Chapter 10
Madara
It had been a good thing she was so strong – otherwise, it would have been hard to carry him all the way to the house.
Now, he was leaning on the wall, still unconscious. She could have woken him up, but she needed a little time alone. Besides, she wouldn't have liked him to think she cared. The clew in her stomach was making her uncomfortable and she was well-aware that he was the cause of it. Due to her contradictory sentiments, she was feeling like she was going insane.
She hadn't dealt with such emotions for quite some time now. What's more, there have never been this feeling directed towards the enemy – which was making the situation worse.
She knew that if he had had any idea, he would have immediately taken advantage of his position. She couldn't afford being trapped in his net. She was anyway indulging herself by growing attached to him – their fights, whether verbal or physical, were forcing them to be closer. And she was not as disappointed as she should have been.
Her mind was telling her to back off – fast and without hesitation. There was nothing she could do or ought to have done for him. She was nice enough considering he had devastated the five nations.
But then, there was her stupid and naïve heart! It was screaming that she must get to know him better, that there was more than his cool façade. She was trying to push it aside, but the forceful beat wouldn't just go away.
She was deluding herself. She was interested in Madara Uchiha. Despite his cruel actions, she was still prepared to hear his side of the story. She was feeling that there was more to it. The real question was if she was able to back down after she'd heard what he had to say.
She could just hope he would prove her he was a monster. However, by now Sakura got to see another face of the infamous Madara – he could also be gentle and soft. It was the pain she had observed in his rare smiles, which raised some questions.
`Why do I have to always choose the wrong guy?` she asked herself, feeling miserable.
She seemed to have a natural inclination for haunted souls, bad guys who followed the path of darkness. It was not healthy at all.
A grunt caught her attention, waking her up from the reverie. She watched cautiously as Madara's face twitched, and he massaged his forehead. Then his nose frizzed.
`What's this smell?`
`Special tea. Drink. It will ease your headache.`
She really had no idea what would happen when he'd be awake. The move she had used was for killing, not for buying time. But she could control her chakra perfectly, so she had no doubt it would be all fine. Taking into consideration that stopping one's heart couldn't feel good, she had made a tea which proprieties would aid in case of a headache, soreness, dizziness and vomiting. She was one hell of a doctor. She wouldn't allow any errors.
She gave her a look but made no comment whatsoever. He got up and walked towards the table. Sakura's breath caught in her throat. He was so imposing and manly.
Damn it! He's making me feel like a twelve-year-old girl all over again.
He took the cup and blew easily. Closing his eyes, Madara took a sip of the strange mix. Its smell was anything but subtle, but it wasn't disturbing. And it actually tasted like apples. He was aware that the pink-haired kunoichi was staring at him, but he was ignoring her.
She had caught his eye and the fact that she had been able to defend him had topped it all. Never had he ever thought such a petite girl could prove herself such a challenge. It was refreshing. Not once had Madara wished of ravishing her. But he always let those thoughts go, as they were dangerous for both of them.
Little did he know that she was staring at his lips, letting exactly those thoughts wander through her head. She couldn't help herself wanting to taste him once more. The fact that he was so calmly licking his bottom lip was not helping with her fantasies.
Sakura remembered their last encounter perfectly, and she knew he was skilful with his tongue. She could just wonder what other things he could do with it…
She shut her eyes close, breathing loudly. Too bad she couldn't see his smirk – maybe anger was the solution for all her problems. Madara was doing it all on purpose. It was doing well to his pride to know he was not the only one affected. Yet, from the two of them, she evidently needed more persuasion.
`You had a question…` He said vaguely, forcing her to meet his eyes.
Sakura seemed undecided in his opinion, and he couldn't understand why. Didn't she know what she wanted to ask from the beginning? Had it been a spontaneous thing?
Truth to be spoken, the problem was that she had too many. Their bet was clear – she got to ask just one. The Haruno kunoichi had a hard time deciding which one interested her the most.
She wanted to know why he had given her the opportunity to win, why he was nice, what made him come up with such a plan as the Tsukuyomi, why he was so enigmatic. Drat it! She wanted to know why he wouldn't get out of her mind.
But she needed to think like a ninja. Asking these questions would not give her any advantage. Even if it meant she was a bitch, she had to have an ace underhand for later. Sakura needed to know something very personal, something that would not only give her a hint about how he thinks, but also about what his weaknesses might have been.
Think. Think about all those History classes, Sakura! What do you know about him?
`We can have this discussion later if you wish for it.` He stated, already trying to stand up.
Stop being nice and polite, you Uchiha!
`No.` she yelled, catching his wrist. `I mean, I would like to speak now.` Sakura continued, a little embarrassed.
He found the shade of rose from her cheeks very interesting. Escaping from her hold, he squeezed her hand, assuring her that it's fine.
He waited patiently, which only annoyed her more. He was so different from Sasuke – and it was impossible for her not to compare the two of them as they were the only Uchiha with whom she had interacted.
Her eyes enlarged slightly, and Madara took it as a bad sign. Maybe it hadn't been such a good idea to take that bet.
A few moments of silence filled up the air… and the she threw the bomb.
`Why did you tried to destroy Konoha?`
He looked at Sakura as if she had grown a second head. He had not been prepared for it.
Izuna's face crossed his mind, and his lips thinned involuntarily. At the sight of his pained expression, she almost wanted to take back her words. She clenched her fist, refraining from doing so. It would serve her no benefit.
`Konoha should have never existed in the first place.` He declared.
It made Sakura frown. Now, he was speaking nonsense.
`What do you mean?`
`I think we had decided for one question. You had asked, I had answered.`
`No-no, Uchiha. You must elaborate. You cannot consider that a proper answer. Besides, you do not say such things without adding further information. It's misleading.`
`How old are you, Sakura?`
Her name on his lips made her shiver.
`Eighteen.`
`So young` he said, meditating. `Listen to me. You have not yet tasted life's bitterness yet. You're still hopeful, innocent, and pure, in comparison with me. But there will be a time when you understand my words, so listen carefully: the more you live, the more you realize that the reality is just made of pain, suffering and emptiness.`
She looked dazzled. Sakura couldn't thing of the things he had been through if he could have been so hopeless. Never in her life had she met someone so determined to ignore the brightness.
Her heart tightened. She felt the urge to put her hand on top of his, to try and ease his pain. But it wasn't possible. She knew too well that when the interior was burning, it didn't matter that on the outside one was drowning.
`It's sad you think so. Tell me, Uchiha. What did make you follow this path?`
`It's a long story.` He said, looking incredulous.
He couldn't believe she was so foolish not to see the truth in front of her eyes.
`Well, as you can see, I'm not going anywhere.`
He had no intention of bringing up Izuna. He hated her question and her insistences. Moreover, Madara didn't like to speak about his family – it hurt. Had he been able to escape such a situation, he would have had. But her tone held a very sincere worry, which made him think twice.
Sakura didn't know what had made him change his mind, but when he started speaking she didn't interrupt him – she did not even shown a triumphant smile.
`Those were harsh times. Nothing you could ever imagine. The war seemed to never stop. People were killing each other without remorse, not out of power, but out of fear. Letting a possible future enemy alive was something inadmissible. You may think you know what the war means… and maybe you'd be right to an extent. But at last, from what I've understood, the nations have united.
Now, it would have been hard to do such a thing considering the amount of clans that had existed in that period. And I don't know whether you're aware or not, but the clan's wheal should always come first. So there was no point in having strong clan as Uchiha or Senju help the minorities.`
`It would have been a poor strategy.` She mumbled under her breath.
Madara continued as if he hadn't heard her comment. `I met Hashirama by accident. Eventually, I figure it out he was a shinobi. He was this embodiment of youth and ambition; although he lacked confidence in his skills and was slightly depressed. We started meeting often after that encounter. We fought, we laughter, we shared dreams… But we had never had enough trust in one another to actually tell our names.
You see, even as children, we were forced to grow up fast. War waits for no one. Being part of a famous clan may not be as easy as you may think. There was a lot of pressure. I felt… relieved to know that there was someone who bore the same burden on his shoulders. It made me feel less lonely, and more child-like. We were having some sort of bond. I was frustrated that he was better than me and he managed to beat me up a couple of times, but I was also glad for him. Does it even make sense?` He asked himself, not really expecting an answer.
The discussion was forcing him to face his past. And even if Madara had never run from a fight, he wasn't looking forward to this one. It was still not easy to accept some fact. The Uchiha was surprised by how natural the words did come on his tongue. It didn't seem bizarre to tell the green-eyed medic all the details. If anything, he felt lighter. He had done many mistakes and had brought misery to many souls, but he was not a monster. He could not stand the fact she might have thought so.
He had not cared about other's opinion in a long time. However, something was different with her. He couldn't put into words what was amiss.
She wanted to respond – to tell him that she had seen it before – but the words wouldn't roll out of her tongue. He seemed lost in memories and Sakura didn't dare to disturb him.
`Our clans found out. Both of them, obviously without the other's knowledge, decided to set up a scam. I found it out and so did Hashirama. There was a thing about throwing rocks we had. We had written a warning onto the rocks and then exchanged them. We hurried to left the scene, but then our family appeared, namely our fathers and brothers. The parents aimed for the other's children and that how we found ourselves engaged in a battle. I have lost more than one brother and it was the same for Hashirama. We would have done anything to protect our little brothers, even if it meant killing the one that had understood us. My father decided that we withdraw and that left the Senju alive. Then…`
`I don't understand. You are a powerful clan. Why did your father choose to take a step back?`
His teeth clenched resoundingly and Sakura wondered what she had said wrong. He was prideful, but it couldn't be the motive besides his strange reaction.
Madara was somehow ashamed that he had shown so much emotion then. It went against the roughness their parent had taught them. He didn't want anyone to know that he had actually shown weakness in front of the enemy. He looked at Sakura and asked himself again if he made the right choice. He couldn't know the reasoning behind her interest.
He had no idea how much she knew about the Sharingan. As far as he was aware, she hadn't gotten the chance to study it very well. But there were always manuscripts, weren't there?
`It was the first time my Sharingan activated.` He murmured and when she looked her in the eye Madara knew that she realised what it had meant.
Her eyes were burning. For an Uchiha to activate his Kekke Genkkai he had to suffer a profoundly emotional-traumatizing experience. If Madara's had activated in that fight, it meant he had deeply cared for Hashirama.
She forced her tears to stay hide, certain that Madara wouldn't appreciate the gesture. She knew it was hard for him to speak of such things and her soothing tone would not do any good.
Now, she was feeling malicious. She regretted ever engaging him in the conversation.
`It's enough, Uchiha. I've heard enough.`
However, her deliberate harsh tone didn't waver his determination.
`He met years later, still on the battlefield. Tobirama wounded Izuna fatally. I run towards him as soon as I realised what had happened. However, ninja medics were rare and not very skilled; I was to find later that there was nothing to be done for my brother.`
Sakura felt the urge to scream. She had read such a scenario, she learnt them, and she knew there were still little villages which confronted with the above-mentioned problem. It was not fair! As a medic, she found the situation unacceptable.
She shouldn't have, but she pitied the poor man. He had lived a life full of misery. She couldn't deny that he was the bad guy, but still he had his own sad story.
Maybe asking that question hadn't been such a good idea after all.
Unaware of her tenseness, he continued.
`While Izuna was clinging onto me, Hashirama proposed me to set aside the hatred and to start anew. To build the village we have always dreamed of.`
He decided not to tell her that he had even thought of accepting. It was something that only he should know.
`Izuna… he was not agreeing. He made me promise I wouldn't do that.`
Sakura was dazzled. But for his little brother's request, Madara would have probably chosen another path in life. The constant thought of disappointing your family couldn't be easy to bear.
She looked at him as if it was the first time. She didn't see a monster or a mad-man. Instead, she saw a poor boy that had grown into a lost adult. She was darkness so thick that the light would be afraid to enter. She also saw loneliness – and quarrel.
It scared her.
It hit her so fast that she barely had time to catch her breath. He was still putting the blame on him.
`So you see,` he said as he intended to leave the room `the village should have never existed in the first place. It was just a mistake that… I've done in my naïve years.`
`Uchiha.` She called his name, not really knowing what she could tell. He stilled but made no movement to turn his face to her. His back was stiff and she cursed under her breath. Never had she thought the discussion would lead to this.
He gave her no time to think. A sad chuckled escaped his throat. `Now, now, Sakura. I think we're beyond such formalities; don't you?`
And the he left her alone, and she could almost see all the ghosts that haunted him. Too bad he was not there when she let that decisive sentence fill the air. Her tone was low and soft, but the damnation the words contained let room for no solution.
She was trapped – because she was actually starting to not bother about his past.
`I do, Madara.`