Dream of the Phoenix
Chapter 10: Shattered Remembrances
AN: I apologize for this having taken so long; there is no excuse for it. Before we get on to the story I would like to point something out to one of my reviewers. Dragonlord, all your points are very valid except for the fact that everything after the game ended is the world in which the story now takes place. So that being the case, I can have Neo-Midgar and AVALANCHE helping ShinRa, it's my world now (insert evil laugh here).
Ok, enough of that, on to the story.
Barrett sighed as he set the paperwork down on his desk. As Vice-President of Reconstruction he had a lot of forms to sign and fill-out. He almost wondered why he had said yes to Reeve when he offered the job.
Running his hand over his tired face he glanced to the pictures sitting on his desk. There, captured forever on film were the reasons he now sat where he did. In one photo was a smiling Marlene, holding his hand as they posed. In another frame there was a group shot of AVALANCHE before Jesse, Biggs, and Wedge were killed. In the last frame there was a couple staring out at him, insanely happy as they smiled for the camera.
Reaching over he picked up the last photo and pulled it to him. There before him was a group photo taken on the night Cloud and Aerith were married. Standing in the middle were the newlyweds, around them were their friends, all as happy as they could be for them, even Tifa.
Returning the image to where it rested on his desk he picked up his pen and returned to the forms awaiting him.
"Barrett?" a feminine voice called from behind him, accompanying the hand that rested on his shoulder.
"Tifa," he replied as he leaned back in his chair.
"It's almost time to go, Cid will be here soon."
"I know, I know. I was just trying to finish some paperwork," he replied as best he could, still unused to the more proper ways of speaking that Reeve had forced him to learn.
"You and I both know that's not why you're up here," she replied as she took the pen from his hand and dropped it to the desk, replacing it with her own hand.
With a sigh he answered her, forming his thoughts as carefully as he could.
"I know, but you know that I really don't want to be there. There are too many memories for me."
"There are memories for us all, but we have to face them sooner or later."
"I know, but I can't help but feel responsible," he said as he pushed away from the desk and walked to his window.
"It's not your fault, there wasn't anything any of us could do, what's happened has happened. We must move on with our lives."
Barrett was silent as he stared out onto the thriving Neo-Midgar, rising like a Phoenix from the ashes of its predecessor.
"I feel as though I should have done something, anything. Then maybe … maybe he'd still be here."
"Barrett, what happened to Cloud was by his own choice. There was nothing you or I could have done to change his mind. It was his decision to leave, we had no right to try and stop him."
With a final sigh of resignation he turned to look at her.
"I still feel I could have tried harder."
Tifa approached her friend and pulled him into a hug that they both badly needed.
"You did all you could do for him," she whispered.
The clearing of a throat behind them broke them apart.
"Sir, ma'am, Captain Cid is here for you," the young man said as he stood before them.
"Thank you Jeremy," Tifa said as she approached him. Jeremy was young, about 21. He stood a good five foot seven and had close cut black hair and blue eyes. His face always had the hint of a smile. He was currently employed as Barrett's personal assistant. "Take the rest of the day off."
"Thank you ma'am," Jeremy replied as he turned and left, closing the door behind him.
"We'd better go," she said as she turned to Barrett, a small smile on her face, "you know how Cid is."
With a grunt Barrett grabbed his jacket from the coat rack and left the office with Tifa.
"Get your &$ butts on board, we're leaving," Cid yelled before Barrett or Tifa had a chance to take a single step onto the helipad.
Snapping a mock salute, Tifa pulled Barrett up the ramp to the Highwind.
"Let's go," Cid said once the ramp had been withdrawn.
Almost instantly the airship lifted from the new ShinRa tower, quickly leaving Neo-Midgar behind.
As she flew, the pilot kept to a course that would take them straight to their destination, The City of the Ancients. All aboard knew that this wasn't a sight seeing trip.
Tifa, Barrett, and Cid held no hope of Cloud showing up; he always waited until he knew they had left before visiting.
As the snowy Northern Wastes approached the air aboard the Highwind became more somber. Soon the airship was touching down outside of the City; the ramp throwing up a small could of white as it sank into the snow.
"Well, let's go," Tifa said as she led the small group from the ship.
Inside, the city hadn't changed much since they were here last year. Still the somber air that had pervaded the city since Aerith's death lingered, still the birds sang a mournful song. The only difference now was that there were more flowers, the same flowers that Aerith had grown in her Church garden in Midgar. No one is sure how they came to be planted here, for they were native only to the Midgar plains, but no one was complaining.
As they traveled down into the depths of the city, an almost silent music filled the air, an eternal requiem in honor of Aerith.
The group was silent as they approached the altar where she had died and the serene lake where Cloud had laid her to rest. Looking about them they were startled to see that the flowers were blooming all along the banks of the lake.
"She always loved these flowers," a voice broke through their reverie, shaking them as they believed they were alone.
"She once told me that thee would only grow for her, it seems as though that is still true."
They turned to the sound of the voice, only to find nothing but a thicket of trees. Slowly a figure emerged from the thicket. All eyes widened as a hardened warrior approached them holding a bouquet of the very same flowers he had been speaking of.
"Cloud," Tifa whispered reverently as the normally silent man walked towards them.
"Tifa, Barret, Cid," he said as he passed by them, his obvious destination the lakeshore where he stood five years before as he let his wife slip into the dark depths of the lake.
The others were silent as they watched him Wade into the water and stand in the very spot he stood all those years ago. Gently, as though he were placing her into the water again, he placed the flowers on the surface and watched as they slowly sank.
When he returned from the water, Tifa approached him, gathering him into a hug when she was close enough. He silently returned it, letting his childhood friend cry the tears she had been holding since he disappeared.
"Cloud," she whispered again.
"Tifa, it is ok, cry if you must, I understand your pain."
She did just that, she released the dam holding back here tears, letting the torrent join the few that were able to escape earlier.
After standing there for several minutes she broke the hug and stepped away, taking a moment to see how he had changed.
His hair was much longer, his skin was more pale yet it still appeared to have a small tan. He had gained more bulk, he was much stronger than before. But the thing that caught her attention the most was his eyes, they were almost vacant, the Mako fire that one burned in them was all but extinct, only a small flicker of the passion he once had still burned.
"Cloud," she began as he began to return to the trees from whence he had come from. "What happened to you?"
"I found out that it was more difficult to find my light than I had anticipated. I realized that I had to change in order to find her."
He was silent as he began to walk, pausing only to speak one last thing over his shoulder before disappearing into the trees.
"I'm still searching."
With that he was gone just as suddenly as he had appeared, once again leaving the trio to the holiness of the lake.
"That was interesting," Cid said as he pulled a cigarette from the pack and put it between his lips. Just as he went to light it, he remembered where he was and instead placed the stick of tobacco behind his ear.
"It's time to go," Barrett said softly as he began walking back toward the steps they had come from moments before, Cid following a few steps behind. Tifa continued to stare at where Cloud had vanished.
Cloud, she prayed, please don't shut us out, let us help you.
"TIFA!" Cid's yell broke her from her thoughts.
"Coming," she replied back as she slowly followed Cid and Barrett.
The entire time they were leaving, Cloud watched them from his hidden position amongst the trees. He knew they were here to pay their respects to his Aerith, but he also knew that they could not help him on travels. He had to find a way to bring her back on his own, it was a part of the vows he had taken. Till death do us both part, she may be dead, but he wasn't, at least not physically. He would continue to search for a way to bring her back, even if it killed him.
TBC … Chapter 11: A Dream Your Heart Makes