Connie had to admit, chemotherapy was turning out to be a real snooze fest. She'd arrived at the treatment centre that morning alone. She was being stoic when she had declared neither Sam nor Grace could accompany her, deciding she didn't want either of them having to witness her being pumped full of poison.
The lounge she sat in was comfortable, it was filled with large comfy reclining chairs where other patients who were receiving treatment sat. The décor wasn't distasteful either unlike the oncology ward at Holby. Although having received her surgery at Holby City Hospital, she had only managed one appointment on the oncology ward before she'd made the resolute decision that she was not going to be having further treatment there. Jac she had trusted, albeit unknowingly, with her life. However, the clown of a consultant who had thought it sensible to joke about her cancer was not extended the same courtesy. After that one appointment she had gone private.
As a young nurse approached she smiled softly explaining to Connie the exact dosages of the medications she was about to administer. Connie may not have worked here but locally her reputation preceded her. "Quite a hefty cocktail," she commented before gesturing with her free hand to the cannula, "go ahead, hook me up." As the nurse did she spoke Connie through the effects the first lot of drugs would have on her, the pre-meds designed to gently prepare her body for the stronger drugs.
"You'll probably feel quite whoozy to begin with. That is perfectly normal. I'll be back in about 20 minutes to hook you up to the next IV."
Looking around the room at all the other patients sitting with family she sighed softly and leant back in her chair, her eyes fixating on the clear liquid dripping slowly through the tubes. Her eyes followed the tubes down to the exact point it where the cocktail of chemicals entered her body and started to flow with her blood. The nurse had been right, she had started to feel light headed. Sighing she closed her eyes and let herself float on a cloud into a drug induced nap.
She'd been there for three hours now and the heady cocktail of pre-meds had worn off somewhat now and she was clock watching. She was beginning to regret the decision not to allow her loved ones to accompany her as she watched other patients with their relatives. To her left was an elderly gentleman who sat with his wife as they completed a crossword together. Allowing her eyes to close she started to imagine that being Sam and her in 20 years, the two of them growing old together as Grace went off to university and started her own family, the two of them running around after grandchildren and enjoying their life together. Suddenly tears sprung into her eyes and her breath caught in her chest as her daydreams took a sinister turn. She had faded from the images in her head. Sam and Grace were still there but she was not. Jolting her eyes open she darted her eyes around the room in panic.
The lady to her right leant over to her. "Are you okay dear? Shall I get a nurse?"
"No! I mean, yes I'm fine, I don't need a nurse" Connie said as she wiped her eyes, pausing for a moment before continuing, "Thank you for your concern." She didn't look like the steely surgeon now, she looked vulnerable and small.
"That's alright dear, we all have to look out for one another." Connie smiled with a small nod.
"I'm Connie."
"June." The woman responded.
It only felt like minutes later when the machines attached to Connie pinged signalling the end of her treatment for today. Connie had passed the time talking to June and the pair had found a lot to talk about. For Connie it had been cathartic talking to someone who understood how she was feeling about fighting cancer. Speaking to someone who she had no emotional attachment to had allowed her to be honest and frank about her insecurities and fears without worrying about upsetting them. "Well that is me done for today, it has been lovely speaking to you, June. No doubt we will meet again." She smiled as the older woman, gathered her belongings and headed off to meet Sam in reception.