Chapter 10

Three Weeks Later

Sam knocked on General Hammond's door. She entered when she heard his invitation to come in. He had summoned her to his office and she was a little apprehensive about the reason for the call. Three weeks earlier, she had walked off the base without saying anything to anyone. She hadn't stayed away for long, only about 24 hours, but her actions had been irresponsible and she had apologized. He was far more understanding than he should have been, in her opinion, but she had been grateful and had redoubled her efforts on the gate-dialing program.

Three weeks earlier, she had just needed to get away for a while. All the stress had just gotten to her and she had just needed to get away. She'd left the mountain, gotten into her car and driven off. It had been a rainy, chilly October day. She'd driven and driven, with no particular destination in mind. At least, that was what she thought she had been doing. Before she knew it, though, she'd found herself parked in front of their house. She'd sat in the car for a while, not sure why she had driven to the house. Then she'd gotten out and walked past the deck and through the back yard to the trees lining the back of the yard. She'd continued on the path through the trees to the gazebo which overlooked the rocky shores of the lake. She was soaked by the time she reached the gazebo, but she didn't care. She had taken a seat and stared out at the lake. It was a bit choppy that day as the wind was blowing and leaves where flying around.

The gazebo was a place where she and Jack had enjoyed spending summer evenings. It was one of her favorite features of the property. It was also a place Sam liked to go when she wanted time alone. Sam felt the view of the lake was an awesome sight. It reminded her of Jack's cabin in Minnesota. It reminded her of summers spent with her family before her mom had died and it reminded her of summers spent at church camp after her mom had died. Religion had been a source of constant strife for Sam. Her mother had believed strongly and her father had insisted she and Mark continue their studies in church after her mother had died. Going to church had been a source of constant conflict, more so between her father and Mark. Sam had not regretted those years, though they caused her many hours of contemplation as she'd gone further into her studies in Math and Science.

She had always found a way to reconcile her religious beliefs with her scientific knowledge and then she'd learned of the Stargate Project. Meeting new civilizations whose entire belief systems were based on aliens with superior technology had caused her more hours of contemplation and had been the source for many a discussion with Daniel and occasionally with Teal'c. Jack usually chose to bow out of those discussions. She had again reached a comfortable compromise with her religious beliefs and her scientific knowledge and while she rarely visited an organized service in a church building, she chose to believe and question in her own time and way. She often felt moved to pray when she sat in the gazebo and that is just what she did that day. She'd prayed and listened and remembered.

Several hours later, wet, cold and feeling rather drained, she'd walked back to the house and entered. It had been at least a month since she'd set foot in the house and it had smelled a bit stale inside. She'd opened the sliding glass doors in the living room a crack to allow a little air in as she started a fire in the fireplace. Then she'd closed the slider and had gone to take a hot shower. She'd rummaged around and had found a pair of Jack's old sweat pants, one of his t-shirts, a sweatshirt and a pair of his socks and had put them all on. Then she'd returned to the living room to sit in front of the fireplace. She'd cried that day...for a long time. Then she'd returned to their bed and snuggled up to Jack's pillow and had fallen asleep. When she had returned the next day, she'd been told Janet and Teal'c had searched for her but that neither had thought to look at their house. She had returned with a nasty cold, had apologized for causing them to worry and had started back to work on the dialing program, feeling like she could wait for a while longer to hear from Thor.

When she received the call from General Hammond this morning, she had been at the base for another week straight. The only time she had left the base since her 24 hour AWOL was to play chess with Cassandra, for a night at the movies with Janet (she'd gone home to her house that night) and to treat Teal'c to a steak dinner after he'd returned from a mission with SG-6 (she'd stayed at her own house that night too). The rest of the past three weeks had been spent at the SGC and in retrospect, she had been growing more and more moody with each passing day. She'd snapped at Janet yesterday and had to apologize again. Sam was sure General Hammond was going to suggest she take a leave. She had been expecting this and had contemplated requesting one. She just could not stay away from the SGC for long. She felt sure she would be hearing from Thor any day.

As she entered General Hammond's office she noticed Teal'c was already there sitting at one of two chairs in front of the desk. The General motioned for her to take the other seat, which she promptly did.

"Major Carter, Teal'c," General Hammond said. "It is my pleasure to present you with a commendation for your actions in completing the rescue of the Tok'ra, Selmak. The heroism you displayed by establishing a wormhole connection and holding off the Jaffa as the refugees were evacuated along with members of SG-10 and SG-17 and then blowing up the ship Nirrti had been building and eliminating that threat to Earth has earned you this commendation.

"Thank you, General Hammond," Teal'c said as Hammond shook his hand and handed him a small box and envelop. Sam sat staring straight ahead with a confused look on her face.

"Major Carter," General Hammond said as he reached out to shake her hand, "Congratulations."

"We lost our commanding officer and we're getting commendations?" Sam asked at last. "I mean, we've saved the Earth before and all made it back alive...and this is what they choose to give us commendations for?"

"Major Carter," the General said, "you have received commendations in the past for other acts of bravery above and beyond the call of duty. This effort was no less appreciated."

"With all due respect, sir, I prefer not to accept this commendation," said Sam standing.

"Major Carter," General Hammond said. He could see Sam was near a breaking point again.

"Sir, permission to be excused?" Sam asked, trying hard to maintain her composure.

"I think perhaps you should take a little time off, Major," said Hammond after a few minutes of scrutinizing Sam. "Why don't you take a few days and get away from here. If you keep your cell phone with you, I promise we will contact you the second we hear anything from Thor or the other Asgard."

Sam shook her head, biting her lip. "Yes, sir, thank you sir," she managed to whisper out as she turned to leave his office. She returned to her office long enough to turn things off. She grabbed her clothes and coat from the locker room, not bothering to even change into her civvies and left the base. Snow was falling as she walked to her car. It had been falling for a few hours and a few inches had already accumulated on the ground. Sam was fighting tears again as she got into her car and started the engine. She turned the heater and defroster on full and started the windshield wipers to brush as much snow off the windshield as she could. Then she pulled out her scraper/brush combination and cleared the snow off both windshields. "November snow," she thought, "I used to like this stuff."

Sam drove away from the base again, not sure where she would go. She didn't want to go home. She found staying in her house alone to be more and more difficult all the time. Before long she found herself in front of their house again. She didn't wait long in the car this time. Instead she got right out and headed for the gazebo. She zipped her coat all the way up, pulled her scarf out of her pocket and wrapped it around her head and neck and pulled her gloves on as she walked.

The view from the gazebo was magnificent as the snow fell onto the water. The lake was calm that day and Sam thought it would not be long before she would be seeing the lake freeze over and skaters begin using the ice. She and Jack had played hockey on the lake many times since he'd gotten his new stick the Christmas before. The lake had not yet frozen, though and so the view was desolate...quiet and desolate. She sat on the bench and looked out at the lake. It had been nearly a month since she had done this the last time. Her mood had been brooding and angry, the lake had been tempestuous, the wind had been whipping...all quite different than the current conditions. The lake was calm, the wind was calm and Sam felt herself calming right along with them.

She prayed again...not the same as before, with desperation and guilt, questioning her decision to marry Jack, questioning her role in his fate, questioning whether or not she would ever see him again. This time she prayed asking for strength and patience to continue waiting, courage to continue believing he would return and giving thanks for the times they had already shared. She had found a peace sitting there that she had not thought would be possible to find while Jack was still gone.

Starting to shiver, she had turned slightly, planning on heading into the house to start another fire. She stopped though, as she noticed someone walking along the shore about 300 yards away. She looked once, started to turn away, and then had to look again. Then she looked harder and even from that distance, she recognized the walk.

Involuntarily, she sucked in a breath and held it as she continued to stare at the figure approaching on the shore. Her heart began pounding as though it wanted to come right out of her chest as she began to slowly walk down the rocky slope that lead to the shore of the lake, her eyes never leaving the approaching figure. When she reached the bottom of the slope, she could wait no longer and she began running toward the figure.

"Jack!" she yelled as she ran on the rocky shore, struggling to stay erect on the slippery surface. At the sound of his name, Jack's head popped up as he'd been watching where he planted his feet and he began running toward her. Sam slowed her approach as the distance between them disappeared. She walked closer, pulling her glove off her right hand, afraid he was an illusion that would vanish if she got too close.

"Jack?" she whispered as she reached out to gingerly touch his face. She felt cold, soft skin beneath her fingers and he reached up to cover her hand with his. He kissed her palm and reaching out he drew her into his arms. "Oh, God, it is you," she said and buried her face in his neck, not wanting him to see the tears that were now freely falling down her cheeks.

"More importantly, it's you," he said, placing one hand on the back of her head, squeezing her close to him with the other and kissing her head. Pushing her back slightly so he could see her face, he said, "it is you...you are real...right?"

She reached up and traced his lips with her fingertips and then met his lips with her own. Her lips trembled as she kissed him first gently, then with urgency.

"You're freezing," she said as she realized he was wearing only his BDUs and she began dragging him toward the house. "Let's get you in the house."

"Yeah...house..." he said, beginning to shiver, "because you know how I love the cold."

They didn't say anything else as they walked back to the house. It seemed to Sam the distance between the lake and the house had at least doubled since she'd walked to the gazebo earlier. She couldn't get Jack to the house soon enough. There were so many questions she wanted to ask him. She wanted to get him warm, be sure he was safe...

They finally reached the house and walked inside. Sam sent Jack straight to the shower as she went to check the thermostat and considered starting a fire in the fireplace. She also considered calling the SGC and letting them know he was back, but dismissed that thought. There was time for that later, she told herself. Instead, she returned to the bathroom to check on Jack. He was still in the shower, his left arm stretched out to the back wall, supporting a majority of his weight, head bowed and under the shower nozzle, allowing the steaming water to run over his head and down his back.

Sam looked at him through the frosty glass of the shower door. It had been so long...she had missed him so much. She needed to touch him, kiss him, reassure herself that he was real and he was back. She peeled off her own BDUs, grabbed another towel and placed it next to Jack's on the bench next to the shower. Then she opened the door to the shower.

Jack looked up as he heard the shower door open. He reached his hand out to take hers and pulled her into the shower with him. He pulled her into his embrace and swayed with her under the steaming water. Sam buried her face in his shoulder and began to sob. Relief surged through her as she realized he really was back and she could not stop crying. Jack held her as they warmed under the water. They stayed that way until the water began to run cool. Jack turned the water off and they exited the shower. Jack grabbed the towels and wrapped their bodies in the soft absorbent cloth without ever letting go of Sam. Then he led her into their bedroom where they crawled into bed and held each other.

Jack kissed Sam several times, whispering that everything would be alright, that he was back, that thinking about her was the only thing that had gotten him through their separation. She responded with kisses of her own and soon they were loving each other with tenderness and longing. They continued loving and holding each other for several hours before exhaustion overtook them. Both fought sleep as they were half afraid they would wake and discover they had been dreaming.

"Jack, how did you get here?" Sam asked, trying to focus her irritated, tired eyes on the deep brown eyes she had dreamed about every night since Jack had disappeared.

"It's really a long story, Sam. Are you sure you want to hear it now?" he asked, thinking she really needed to get some rest.

"I'm sure," she whispered as she gave up trying to look at him and snuggled her head into the crook of his arm.

"Well, I'm still a little confused about how, but Daniel actually visited me in dreams," Jack said.

Sam propped herself up on her elbow and looked at Jack from a greater distance, which made it easier to focus. "Daniel?" she asked, suddenly intrigued.

"Yeah, well, uh,...yeah. He told me about the Valkyries...they're the rebel Asgard who snagged me out of Nirrti's clutches and then kept me on that damn ship of theirs. He asked for my rings and my dog tags, and I don't know how he could do it, but I gave them to him while I was dreaming..." Jack paused as Sam suddenly jumped out of the bed and headed for the bathroom.

"Sam?" Jack called as he sat up, tempted to follow. Just as he was starting to move, she returned. She climbed back into bed beside him and held out her closed hand. He gave her a questioning look and then held out his hand, palm open. She placed his dog tags and ring in his hand, smiling through wet eyes.

"Ah, you see, he said he would get them to you..." Jack said rubbing his hands over the metal objects he'd hoped had found their destination.

"He did," she whispered, "go on."

"Well, he also placed a picture of a device in my mind and told me I would need to disable it if I ever wanted anyone to find me. He said he thought you would convince the Asgard to begin a search."

"It didn't take much convincing. Thor began searching as soon as he heard the news, but he didn't bother to let me know he suspected the Valkyries until after I showed him those," she said nodding toward the objects he had since put back in their proper places.

"Well, you know how vague these superior races can be," said Jack, trying to inject a modicum of humor into their discussion.

"Yeah..." she said, closing her eyes and snuggling back into the crook of his arm. "So...you found a way to disable the device?"

"Yeah...Daniel showed up again just before everything went down. He told me timing was important and that I needed to find the device soon. I started walking toward what I thought was the bridge of the ship and darned if ol' Freya did just flash me in. We were playing this game of "what do you want to know" when some sort of alarm went off. They were all distracted so I looked around, found something heavy and smashed the device with it. I think Freya was a little stunned that she'd misjudged me, but that was the last I saw of her as Thor flashed me up to his ship. Then we had to chase the Valkyrie ship for a time, but eventually Thor transported all of the Valkyries off the ship. He dropped me off at the lake, because I didn't know where you'd be and I didn't want to see anybody else first. I thought it would be easier to approach the house from the lakeside. I knew no one would be out in this weather...but then, there you were."

"Hmm, hmm," Sam murmured as she could fight sleep no longer. Jack smiled as she snuggled in closer and he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. He lay back and stared at the ceiling, still not wanting to sleep. He lay there for several hours, thinking, caressing Sam and smiling before he finally drifted off to sleep too.

Sam woke at the sound of the phone ringing. Jack began to stir as she tried, unsuccessfully, to extricate herself from the bed without disturbing him. She reached over to the phone on the bedside stand and picked up the handset.

"Hello," she said into the receiver.

"Sam?" Janet's inquired through the earpiece.

"Yeah, hi Janet...what's up?"

"Nothing really, I just wanted to be sure you were OK. I tried your cell, but apparently you haven't been carrying it. I drove by your house and found you weren't there. I drove by your other house this time and saw your car, but all the lights were out last evening, so I decided not to disturb you until this morning."

"Hmm, oh, yeah, I've been sleeping, sorry..."

Janet let out a sigh of relief as she realized she had made the right decision the night before.

"Well, you probably needed to sleep. I'm glad you got some rest. I was just a little concerned when you didn't answer your cell. I would have thought you would have it glued to you waiting to hear news from General Hammond."

"Uh, yeah, guess I was more tired than I thought when I got out of the car last night. I must have left it in the car." Then Sam noticed the clock next to the phone. "Oh wow, it's 11:00 already?"

"Yeah, well, you didn't think I'd call and wake you early did you?" Janet asked chuckling. "I knew you were exhausted. I'm glad General Hammond was able to persuade you to take some time off."

"Yeah, I definitely needed some time away," said Sam as she turned to stare at Jack, who had closed his eyes and was resting comfortably again. "Listen, Janet, I'll probably be at the SGC again in a few hours. I just need a little more time, OK?"

"Sure, hon. I wasn't trying to rouse you back to work. I just wanted to be sure you were OK. I thought maybe you'd be interested in seeing a movie with Cassie and I this evening."

"Maybe," Sam said, not wanting to share her news with anyone just yet. "If I don't see you on base, give me a call later, OK?"

"OK, Sam, talk to you later," said Janet just before Sam hung up the phone and rolled back over to snuggle and kiss Jack, hoping to wake him gently.

"Ol' Doc Fraiser checkin' up on you, is she?" Jack said softly as he leaned in and nuzzled her ear.

Sam giggled slightly. "Yes, she and Teal'c are like two mother hens who won't let this chick wander very far out of their site."

"Wise hens," murmured Jack as he continued nuzzling his way down her jaw line. He began placing soft kisses on her neck and a low growl escaped him as he felt her body begin to respond to his caress. "God, I missed you," he whispered.

"No more than I missed you," she whispered back just before his mouth found hers and they sought to make their bodies one.