The Real Life Love

Dick's P.O.V

I know Jay has nightmares. We all do, but Jay's… Jay's seemed more. More pain, more terror, more screaming. They're not normal nightmares. And the saddest thing about it is that it's not just his imagination. For Jay, they're real, because they happened. He tries to hide it from me. Sometimes in the night I can hear him wake with gasp, then leave the bed, doing his best not to disturb me. I wish he'd talk to me. I understand that it must be hard to explain, but I thought if anyone, he'd confide in me.

Thankfully, over the months we've dated, his nightmares have been gradually getting less frequent. More often than not now, after dating for a year, he sleeps peacefully. But I knew that tonight wasn't going to be one of those nights.

It wasn't an easy patrol that night. In fact, it was terrifying. It was one of the few nights that we weren't patrolling together. Jay wasn't happy with me, was claiming that I was being too reckless over the commlink. Pot calling the kettle black, I know, but he wasn't listening to me. The shouting went on for a while. And then, silence. Out of nowhere. I'd been wishing for him to stop, but when the shouting did stop, all the silence did was scare me.

I was right to be scared. By the time we found him, Jason had been awake inside a dark cellar for thirty minutes. His panicked eyes when we got him out is something I'll never forget. He remained silent for the rest of the night, as I took him home and put him in bed.

We could all guess where his claustrophobia came from. Jay doesn't like talking about his death and resurrection, except for making dark jokes. The humour is a defence mechanism for him, when he doesn't want to lash out in anger. But I've managed to glean fragments about what actually happened from these jokes, even when they make me and the others wince. So we know that he remembers waking up in his coffin. Remembers digging his way out.

So yeah, it wasn't a surprise when I wake up to Jason's muffled screams. It sounds like he's choking, but there's nothing covering his mouth. I'm lying on my side, facing him with my arm wrapped over his waist as he lies on his back. Button wakes up, too, head lifting and tilting to the side as she lies by our feet. All of a sudden, Jay wakes, pitching forward into a sitting position with a strangled gasp. Button stands and carefully walks up between Jay's legs to lick at his face. Jay buries his fingers in her fur, head bending down, still gasping for air.

I sit up, noticing that Jay's eyes flick to me. Silently pulling him into a hug, my arms tight around him, I rub his back slowly. I half expect him to push me away. He doesn't. Instead, he clings to me tightly, head resting on my shoulder. Button, who's like me and will never pass up an opportunity for cuddles, wriggles her way across our laps.

"You're okay, love. I have you," I whisper into his ear, over and over again. Eventually, Jay calms, slipping back into sleep. Carefully, I lie down, Jay's head tucked under my chin. Sometimes, I do wish he'd talk to me more about what he experienced. But I know that I'm one of the few people (me, Alfred and occasionally Bruce) he'd ever let see him like this. And having him rest in my arms? Good enough for me.

The next morning, I'm woken with a gentle kiss. Smiling, I reach up to grip the back of his neck, tugging him closer to me. I can feel more than I can hear the low rumble of his chuckle.

"How are you feeling, baby?" I murmur against his lips. A risky question – he's likely to shut down – but I feel like I have to know. Surprisingly, he doesn't pull away. His smile does fade a touch, but he doesn't look angry at me. Progress.

"I'm fine, Pidge. Sorry for scaring you."

"Oh, Jay, don't worry about me. I just need to know you're okay. Last night was hard for you, I get it. I just wish you'd talk to me, not stubbornly repress it like a certain someone." Jay sighs, shifting back a little and running his hand through his hair. A nervous tick of his.

But then something in his face changes, a sudden decision made. His face becomes determined, and his eyes meet mine. The look in them is hard, steely. He looks like a man staring down the barrel of a gun but refusing to be cowed. Then he tells me everything. About his death, his resurrection, his years of training. I already had a basic knowledge of what happened, but hell, I wasn't prepared for this. That's how we spend our morning, talking through the years we were separated. I feel like we're closer than ever. I love being the one he can talk to about anything. I love him. And this all makes me realise that he's the one that I want to spend the rest of my life with.

…

Jay's P.O.V

Oh, this is fantastic. Probably the best fucking thing I've ever seen. I don't think I have enough words to describe how much I freaking love this. Grabbing my phone, I flick through my contacts until I find the number I'm looking for.

"Hey, Blondie bear, there's something you gotta see."

Steph and my friendship scares people sometimes. Which is fair enough, if I'm honest. We bonded over musicals and pranks. No one is safe from our team ups, except Alfred. She's the cool little sister that I've never had before, and I'll protect her to my last breath. Not that she really needs my protection, she's a badass in her own right. My other little sister, Cass, is a certified badass, too. But I will admit to scaring a few of the girls' dates away. Cass is always fondly exasperated with me when I do that. Steph thinks it's hilarious. "Why would I want to date someone who's intimidated by a big softie like Jay?" She'd say, with a bright, trilling laugh.

At least once a week, I'll come home from my morning run with Button to find Steph in my kitchen, waiting for breakfast. She's trouble, that girl, but I love her. Both Alfred and I are guilty of sneaking into her apartment to leave decent food. She's a student, she needs all the heathy meals she can get. Sometimes I think she sneaks into Dick and my apartment to steal fruit. Apparently fruit is low priority with a student's budget.

It's our love of musicals that led me to Team Starkid, and from that, Holy Musical B man. Which is frankly, the best thing ever created, and Steph needed to see it immediately. So it didn't surprise me the next day, I walk into the manor and am greeted with a big Steph hug. Dick, beside me, instantly joins in, though he doesn't know what the hug's for. He just likes hugs.

"Jay, have I told you recently that I love you?"

"Only every day, Blondie. Wanna go torture Bruce?"

"Oh, dear sweet Jay. Why else would I be here?"

Thus lead to an addition to the glorious family tradition of messing with Bruce. If you haven't Holy Musical B man, you should. Really. Go do it now. It's hilarious. There are many, many inconsistencies with characters, but that's what makes it fantastic. Just imagining Bruce crying because he has no friends, priceless. And then having a song about it, oh, heaven.

It's a Saturday, so we both know were Bruce is. Quietly letting ourselves in to the Batcave, we start slow. I've got my guitar, softly plucking a few notes. Steph sings gently, so Bruce doesn't immediately growl at us, and tries to ignore us first.

"Poor master Bruce, poor Mister Wayne. Lonely caboose on a one car train.
And it pains me to watch you amble along this track of loneliness I laid down for you.
I remember that horrible night, the night you were split in two and I swore I'd protect you. And I haven't.
So I built a wall all round you, but the wall was too tall and it blocked out all of the birds and the sun."

Steph's voice is loud now, echoing through the cave. Bruce is stiff in his chair, still trying his absolute best to pretend we're not there. But I can see that his fingers on the keys have slowed and are using far more force than actually necessary. It's all I can do not to laugh. Tim's here too, staring at us in shock, but covering his mouth with his hand. He's probably doing his best not to laugh, too, but I don't think he's actually seen the musical. It's Alfred that sings the song originally, but there's no way that we'd convince him to sing this to Bruce. No matter his love for theatre. He'd still enjoy watching the musical. We should watch it together.

"I tried to raise you right, I tried to raise you proper. I tried to be a mentor and a friend, and a mama and a papa, too.
And insulate you from any outside source of fright. And make bloody certain you'll never see another dark, sad, lonely night."

Now it's my time to shine. We're right behind his chair now, and I can hear the quiet chuckles of Dick and Cass behind us. Steph's leaning over Bruce's shoulder, mischievous glint in her cornflower eyes. Bruce refuses to look at her.

"When I look at my life, I see that somethings not right. Like a 1000 percent," I belt out, still gently strumming my guitar.

"And I wonder what it is, how it is that it's always just me here crying alone at the end of the night, 10 000 percent."

And then he cracks. "Jason, Stephanie, enough! What's the meaning of this?" Steph and I stop, grinning at each other.

"You mean you don't know?" Steph plays at being shocked, hand coming to rest over her heart. "Bruce, I thought you were always so on top of culture."

"Alfred would be so disappointed with you, Bruce," I add, tutting disapprovingly. "He works so hard to make sure you stay current. Especially since you're the star of this musical!"

"What on earth are you talking about?"

"Ah well, since you asked so nicely," I say, typing on the Batcomputer to pull up the appropriate youtube playlist."

From there, we had an impromptu family movie night, down in the Batcave. Everyone was there, sitting on cushions on the floor, except for Bruce who stayed on the chair. Many, many laughs were had. Even Alfred chuckled at his own portrayal. Bruce was the only one not laughing, his face red and mortified. Which only made it better, I think. Dick was embarrassed, too, "I can feel my transformation beginning!" But he took it with more grace, laughing about it with us. Bruce and Dick did have to endure many renditions of the Dynamic Duet, but it's not my fault that it's hilarious. We also took to calling Bruce Pterodactyl-Man for a while. And it's fair to say many fantastic quotes came out of it. It also made it hard to take Two-Face seriously ever again.

I don't think Bruce has forgiven me yet. But I also think he's secretly pleased we're bonding, even if it's at his expense. And I know he enjoyed To Be a Man, where he beat the shit out of Superman after having the shit beat out of him.

All in all, it was a good day.

…

Katy's note: Hey guys! Sorry it's been so long! And sorry this chapter's a bit of a mess and nothing really happens, but hey, it's kind of fluffy? Bat-bonding, whoo! Hopefully you won't have to wait so long for the next one! And seriously, watch Holy Musical B man, it's so funny.

Katy.