Cuz when you're dialing her number just to hang up the phone

Driving cross town just to see if she's home

waking a friend in the dead of night, just to hear 'em say it's gonna be alright

When our finding things to do not to fall asleep cuz you know she's waiting in your dreams

That's when she's

More than a Memory

-Garth Brooks

Bella

This was bad. Really, really bad.

"Bella what are you doing?" Jason said, stepping down onto the grass.

"She was helping me with the tractor and she fell. Twisted her ankle pretty bad," Edward said, his body visibly tensing up.

I turned my face towards him, completely shocked that he was lying for me. Isn't this what he had wanted all along? A few words and Jason could be out of the picture for good. Why didn't he take that chance when he had it?

"I'll go get some ice…" Charlie huffed and walked into the house.

Edward carried me up to the porch and set me on the swing, propping my leg up beside me. Jason quickly sat down next to me, pulling my hurt ankle onto his lap to examine it.

"Geez Bella it's swollen already…" He ran his fingers softly across it. Charlie returned quickly with a bag of ice and placed it on my ankle.

"Well Bella I would say you usually aren't so accident prone…but you are so." He placed his hands on his hips. "I was a little bit surprised when Jason showed up though. I didn't know you had plans with him tonight." His eyes glanced towards Edward. "Maybe you should just stay in tonight with your ankle."

"No Charlie I think she should go." Edward crossed his arms in front of him and looked down at the ground. What the hell was going on?

"You do?" Charlie and Jason said in unison.

"Yeah. I mean you did have plans. And she'll be fine as long as she stays off her ankle. You aren't planning on running a marathon or anything right?" He smirked towards Jason.

"Um. No. I was actually just going to get us some ice cream and watch a movie at my place."

"There ya go. Perfect date. It's all settled." Edward stomped into the house.

I stood speechless at the scene that had just played out in front of me. Did Edward just basically insist that I go out with Jason?

"So are you ready to go?" Jason stood up and offered me his arm.

"Um, in a minute. I need to go grab something inside, you can just wait in the truck." I stood up and hopped inside, right to Edward's room.

"What the hell is this?" I yelled as soon as I closed his door.

"What's what?" He was laying on his bed with his hands behind his head.

"This! Why are you telling me to go out with him?"

"Because I sincerely want you to. Because I know that you still really love me. And because I know that you'll be thinking of me the entire time you're with him."

"Did you just Jedi Mind Trick me?" I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Maybe." He smiled in my direction.

"You make no sense Edward. One minute you're groping me on a tractor and the next you're pushing me into my kind-of casual boyfriend's arms. What is it with you?"

He shrugged his shoulders in a way that just irritated the shit out of me.

"Fine!" I tried to stomp my foot, which is nearly impossible when you're only on one leg. "Have a lovely evening then." I turned and hopped out of the room.

"Don't be out too late Bells," Charlie said as I started out the door. My anger from Edward had just reached its breaking point and it was about to be unleashed on Charlie.

"You know what Dad. I'm a grown ass woman. I've been married and divorced. And whether you like to think about it or not, I've had sex okay? So I will come home when I damn well please. Hell I might just stay at Jason's tonight. I'm not a little girl anymore, so stop treating me like I'm twelve!" I slammed the door behind me and made my way out to the truck.

I was still breathing heavily from my outburst as I pulled myself into Jason's truck.

"Are you okay?" He put his arm around my shoulder.

"No," I answered softly.

"Is this a vanilla and sprinkles occasion or a triple chocolate fudge with whipped cream and chocolate sauce occasion?"

I started laughing and my mood instantly lifted. I was going to try and have fun tonight, and despite what Edward said I was not going to think of him. Well except for right now. He was out of my head until tomorrow. Hopefully.

Edward

I almost broke down the moment Bella closed the door behind her. I really did want her to go. And I really did want her to have fun with Jason. In my fucked up mind it made sense to me for her to go. But that didn't mean it didn't drive me crazy and make me want to punch the damn wall.

I quarantined myself in my room for the next hour, wishing that she would come back. I knew if I called her and told her to come back that she would. All I had to do was dial seven numbers and she'd be back in my arms. I got to six and hung up the phone.

Emmett and Jasper burst into my room after my third attempt to call her.

"Did Bella really leave with Jason?" Emmett said, motioning out towards the driveway.

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because I told her to."

Jasper closed the door and sat down in the chair.

"So you told the woman you're in love with to go on a date with another guy?"

"Yes." I sighed.

"Why?"

"Because. I want her to miss me. I want her to want me so bad that she can't go with him. She wants me all the time when it's just us, but I need her to choose me over him. And she can't do that if she's never with him."

"But you realize that this could backfire on you, right Ed?" Emmett perched himself on the edge of the bed.

"Yeah. But if it does then I know that we weren't meant to be together." I banged my head up against the headboard.

"You're a weird motherfucker you know that?" Emmett said.

"Yeah I know. I'm irrational and don't make sense. But it's a test Em. If she still wants me while she's with him then we're worth fighting for."

"So it's not driving you insane that she's with him right now?"

"No it is. My skin is fucking crawling just thinking about it." I itched at my arms.

And then I started having second thoughts. Did I just fuck up again? Should I have told her no? To stay with me instead?

I jumped up in a panic and grabbed my car keys, flying out the door. I couldn't drive fast enough to Jason's house. It felt like my truck was just lurching along at a snail's pace. Like every minute on the clock was an hour. Like if I didn't get to her fast enough that I could lose her forever.

I came to a screeching halt outside his house and sat frozen in the seat. The curtains were pulled back and I could see into his house. They were sitting on the couch eating ice cream out of the same bowl. She smiled in his direction as he placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

My stomach started spasming as the dry heaves came. As soon as they came the tears came. I pounded on my steering wheel so hard that it broke clear off the stand. I looked back up at the house. The tears falling freely down my face blurred my vision, but I could see her. And she was laughing as she snuggled up next to him. She sure didn't look like I was even a passing thought in her mind. She was happy. Completely content. Without me.

I reached for my phone and dialed Jasper's number.

"Jazz I need you to come get me." I looked at my mangled steering wheel and decided there was no way I was driving home with it like that.

"Where are you?"

"In front of Jason's house," I said through my sobs. I've never cried this hard before in my life. I was not a crier. At all. But this hit me harder than anything ever has. It was like a rusty dagger through my heart, twisting and turning its way around, assuring that no life was left in me. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think, I couldn't feel. Anything. I clutched at my chest and waited for Jasper to get here.

He pulled up slowly ten minutes later and Alice hopped out the passenger's side.

"Edward why did you come here?" She said softly as she opened my door and pulled me out.

As soon as we were both back in Jasper's car, she pulled me to her. I grasped onto her shoulders, crying into her shirt while she rubbed up and down my arm, trying to comfort me.

My crying had ceased by the time we made it back home. No one spoke as Jasper parked his car and turned the ignition off. And then it was just silence all around me. I opened the door and muttered a soft "thank you" before going back into the house and into my room. I curled up in a ball on my bed and watched out my window for the headlights. Watched for her to come home. Watched for her to come back to me.

Bella

"Why don't you stay over tonight?" Jason said as he placed soft kisses down my neck.

"I can't. Charlie will kill me," I lied. I wondered if he heard my fight with Charlie. I had never planned to stay overnight here. I was just angry and it came out of my mouth before I could stop it. I felt terrible for leading him on like that.

"Oh. Okay. I'll take you home then." He slowly got up and collected his keys before leading me out to his truck.

The ride home was a little awkward and I didn't know why. We didn't really talk, which left me alone with my thoughts too much. They of course drifted to Edward and what he was doing right now. I wanted to tell him that I missed him. And that he was right. Every time Jason touched me or kissed me, I had wished it was Edward. I bit my lip and looked down at my hands.

I can't do this anymore, I thought to myself. Edward would always hold my heart and I couldn't deny it anymore. It didn't matter what happened in the past or what was happening now. We were supposed to be. And I didn't know why it took me so long to figure that out, but I knew it now. It wasn't going to be easy and we'd probably fight and yell and make each other mad as hell, but we'd make it back to where we used to be. Maybe even better than we were before. But I knew I had to cut this extra baggage if we had any chance at making it.

I cringed thinking about Jason as baggage. He was far from it. He was kind and loving and to be honest, if Edward and I had never been, Jason and I would be perfect for each other. But my heart was permanently flawed, in a good way. And there was no way it'd be any other way again. Edward's mark would be there always and forever.

I sighed deeply as Jason parked his truck in front of my house. I knew this was it. I was breaking up with him when he hadn't done anything wrong.

"Jason I need to talk to you about something…" I turned to face him.

"Okay…" He raised his eyebrow suspiciously and turned towards me.

"Listen. I'm not perfect; I'm far from it. I've been through a lot of things in my life and it's been really really hard for me to get over them…." I paused for a moment to collect my thoughts. "And some things have been going on recently and I just don't think…"

"Bella is that you?" Charlie called out, stepping onto the porch.

Dammit Dad, why do you always have the worst timing in the world?

He crossed the yard quickly and came to Jason's window.

"Hello Charlie," Jason said.

"Jason." Charlie nodded. "Thanks for dropping Bella off."

I took that as my cue to get out of the truck. I guess the heartbreaking will have to wait another day.

"I'll talk to you tomorrow…" I said to Jason, walking up to the porch with my dad. He smiled and started back down the driveway.

"Bells I'm actually really glad you did come back tonight. I want to apologize, for how I've been acting. I understand that you're an adult now and you can make your own decisions. It's just that I'm your dad, and you're my little girl and it's just my way to want to protect you okay?"

I smiled and hugged his side. "I know Dad. I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that, it wasn't okay." I shook my head in embarrassment.

"So how was your night?"

"Very…enlightening…" I muttered as we walked through the door.

I half contemplated going to Edward now, but I walked right up to my own room instead and went straight to sleep. It was too late for the conversation we needed to have. Epiphanies and declarations of love were better saved for another day.

A/N: So that chapter was a little frustrating. I mean here Edward is being all suave and sexy and then he pushes her off on some other guy. You have to admit his logic does makes sense, even if its fucked up sense. So now what? He loves her, she loves him. Everything should just be peachy right.... ; ) Or maybe slightly lemony? Made from concentrate, not real juice.