"Oh my god, I've been so worried about you!" Shadow said the next day, wrapping her arms around Fallon tightly. "If it's not one thing it's another."
Fallon stepped out of the embrace smiling. "No kidding." She fluffed her hair, showing off the newly acquired purple streaks. "So what do you think?"
"I don't know, the red suited you better."
"I'm thinking blue next."
Shadow snorted. "You're a trip, you know that?"
"I've been told."
"Fallie!"
Fallon turned to find a streak of blue, purple and green lunging at her and the next thing she knew she was being tackled to the concrete mall floor. "Jeffrey Nero Hardy!"
Jeff laid sprawled on top of her, resting his chin on the palm of his hand comfortably. "Hello Fallon, what's up?"
"My temper." She warned, trying not to smile.
"Oh really?" Jeff's eyes widened innocently. "What's got you ticked off today?"
"I don't know. I guess it would be the fact that some dumb moron is laying on me."
Laughing, Jeff got off her and helped her up. "Not happy to see me?"
"I'm thrilled."
Jeff turned and hugged Shadow. "Long time, no see Shade."
"Shadow. It's Shadow, how many times do I have to tell you that?" Shadow shook her head exasperatedly. "All right, I'll catch you guys later, I promised to meet Kane for lunch."
Fallon and Jeff watched her walk off.
"So what's up?"
Fallon shook her head. "Nothing, just doing some shopping."
"Hey, so was I." Jeff grinned impishly. "Mind if I join you?"
***
Fallon and Jeff spent the next hour wandering around buying everyday clothes and work clothes along with other things. Fallon had forgotten how much she enjoyed his company, he was funny and entertaining, not too mention overly hyper.
By the end of the day Fallon's ribs were hurting from laughing so much.
"Let's go grab a bite to eat." Jeff suggested as they loaded all their bags into the trunk of her rental car.
"All right but uh… what about your ride?"
"Matt will come get it eventually." Jeff shrugged, slipping into the passenger side.
Fallon shook her head and got in as well. "You are definitely off the wall, you know that?"
"I've been told a time or two." He agreed cheerfully.
***
"Okay now, let's see if I got this straight," Jeff said an hour later, spearing a biscuit on the end of a fork and waving it around. "You and ol' man Callaway are married, estranged but married. And then Sid is wanting you to be his… woman… again."
Fallon took a sip of her coffee. "Yeah, that sounds about right."
"And you were seeing Chris but that's over…" Jeff shoved the biscuit in his mouth whole, chewed and swallowing before continuing. "So now where are you and Mark at?"
"You are so disgusting sometimes, you know that?" Fallon made a face, pushing her own half empty plate away. "We're separated right now if you must know. We're friends at the moment."
"That's messed up." Jeff finally remarked, cramming more mashed potatoes into his mouth. "So ya'all are married but uh… separated, just being friends."
Fallon idly picked at her cornbread. "Yeah well, it's kind of hard to get divorced in the county we live in, believe me, I checked. I need a real reason and when I said it was forced, they just believed that it was a staged thing for the Fed, they thought we really got married but just pretended all that shit."
"That is fucked up."
***
"So what're your plans for tomorrow?" Jeff asked as he walked Fallon up to her hotel room.
"Don't know yet, I'm not doing the house show, that's for sure."
"Want to go do something?"
"Yeah, okay." Fallon smiled at him, unlocking her door.
"Good. Be ready around nine then."
***
When Fallon answered the door the next morning it wasn't who she was expecting.
"You look nice." Mark took in her faded blue jeans and purple belly shirt. "Going somewhere?"
"Um yeah…" Fallon ran a hand through her hair. "Actually, Jeff is supposed to be picking me up soon."
Mark raised his eyebrows. "Really?"
"Yes, and listen; don't start that husband shit either."
He started looking a little ticked off.
"I know we're married but it's not a real marriage you know?" Fallon stared up at him. "It's just until I can figure out a way to either get a divorce or an annulment."
"Right. And how were you planning on doing that without my consent?"
Fallon looked a bit hurt. "You mean after everything we've just gone through you still would make me do this?"
"What made you think I'd ever let you go?"
"Whatever Mark." Fallon slammed the door in his face.
***
"Oh god Jeff," Fallon shrieked. "How did I let you talk me into this?"
Jeff grinned at her. "I don't know, my southern charm I suppose."
"Hardy, I've known you since you were in diapers, don't pull that shit with me!" Fallon screamed as the roller coaster began it's descent.
When they got off the coaster, Fallon was dizzy, clinging to Jeff for support. "That was awesome."
"Yeah, and you scream like a baby." He teased.
Fallon rolled her eyes. "How bout we go on the ferris wheel?"
"All right."
There wasn't a long line so they were on it quickly and soon stuck at the top as the carnie loaded some more people. Fallon peered over the edge and laughed, waving down to the people who were staring up at them.
"Hey Fallie, can I ask you something?" Jeff asked innocently.
"You know you can." She turned to face him.
"Have you ever had sex in one of these?"
***
"That was interesting." Jeff commented as they stepped off the ferris wheel. "We really need to go on that again."
Fallon grinned over at him, finishing buttoning her jeans. "Maybe later. Now I'm hungry."
"Me too. How bout a slice of pizza?"
Fallon led the way over, laughing as he playfully slapped her ass. "You are so bad, you know that?"
"Yeah yeah yeah. You've told me a million times over." Jeff ordered and paid for their food before sitting down at a nearby table to wait. "So, what next?"
She sat down next to him. "Maybe some games. I'm getting ridden out."
"I can believe it." He winked at her.
***
It was to Edge and Christian's great surprise when their opponents for the tag team title match were introduced.
Jeff and Fallon came running down the ramp, each clad in cargo pants and purple tank tops to match their hair.
***
It was also a surprise to many in the back, mostly Mark. He stared at the monitor, feeling his hurt and rage building up.
It was an even bigger surprise when Jeff and Fallon won the belts.
***
"Great, now I have two titles to defend." Fallon joked as they walked backstage, the belts over their shoulders.
"Oh yes, I'm sure it'll really kill you." Jeff replied, rolling his eyes playfully. "You know, all you do is bitch bitch bitch."
"I've been told that before." Fallon smirked, waving to Kane as he disappeared into his locker room, grinning when he flashed her a thumbs up. "Did you hear the news?"
"Nuh uh."
"Shadow and Kane are having a baby."
"You're kidding!" Jeff halted to gape at her.
Fallon shook her head. "Nope. Shadow told me about it last night. Awesome isn't it?"
"Definitely, we'll have to do something for them. Maybe throw a baby shower."
"We?"
"Hey, they're my friends too ya know."
"Oh yeah, I forgot."
"Seems you do that a lot."
Fallon slapped his upper arm. "You are such a jerk sometimes, you know that?"
"Yep." Jeff rubbed his arm. "That hurt."
"My, don't you two look cozy."
Jeff and Fallon turned to find Mark leaning against a wall staring at them coldly.
"What's up?" Jeff asked cautiously, shifting from one foot to the other.
"Not much, just watching my wife be a whore, as usual."
"Fuck you Mark!" Fallon spat. "You need to get over your jealously kick."
"Better yet, why don't you divorce her?" Jeff put in.
"Mind your own business boy." Mark snarled. "This don't concern you."
"Fallon's my friend Mark, when you're harassing her, it concerns me."
Fallon stamped her foot impatiently. "Listen hear Mark, I'm sick and tired of all this. Thanks for helping me with Sid. He's gone now up into a state hospital so there's no reason for us to be hanging out, pretending to be married. Let's just end this charade."
Mark took a threatening step towards the pair. "Hear me well Fallon because this will be the last time I say this: I am not giving you up. You're mine. Mark my words, you'll be back with me before long or else."
***
"I hate him!" Fallon screamed later in the evening once she and Jeff had reached the house he shared with his brother Matt in Cameron. "I just wish he'd leave me alone!"
Matt walked into the kitchen. "What's all the screaming about? Hey Fallie, long time no see."
Fallon nodded irritably at him, finishing off her can of Mountain Dew and crushing it in her hand.
Jeff looked at his brother helplessly. "Her husband is being a dick, like usual."
"Mark? I thought you two were divorced."
"Hell no, the fuck wad won't grant me one and in our county it has to be a mutual thing."
Matt nodded. "I see. Um… so…"
"Hope you don't mind Mattie but I'm spending the weekend here." Fallon said teasingly. "My old apartment was sold out from underneath me."
"No problem, it'll be just like old times right?"
"Yeah, only now I don't have to sneak in through the second story window."
Jeff snorted. "I doubt you could in those shorts."
She looked down at her skintight daisy dukes. "Ah bite me."
"Maybe later." Jeff rifled in the refrigerator, looking for a snack. "So, what're we doing tonight?"
"Nothing."
"Good. I thought maybe we could grill out and just knock back a few cold ones."
"That sounds heavenly." Fallon sighed wistfully.
"Definitely." Matt agreed. "Course that means you'll need to go do some grocery shopping."
"Wanna come Fallie?" Jeff asked, grabbing his truck keys off the counter.
"Yep, be back in a while Mattie."
***
"So what are we grilling?" Fallon asked, staring at the meats.
"Um, steak or hamburgers?"
"Steak."
Jeff examined a couple of packages before tossing them into the cart where a case of pop already sat. "Now we need some tater salad, chips and uh… what else?"
"Charcoal, lighter fluid…" Fallon recited from the list Matt had given them. "And beer, lots of beer."
"Funny, last I remembered you couldn't handle your alcohol."
"Heh. It's been awhile since you drank with me Mr. Hardy."
***
"That was awesome." Matt sighed, rubbing his stomach contentedly. "Pass me a beer, will ya Jeff?"
Jeff reached over his lawn chair and into the cooler. He tossed a can of Bud to Matt and then one to Fallon. "This sure as hell beats work."
"No kidding." Fallon popped the tab on hers and took a long swallow. "I'm beginning to hate work."
"Shut up. You're holding one half of the tag team titles." Matt chastised.
"Hey it's not my fault they decided to break you boys up."
"So where are you sleeping at?" Matt asked, changing the subject.
"Guest room obviously."
"Not going to crawl in bed with me?" Jeff teased.
Fallon shot him a knowing look. "Boy, we've been doing that ever since we were teenagers, don't you think you're a little too old for that?"
Matt snorted. "If I remember rightly, you two were going at it every night since you turned twelve and thirteen, what's the big deal now?"
Fallon blushed while Jeff grinned broadly.
***
"Okay, let me get this straight, you two want me to move in?" Fallon stared at Matt and Jeff incredulously. "Why?"
Matt smiled at her. "Why not Fal? You've been practically living with us ever since we met, why not just have you move in formally?"
"Besides, where are you going to go?" Added Jeff reasonably. "Back to Mark? You'd be safer here with us and besides: You know you liked being around me, I'm irresistible."
Matt and Fallon both rolled their eyes.
"All right, I'll do it."