A/N: SM owns all things Twilight. I'm just playing with her characters.
Thank you Fran for taking the time to edit all my mistakes, commas and spelling errors.
Twimom1960, klcivinski, and NKubie are my pre-readers and encouragement team. You guys are awesome. Thank you for your time and effort.
Don't let her be gone by Gord Bamford
I might have done it this time
I might have crossed that line
I said some things
She said some things
That we can't take back
Chapter 10
"Alice," Isabella started, the idea of her friend giving up on such a long relationship caused her worry. "Are you sure you want to do this?"
Alice sniffed, grabbing another tissue and wiping her nose. "I don't know. I really don't know what I want to do. All I know is that he hurt me by hurting you."
Lauren took her hand and squeezed. "Did he say why he didn't tell you? Why did he keep it a secret?"
Scoffing, Alice ripped the tissue apart. "He said that he couldn't tell me about his work." Standing from her chair, she started to pace. "Like hell, he can't! Especially when it concerns one of my best friends," she screeched, pointing at Isabella.
Refilling each of their cups, Lauren urged Alice to once again, take her seat. "I agree with you on that. He should have told you as soon as he found out. That wasn't right on his part."
Alice nodded frantically, shoveling heaps of sugar into her coffee. "Yes. So, why didn't he?"
Her face fell again and she looked over to Isabella, giving her a sad smile. "I'm sorry. This is hard enough for you and now I'm bringing my problems in here, too."
Smiling reassuringly, Isabella shook her head. "No. Don't. I should be the one who's sorry. I dragged you all in with me. My fucked up marriage and husband," she laughed humorlessly, briefly thinking of Mike and his fucking paranoia.
"Speaking of which," Lauren turned to Isabella. "Do you know if he'll sign the papers now or did he say anything?"
Isabella sighed, thinking of the previous day and how she left in a hurry. "I don't know," she started, curling her hands around the mug. "I left after Edward told me about the pictures and didn't wait around to see what Mike would do or say."
"Wait! What?" Lauren asked with wide eyes. "Edward was there? In Seattle?"
Isabella nodded. "Yeah, Mike's mother…," she started, rubbing her temple.
"Wait," Alice interrupted, causing both friends to look at her curiously. "Before you start, I have a confession to make."
Isabella nodded slowly. "What is it?"
Alice bit her lip, her hands trembling around her coffee mug. "I kind of, sort of, urged Edward to go to Seattle." She cringed away, awaiting her friend's wrath.
Isabella's heart stuttered in her chest. "What?"
"It's not what you think. I didn't know what he had done. Honest," she rambled, the words gushing out of her mouth. "I saw the two of you hit it off at the luau and then he spent the night in your hotel room. After you left, he was depressed, so I connected the dots. I asked him about it and he didn't deny what had happened or his feeling."
Silence engulfed the room.
Alice fiddled with her nails, nervous and anxious for Isabella's reaction.
Lauren looked between the two of them; waiting and watching.
Isabella blinked, absorbing the new information. "Why would you ask him to come to Seattle?"
She knew her friends had been worried and she felt guilty, having cut off contact with them for a few months. She had her reasons and maybe, just maybe her friends would understand as to why she did it.
Alice huffed, rolling her eyes. "Because you weren't answering our calls and we were worried nearly to death with the possibilities of what Mike could do to you. If someone could reach you, I knew it would be him," she trailed off, her gaze moving to the table. "Well, at least so I thought. Instead, he made it worse," she murmured into her coffee.
Isabella took her mug to the sink, rinsing it out and putting it in the dish rack. Her eyes strayed outside. The sun was bright, bathing the entire neighborhood in light, not a cloud in sight and she heard the rushing of the ocean. If her friends hadn't shown, she would have taken a dip in the blue water before beginning her day. But it seemed like, there was no rest for the weary.
"In a way, he did make it worse, but he pushed me to finally break loose from the chains Mike had me in." She turned to Lauren and Alice. "I guess, I should thank him for that," she said wistfully.
The three of them exchanged glances, feeling the pain Isabella was experiencing. She had survived it, though. Most of her physical bruises had healed, but the emotional and mental scars Mike had inflicted would take more time.
Not to mention, Edward's imprint on her heart.
Could she face him again, knowing what she now knew?
God, her heart ached thinking about it.
She looked out the back doors to the blue water. "I'm done with all this heavy talk. What about going for a swim?"
"Hell yeah," Alice piped up, quickly depositing her mug in the sink and sprinting out the back door.
Lauren rose slower, draining the last of her coffee. Isabella knew she had more to say and she waited patiently while Lauren gathered her thoughts.
"I can't stay for the swim; I have to pick up the boys from daycare."
Isabella nodded, knowing she wasn't finished.
"Alice needs to talk to Jasper. I know what he did wasn't right, but it wasn't like what Edward did to you. Their relationship is strong and has been through a lot more than this. She can't just throw it away. Especially not now. They're engaged."
Isabella watched Alice remove her clothes through the window, leaving her in only her pink boy shorts and black bra.
"Maybe, but it's her choice," Isabella said slowly. "And I think she will miss him after a few days without him."
Lauren laughed. "I hope so, and knowing Jasper the way I do, he won't rest until she's back in his arms. He loves her too damn much."
With a fierce hug and promise to get together soon, Isabella bid Lauren goodbye and joined Alice in the ocean. The two friends laughed and played in the water until Isabella's stomach started to growl.
She slung her arm around Alice as they made their way back to the house. "Thanks for this," Isabella motioned to the water behind them. "I needed to relax."
Alice nodded and gripped Isabella's waist, wiping water from her chin. They had forgotten to bring towels. "Yeah, me too." She bit her lip. "Would it be okay if I stayed with you for a couple of nights? I had moved in with Jasper about a month ago, but I'm not sure I can go back there now. At least, not yet."
"Sure. I would love the company," Isabella encouraged, heading into the house and handing a towel to Alice.
-T-T-T-
Jasper had been persistent, but Alice was standing strong, not answering his calls and deleting his voicemails. Isabella saw the look of longing and sadness that passed over Alice's features every time the phone chimed with Jasper's call or message.
She missed him.
On the third day, Isabella gathered enough courage to talk to her friend about it. They were lounging on the sofa, a bowl of popcorn between them, and A Walk to Remember was playing on the flat screen; Alice's favorite movie.
"Kick his ass," she screamed, shaking her buttered finger at the screen.
Isabella bit her lip. "Ali?"
"Hmm?" Alice answered absentmindedly, her eyes on the screen.
"How long …" she sighed, gathering more courage. "How long are you going to ignore Jasper?"
Her handful of popcorn paused halfway to her mouth, her head swiveling to meet Isabella's watchful eyes. "You want me to leave?"
"What?" Isabella asked incredulously. She shook her head, "No. No. That's not it. It's just … well …"
Fuck, how could she broach this subject without sounding like a horrible friend? Without sounding condescending?
"Well, what?" Alice asked, pressing pause on the remote. Shane West froze on the screen, his cocky smirk in place.
Swallowing nervously, Isabella tried again. "I see the way you look at your phone when he calls. You miss him. So, why don't you just go talk to him?"
Alice placed the bowl on the coffee table and faced Isabella, sitting cross-legged on the couch. "And ignore what he did?"
"No," Isabella shook her head. "That's not…" She sighed. "I'm just saying talk to him. Listen to him. Don't you think he deserves that?"
God, she sounded so hypocritical.
She reassured herself that what she had with Edward was just a fling. She was the one who had become emotionally attached. Now she had to suffer the consequences.
She owed him nothing.
He owed her no explanation.
He had done his job.
Her breath shuttered thinking about the man that had the potential to own her heart more than Mike ever had. She sure had a way of picking the man she let into her life.
Alice licked at the butter on her fingers, her gaze far away, mulling over what Isabella had said. Wiping her hand on the napkin, she turned to Isabella, her eyes sad. "I do miss him."
She swallowed heavily. "How can I look past this? Tell me, Bella. He knew and still let Edward do that to you. How can I trust him?"
Heavy tears streamed down her cheeks and she wiped them away angrily. Isabella wiped at her own tears and drew Alice close to her, her spiky hair tickling her cheek.
"Maybe he did tell Edward. Maybe he wanted to tell you but figured it was all over now. That it was the past."
Isabella drew back and brushed the tears from Alice's cheeks. "Edward made his bed and he has to lie in it, just like I do. Don't let my fucked up situation stop you from being happy."
Alice sniffed, wiping at her nose. "You're making excuses for him."
Isabella nodded, smiling softly. "I am, but maybe it will get you to talk to him. You are engaged to that man, for Pete's sake! That has to count for something."
Giggling, Alice brushed her hands down her pajama-clad thighs. "I am engaged, aren't I?" She smiled down at her ring. "God, this all feels so surreal. A month ago, I was over the moon with wedding planning and now I am ready to throw it away? What's that say about me? What if we had been married, would I have been willing to throw it away just as quickly? God, what must Jasper think of me? I would make a horrible wife at this rate. Throw in the towel when things get a little sticky." She shuddered at the thought.
"I have to talk to him." Alice declared, rising to her feet. She swayed and sat back down. "Whoa, head rush."
Isabella laughed, knowing that Alice and Jasper would be okay. The following morning, Alice gathered enough courage to call Jasper and set up a time to meet.
At least, Alice hadn't brought up Edward again, leaving Isabella to figure it out on her own.
-T-T-T-
A few days later, Isabella was ready to get her own car. That was today's journey. She had enough money in her savings for a car that is reasonably priced. She smiled at the thought of having something permanent. Next on her list was looking for ajob and then her own place.
Preferably before the New Year.
Locking the door to the house, she turned and gasped. "Edward."
He looked worn; dark circles under his eyes, his hair in disarray, looking as if he had run his hands through it a million times in frustration. He froze, his eyes locked on hers. Her heart hammered in her chest as she tried to stop her mind from thinking about those few days spent with him.
He had taken her by surprise.
Mere seconds had passed before she gathered her wits. "What are you doing here?"
She tried to sound civil, but her tone had a bite to it.
He flinched, hearing the distaste.
Good, she thought, standing up a little straighter.
"I… I needed to talk to you." His voice was raspy as if he was just overcoming the flu or hadn't slept in days.
"How did you find me?" She asked, rather than acknowledging his request.
His smile was small; timid. "Your mother's address is on file. Jasper installed the security system in this house just over a year ago."
Her eyes narrowed. "Great. Now you can remove it from your file and remove yourself from this property while you're at it. I have nothing to say to you."
She stepped around him, but his hand shot out and gently took her arm. "Bella, please."
The touch of his skin on hers was overwhelming, sending warmth through her veins and resurrecting those damn memories of him looming over her. His body moving in hers. His soft lips and those tender touches she craved when her nights got lonely.
"Edward, please. You need to leave. There's nothing to talk about. You did your job. Let's just forget about it, okay?" Her voice was small and she hated her own words as they spewed from her lips.
"Okay," he whispered close to her ear. "I will leave, but I will not forget about it. I did you wrong and I want … need to make it right," he whispered with determination, his eyes fierce.
Edward released her and stepped back, his gaze pleading with hers once more before he turned and walked down the small paved driveway to his car, his hands shoved into his pockets. His shoulders slumped forward and he looked defeated, broken.
Isabella bit her lip to stop it from trembling. The urge to call after him was strong. If only she could rewind the past few months and have left Mike. She would have been a free woman when she had met Edward and they could have a happy life now.
She shook her head. Thinking about the what-ifs won't change a damn fucking thing.
Watching him drive away from her in her rear-view mirror, she braced herself on the steering wheel, willing herself not to cry … again.
Her conversation with Alice flitted through her mind. Hadn't she urged Alice to talk to Jasper? Why couldn't she do the same when it came to Edward?
Maybe she should listen to him. Maybe it would give her closure.
At a red light, she shook her head, the devastated look on his face as he walked down the driveway made her chest ache.
-T-T-T-
Pulling into the used car lot, she killed the engine and took a few deep breaths. Seeing Edward again had thrown her. Today was supposed to be a good day; a happy day. She hated the fact that he dredged up so many memories and reminders of what she tried to leave behind.
With her chin raised up high and her smile firmly in place, she waltzed into the showroom, ready to make her first independent purchase. In their marriage, Mike always had done the big item purchases, deciding where the money was spent. He had bought her the BMW in their second year of marriage and the horse that had never been ridden in his stable. She loved horses; the powerful and majestic look of them but was deathly afraid of riding one.
"Hello. Welcome to Harry's Car Sales. My name is Jared. Can I help you find anything?"
Jared was a tall, somewhat chubby man. He was dark-skinned with jet-black hair slicked back with just a little, too much gel. He reminded Isabella of Ross from the TV show Friends.
"Hi," she took his hand and shook it. "I am looking to buy that Honda Civic." She pointed out the window to the red car, having done research the previous night.
"Excellent choice," he crooned, walking towards the doors. "Would you like to take it for a test drive? See how it handles?"
She hadn't thought of that. "Sure," she answered somewhat hesitantly.
They drove through the city while Jared explained all the necessary details about the vehicle. Truthfully, Isabella didn't know half of the things he was mentioning, but she liked the car.
Once back at the car lot, Jared smiled at her. "So, what do you think?"
She smiled back ecstatically. "I think I love it. I'll take it."
"Great," He clapped his hands together. "Let me grab my mechanic and he can give it a once over before you sign the papers."
Isabella was looking through the papers when she heard a familiar voice. "Bella?"
Whirling around, she came face to face with a grease-covered Jake. "Jake. Hey. Wow. You're here."
His big toothy grin caused her to smile in return. "Yeah. Yeah, I am. How are you?"
"I'm doing well," she answered. "You moved here?"
He nodded slightly, letting his eyes roam over her body. "I did. For now."
"You two know each other?" Jared asked, pointing between the pair and they nodded. "Small world," he mused.
"Bella and I met on the plane just a few weeks ago. She let me borrow her shoulder," Jake answered.
"For crying?" Jared asked teasingly.
Jake flung his grease rag at Jared, who dodged it skillfully, laughing. "I was sleeping," Jake defended himself.
Isabella laughed, loving the easy banter. "He really was sleeping," she said, defending Jake.
Jared smiled at her. "I believe you. This lug would sleep all day if I'd let him."
Jake scowled while Jared and Isabella laughed.
She was just about to leave when Jake came running out of the shop. "Bella. Wait!"
"Jake. Hey. What's up?"
He smiled brightly and leaned on the hood of her car. "What are you doing later?"
Was she giving off some kind of a vibe?
Do I have 'Single Woman' written on my forehead?
"Probably browsing through the classifieds. Why?"
His thick brows furrowed. "Are you looking for a job?"
"No, I read those just for fun," she teased, laughing when he groaned. "Yes, I'm looking for a job."
"There's this accounting firm that's looking for a new accountant. Harry is a client of theirs and Jared's sister works in that office. Maybe he can talk to her." He paused, his hand gripping his grease rag, "Oh shit, unless that's not something that interests you."
Isabella's interest piqued. "That would be great. I have a degree in business so this would be right up my alley. Does his sister do the hiring?"
He looked at her quizzically. "I don't know, but I can ask him."
Jake was about to walk back inside to ask for the info when Jared walked through the doors, his phone to his ear.
"Hey J., is Angela in charge of hiring at Uley's Accounting? Bella is looking for a job."
Isabella's smile fell and her eyes widened.
Angela?
A/N: So... Edward showed up. He is making an effort, but... is he doing enough?
Alice agreed to talk to Jasper and that conversation is next. What will be Jasper's explanation?
Bella just can't seem to catch a break. Will it ever get easier for her? Will she listen to Edward? Should she, since Jasper and Alice are talking?
I'd love to hear yours thoughts, ladies. Thank you in advance.
A big thank you to the special ladies who have recc'd this story over Facebook, in their own stories and blogs. You are amazing. Thank you so much. I am honored. 3 3
As you already know, I'm very horrible at replying to reviews and I apologize. RL has been on the fast track the past few weeks and it probably won't slow down until after the New Year's. If I get time to write, I'm a happy woman. So please, don't feel discouraged if I don't reply to your lovely reviews. I read and cherish each and every one of them. Thank you so much, dear readers. You and your words are very special to me.
See you next Tuesday... xoxo