Please see first chapter for disclaimer, rating, warnings, pairing, etc.

Part 11/?

-Chapter 10-

Hushed

Awareness crept back to Teyla by miniscule degrees. First, she realized the screaming ache in her head had dulled to a minor throb. Second, she discovered her nausea had completely disappeared. And third, while her body still ached and felt weighted by an overwhelming tiredness, in general she did feel better. Experimentally, she twitched just a little, wondering if her other symptoms would come back. Thankfully, they didn't.

"Teyla?" A hand brushed across her forehead, then down her cheek. "Thank goodness. Your fever's broken."

"Ronon?" she croaked. My, but she was hoarse! She carefully cracked open her eyes to look up at him.

"You're finally awake!" Ronon shifted his hand from her face to her shoulder, gently squeezing. "I was wondering if you ever would. Charin said it would take a while for the medicine to kick in, to make you better since you'd worn yourself out so badly – but I was starting to get really worried."

Teyla blinked, just then realizing the major improvement in his own appearance. Although dark circles still made shadowy stains under his eyes and he looked much thinner than normal, his skin was much closer to its normal healthy color, and he was actually smiling at her. "You look – good," she whispered.

Ronon grinned. "Didn't take long for Charin to perfect the herbal mix we needed. The entire village has been dosed. Most of us are all but well. Only a few people, including you, are still recovering."

She looked around, confused. "We are back in our tent."

"Charin let me bring you home once the worst of it passed. We've been back – oh, just a little over a day now."

Teyla nearly choked. "A day?"

Ronon avoided her gaze. "Actually – you've been in and out for almost three. You probably don't remember too much of it. You were delirious most of the time. Took quite a lot of work to get you to drink, so you wouldn't die." His expression abruptly went drawn as he remembered things she could not.

"How many died?" she whispered.

He hesitated a moment too long. "Teyla – right now is not a good time to talk about that. You need to concentrate on feeling better—"

"I do feel better," Teyla said, her fists weakly clenching on the blankets covering her as she willed herself to rise onto her elbows. Even the shaky thinness of her voice did not blunt the note of determined command in it. "Tell me."

Ronon bowed his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Twenty four. Including six of the Elders."

Teyla melted back onto her pallet, feeling what little bit of strength she'd regained dissolve into shock. Twenty four! And six of the Elders – that leaves only three, including Charin! Tears silently welled into her eyes and spilled down her temples into her hair. She'd resented, even hated, the Elders' bullying of her, but she hadn't want any of them to die. The Ancestors were surely punishing her. . . A crushing weight lowered onto her chest, causing her to cough through her tears. Added to those lost in the last culling, the village had diminished by almost half.

Leaning over her, Ronon gently swiped at her eyes with a cloth. "Don't cry," he begged. "This is why I didn't want to tell you! You'll make yourself worse again." Setting the cloth aside, he leaned over to wrap his arms around her shoulders and lift her into a hug.

She wanted to struggle against him; to shove him away and tell him just to leave her alone. But somehow, she couldn't find any strength of will within her to do so. It felt so good, having someone hold her and comfort her. The security of his arms around her and his face pressed close to hers made her cling to him instead of shoving him away, as her first impulse had been to do. Ever since her father's death had forced her to take over leadership of the Athosians, she'd felt like she had to be the strong one; the one everyone came to in order to cry on her shoulder. But she'd never felt she had someone to be there for her: to comfort her; to hug her; to offer her kind words, assurances, or be a shoulder for her to cry on. It felt good, for once, being the one soothed, instead of the one doing the soothing.

Ronon kept one arm around her shoulders as he smoothed the other through her hair. He murmured Satedan words she couldn't understand, his tone soothing. She needed that more than the meaning of the actual words at the moment. Teyla buried her face against his shoulder, and allowed her grief to pour out as a flood of tears that drenched his shirt as he comforted her.

Eventually, as her river of heartache eased into a few sniffles, Ronon spoke. "It's still snowing outside."

The words seemed so benign, so anticlimactic to what he'd said before, the hysterical laughter she hadn't released days before unexpectedly came bursting out of her. She laughed until she hiccupped, and coughed, and could barely breathe. Ronon stared at her, obvious concern in his eyes. Teyla sensed him wondering if the entire situation had made her lose her mind. She momentarily wondered the same thing herself, but shoved the thought aside. It simply felt so good, after all that crying, to laugh again. She tried, and failed, to smother a final hiccup. "Would you like to go out in it and play?" she asked.

His eyebrows drawing together as his forehead creased, Ronon pressed the back of his hand against her forehead, then moved it to her cheek. "Are you sure you're feeling better?" he asked. "No fever – are you okay?"

Tiredness reclaimed Teyla, reminding her she actually had been sick for a long time. But, for a little while, her overwhelming heartache was gone. "I am fine." She drew in a deep breath, wincing at how sore her ribs were. Crying, then laughing, then coughing, hadn't helped She didn't dare look at him. If he hated her before, what would he think of her now? Surely he wouldn't have confidence in her now, the little crybaby she'd just proved herself to be. She made an effort to steady herself; to return to her duty-anchored center. "There are things to be done – my people—"

Two fingers hooked under her chin and turned her face back toward Ronon. "Your people can wait, Teyla. They all understand what's going on. They're taking over for a while, working on keeping things going while you rest and recover. They're not going to judge you for taking time off so you won't kill yourself."

"But the Elders—" Then she remembered that most of the Elders were gone, and fresh waves of grief welled up inside her. "—I am their leader. I am responsible for their welfare. It was bad enough I could not discover the cure they needed so badly, and so many of them died. I do not have time to indulge in just lying here, doing nothing." Arms shaking under her with weakness, she started to sit up.

Ronon prevented her with firmly gentle hands on her shoulders. "Things are being taken care of, Teyla. Please, trust me." He smoothed her hair off her face with his thumbs, his green eyes dark with worry. "Charin has been by a number of times since I brought you home." He glanced over to the table, where a small cup sat next to a steaming pot of water. "She gave me something to give you. She knew you'd be like this. She insisted I put it in your tea, and make you drink it so you'd get the rest you need to recover." One of his eyebrows quirked upward. "Do I have you drug you, Teyla, to make you get the rest you need?"

This time, Teyla knew she wouldn't win. She yielded to his gently pressing hands, allowing him to ease her back down onto her pallet. "No," she acquiesced. "I promise to be a good girl and sleep."

Tucking loose curls of her hair behind her ear, Ronon smiled and nodded. "Good." Reaching up, he turned down the lamp above her sleeping pallet. "Rest well."

Teyla closed her eyes. Something hovered at the very back of her mind, nagging at her. She began counting days, from that moment back to when the epidemic started, then back to her and Ronon's wedding day. Drowsily, she opened her eyes again. "Ronon?"

He looked up from the book he had propped against his knees. He'd settled himself at the head of her bed, close by in case she needed him. "What's wrong? Do you need something?"

She licked her lips. "I missed your fifteenth birthday." For some reason, that made her feel very sad.

Ronon looked back down at his book, his expression oddly frustrated. "I was hoping you wouldn't know."

"Your mother mentioned it to me, the last time she visited." How long ago has that been, again? She couldn't remember. Her eyelids felt heavy, but she wasn't finished. She still had one more very important thing to say. "I am sorry, Ronon." Not only am I bad leader, I am a horrible wife. Not that she and Ronon had ever expected their marriage to be normal. But still – she needed to be at least civil toward him. And he was still her best friend.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Don't worry about it," he said. "It's just another day. Besides, there were far more important things to worry about." Ronon gently patted her shoulder. "Go to sleep, Teyla." There was a definite sigh in his voice.

Instead of arguing, Teyla rolled onto her side, back to him, and obediently closed her eyes. "Good night, Ronon," she said softly.

"Good night."

When she was almost asleep, one more thing occurred to her. "Thank you. For – everything."

She didn't remember hearing Ronon's response, if he did give her one.

-Athos-

When Teyla awoke the second time, she felt warm and comfortable. Sighing in contentment, she snuggled her face a little deeper into her pillow, tugged her blankets a little tighter around her shoulders, and scooted back a little closer to the source of warmth behind her.

It moved.

Half-screaming, half-yelping, Teyla rolled around toward it, her elbow proceeding her.

The warm thing grunted when her elbow made contact. "Ow!" it complained.

"Ronon?!" She recognized his voice. "What – what are you doing?"

His sleepy green eyes stared at her from beneath half-closed eyelids. "You kept mumbling in your sleep," he muttered. "Kept saying you were 'cold, so cold.' I couldn't find more blankets, so – I-I decided to—" Blushing furiously, he started to roll away from her. "I'm sorry!" he half-growled.

"No, wait!" The words escaped Teyla's mouth before she could stop them. Of their own accord, her hands reached out to grasp his arm. "I am sorry. Please." She bit her lip. What had gotten into her?

Ronon squinted suspiciously at her. He studied her expression, her eyes. "You won't hit me again?"

Teyla flushed. "Not unless you – well – behave badly."

This time he was the one laughing till he began coughing. Teyla wasn't sure whether to be happy that he thought the idea was so absurd, or to be insulted because he didn't see her as an attractive girl. "That constitutes as behaving badly," she muttered.

His laughter faded into chuckles. "I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I think I must have had some of your tea by mistake."

No, it is just that our entire situation – our entire lives – are one big laughingstock. Teyla swallowed her words back, not wanting to hurt his feelings. "I am going back to sleep." It was abrupt, but the only thing she could think to say. She promptly rolled over, wondering if she could get back to sleep. Maybe this whole thing is a fever-induced nightmare, she thought fuzzily. Or a side effect of the herbs Charin gave me. Yes, that must be it. I am allergic to them. . .

Ronon was suddenly there again, a warm and comforting presence against her back. She moaned softly, deep inside her where he couldn't hear. The Ancestors are punishing me. I have failed them, like I have failed my people, and they want to make my life one long, miserable, confusing, tortured mess. It made sense, considering the circumstances. No other person, living or dead, could possibly have had so many unusual, torturous things happen to them. Particularly not in such a short time span.

Teyla floated in a semi-conscious haze, unable to sleep, but too tired to stay awake either. Despite the awkwardness of the situation, she was warm and comfortable, and didn't want to move. Or kick her free heat source out of bed. I am selfish, she sighed to herself.

Ronon mumbled something.

"What?" She spoke before she realized he was asleep. Well – it would appear I am not the only one who talks in my sleep. She waited for a while to see if he would talk again. When he didn't say anything after a while, she lowered her head back down to her pillow and closed her eyes.

"Teyla," he mumbled promptly.

She groaned again. Due to their positions, she could only crane her neck around to look at him. His eyes were closed, his face relaxed in sleep. "Shh," she admonished him.

"But I love you," he murmured insistently.

Teyla froze. Her eyes popped open wide, and her jaw dropped open. She swallowed hard, nearly choking herself in the process. In hindsight, it was a good thing – that way she couldn't scream "What did you just say?!" at him like she wanted.

Like the pieces of the puzzles she used to work as a small child, things started falling into place in her mind. The way he'd been acting toward her recently – the way she'd been acting toward him. The way she'd been feeling about him. She hadn't noticed, just thinking it was their budding friendship, or their forced civility toward each other in the face of their unfortunate situation.

Truth be told, Teyla realized, she was in love with him, too.

-To Be Continued-

Bunnylass: Thank you! Yes, I know! The one good thing about being sick is it gives me oodles of time to write, when otherwise I might not have had that time. So – I guess I should be thankful! I'm sorry I scared you a bit there, about them maybe not finding the cure. I'm really glad you found the part about Teyla's symptoms growing worse realistic, I was hoping it would be! Thank you so much for the review, and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Alexiel974: Wow, thank you! I'm so glad the last chapter was worth the wait – and I hope this one is, too! Thank you for the well-wishes, I do feel much better now! About time. LOL I'm glad you liked the way I wrote Teyla becoming ill, with the progression of her symptoms and everything. I'm really glad you also enjoyed the moment with Ronon – I admit I was a little scared myself writing it, and I knew what was going to happen! Things quiet down a bit in this chapter, so we'll see how long it lasts. . . Thank you so much for the review, and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

me: Thank you so much! Wow! It makes me so happy that you like this story so much you look for updates every other day, but it makes me feel embarrassed that I'm just now giving you one. I'm honored to hear that you like this as much as Enduring Love, and I hope you continue to enjoy it! Thank you so very much for the review, and I hope you enjoy this chapter!