So, this is probably the fastest I will ever get a chapter for this story out. I'm uploading this earlier than I originally intended due to the fact that I'm not sure what I'm going to be doing on Christmas, and tomorrow I'm going to be hanging with my mother all day at her store, where there isn't internet that I can just hack into. (Not that I commonly hack into people's internet, mind you.)

Anyway, this actually got way too long. 4,525. That's the total word count, and I cut it off at the first moment I could without cutting off half the damn chapter.

Onward to reviews, which I feel I should publicly address!

OddShadow: Joke choices are funny, although A) they are jokes. B) I would no doubt butcher their personalities like there was no fucking tomorrow. And you see the issue with Itachi. I would love that, but Part 1 Sasuke would probably jump into the real world to murder me. And Yamato... I'll have him under consideration.

Phantom Pawprints: Seriously? I kind of meant that as a joke, but FUCK YEAH! Definitely on my list. Plus, having Naruto summon a fox god of some sort would just be awesome. (There is a fox god somewhere, right?)

Guest: Asuma's dealing with the remains of Team 10. Shikaku's on the list, but... he's a lazy ass, right? Just as much as Shikamaru, if I'm right. (Which I probably am not.)

Chapter 11

Naruto attempted a punch. The man stopped awkwardly retreating and defended with ease. Gaara's sand started to wrap around him, but he jumped away.

Ino rushed forward, acting as a distraction while Naruto tried to get a hit in from behind. The man caught on and got out of the way, unfortunately causing him to hit her. He growled angrily when he saw what he had done. "Dammit!" He yelled. He could already tell this guy was way past them in just about every field.

Naruto created 8 clones, the lowest number he could manage, and rushed forward, switching places with his clones randomly and quickly in a desperate attempt at confusion. It partially worked. The man seemed interested in his tactics and took a moment to study him. When he got close, though, the man yelled, "Not good enough!"

The man was on him, the real one, in an instant, kicking him in the jaw with his knee and sending him flying back.

Naruto hit the ground with a thud. He groaned unhappily, jumping up a second later, finding his teammates had jumped back into the fray. Ino attempted a kick, which was caught. She was then thrown into Gaara, who had been trying to crush the man with his sand. As a result, they were both knocked down.

'He's toying with us, isn't he?' Naruto thought grimly. 'He surely knows some Justu, but he hasn't even so much as taken out a kunai. How did I catch him so easily, then? Is he that bad at stealth?'

Shaking that off, he jumped back into battle, promptly getting his ass kicked again.

Off to the side, Jiraiya and the man from the Land of Books stared at them. "Shouldn't you help?" The man asked.

"Not unless they're going to die," Jiraiya answered.

"B-but why? That man is going to kill them!"

"I think they can take him down. They just need to warm up a little."

Naruto was knocked into a tree. "You're toying with us!" He yelled angrily. "Stop it!"

The man raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? OK then. Fire Style: Great Fireball Jutsu!"

"And I regret asking," Naruto said, staring blankly at the ball of fire that appeared from the man's mouth. He closed his eyes, fearing impact.

Before he could get hit, sand appeared before him, creating a shield. The heat was unbearable, but when the attack died down, Naruto was still alive. He slowly opened his eyes and looked over to Gaara, who smiled at him. Naruto smiled in return and gave him a thumbs-up, and rushed out from behind his cover, running quickly and burning the soles of his shoes slightly from the charred ground.

The man scowled, clearly annoyed from Naruto's inability to die. He made to punch the boy in the face, but the sand appeared in front of his fist and caught it, still searing hot and burning the man's flesh. The man reeled back, pained, and was punched in the stomach by Naruto. He stumbled back, and was then kicked to the ground by Ino.

"See?" Jiraiya asked the Land of Books resident. "They just had to warm up."

"Whoa," the man muttered.

"That'll happen when you send in only one guy that's probably only low-Chunin at best to take down a man guarded by a gaggle of Genin." Raising his voice, Jiraiya yelled, "Hey Naruto, sniff out the area for any more enemies!"

Naruto glanced at him and nodded, leaving his friends to restrain the grounded enemy.

Sniffing about, Naruto scowled. He changed back and yelled, "I smell burned flesh. That's it."

"Maybe you should widen your search."

Naruto nodded and returned to his sniffing, wandering into the trees. A moment passed, and he suddenly burst back into the clearing yelling to himself, "SHIT SHIT SHIT!"

A second later, three other ninja jumped out of the bushes.

Jiraiya frowned and engaged who was clearly the Jonin of the group in battle, leaving Team Animal to deal with the remaining two high-Genin/low-Chunin ninja.

"Oh, this is not going to end well, is it?" Naruto asked.

"Probably not," Ino replied.

"I'll take the left guy," Naruto said. "You two take the right!"

The two Genin nodded, and they all jumped into action.

Naruto tried to stare down his opponent. "Oh, taking me on, are you?" The enemy asked, smirking. "I'll have you know that I'm the strongest and smartest of my team! And you're clearly the dumbest, wearing orange like that, walking right up to us like that! You're a moron, aren't you?!"

Naruto growled angrily. He knew that the guy was just trying to rile him up, and it was working. He knew he wasn't bright, but it still stung.

Starting the fight, Naruto created 100 clones. While it didn't work with 8, he hoped that there would be too many for the man to be able to lock onto the real one in time, despite the large gap in chakra within the various entities.

Fortunately for him, it worked, and he managed to connect his fist into the man's jaw, throwing him upward a meter or two and then roundhouse kicking him a couple meters back.

The man jumped up quickly and yelled, "Water Style: Gunshot!" From his mouth, he spewed out multiple balls of water.

Thinking quickly, Naruto jumped to the left, getting clipped by the first speeding projectile, but missing the rest.

With a pained grunt, Naruto stumbled slightly as he scrambled to get away from the next volley of water bullets.

He briefly risked a glance over to his allies. Jiraiya seemingly wasn't trying too hard against his opponent, but was still putting up a decent fight. Naruto reasoned that he hadn't knocked the guy out by that point because he didn't want the students to give up, therefore not allowing the old man to watch Naruto. Meanwhile, Gaara and Ino weren't doing too badly. Gaara had taken to acting defensively, stopping the enemy whenever he attempted to attack, and should he actually get out a jutsu, which Naruto quickly noted was of the lightning variety, the sand moved to protect them.

Naruto heard his opponent rushing towards him, so he stopped paying attention to his allies to focus on his own battle. He summoned up another hundred clones and rushed at his foe. He stopped when he heard, "Fire Style: Great Fireball Jutsu!"

Naruto looked over to their first opponent, the fire-user, who, despite being restrained at the hands and ankles by rope, had somehow managed to let loose another fireball. Naruto couldn't help but let out a girlish shriek as the fireball came at him.

Gaara noticed this just in time to send his sand to his friend's aid, unfortunately leaving him open to attack. The lightning-user noticed this and slipped past Ino, kicking Gaara in the face, his sand unable to protect him so long as it remained around Naruto. Gaara managed to maintain the sand cocoon around Naruto, but only barely as his enemy started shooting lightning at him.

As soon as the fire was no longer a danger, Naruto pushed his way out of the sand's cover, clocking his enemy hard enough over the head to knock him out. 'Finally!' He yelled in his thoughts, slightly annoyed. He turned his attention to the restrained fire-user, who smiled sheepishly. Naruto approached him, snarling angrily, and smacked him, knocking him out.

With two of the three foes taken care of, Naruto rushed to his friends. Gaara's sand had returned to him, refusing to allow him to be hurt further, so the lightning-user tried to focus on Ino. Unfortunately for him, Gaara was having none of that shit and he ordered his sand to pick up half of a nearby fallen tree.

Naruto stared at the tree, which was currently raised over their foe. "Um, dude, I know I shouldn't try to help the enemy in any way, but…" Naruto paused for a moment, "There is a tree over your head…"

The lightning user paused and looked at Naruto like he was crazy. In response, Naruto pointed upward. The man's eyes widened in shock and fright, and he slowly raised his hands in surrender.

Naruto chuckled as he approached Gaara. "Dude, please tell me it's possible to do that."

"Do what?"

"Control sand! That shit is unbelievable!"

"Naruto, this came from Shukaku."

Naruto huffed. "Fucking lucky! I mean, I love Kurama, don't get me wrong, but controlling sand like that! Think about all of the things that I wouldn't have to do!"

"Like what?"

"Well, in plenty of fights, I could just stand there like a stoic badass with my arms crossed and take down anyone! If I wanted to make some ramen but didn't want to get up, I could just make it with sand!"

"Wouldn't parts of the sand get infused with the food, though?"

"No, after all, you can control every single grain, right?"

"…True, I guess."

"Hey guys, stop standing around!" Ino yelled. The two boys turned their attention to her briefly. They then both looked over to Jiraiya, who had finished his fight at one point or another and had tied the Jonin to a tree. They returned their attention to Ino and proceeded to help her out.

After a couple minutes, all of the enemy team was tied up, with the fire-user gagged to prevent him from using a fire jutsu should he wake.

"So, why are you here?" Jiraiya asked the Jonin.

"Why should I tell you?" The Jonin replied, clearly unhappy at his team being taken down by a bunch of Genin and an old man.

"Because I've caught you and there is nothing else you can do. Besides, for all we know, you've got the wrong guy, and the one you're looking for is somewhere else."

"We were sent on a mission to assassinate a man from another land."

"Which land?"

"Books."

"Do you know why the person wants him dead?" Naruto suddenly interjected.

"The hell if I know, dumbass!" The Jonin yelled.

"Naruto, calm down. Now then…" Jiraiya acted as though he was thinking. "I'm afraid I don't know a man from a 'land of Books.'"

Naruto desperately tried to keep a straight face while he processed this. When he did, he almost smirked upon realizing that it meant that Jiraiya was lying, possibly to avoid having to deal with the enemy team any longer.

The Jonin stared at Jiraiya intently, seeing if he could spot any signs that he was lying. "The man accompanying you fits the description much too closely. He was also said to be going to the Leaf, where you clearly hail from. I cannot believe you," he finally decided.

Jiraiya sighed. "Come on, I'm trying to let you guys go with no further injuries."

"Yeah, and if we give up, we won't get paid and have wasted a whole damn week!" The water-user yelled indignantly.

"Well, too fucking bad!" Naruto said, quickly becoming annoyed just as angry. He turned to Jiraiya. "So what do we do with them?"

"I would prefer to not kill them," Jiraiya said. "Go pack up our stuff, we're leaving. I'll deal with them."

Five minutes later, Team Animal, Jiraiya and the man from the land of Books were walking again.

"So… what did you do with them?" Ino asked after a moment.

"Ah, I just catapulted them across the land," Jiraiya answered casually.

"You did what?!" "Wow!" "…"

These were the reactions of the three children.

"B-but how? Wouldn't flinging them like that kill them!?" Ino almost yelled.

Jiraiya chuckled. "No, no. You see, I summoned a toad, who then took them over there."

"But wouldn't that take forever?"

"No, see, they have reverse summoning spots all across the lands. They can get there in a snap."

"Sweet!" Naruto yelled. "Can you teach me to do that?! Only with a cooler animal?"

Jiraiya frowned. "Toads are plenty cool!"

"No they aren't!"

"Tell you what, kid. When we get back, go research summons. If you can find a contract that's close to Konoha, and it is 'cool' enough for you, I'll get you a contract with it."

"Fuck yeah!" Naruto yelled, excited.

About a week later, the three children, old man, and resident of the land of Books arrived at their destination.

Naruto looked around, interested. Everyone who wasn't clearly working was reading a book. Hell, even some of the people who were carrying baskets of produce, going to the market to get rid of their fruits and veggies were reading if they had a couple fingers handy. Many of them looked up briefly when they heard the roar of the motor propelling the boat heading for the island. They saw their buddy and ran up to greet him, still clutching their books. The man grinned happily upon getting off the boat. He was swamped and dragged away but the eager book readers.

Naruto waved briefly to the man, who stopped and turned around long enough to shout out a small 'thank you' to the Leaf ninja. By that point in the day, it was very dark, so Jiraiya decided that they would stay the night at the small, free hotel available to them.

Unknown to the three children, while they were settling down in their respective rooms, Jiraiya was taking the opportunity to trade some of his novels with the locals in an attempt to get them hooked on his writings.

Two weeks later, Konoha was finally within view of the team. Naruto grew excited, breaking into a run. "We're back!" He yelled happily. He spun around on his heel, facing his team, walking backwards as fast as he could manage without falling over. "Come on, guys!"

Gaara and Ino briefly glanced at each other, smiles crawling onto their faces as Naruto's enthusiasm spread like a wildfire. They broke into a jog to catch up with their friend, but all three skid to a halt when they saw the guards at the gate. They wore beige-colored vests and their hitai-ate identified them from the Sand.

Seeing the children's sudden halt, Jiraiya sped up. He too stopped when he saw the Sand ninja. He walked forward after a moment of analyzing the situation. The guards spotted him quickly and one approached him. "State your business!" The guard shouted in a professional fashion.

Jiraiya frowned. "We are returning from a mission. Why are you here?"

"We don't have to tell you anything." The guard glanced behind the old man to assess his squad. He spotted Gaara, and his eyes widened. "Gaara-san!" He shouted. The other guard took notice of this development and ran off, presumably to alert a higher-up.

Gaara, seeing that there was no escape now, approached. Naruto and Ino followed, flanking him, appearing almost as though they were his bodyguards. "What is it?" He asked. "Why are you here?"

"Kazekage-sama caught wind that you had been taken away from the village on a mission. So we invaded the Leaf, awaiting your return!"

Gaara's jaw dropped in shock, and if the situation wasn't so dire, Naruto would have laughed at it. Instead, he kept a straight face until he fully processed the information he was fed, at which point his expression turned to one of alarm akin to Gaara's. He took a step forward.

"You didn't hurt the old man, right?!"

"Which old man?"

"The Hokage!"

"Oh, him? He gave up pretty quickly, otherwise the civilians would get hurt and all resources would be destroyed.

"T-total war… over one boy…?" Naruto asked slowly, his gaze slowly falling to the ground.

"I wouldn't say 'total' war," the guard said.

"But isn't that the technical definition? To destroy resources and harm the civilians?" Ino asked.

The guard thought for a moment. "Yes…" he muttered.

"Then it's total war," Gaara said, annoyed, crossing his arms. "Isn't that going over the top?"

"Kazekage-sama will not tolerate you leaving the Sand."

Gaara stared, dumbfounded. "If I want to leave the Sand, then that's my own damn choice! You butt out! Besides, that doesn't mean that I planned to leave, dumbass, I was just going to help Naruto-kun!"

"It's a tad late to inform us of this, you know. Now then, if you would just return to the Sand with us, we will leave the Leaf alone and intact. We will not harm it, so long as it doesn't try to harm us."

Gaara seemed to struggle with processing all that was happening. He opened his mouth to answer when there was an excited shout and suddenly there was the Kazekage and his two children standing there beside the guard. Behind them was a large number of Sand ninja.

Gaara's sister stepped forward. "Gaara! You're back!"

"Y-yeah," Gaara answered. "Temari-" He started to speak, but was cut off.

"Come on, let's go home! This damn forest is freezing."

"It's not that bad," Gaara said.

"Well, you were always fucking nuts, so of course you'd think that." Temari turned to her father. "We can go now, right?"

The Kazekage nodded. "Yes." He looked to the guard, who had been patiently waiting beside them. "Go gather up the rest of our troops."

"Yes, Kazekage-sama!" He ran off in search of the rest of the Sand shinobi.

Within a couple minutes, all of the Sand invaders were at the gate. Also, the Hokage and almost the whole village's Jonin and ANBU came with them, just in case they tried to do anything.

The Sand shinobi began walking. Gaara looked back solemnly at Naruto and Ino, who appeared just as saddened upon seeing him have to leave. He slowed his pace considerably, until his father started to drag him.

"I don't want to go," he suddenly realized in a low whisper.

"What?" The Kazekage asked, glancing at his son.

Gaara stopped walking, digging his heels into the ground to stop his father. "I won't go!" He said firmly, staring his father in the eye.

All of the Sand ninja within earshot of Gaara's exclamation stopped in shock. The ones that didn't hear him and didn't stop rather comically ran into the ones that had.

"What?!" The Kazekage repeated, this time seemingly mad.

"I won't go back to the Sand! I haven't gotten to speak to a lot of the villagers here, but the ones I have don't see me as a monster or a weapon! They see a person, regardless of how crazy this person may be, they still don't see an evil entity that'll gouge out their eyes."

"That doesn't mean it won't remain that way."

"I don't care! There are more people here that care then in the Sand. Look!" He lifted up his shirt, revealing the seal Jiraiya placed on him. "Someone cared enough to make sure Shukaku won't get out anymore without my consent. Someone cared enough to think of me when it was decided to send Naruto to the woods to improve his mental state. I don't care what you say, I'm not going!"

"You are returning!"

"Let Gaara-kun decide for himself!" Naruto yelled, stepped forward and, in an extremely rude gesture that should have gotten him killed, shoved the Kazekage.

Normally, Gaara would have been annoyed at Naruto and his lack of tact. At this particular moment, however, he didn't quite care. Instead, he grabbed Naruto and rushed away. They reached Jiraiya and stood beside him, knowing that he was famously powerful despite his age.

"You do realize that may have just killed us all, right?" Ino asked.

"Yes, I do," Naruto said grimly. "But I'm not just going to sit around while Gaara-kun's yelling that he won't leave."

The Kazekage snarled and ordered an attack. Gaara brought up his sand around them to defend them. There was clearly a skirmish going on outside the sand. The Hokage and his other ninja must have jumped in to defend them.

"What are we going to?" Ino asked.

"Run?" Naruto suggested.

"That doesn't sound like the best option. It might get us killed."

"And standing here won't?"

"Gaara-kun's sand can protect us."

"Not for long," Gaara informed them. "Father has gold dust."

"…So?" Naruto asked.

"He can control it like my sand. He can counteract my sand with it."

"How?"

"Oh, because he can mix it into the sand, right?" Ino guessed.

"Yes," Gaara responded grimly.

"…And that means what now?" Naruto asked, getting frustrated.

"Gold is heavier than sand, and if it's supporting a shape like this, then it will just be weighed down," Ino explained to him.

"Oh, so then if the Kazekage gets to us, he can just weigh down our shield," Naruto realized.

"Yes," Gaara said.

"Shit."

"Yes."

Suddenly, a grin appeared on Naruto's face. "We can still run, though!"

"What? Naruto-kun, I thought I told you, that idea's stupid!" Ino told him, exasperated.

"No, we change into animals and run into the forest. We know it better than them. If anyone tries to follow, we can easily cut them down!"

Gaara and Ino were silent for a moment, thinking this over.

"It's probably the best, and most crazy and stupid, idea that Naruto-kun's ever come up with," Gaara said. "I say we do it!" Ino quickly agreed.

Ino and Naruto changed into their animal forms and got ready to bolt. Gaara prepared as well, still in human form to maintain the sand shield. Suddenly, the sand structure began to collapse. "He found us," Gaara said frantically. "GO!" He started running, changing form mid-stride. Naruto and Ino bolted as well, almost ramming headfirst into the sand, which disappeared just in time due to Gaara's transformation.

The three bolted into the woods. Gaara faintly heard Shukaku's voice in his head, warning him that through the seal he could fell the presence of… someone. He couldn't identify if it was friend or foe, however, due to the seal interfering with his abilities. That, and/or he just might not know the person.

Gaara relayed the information to his friends. They stopped, unsure if they could take on a Jonin or higher, but knowing that they couldn't outrun them.

"You guys are surprisingly quick," said a seemingly young man. Suddenly, an ANBU, with a wolf mask, appeared in front of them. They relaxed slightly upon realizing that it was not a Sand ninja.

Naruto changed back into a human. "Shouldn't you be with the fight?"

The man shook his head. "No. Hokage-sama assigned me to look after you when he saw you bolt."

"But…" Naruto paused. "Good, good. I can deal with that. When you left, who was winning?"

"Neither. A good number of both sides have been cut down."

"What about old man Hokage? He's still alive, right?"

"He ordered me to follow you. As far as I can tell, he's still kicking."

"Good," Naruto smiled. "You're surprisingly nonchalant for an ANBU."

"Yes, well, you're a bunch of children. What will the harm be if I'm not super formal?"

"True."

Gaara nudged him, gesturing further into the forest.

"He's right. We should continue."

"Where are you going?" The ANBU asked.

"Further into the forest. We figure that we know the layout better than any Sand shinobi, and we can cut them down that much easier."

The ANBU nodded. "Fair enough. Let's go."

"So, Okami-san, what do you plan to do if the Kazekage comes after us?" Naruto asked as they took off.

"I plan to fight. So long as one wishes to remain in the village, I will fight to protect them," the wolf-masked ANBU answered.

Naruto smiled. "I guess your mask fits then."

"That's what my friends tell me." The ANBU suddenly jumped, twirling around and chucking a kunai. There was the sound of a man dying as 'Okami,' as Naruto had taken to calling him, landed and continuing as though nothing happened.

"What the hell!?" Naruto yelled, glancing behind him and subsequently almost ran into a tree before Okami pulled him out of the way.

"Oh, there was a Sand shinobi approaching. So I cut him down as he tried to get though some bushes."

"OK…"

Team Animal slowed down as they realized they were in familiar territory.

"Hey, our old training area!" Naruto said happily, glancing around at the fallen tree that had been knocked over during Shukaku's attack. "We can hide out in the cave for a while."

"I bet it'll reek," Ino muttered to Gaara, who nodded his agreement.

"I don't think a cave is a good idea," Okami said.

"Why not? We can only be attacked from one direction, and it's rather small, so it'll be difficult to attack in. Even then, we can just shield ourselves with Gaara-kun's sand. Only the Kazekage can get through it, and if he's here, then we're screwed anyway, right?"

"True. Lead the way then."

A minute later, they arrived at the cave. All four of them sniffed the air.

"It smells like something died," Okami commented.

"Well, we did eat dead animals in here," Naruto said.

"No, you've been gone for nearly four weeks, if I remember correctly. This smells much more recent," Okami settled down on the ground, alert, but also very relaxed.

Naruto tensed as there was movement from outside the cave. Gaara immediately changed form and brought up his sand. There was an animalistic roar of annoyance, and something started to scrap at the shield. Claws raked through the sand, the hole that was opened closing shortly after.

"Apparently that bear's back, and he's stolen our cave. Great," Naruto sighed.

"You… know the bear?" Okami asked.

"Yeah, ran into him a while back."

"You fought a bear?"

"Briefly. We ended up sparing him and having Ino-chan take him to… somewhere."

Okami glanced at Ino. "You're a Yamanaka, aren't you?"

Ino nodded in response.

"So… what are we going to do about the bear? We have to do something eventually."

Okami started to rummage through his weapon's pouch. He pulled out a small veil.

"What's that?"

"A poison that'll put him to sleep." He applied the poison a kunai. "Drop the sand," he ordered.

Gaara did so, and while the bear was staring at them in confusion, Okami tossed the kunai with deadly precision, although it appeared very lazy given his relaxed position.

The bear was hit in the shoulder, and Gaara brought his sand back up a moment later while the poor beast was roaring in pain.

With that issue over with, Naruto turned his attention back to the cave that he used to inhabit. It was littered with bones, and absolutely reeked.

"This guy does not clean up after himself," he commented, kicking a nearby bone.

"No shit," Gaara said, kicking it back before sitting down. He turned to Okami. "So, how long do you figure we'll be stuck in here?"

Okami sighed. "Anywhere from a couple minutes to an hour or two. You know, Gaara-kun, this could lead to an all out war."

"As in… eventually both sides will forget why they're fighting to begin with?" Naruto asked.

"…Likely."

"Great…"

The four of them settled down in the cave, prepared to wait out the attack.

So, guess who's under the mask? Here's a hint, some suggested him for 'sensei status' and I couldn't resist at least putting him into story in one form or another. Okami means wolf, by the way. Also great deity, which I learned from the game Okami, which is a bit of pun because you play as a wolf that's also a god.

And with that, I bid you and yours a very merry non-denominational winter solstice festival, and a very merry New Years as well.