him for shoving him into the wall.
"No," Merlin said, taking a step forward, his neck again pressing against Lord Edward's arm. Merlin wanted to show him that he did still want to help, even if he wasn't sure what was wrong. He just wasn't actually sure how to go about doing so, so he did the only thing he could think of: he stepped closer to the lord.
He quickly wiped the look of horror that must have been on his face, hoping that it had a more neutral or concerned look on it instead. The lord's eyes widened at Merlin's actions, as if he couldn't believe them.
Maybe Lord Edward was sick. Maybe that was why he had all of those vein-looking marks and why he secluded himself way out in the forest. It would certainly make sense as to why Gaius was the one who delivered his supplies all the time.
Panic spread across Lord Edward's expression, suddenly deciding to go on the defensive. He backed away further from Merlin, although it didn't matter how much distance he put between them as Merlin took a step forward to match it. "What do you think you're doing? Get back," the lord said. He was like a caged animal, and Merlin knew better than to approach a caged animal. But this man standing in front of him had helped him, healed him, and –dare Merlin say it- rescued him from those bandits. Had Lord Edward not came along when he did, Merlin could have… well, Merlin knew that nothing good would have come of it.
"What's wrong? Are you sick?" Merlin asked. He winced when he realized just what he had asked and how crudely he had asked it. The man was obviously hiding his sickness with all of his heavy armor, which couldn't be healthy for him, all because he was too ashamed of it to allow Merlin to see. The last thing Merlin needed to do was point out how sick he was.
The lord seemed to notice how Merlin had flinched because he paused for a moment. Merlin took Lord Edward's pause to mean that he was angry about him questioning his sickness, so Merlin continued.
"You don't have to talk about it, really. Sorry, sometimes I just say things without really thinking and-"
Lord Edward brought him to a stuttering halt with a single raised hand. Merlin fainting realized that he'd been babbling on a bit like Gwen did when she got flustered, which had the situation not been so tense, he would have found amusing or annoying.
A tense silence filled the air, so thick that he could have sliced through it with a sword. Both of them froze, neither of them quite sure where they should go from there in that moment. Merlin debated whether he should try to speak up again, but he feared more babbling would fall out.
"It's… alright," Lord Edward said, although his tone spoke otherwise. His body was still tense, his hands still clenched and hanging between the two of them in a warning. He took a few feet back from Merlin, his head cocked to the side curiously.
"I didn't hurt you, did I? Just then?" He gave a short nod of his head to the door he had pressed Merlin up against. His discolored eyes holding something close to concern, although Merlin didn't think it was truly for him.
The back of his head was throbbing softly, some of the pain from busting his head on the forest floor coming back to him. His shoulder hurt too, giving a painful twinge every time he moved a bit in the wrong direction, but neither one of those seemed to be bad enough to worry Lord Edward with.
"No, I'm fine," Merlin said. Lord Edward raised an eyebrow at him, clearly doubting Merlin's words, but he wisely chose to ignore the doubt. Merlin was thankful for it, he wasn't sure he could handle another day of constant supervision and bed rest.
Lord Edward nodded his head to Merlin's words, but he seemed to be distracted. "That's… that's good," he said. His eyes roamed back up to meet Merlin's eyes, which seemed to be even bluer by comparison. He seemed rather uncertain about where to go from there or rather how to go forward with what he was thinking.
"So I guess since you're almost healed by now," he started hesitantly, "you'll be leaving soon?"
There was something in the lord's voice, something Merlin couldn't really place. It was hopeful yet sad. It was a combination that should never be heard in a person's voice if you asked Merlin.
Merlin considered his words for a moment. He probably should be on his way soon, just as he had been planning to before. Gaius and Gwen were probably worried sick about him by now, and who knew how many of his chores that he did for Gaius had piled up by now.
Yet there was that sadness in Lord Edward's voice that Merlin just couldn't ignore.
Why should he be in such a hurry to get back to a place that was hell bent on killing him for who he was born as? Everyone expect for Gaius would rather kill him then hear him out, if they really knew who he was.
When he thought about it that way, it was more than slightly questionable as to why he had ever been in such a hurry to get back at all.
He bit his lip as he looked into the lord's uncertain eyes, which were staring down at the ground. Occasionally they would flit up and meet Merlin's eyes, only to shoot off when he noticed that Merlin was still looking at him.
"I guess I don't have to leave so soon," Merlin said. The lord's eyes darted back to Merlin's, quickly looking onto his gaze. Merlin shrugged at the badly hidden look of shock on the lord's face, only to wince when it cause a flash of pain to go through his shoulder. That was something that he was going to have to get used to.
Merlin suddenly felt the need to explain himself. "I mean, those bandits could still be out there, and with this shoulder I'm not likely to be able to do anything against them," Merlin said although that wasn't exactly the truth. He had his magic, but it was risky to use it against anyone.
"It might be best if I laid low, at least until Gaius comes in a week," Merlin said. "That is, if it's alright with you," he quickly added on, hoping he wasn't actually imposing on the lord.
The lord relaxed, the tension draining from his body as he sighed. "Yes, I think that should be alright," he said.
It was the least growly Merlin had heard his voice so far.
XXX
God such a long chapter. I know that a lot isn't happening in my chapters, but that's because of how I told the story in one long drawn out tale, without really of thinking of how I would separate it into chapters.
Til Later!