The present day
Carl and Tamia were quiet on the way back home to the Kingdom, the only sound was the horse's hooves clicking on the pavement. His mind was racing. He knew for sure that Glenn, Maggie, their baby, Michonne, and Judy were still alive. Negan had taken over Alexandria and made his family slaves. Glenn had joined the Saviors, but he was on the Kingdom's side. Carl felt as though the past that he had worked so hard to hide and forget was finally catching up with him.
Tamia watched Carl out of the corner of her eye as he stared ahead. She could tell he was deep in thought. She didn't want to interrupt him, but she was dying to know what was going on, and who that man was who knew him.
"Carl" she called, but he didn't seem to hear her. "Carl!" she said a little more loudly.
He jumped a little at her voice and turned towards her. "Carl, what is going on?" she whispered to him so that the knights behind them couldn't hear.
He sighed. He didn't want to tell her right now, right here, but she deserved to know. She had stood with him for a long time, and if he told anyone he'd tell her first.
"I know... knew... that man. He was part of the group I was with before I came to the Kingdom. I traveled with him for years. He was family." Carl paused and Tamia patiently waited for him to continue. "He told me that people I thought were dead are still alive. He told me where the town is, that Negan is living in. It's a town that I used to live in." He stopped, thinking that Tamia might say something, but she just looked at him until he continued.
"My family, I thought they were dead, I hoped they weren't, but now I know they're not. But Negan is keeping them as slaves. That man told me he would send someone to the kingdom so we could make a plan to help them overthrow Negan. With the town and the Kingdom working together, we can do it."
Tamia just nodded. "So you have a family now" she said. Carl didn't know how to interpret her words. He couldn't tell if she was accusing him, being genuine, or pitying him.
"I... I know I told you they were dead. I wasn't honest with you. I have a little sister who's alive, and... my mom. Well... she's not my mom, but she is. And I think... the man, Glenn... he said she was doing what she had to do to stay alive, and I'm afraid of what that could be. I'm afraid for her and my sister."
Carl sighed, slightly relieved to be getting everything off his chest.
"There's more. I didn't lose my eye the way I told you. A boy shot me, he was mad that my dad killed his dad, and he shot me. And I was only in the woods for a day or two before the kingdom guards found me, not months like I said"
"Why did you leave your people?" Tamia asked. "You said you lived in a town, and it has walls. Why did you leave?"
Carl looked away, anywhere but at Tamia. He didn't want to face her when he spoke. "I'm the reason my dad died."
She looked shocked. "What do you mean?" She asked.
"We were out on a run. He told me not to use my gun, not to attract attention, but a walker surprised me and I shot it without thinking. When my dad and I were leaving, these men pulled up, they must've heard the shot. My dad pushed me behind some bushes and they didn't see me, but they saw him. He was talking to them and the whole time I had my gun up, pointed at the man he was talking to. I could've ended it right there. I could've saved him, but I waited, and they shot him right in front of me. They dragged him off and dumped him in a van. It was all because of me. I couldn't move because..." tears started rolling down Carl's face but he didn't wipe them away.
"Because I was scared. I was a coward. And I couldn't go back to my family after that. I was too ashamed."
Tamia just listened with her mouth hanging slightly open.
"Everyone here thinks I'm so brave, so smart, but they don't know who I really am" Carl said, finally wiping his tears.
"Yes they do Carl. We think you're brave and smart because you are. You just proved it not 30 minutes ago. It doesn't matter what happened in your past because you're different now anyway. You feed and protect this community, that's why everyone respects you". Tamia pulled her horse, Ghost, closer to Carl and she reached across and grabbed his hand.
"I don't know who you were before, but I've known you for a year now and I know for a fact you're not a coward. So please, don't call yourself that around me. And I'm sure when we get back to your town your family will be so happy to see you." Tamia paused for a moment and stared ahead, suddenly lost in thought.
"I never told you what happened to me, before I got here. I was at a camp with my mom and my three sisters. I was the oldest, so my mom made me watch them a lot while she worked. She was one of the cooks in the camp. One day I was in the tent, doing... something... I don't even remember now. The tent flap was open and my little sisters were playing outside. I heard screams, but I thought it was them fooling around. I ignored them. They kept screaming and I realized these weren't normal screams. I jumped up and looked out the tent and..."
Tamia's eyes opened wide as if she were actually reliving what she'd seen. Carl reached across the horses, rubbing her thigh. The touch seemed to snap her out of her flashback.
"I saw a walker on top of my youngest sister, Tanya, eating her throat out. And I froze too. She was still alive. She was looking at me. She... She was reaching for me. I know if she could've talked, she would've called for me, she would've said to save her."
"What did you do?" Carl asked quietly.
"I grabbed my other sisters and I ran. I left her. I know she saw me. That was the last thing she ever saw. We ran to find my mom. Somehow the gates got taken down. The walkers were everywhere. We got to the kitchen but we couldn't find my mom. I didn't know what to do. People were trampling each other to get away so I just dragged my sisters in the direction everyone else was going. My sister, Tamra, tripped and she got trampled by the people behind us. I couldn't stop to help her or I'd get trampled too. So I just had one sister left. I dragged her as far as I could. We got out the camp somehow, with a group of 5 other people. That night, my sister, Tia, got up to use the bathroom, and one of the other people on watch shot her on her way back."
Carl couldn't hide his horrified gasp.
"It didn't kill her right away, she got shot in the shoulder, but we couldn't do anything for her. It took her two days to die. It was the worse out of all the deaths. The people we were with wanted to move on, they didn't want to stay so close to the herd and the camp we came from, but we couldn't move her. So they mumbled and grumbled about her dying too slowly."
Tamia cried hysterically, remembering her traumatic experience. "She was barely conscious and I... I knew it was time for her to go. I had seen other people who died and came back, and I knew she would too. I asked if someone would kill her so she wouldn't come back, but no one wanted to. I was the only kid, and they were adults and... and they made me do it. I had to..."
Carl stopped his horse and grabbed Tamia's horse's reigns to stop it as well. He hopped off of Judy's back and walked around to Tamia, gently pulling her off her horse. He then wrapped his arms around her and held her. The other knights were staring at them. They hadn't heard the conversation between them, but they knew something big had happened.
"Tamia I'm so so sorry" Carl whispered "I'm so sorry". Tamia just sobbed, burying her head into Carl's shoulder as he rubbed her back. "You don't have to talk about it anymore".
Tamia was quiet for a minute, still holding on to Carl. She then said "No. I want to. I haven't told anyone everything. Not even Ezekiel."
She took a deep breath.
"After I killed my sister, I took all my belongings which was a dirty blanket that I found, and left that group. I just picked a road and started walking. I had nothing left and I thought I'd die soon. I got to the highway and walked. I wasn't even looking at the signs. As I passed rest stops I would try to look for food but there wasn't much that wasn't picked over. I would sometimes find cars with walkers in them and I'd scavenge in there because I knew they probably hadn't been picked over yet. I did that for weeks. I couldn't believe I was still alive after one day, but I made it. I survived."
"I was wandering around, living day to day, minute to minute. Occasionally, I would come across people in small camps, but I would hide from them. There were things that I saw, people hurting other people... I didn't trust anyone... and then I just passed out one day. I remember just collapsing and I couldn't move anymore, and I thought 'This is it. Finally I can get out of here. It's over.' I just laid there. And then some knights found me and brought me here. When I found out I was in Washington I was shocked. I had no idea I'd walked that far. I started in Atlanta."
Carl just looked at her in wonder. He knew she was a badass but he had no idea she'd gone through so much, and walked so far by herself. He felt embarrassed to even compare his problems to hers.
Tamia seemed to read his mind. "We both have had horrible things happen to us, they're equally horrible. The point is that we've kept going. If I didn't, I never would've found you, and you never would've found me. Giving up doesn't help anyone. And just because we're weak sometimes, doesn't mean we're cowards. You and me, we're warriors."
Carl smiled and held Tamia tighter to his chest. He then leaned down and kissed her gently on the lips. "We're warriors" he repeated. He looked into Tamia's watery eyes and said "I love you so much". "I love you Carl" she repeated.
He led Tamia over to Ghost, and helped her back up on to her horse, even though he knew she'd been riding horses longer than he had. Carl then climbed on Judy's back, and they continued home.
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Ezekiel paced nervously across the school's stage. It was getting dark. He was waiting for the knights to return with news about whether or not the deal was successful and if Negan's men accepted the half a wagon of supplies in return for Sir Larry.
He also wanted to know the whereabouts of Carl and Princess Tamia. He knew that Tamia was perfectly capable of taking care of herself, she had walked from Atlanta to Washington DC by herself, with no supplies, during the apocalypse for heaven's sake. He also knew that Carl would give his life to protect Tamia, he was sure of it. But he still felt guilty for sending them on such a risky mission. And he knew that he wouldn't have been able to do it himself.
He decided to take a walk to the stables to calm his nerves. The horses always made him feel better. As he walked out of the school building he heard the guards signal someone's approach with a short blow from a bull horn. Ezekiel raced to the gates as they opened, revealing Carl and Tamia, with the knights, the wagon of supplies, and Sir Larry sitting in the back of the wagon.
Ezekiel's mouth opened in surprise, wondering how they managed to bring back Larry and the wagon. He was relieved that no one looked hurt.
"You're back!" Ezekiel exclaimed happily, lifting Tamia off of her horse and hugging her. "Are you ok?".
"Yes father" she replied.
Ezekiel nodded and then turned to Carl "what happened?". Carl gave a slight smirk. "We got Larry and the wagon, and now I know where Negan's headquarters are." Carl said smiling. "And... we have allies". Ezekiel gave Carl a big hug, patting him on the back. He grabbed Tamia's hand and put his hand on Carl's back.
"Come my boy, I see we have much to speak about"
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Carl was sitting in Tamia's room, checking out his missing eye in the mirror. The skin around the wound had long healed, creating a smooth area of skin where there should have been an eye. Dr. Denise had done an excellent job of pulling the skin over the empty socket so that his wound wouldn't be too horrifying. He had stopped wearing the bandage over his eye long ago, and he was comfortable leaving the wound the way it was. He had been self-conscious about it for a long time, especially when meeting new people, but Tamia hadn't cared about his external wounds.
As he checked out the wound his mind went to Michonne. He had to get back to Alexandria to help her. She was always the second in command in Alexandria, and with Rick dying she was the one in charge. She must've been the one Negan targeted with his brutality when he moved in, Glenn had alluded to that much. Carl knew she would protect Judy at all costs, and he knew that had to be what Negan was holding against her.
Lost in his thoughts, Carl didn't notice Tamia re-enter her room. She moved up behind him, startling him. "Sorry" she said when he jumped. "What are you doing?" she asked, resting her hands on his shoulders.
"I was just thinking" he replied, "about my family, and how to help them". Tamia rubbed Carl's shoulders. "We will" she said. They stayed in a comfortable silence for a while and then she slowly moved her hands from Carl's shoulders to his hair.
"Carl? Is there a reason why you never cut your hair?"
Carl smiled. "You sound like Mich... my mom, she used to ask me that all the time. I like it long like this". He moved his eye up to meet hers in the mirror. "Why?... You don't like it like this?" he asked.
"Well, you haven't cut it in at least a year, and at this point it's longer than mine... so no. Sorry." she said, smiling as she ran her fingers through it. "But I have a solution if you don't want to cut it. I'll corn row it for you. Like mine."
Carl laughed. "So I look like a girl?"
"Well you kinda look like a girl now, so I think this will be an upgrade" Tamia joked. Both of them laughed.
"Can you do that with my kind of hair? You know, I'm not black."
Tamia snatched her hands away from Carl so fast it startled him. "What? You lied to me all this time!?" Tamia asked, and it took Carl a few moments to realize she was joking.
"Duh dummy" she said giving him a hug. "It'll make you look more badass than you already do. It'll make you look like Snoop Dogg."
Both of them laughed until their sides hurt. "Okay" he said "only 'cuz you like it".
Carl sat for 30 minutes as Tamia cornrowed his hair. He had to admit it felt great when her fingers were in his hair. When she was done he was actually impressed. "You were right" he said, checking himself out in the mirror.
"I always am, get used to it" she said, kissing him on the cheek. As she went to move away, Carl held her shoulders and pulled her face to his, kissing her gently on the lips. She didn't move to break the kiss, so Carl slowly opened his mouth, and she did the same, allowing their tongues to swirl around each other as they kissed. Carl's hand gently snaked around Tamia's waist, pushing her closer.
Suddenly a knock on the door startled both of them. "What is it?" Tamia asked, annoyed. "Princess Tamia, there is a visitor from Alexandria asking to speak with Carl."
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Michonne heard a loud crack as Negan burst through her locked door. The middle of the door splintered on contact, cutting up Negan's arm, but in his drunk stupor he didn't seem to notice.
Michonne dove in front of the closet door where Judith was, holding her knife at the ready. She could hear Judith crying on the inside.
"I told you to open the door" Negan said, advancing on her. Michonne swiped at him with the knife as a warning. "Get out of my room and sleep it off before you do something you regret" she warned.
Negan's "date" then placed herself in the doorway of the small room. "Get her Negan" she called "You should iron her ass after hitting you". Michonne stared at Negan, willing him not to come any closer. She would defend herself and she knew it wouldn't have a good ending for her or Judy. He moved forward to grab her arm and Michonne plunged her knife into his arm. He stumbled backwards, roaring in pain as the knife still stuck out. He fell on to the floor, moaning.
Suddenly the woman was running towards Michonne. Michonne quickly back handed her, knocking her into the wall. The woman turned and came at Michonne again, knocking her against the closet door. Michonne could hear Judith screaming "mommy" from the closet, and it made her fight that much harder. Michonne kicked the woman, sending her backwards, and Michonne then rammed her into the wall. Negan slowly was making his way to his feet, and Michonne realized she was outnumbered. She punched the woman, hoping to knock her out, but she just fell to the floor clutching her face.
Michonne quickly slid the closet door open, grabbing a hysterical Judith, and turned to run out the room, getting as far as the room door when Negan grabbed her. Michonne tried to twist out of his grip but he was too strong. Having no choice, Michonne dropped Judith who hit the floor with a plop. "Go to Aunt Carol!" Michonne yelled at her, as Negan pulled her back in the room.
Michonne could hear Judith scurry down the steps as fast as her two year old legs could take her, before she turned and punched Negan in the nose again. He roared in pain again and put her into an unbreakable bear hug, holding her arms down so she couldn't defend herself.
The woman then took the opportunity to punch Michonne in the face. "Who's the hoe now?" she screamed. "You still are" Michonne replied, kicking the woman with both legs, sending her flying across the room, and throwing an already unsteady Negan off balance and to the floor. She kicked Negan in the nose for a third time but he grabbed her foot, yanking her to the floor too. He quickly climbed on top of her, pinning her down on her stomach.
"You fucking broke my nose" he mumbled, his blood dripping on to the side of her face. She tried to wiggle out from under him, but he was too heavy. "You deserved it" she responded. He pushed down on her harder, making it more difficult to breathe. "Get...off...me..." she gasped. "Why won't you ever be fucking nice to me?" he slurred. "I'm nice to you. Gave you a fucking job. Took you and your baby in."
Michonne turned her head slightly and saw the woman starting to stand from where she landed across the room. She was scowling.
"Let me... go" Michonne managed to get out. "I can be a good man" Negan mumbled, pressing himself into her back. "I can take care of you and your baby. If you just let me."
Michonne tried to move but she was stuck to the floor under his weight. The woman began walking towards them. "Negan, are you gonna give her the iron? I can go ask them to warm it up."
Negan ignored her. "Just stay with me for one night. Just one, if you don't like me I won't ask you again. I know you haven't had a man since yours died. I know you have to be lonely..."
Michonne tensed up as she felt him harden on top of her.
"Get the fuck off of me" she gasped, bucking underneath him. Her words angered him and he grabbed both of her wrists. "Fine!" he yelled "Here's your choice, you can fuck me or you can fucking die!"
Before Michonne could fully think about what she was saying she screamed "I'd rather die!"
All three people in the room got quiet. Negan seemed a little shocked and slightly more sober suddenly. Although Michonne meant what she said, in that split second she wasn't thinking about Judy and the impact it would have on her. But it was too late to take it back now.
Negan suddenly moved to stand up, yanking Michonne up with him and pinning her arms behind her back. He leaned over to whisper in her ear "then you'll fucking die".
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Carol was getting ready to go to sleep. Daryl had just lit the fire that would be keeping the two of them warm for the night. They both got into the sleeping bag that they shared, and Carol had just rested her head on Daryl's chest when she heard a tiny voice say "Aunt Carol!".
Carol sat up startled and was confused to see Judith running towards her. Daryl rolled out of the sleeping bag, looking around for Michonne. "Judith!" Carol said "What are you doing here? Where's your mommy?". Judith just pointed towards Negan's home.
Carol knew Michonne would never let Judith out of the house by herself unless something was horribly wrong. Carol and Daryl exchanged a look, Carol scooped Judith up quickly, and the two of them raced to the home.
As they got to the front porch Negan emerged, blood dripping from his nose and a knife still stuck in his arm, gripping Michonne by her arms. "What the fuck happened?" Daryl asked. Negan ignored them, marching Michonne somewhere. As Michonne spotted Carol, holding Judith, she yelled "please take care of her". Carol could tell Michonne had been in a fight, her cheek was swollen like she'd been hit. Daryl and Carol followed Negan and watched as he escorted Michonne to the town's jail.
"What is going on?" Carol asked Daryl. She looked down at Judy who was gripping her and shaking. The little girl still looked terrified. "Judy, what happened to mommy?" Carol asked.
"Negan is bad" she explained "Negan broke the door".
Carol looked at Daryl and then back to Judy. "What door honey?" she asked.
"The room. Mommy said go in the closet".
"Negan broke the door in your room?" Carol asked her. Judy nodded. "He's bad. He and the lady hurt mommy" she said, tears falling from her eyes.
"Shit" Daryl said, softly.
They stood in front of the jail unsure of what to do, but they knew Michonne was in big trouble. Based on the amount of blood coming from Negan, Michonne put up a hell of a fight, but who knows what he did to her. And there had to be some kind of punishment, seeing as though she fought back.
Their attention was drawn to the gates as they opened with an earsplitting screech, and a truck full of Saviors entered. The gates had long been replaced since the Saviors knocked them down with a school bus, but they were never the same again and they let out a loud high pitched sound whenever opened or closed.
Daryl and Carol watched as a few Saviors, including Glenn, hopped out the back of the truck. One of them yelled "Where's Negan?". One of the guards on duty pointed towards the jail and then man took off running towards the jail building. Carol glanced over at Glenn and for the first time in a long time he actually looked back at her like he was trying to get her attention.
She stared for a little bit, and he signaled with his eyes to a spot behind one of the houses. She hesitated, but Glenn had already started to walk towards the house. Carol nudged Daryl with her arm and he followed her behind the house.
Glenn was waiting for them, looking around nervously. Carol immediately noticed Glenn's eye was red and swollen looking like he'd just been punched. Carol and Daryl just waited for him to speak. "We got attacked" Glenn said, "by the Kingdom. We were holding one of their knights and they came to get him." A small smile spread across Glenn's face, "but Carl was leading the people from the Kingdom".
The two of them just stared at Glenn stupidly. "What?" Daryl asked.
"Carl! He's alive. He's living in the Kingdom. He lead the attack against us." Glenn said.
"Carl?" Carol said confused, and then a switch seemed to click in her mind. "Carl?" she said excitedly.
Judy who was still in Carol's arms, listened in with interest.
"He's been living there the whole time" Glenn said.
Daryl rubbed his face trying to process what Glenn was saying. "How?" Carol asked. "Why... why is he there?"
"I didn't get to talk to him long, but the Kingdom attacked us, that's what that guy is going to tell Negan. It's going to be a war. I told Carl that I'd send someone to go talk to King Ezekiel and see if we can make an alliance against Negan. So we can fight back."
"How? how are you going to send someone to Ezekiel? Especially if the Kingdom attacked us, no one is going to be allowed to go there." Daryl said.
"I have my ways" Glenn replied, winking. "Where's Michonne? I've got to tell her. She's gonna flip."
"Negan just locked her up in the jail" Daryl said "something happened".
"What?" Glenn asked, stunned.
"We don't know, but it don't look good. Negan was all bloody with a knife sticking out his arm. I'm guessing he messed with the wrong woman." Daryl replied.
Just then, Negan re-emerged from the jail with the man who ran in to tell him about the Kingdom's attack. He still was bleeding profusely and he looked extremely drunk. The other man was helping him towards the infirmary.
"I gotta go" Glenn said. "I'll try to find out what's happening with Michonne. I just need someone we can trust to go to the Kingdom and negotiate."
"I'm in" Daryl said, "I'm going".
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It was late, about midnight, when Glenn entered the house used as a jail. The guard there was playing solitaire using the light from a small lamp. "I'm your replacement" Glenn said confidently. The man just shrugged his shoulders, gathered up his cards, and walked out. Glenn quickly made his way down the steps leading to the cell. There were no lights down there, but Glenn could make out Michonne's still figure laying on the small cot in the moonlight let in by the one window.
Wondering if she was asleep, Glenn quietly called her.
She turned her head to face him, and he could now make out the whites of her eyes. She wasn't sleeping. He slowly walked up to the cell but she didn't move or answer.
"Are you ok?" he asked. From what he could see, which wasn't much, she didn't seem to be bleeding or have broken bones.
"No" she said quietly. "I haven't been for a long time."
Glenn was shocked by her response. He hadn't spoken to her in so long, and he realized he had no idea what she was going through, living in Negan's house with Judith. It must've been hell. Both of them had to sell their souls to survive.
"Can I ask what happened?" he said gently, knowing he had no right to ask.
"It doesn't matter" Michonne said, sounding defeated. "Nothing matters but Judy. I failed her..." Michonne's voice cracked with emotion. "And now I won't be there to protect her."
Glenn had no idea what she was talking about. "Of course you'll be there" he said.
"No. I won't." Michonne whispered. "Negan's gonna kill me tomorrow."