Warning: hinted relationship ahead, this time of the Pumbaa and Timon variety, to fulfill a request from a reader and inspirational writer. If you don't like, then please, go back. I won't stop you.

But I swear to god, it's as clean as I could make it, I promise! As raunchy as this fic is, I swear that these two characters, along with others of my favorite animal Disney characters, will be handled as respectfully as I could make them out to be.

BTW, if you happen to know who I'm referencing in this fic, then please don't get mad and flame happy. This was all done for the sake of entertainment and parody, not to hurt anyone's feelings, though it might look like the opposite.

~Extra: Timon and his Stu/Sue~

Clopin's Voiceover: A few hours before our heroes went down to the library that evening, a certain meerkat went through issues of his own, of the Sue kind. Let's watch the humiliation and creepiness, shall we?

Being a meerkat in a school where the majority of the student body is bigger and stronger than you, Timon rarely considered his small size the best thing in the world. It wasn't that he had a complex or anything; Timon was a meerkat, and damn it, he was proud of that. But sometimes being small had its disadvantages...as well as advantages themselves.

"Okay, the coast is clear," he whispered to himself as he turned a corner. "Now, I just have to—"

"Timon, my love!" A high pitched voice cried from across the hall, "I see you!"

Timon slumped, his eyes hooded wryly. "Ah, crud."

He turned to face a female meerkat with the fur that was the same shade, and featured the stripes like that of a tiger—who ran straight for him.

"My adorable meerkat!" She hugged him, to which Timon immediately stiffened. "How are you?"

"I was fine until you got here," he muttered under his breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing." Timon sighed and put his hands on her shoulders, putting about an arm's length of distance between them. "Listen, Miss—"

"Eimon!" She beamed.

"Right." He returned her smile with a strained version, trying to avoid direct eye contact. "I don't think I made this clear when we met this morning—"

"Oh, Timon, you don't have any idea how many times I've thought about our meeting," Eimon gushed. "I've dreamed of this since I was a little girl; meeting you, you immediately falling in love with me, us having babies," she broke off sighing, looking up at him dreamily.

Timon's smile became more strained as he sweated nervously. "Uh-huh," he grit out.

"Now, what was it you wanted to tell me?"

Our favorite meerkat stared at the obviously unwell female for a good few moments before coughing awkwardly into his fist.

"Eimon, I need you to understand something about…this," he gestured between the two of them. "It's never going to happen."

Eimon blinked, her smile twitching. "What do you mean?" she asked with a slight edge in her light voice.

Timon sighed. He really didn't want to hurt this person, but if this is what it had to come down to, then so be it. He gripped her shoulder and looked directly into her eyes, his face stern and serious (contrary to his usual carefree personality).

"I'm gay."

Eimon's smile stayed frozen on as she stared at him for a long, long time. Timon stared back at her, to show that he wasn't fooling around.

Then, finally:

"Silly, I knew that."

That threw Timon over. He gaped at her in disbelief.

"You did?! Then why the hell won't you leave me alone?"

"Because I wanted to introduce me to my alter-ego."

Timon raised an eyebrow. "Alter-ego?"

Eimon nodded enthusiastically, and then she spun around at rapid speed, to the point that she was as blurry as Tasmanian Devil, when he went on his rampages. After a while, the spinning stopped and revealed someone who took Eimon's place.

The male meerkat, who looked oddly like Timon with more hair, flipped his black hair and smiled at Timon sultrily.

"Hi," spoke a baritone voice.

Timon blinked, and blinked, and blinked some more. Then he slowly turned around.

"…I'm out of here."

The Gary Stu meerkat blinked, and then he ran after Timon, panicked. Because of his power of super speed, he was able to tackle Timon to the floor, to which Timon glared at him.

"Get off me!" He kicked the meerkat- Stu off him.

"Wait, baby, give me a chance," he begged on his knees, strangely not looking damaged from the kick. "I'll absolutely kill myself if you don't!"

Timon's eyes narrowed. "You're bluffing."

"No lie, mate. My life is just not worth living if you're not in it." He brandished a bloody razor blade from behind him and showed it to Timon, who gaped in horror. "Would you like me to demonstrate?"

"No!" Timon choked out. As much as he felt dislike for this guy, he didn't want him to hurt himself. "Dear Walt, no!"

The Stu tossed his blade away and grinned, clasping his hands hopefully. "Does that mean you'll hear me out?"

Timon sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I guess."

"Okay, well to start, my name is Rico," he said dramatically. "And I have the power to summon the dark, deadly powers of the Greek god, Hades!"

Hades popped out of nowhere, inducing many a fan girl scream (don't lie; I know you would if he was real), and grinned. "Did somebody call me?"

Ignoring the god's cameo, Timon crossed his arms and looked at Rico skeptically, tapping his fingers against his arm in steady beats.

"Powers, huh?"

Why do these Sues and Stus insist on having powers of some kind? Can't they just be normal for once, instead of being so cliché?

Rico nodded, and gestured towards him. "And you! You, my dear Timon, are meant to be my lovely, loyal mate, always fighting by my side, because you can't live without me!"

Timon's eye twitched. Lovely?!?! He glared hard at Rico, his hands fisted on either side. Seriously, what is with everyone feminizing me? Just because I'm gay, small, and occasionally cross-dress…

He stopped that thought right there, blinked thoughtfully for a few minutes, and then sighed. Okay, I get the point.

His glare returned, But still!

He was about to retort to Rico's comment, but was forced into shocked silence when he felt the Stu wrap an arm around his waist and pull him in. Rico stared into his eyes "lovingly" and stroked his shoulder, while Timon's eyes were wide with alarm.

"Now, let's mate, love," Rico said and puckered his lips.

Timon got his composure back and immediately started struggling. He put his hands on the Stu's chest and tried to pull out of his grip.

"Let go of me, you jerk!" he yelled out angrily.

Rico either didn't hear or he ignored him. His eyes stayed closed and he continued to push forward with puckered lips. Timon was neither amused, nor "enamored".

"I said, let me—"

Before he could complete the sentence, Timon found himself pulled back by a strong force and stood stunned.

Rico knew something was wrong when he realized his Chosen was out of his arms, so he opened his eyes…

And found himself looking up at a very, very mad warthog—who had a shocked Timon sheltered behind one of its frontal legs, presumably the one that pulled him away.

The Stu was so scared that he immediately changed his gender back into the Sue, who looked up at Pumbaa with as much fright and shock as the warthog's flared nostrils snorted furiously in her face.

Timon blinked a few times, looking from Pumbaa to Eimon, and then he finally smirked. He climbed up on his huge companion and looked down at the Sue from his usual spot, on top of Pumbaa's head.

At the same time, Eimon recovered also, albeit nervously, since Pumbaa didn't let up his glare.

"OMG, Pumbaa," she laughed nervously. "You have no idea how much I've wanted to meet you also—"

She broke off when one of Pumbaa's hoofs gripped her from the scruff of her neck, and lifted her to eye level.

"Leave Timon alone, and never come near him again—whether you're male or female," he growled with distaste.

Eimon gulped and shrank back from the glower.

"Oh, and sweetie," she looked up to find Timon smiling down at her. "You and your 'alter-ego' might as well get that 'mating' idea out of your head. In case you haven't realized, we weren't drawn with those…things," he gagged slightly. "In fact, no anthropomorphic animal in W.D. was. Ergo, intercourse with any of us, whether you're human or animal, is impossible."

Eimon gaped up at Timon in horror—as if not having "fun" with cartoon animals was disgusting—and heartbreak.

How could he not love me? Her eyes watered. I've loved him my entire life! According to the stalker-fan-girl formula, he should return my love! And as for the no mate thing…I'm ruined! Oh, my life is so empty now—it's over!

Timon smirked and waved at her. "Bye bye."

Taking that as a signal, Pumbaa threw the Sue down the long hallway. The two animals watched as they heard her screams fade out of hearing distance, and then Timon sighed with relief.

"Problem solved! Thank Walt."

Pumbaa rolled his eyes to look at Timon. "Are you sure we weren't too hard on her?"

Timon waved it off nonchalantly. "I already showed my disinterest in both of them. It's not my fault that they didn't take the hint. Besides, sometimes you have to be a little rough with these guys to give them a reality check."

"…I guess so." Pumbaa looked down at his hooves, feeling distraught and self-conscious all of a sudden.

Timon didn't have to see the sad look in his best friend's eyes to know that something was wrong. He stood up and slid down to the warthog's snout to look at him.

"What's wrong, buddy?" he asked gently.

Pumbaa's eyes watered a little. "Don't you get lonely without other meerkats around you? I mean, I just don't understand why you'd overlook them for," he shrugged his haunches pointedly, "this."

Timon smiled. "Pumbaa, Pumbaa, Pumbaa—please; I've been around meerkats all my life. I grew up in a colony, for Walt's sake. I've already seen whatever my kind has to offer, and frankly, I got really bored, really fast.

"You, on the other hand, make my life," he paused to think of the right word, "interesting."

Pumbaa brightened up at that. "Really?"

"Really, really." Timon climbed back up to rest on his head, and stroked the warthog's black mane. "Now, let's go get something to eat, pal."

Pumbaa felt a familiar warmth spread from his heart, to all over his body, and he grinned, feeling satisfied.

"Okay."

O.K. I know that the end part might annoy you, especially with Timon saying that sex between the animal Disney characters was impossible.

You might see that as unnecessary and stupid, but I felt I had to come up with that little "loophole", for my own personal reasons.

Part 4 is about two thirds done, but please be patient. The new semester just started, and though my schedule is more flexible than the fall, I still have a lot of work. Especially for sociology.