"Oh my god, Charles!" I shouted when I saw my brother. My mom had called me two days earlier and told me that she was bringing the family up to see me when I was in England for the first week.

"What up big sis?" he said as he gave me a hug.

"More like little sis. You tower over me now!" Charles had grown about three inches since he turned fifteen and Zoe was almost a teenager now at twelve! "Zoe, I've missed you so much!" I said as I hugged her.

"You too! I can't believe how long it's been since I've seen you. I can't believe you're in England!" she smiled.

"Crazy right?" I said.

"What's crazy is your hair? How did you do that?" My dad asked me. Since taking out my hair extensions my hair was now just above my shoulders and I dyed blue streaks into it. My mom brushed her fingers through it.

"Its part of a new image I'm trying out." I told my family. "I'm so sick of having straight, long blond hair all the time."

"Whatever you say," my mom said. "So I spoke to Lynne earlier on the phone and she says that she is coming with Freddy to London this week because he has a concert here. Isn't that great? We can all have lunch and hang out; maybe we can see the palace…"

"You can see the palace," Charles said. "Wonder probably has a bunch of promotional stuff to do,"

"Yeah I do." I smiled apologetically. "How did you know?"

"Henry next door told me that you've been e-mailing him about your psycho schedule." Charles replied.

"Yeah, I miss him! Tell him I say hi when you go home." I told Charles and Zoe.

Later that day, mom and the gang followed me to a press conference I had with the English Media. "How do you feel about Eminem's new song? Are you pissed off?" one of them asked me.

"I'm not actually sure why he has such animosity towards me. Apparently I said something on TV that made him angry, but whatever it is that I said I don't take it back." I replied. I didn't. I wanted others to understand that going through physically abusive relationships was never okay. I didn't want anyone to go through what I had to go through.

"Are you dating anyone right now?" another critic asked.

"My career is my boyfriend. It takes up all of my time." I answered. Okay, so it wasn't exactly true, but I wasn't ready for the whole world to know that Freddy and I were dating. It's kind of a private thing.

"How old is your sister?" Somebody asked. "Is she going to follow in your footsteps?" I looked over at my sister who was sitting next to me.

"Talk to them" I whispered to her.

Zoe smiled confidently and grabbed the microphone. "I'm Zoe Blake and I'm 12 years old. I love to sing and dance but I'm not going to follow my sister. I'm going to make my own career." She winked.

My jaw dropped. I couldn't believe how outspoken she was. I always thought Zoe would be a star, just because she was so outgoing and she was talented as well. "What kind of career?" the man asked.

"I'm going to be a famous actress." She told them without missing a beat.

"Why did you say something about that Eminem song?" Tig asked me after the press conference.

"They asked me, I just answered the question." I said.

"That wasn't bad, but you have to be careful when there are cameras on you like that." Tig told me. "They can twist your words."

"We don't need any controversies." Steve added. "You need a clean image."

"Wonder, I really don't like how this boy is saying such nasty things about you. It's horrible." My mom told me.

Then my dad said, "If you want I can get on a plane to wherever this kid is and kick his ass."

I laughed. "No, dad, that's not necessary. Whatever, he makes fun of everybody. It's okay. I don't take it personally." I replied.

"That's a good way to look at it." Tig pointed out.

Steve sighed. "You can't start taking shit from random mainstream rap punks now, because others will just follow his example later. You need to stand up for yourself."

"Didn't you just say I didn't need to start drama?" I asked. Steve was a good manager, but sometimes the things he said were a bit… retarded. It had become a sort of tradition for Tig and I to ignore what he says.

"Exactly, that's why we need to handle this in private. We should probably call up this rap boy's management and give them a piece of our minds…"

"That's not necessary for now." Tig said.

My mom didn't really appreciate witnessing the whole business part of my career. She told me it was a lot harder than I made it look. No kidding. What my mom did enjoy was seeing Lynne, Freddy's mom, again.

"They are like perfect for each other!" Lynne dished to my mom as they sat in the kitchen of the enormous suit Freddy had.

"I know right. Wonder is the princess and Freddy is the prince of pop music!" My mom responded.

Freddy and tried I not to crack up as we eavesdropped on them from the living room. "That's what all those teen magazines call us." Freddy said.

He was right. I had seen it all over the place. "I don't get how there are rumors about us dating. How could they know?" I asked.

"They are sneaky like that." He told me. "It makes sense if you think about it. Everyone in the business knows, even Dean was asking me about it the other day. I wouldn't be surprised if another celebrity tipped them off."

I didn't like it. If I was in a relationship I didn't see why it would be anybody else's business. "Yeah, oh well." I replied.

My family had to leave a week after Freddy came to England because I was going back to New York to record in the studio for a week. Although they were missing home, my mom promised she would come up to see me more often.

I went into the recording studios not quite knowing what was going to come out of it. "We have a number of great producers who have material already partially written for you." Tig told me. "Go in there, see if you like anything, and have fun with it. We won't be here for long so you probably won't finish much, but we will keep coming back." He explained.

In New York I was able to work with a lot of popular pop producers including Max Martin (who produced …Baby One More Time) and Rodney "Darkchild" Jerkins. Even Shania Twain came to the studio asking if she could help write on one of my songs, as she was friends with the producer. We came up with something called "Don't Let Me Be the Last to Know". The songs presented to me were even more pop than what I had recorded earlier. They had more funk and dance beat then the songs off "Genie in a Bottle" and "Crazy EP". In the studio, writing lyrics into the songs came as easily as filling in the blanks. They weren't personal, but they were catchy.

"I want to go back and record songs that I've written on my own." I told Tig once the week was over.

"What have you written? Like what style and concept?" he asked me.

I didn't know how to reply. My songs were kind of boring. They were about love and break-ups and … what else? "I'll show it to you later." I said. Note to self: write new songs.

When I came back to England Freddy was still there doing a promotional tour around the country with 'N Sync. Trina had even made an effort to fly over and hang out with me in her break. "I need you to help me." I told her. "I need to write a song but everything I write is no good."

"That's not true" she replied. "You wrote that song Obvious for your demo and it was good enough to even put on your EP! You have the skill; you just need to learn to use it."

"Fine, but how do I do that?" I asked her.

"What do you want to write about?" she asked me.

I sighed. "I don't know Treen, Freddy I guess? I mean how can I write something personal and put it on a record and still have a personal life?"

"It's easy. Be general, but still be honest. No one has to know who the song is for." She told me as she hopped on the piano that was in my hotel room. She made up a melody that was simple and beautiful.

I smiled, okay now add lyrics, I thought. "Dear diary, today I saw a boy and I wondered if he noticed me. He took my breath away… it scares me because I've never felt this way. Should I tell him how I feel? Or would that scare him away? Diary, tell me what to do… please tell me what to say." I sang. It was a little bit childish, I knew. But that's how I felt: like a little girl with a crush.

"See that wasn't so hard." Trina said. "Keep going." she advised. And I did until I finished the song.

"So what is this place supposed to be?" Freddy asked me as he looked around the set of my new video. Come On Over (All I Want Is You) was my fourth and final single to be released from the Crazy EP.

"This is the module room." I told him while looking into the mirror. Adding to my blonde hair and blue streaks, I had put in long blonde extensions with red streaks as well. I was wearing a white halter top with sequins and skin tight white pants to match. My bared stomach was covered in rhinestones similar to those worn my Arabian dancers- I was a "genie in a bottle" after all.

"The what?" he asked.

"This video is pretty much going to be a mini-musical. It will start off in my bedroom with my friends as we are hanging out and then my bedroom walls will open to the living room where I sing and do a dance sequence. Then I will be in the yellow room wearing a plastic yellow jumpsuit and when I unzip the outfit it will cut to the green room where we do another dance sequence. Then the module room where the dancers and I all dance in our modules and then the finale is in the staircase room, where I do a rap breakdown and dance the last chorus with confetti!" I explained to him while flipping through the sketches made by the director.

This video was actually not my idea, only the image was. There wasn't much of a concept to the video other than how visual it was. There was dancing all the way through and I kind of become a player because I have three love interests. It's almost kind of a cat and mouse, flirtatious song. The song concept is simple: Come on over here baby. You know you make me go crazy. Now baby don't be shy, you better cross the line. I'm gonna love you right, because all I want is you!" the chorus pretty much said it all. It's kind of a combination of my other singles with pieces of "Crazy" and "What a Girl Wants" intertwined into it. Plus, we were also filming the Spanish version of the song "Ven Conmigo (Solamente Tu)".

After the "Crazy 2k" tour ended, I worked on promoting the song "Come on Over (All I Want is You)" right away. Countless performances on TV shows, festivals, and even a short 10 ten city South American Tour were a part of my schedule. After hearing that I was nominated for 4 Latin Grammy awards, Tig thought it was good idea to start showcasing my Spanish songs in Hispanic areas. On top of all this, my Christmas album was released in early October to give fans a chance to enjoy the holiday season for a longer period of time. The album was called "My Kind of Christmas".

"Guess who called me today?" Tig said to me in the car on the way to a concert in Brazil.

"I don't know… your ex-wife?" I guessed.

He looked at me like I was crazy. "Thank god no." he sighed. "The manager of the band Limp Bizkit called to ask if you would do a duet with Fred Durst at the MTV Video Music Awards next month."

I laughed. "For real, why would he ask that?"

"Apparently it was Fred's idea. He said he wanted to work with you." Tig responded.

Steve chimed into the conversation. "It could be controversial if you did it…" he warned.

"Well what should I do?" I asked.

"I honestly don't see any harm in it either way. If you do it I'm sure you'll get a lot of publicity, but I don't think that's particularly a bad thing. It's your call."

I smiled. Fred Durst seemed pretty cool when I met him, and Limp Bizkit was one of my favorite rock bands. "Why not take the risky way out?" I said. "Tell them I'll do it." That'll show Eminem, I thought.

I was at the Congo Room in Los Angeles getting ready to perform at the Latin Grammy Awards. I was extremely nervous, but this time around for a different reason then when I was at the American Grammy's last year.

"You've performed these songs a bunch of times already," said Rudy Perez, the writer on my Spanish Album. "You will do fine."

"Yes, but that was different. This is the Grammy's! If I mispronounce the lyrics I will be a disgrace to Latin Music." I dwelled.

"Imagine, if you win tonight you will be the first American artist to win a Latin Grammy!" said Andre, one of my back-up dancers.

I had been nominated for four Latin Grammy awards including: Best Female Vocal Performance for the song Genio Atrapado, Record of the Year for the song Pero Me Acuerdo de Ti, Best Latin Pop Album for the album Mi Reflejo, and Best Female Pop Album for the album Mi Reflejo.

I took a deep breath. "I can do this." I told myself. I had spent all day pronouncing-but not singing- the lyrics to the songs I was going to perform (as singing it would give me a sore throat before the performance).

I was singing a ballad called Contigo en la Distancia, and Genio Atrapado which was Genie in a Bottle in Spanish. I had my pink and blue streaked hair curled in perfect ringlets and clipped back with a rose. I was wearing a long sleeved midriff-bearing red blouse with a long Latin styled red skirt with ruffles to match. For some reason, I was chosen as the opening act for the show.

For a later performance, I would perform another ballad called Pero Me Acuerdo de Ti while being lifted on top of a half crescent half circle shape sun that was the logo for my first album while wearing a fluffy white robe. Then when I am brought down on top of a staircase I remove the robe to reveal a beautiful, short, white dress with strings coming off then ends as I perform Falsas Esperanzas, an up-beat pop song with extreme dance moves.

At the end of the night, I went home (to Trina's house, actually) with a Grammy for Best Female Pop Album for Mi Reflejo and the knowledge of the fact that I had become the first American to ever be awarded such a thing. I was much honored to be accepted by the Latin community especially because when I first put out the album some critics called me a fraud, claiming I just did it to earn money that is coming in with many popular Hispanic artists today such as Ricky Martin and Enrique Iglesias. Even Jorge called to say congratulations.

Dear Wonder,

Are you ready to rock out at the VMA's with me? I always knew you were hardcore. We should meet up some time for lunch or whatever. We'll talk about how we are going to tear shit up! Call me whenever…

-THE MAN (Fred Durst)

I laughed as I read Fred's e-mail. For being such a famous rock star, it was surprisingly easy to get in touch with him. He answered after the first ring when I called, and we planned to meet up at a restaurant on Melrose Avenue.

"What up, pop star?" he smiled when I got to the grill he had chosen. "Congrats on winning your Latin Grammy."

I smiled. "Thanks. Congratulations to you for winning Best International Video at the MuchMusic Awards." I said as I sat down.

"Hey, the band won, not me." He laughed. "It's all Limp Bizkit."

"Where did you get that name?" I wondered aloud.

"Well… I wanted a name that makes the people listening to the music want to turn away. You know, I want to repulse people." He explained. I didn't understand his logic, so I just smiled and nodded. "Where do you get a name like Wonder?"

"Long story short: my parents never thought they could have kids, and then they did. I guess they thought "Miracle" would be too cheesy."

"I like Wonder," he said. "So at the VMA's I already kind of have an idea. But what were you thinking?" he asked me.

"Well, as far as the duet I have no clue… but I was just going to perform my new single Come on Over before your manager called." I said. Come on Over (All I Want is You) had gone on to become my fourth number one single in less than two years. Tig said that in the business world, that would be a good song to perform at an award show considering it was doing well, but I didn't mind if Fred had other ideas.

He pulled at his backwards cap. "Okay look, Eminem is supposed to be performing The Real Slim Shady before us, so what I say we do is this: you go on stage and do your song and whatever and then I come out and we sort of… I don't know, pretend to fight. Like I will just come out of the crowd when you finish performing and I will try and show you up. Do you know the song Livin' it Up?" he asked me.

"I told you I have your album. Of course I know it." I responded. Livin' it Up was one of his band's hit singles.

"Okay so I'll come out of nowhere and just start singing that, and you'll be like 'what the fuck' and kind of come at me with my own lyrics and then we will kind of push and shove and it'll be great. What do you think?" he asked with a gleam in his eye.

"I think that's actually a really good idea." I told him. "Since your rock and I'm pop people will kind of be like 'whoa' and it will be… like a rivalry." I said.

"Exactly! You've got it." Fred snapped his fingers.

"Okay, so I'll see you then, I guess." I told him.

"Wait." He said before I could leave. "If you're ever looking to fuck shit up, just give me a call." He winked.

What? "Um, I have a boyfriend…" I said.

"Oh, who?" he asked.

"Freddy Porter, but it's kind of on the down low…" I didn't want him to accidentally spill the beans.

"The pop prince and princess together alas!" he joked. "Alright, I can respect that. But if you ever get tired of pop, you know where to find me." He told me as I walked away. Well… that wasn't awkward at all.

When most people are with their families celebrating by the open fire, I was at Madison Square Garden's Auditorium in New York City on Christmas Eve performing songs from my Christmas album for a Christmas special airing live on ABC to an audience of about 10.5 million viewers. Guest stars include: Lil' Bow Wow, Dr. John, and Brian McKnight.

"I like your hair lil' lady," said Lil' Bow Wow, a mainstream rapper who was only 14 years old but literally looked about 10. "I gotta get me some pink streaks like that weaved into my locks!"

"You are so cute!" I said for the twentieth time.

"Wonder, come here for a moment." Felicia said. I followed her back into my dressing room.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Tig told me to inform you that the label has chosen your first single for the new record." She said. Tig had taken off the week of Christmas to go see his mother in Florida.

"What new album?" I asked her.

"The one you've been working on in New York City." She said in a confused tone. I had gone back to finish and record the songs I had started in New York City including the finished version of Dear Diary. Although, we had about fifteen songs recorded I still wanted to have a few months off to write more.

"I'm not ready for that yet… what song did they choose?" I asked.

"Oops! … I Did It Again" she replied. I was relieved, that was the song I had been hoping for. Oops! …I Did It Again was a song I had written with Max Martin. It was about a girl who has so many guys falling in love with her that she feels bad when she doesn't feel the same way back. It was incredibly corny, and to make that clear we even added a reference to the movie Titanic in the song.

"I need to talk to Tig about this when he gets back." I said. "I don't have a problem with the song… I just don't want to start promoting any album yet."

"I understand where you are coming from." Felicia agreed. "You need at least a month or two to catch up on all the sleep you've been missing. Forget releasing an album!"

I was sitting in Freddy's tour bus on the way from his show with 'N Sync to a press conference they were dropping me off at in Los Angeles. Sitting next to me, Kayla was changing the station on Freddy's satellite TV. "Look what's on!" she said turning to a recap of the VMA's which took place only two weeks earlier. It showed a clip of me in a red halter top and skin-tight pants that matched the streaks in my hair perfectly and rhinestones covering my stomach.

"I'm not just talking about your sexuality, and I can't help myself when you put your hands on me. Its paradise when you and I get close, get tight. One on one, I wanna go on all night. I wanna play that game with you baby. All I want is you!" I sang on stage hitting the notes and my dance moves perfectly.

Then they showed Fred Durst walking onto the stage from the crowd. "The world is like a cage, and I don't think it's fair. And I don't even think that anybody cares." He rapped into the microphone. "Oh?" I said to him, looking pissed off. He continued, "We gotta get out!"

I yelled, "Get it out."

He continued "Get it out, with this mother fucking microphone. Plugging in my soul. I'm a renegade riot getting out of control!" and it went back and forth like that as we "competed" for the audience's attention. At one point I even got right up in his face (well about a foot below it as he's like six feet tall) and we pushed each other. "If you feel Mothafucka then you'll say …"

"Hell yeah!" I responded.

"Hell yeah I'm living life in the fast lane!" he yelled. Then we both bowed and walked off stage.

"Intense performance you did there," Kayla told me as she turned up the volume.

Back on the screen the lead singer from another popular rock band called The Filter was shown. "Fred Durst is a pop-lovin' frozen piece of dog shit." Richard Patrick said. "Fred getting on stage with Wonder Blake embarrassed us all. I speak on the behalf of all rockers when I say this."

Then the TV switched to a clip of Fred Durst at a party in The Playboy Mansion. "I already told you guys before, I did it all for the nookie. That's why I did that with Wonder." He said referencing his song called Nookie. "I want that girl and that's it. What do you want?" he asked. "I don't want to make music like her. I can't stand that type of music. People are like, 'why'd you do that for?' Like, what do you think I did that for? It's obvious isn't it? You know what I mean? So that's the deal. Everyone who was saying that wishes they were doing that too." He said completely straight-faced.

"What the fuck?" I said backstage at the press conference. "That's not true!"

"I thought Fred Durst was supposed to be your friend?" Kayla asked me as I walked towards the table. As soon as sat down I had a million people bombarding me with questions.

"Have you heard what Fred Durst has said about you? 'He did it all for the nookie'. How do you respond?"

I sighed. "He got no nookie! That did not happen okay?" I laughed. "I just wanna clear the table right there and the thing with J too. The whole Eminem song did not happen, okay?" I laughed even harder. "It just didn't, but it's some really crazy stuff that people want to insinuate and people wanna say, and it's hurtful."

"Are you angry with Fred Durst?" another man asked writing notes.

"Fred is crazy. Fred, man, how dumb are you if you're trying to get with somebody and then you and appear in a video that flat-out disses her. You know what I mean?" I told them. "I understand he and Eminem are good friends and they are touring together or whatever. But if he really told Eminem that, none of it is true. Seriously, I haven't spent 'quality time' with either of those two guys."

"What about your eating disorder?" the same man said. "Would you like to speak up about that?"

I made my fakest smile. "I actually don't have one. Maybe you have the wrong person." I said as kindly as I could.

"Wonder, I know how you feel right now" Tig said backstage. "But you really need to put some thought into the way you answer these questions."

"You can't be so mean!" Steve flipped out. "Little kids look up to you! Their parents aren't going to buy your album when you behave like that!"

"You are always telling me what to say and how to say it. I don't think I was being too harsh." I stated.

Freddy came to my defense, "Look, I've heard the song and out of all of us I think he hit Wonder the worst."

"Agreed." Kayla chimed in.

"I don't even get it. Why does everybody gotta be lying…" I complained. "None of that shit was true at all."

"I repeat, didn't you say that Fred Durst was your friend?" Kayla asked.

"Apparently all he wanted was "nookie". He was never really my friend and he obviously made it pretty clear that he doesn't like my music." I responded.

Felicia looked at me sympathetically. "He shouldn't have bashed your career like that," she said. "what does 'nookie' even mean?"

"Sexual intercourse." Steve answered.

Freddy looked pissed off. "Jesus Christ, how old is Durst anyways?" he asked. "Like twenty-five? Wonder was only seventeen up until 3 weeks ago! He's practically accusing himself of rape."

"Eminem said that he wanted to get with Wonder before she turned eighteen. Too late!" Kayla giggled.

Tig's head snapped towards her. "Kayla, this isn't a laughing matter. Get your attitude together."

"Um, how about you? You know I don't think it's very appropriate for Wonder to have rumors about her sucking dick's, giving venereal diseases to famous rappers, and giving nookie to rock stars. Especially at this age she's at. I mean look at all the kids listening to her. Maybe you should do something, Tig!" Kayla went off.

"Seriously though," Steve said. "You are really going against the image the label wants for you."

I laughed ironically. "Why do I need an image? I'm a person!"

"No you're not. You are a package, a product. People want to get what they paid for." Steve continued. "All of this. The pink and blue hair and sexual references in that new single of yours… I really think we need to reconsider for the next album. You are a young girl with a young audience. The new songs will be just as squeaky clean as the first album. Radio Disney already banned Come on Over from the air."

It was true, but I couldn't believe it. I was not nearly as sexed out as Kayla was in her videos. I was never out right sexy and the most sexual lyric I've ever had just came out in my new song, "I'm not just talking about your sexuality, but I can't help myself when you put your hands on me." And that was it. I acted as virginal as I possibly could. For Pete's sake I had been dating Freddy for 9 months and we hadn't even done it yet!

"Fine, I'll take the colors out of my hair if that will make you feel better! But, seriously, it's not my fault that some rapper is spreading sexual rumors about me. I didn't mean for that to happen!" I said on the brink of tears. At first, I didn't really mind when I heard the song. But now Steve has got me thinking that I've disappointed my fans, and on top of that Fred Durst embarrassed me in front of the whole world. Everyone knew I had a crush on him before I was dating Freddy, and now he's just making me look like a slut. Plus, he dissed my music.

Steve's face held a look of sympathy, "He isn't going to get away with that." He told me.

"What are we going to do, sue him?" I said, thinking it wasn't actually that bad of an idea.

"You know what he did is illegal." Tig said. "That's called 'libeling'. Saying things publicly that aren't true, not to mention he got money off of it."

Steve agreed. "Half of what he sold of that single was probably just the curiosity of your fans." He guessed. "This isn't just about him shit-talking, which obviously he is infamous for. This is about your pride Wonder, and you aren't going to let him stomp all over you like that."

It felt like high school. It felt as bad as when Jen Burke told everyone at school not to talk to me because I was a stuck-up B-Kid. Or like the time everyone moved off the dance floor because my song had come on at the prom. Only this was way worse, because of course, not only would Jen Burke hear Eminem's song, but so would the rest of the world. It was hard to grasp my head around it, and I wasn't sure I was prepared to deal with this level of fame.

"I didn't mean for him to do this!" I said letting my tears flow. "I wasn't even thinking when I said those things on my 'What a Girl Wants' TV special." Half of me wanted to apologize to Eminem and beg him to take it back, and the other half just wanted him to suffer. "It didn't even have anything to do with him! What do you expect me to say? Somebody should probably tell him that I was exposed to domestic violence as a child!" I blurted out. The whole room was silent. "I should go…" I said as I walked to my dressing room.

Behind me I heard Kayla telling Freddy that she would talk to me. "Hey," she said as she came in. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." I said. It was only half true.

"Look, I get how this stuff is. It's not an easy thing when lies are told about you all around the world, but really, it gets better. I promise." She told me.

I sighed, "How? Do people just stop telling rumors eventually?" I asked doubtfully.

"Yeah, they stop telling rumors when they stop caring. But way too many people care about you, so I wouldn't count on that. It gets better because you get stronger. You have to keep your head held high no matter what, okay? Don't let anybody push you around."

"I know." I sniffled.

"And listen to me. Just because Tig or Steve says it, it doesn't mean its right. What you said out there at the press conference was not too harsh, and what you said on TV about domestic abuse right."

"Did you know?" I asked Kayla.

"Yeah Lucky told me about all of your family stuff." She said, "she told Freddy too…"

"Oh…" I said, "That's a good thing I guess," I felt like now would have been a good time to ask Kayla about the whole lesbian thing, but for some reason I just couldn't.