Hello, everyone! I'VE FINALLY DECIDED TO UPDATE! I know that it's been a little over a month since I've last updated...I think it's been...what, a month and six days? *sighs* Sorry about that-school's been driving me up the wall, not to mention that I've been slowly getting obsessed with other shows...*guilty smile* I still love the Clone Wars, though...plus, writing song fics can be so tedious!

Not that I love writing them...it's just a harder sometimes. *winces*

Anyways, a warning-tons of monologue in this chapter, so sorry about that. Again, my song!fic skills are a bit rusty from lack of practice. Please review, though!

Song 11. Innocent

Padmé Admidala—

I guess you really did it this time. Left yourself on a war path, lost your balance on a tight rope and lost your mind trying to get it back.

As the ship flew back to Coruscant, I couldn't help but to yearn to look back and take a glimpse at Rush, even though he wasn't there. I knew he wasn't there.

"You okay?" Anakin asked me quietly as we landed. "You look tired."

"I am." I replied sadly, resting my head on his shoulder. "I'm shocked, too…"

Anakin's face hardened slightly but instead, he squeezed my hand. "I can see why." He said gently. "But what he did was wrong. He doesn't deserve you."

I nodded silently, but Anakin's words didn't help the empty feeling in my stomach. Even though I was loyal to my husband, I couldn't help but to feel remorse and saddened over the loss of a very good friend—a friend who I had once been romantically interested with.

I wanted to shudder at the thought—I really did. As a senator, I shouldn't feel sympathy towards traitors of the Republic.

Oh, but it's not that easy—after all, I had several friends who sided with the Separatists. It was different with Rush, though.

No, not Rush. He's Clovis now, I chided to myself. Address him by his last name as though you were never with him in the first place.

"Padmé?" Anakin asked, nudging my shoulder. "Padmé, it's time to go."

I blinked and turned to look at him. Anakin's eyes were confused and I stood up with a smile. "Of course," I replied. "Let's go."

Wasn't it easier in the picnic days? Always a bigger bed to crawl into. Wasn't it beautiful when you believed in everything and everybody believed in you…

The second I was in my apartment, I had ducked into my bedroom to change out of the formal gown that I had been wearing for most of the night. I shrugged it off and neatly put on my dressing gown before heading back out.

Anakin was stretched out on the bed, looking at me with a concerned pair of eyes. "I'm allowed to stay here," he said to my questioning look.

"By allowed, you mean that you're sneaking off, right?" I asked, slipping under the covers.

"Eh…that, too." Anakin grinned, lifting the covers so he could wiggle underneath.

I managed a small smile and looked up at the ceiling. I closed my eyes and tried to drift to sleep but instead kept seeing Rush's stricken face in my mind.

I bit down on my lip and rolled over on my side so Anakin couldn't see my face. I wondered what Rush was doing at this moment—it was painful to think about what possible punishments he would receive for his betrayal.

It was such a shame, too…he was always looked up to, always considered to be an honorable man with good morals and never had any scandals besides this one.

It's alright, just wait and see. Your string of lights are still bright to me, oh, who you are is not what you did. You're still an innocent.

I allowed my breath to come out evenly and wrapped my arms around my waist, still looking at the wall rather than Anakin's face. I don't care what other people would say about Rush—I kept seeing the same, friendly face that I fell in love with all those years ago.

Rush will turn around—he's a smart man, and he's good-hearted. Surely, he won't allow the power to go to his head and get into even bigger trouble. He can go back to normal.

He will.

My hope was overwhelmingly great and a small sob choked out of my mouth before I could stop myself.

"Padmé?" Anakin whispered. I felt him propping himself on the elbows and looking down at me. "Padmé, what's wrong? Are you hurt somewhere?"

Yes, Ani, I'm hurt. Very, very hurt. I wanted to say but instead, I shook my head, wiping angrily at my eyes. "It's nothing," I murmured back, placing a hand on his arm. "Go to sleep."

Anakin watched me doubtfully. "Your emotions are telling me otherwise. Tell me what's wrong." He said quietly.

"I'm just cranky, I think. Long day, after all." I fibbed, positioning myself away from Anakin once more. "Don't worry about me."

Did some things you can't speak of. But at night, you live it all again. You wouldn't be shattered on the floor now, if only you had seen what you know then.

I felt Anakin's eyes boring holes into my back but didn't bother to acknowledge.

Rush. If he had only known how bad the things he were doing before, he would have never decided to proceed with his plans, anyways.

That couldn't happen, though, could it?

Wasn't it easier in your firefly catching days? When everything out of reach, someone bigger brought down to you. Wasn't it beautiful? Running wild 'till you fell asleep, before the monsters caught up to you.

I sighed. Rush could have lived a happy life—or at least, a life away from the monsters who decided to manipulate him into joining them.

So happy, so full of life—and now it's all gone.

I tucked the blankets tighter around me and traced the sheets with a finger. Everything he did, everything he said always seemed wise and warm hearted to me until now. Why did he have to fall so hard?

It's alright, just wait and see. Your string of lights are still bright to me, oh, who you are is not what you did. You're still an innocent. It's okay, life is a tough crowd, thirty two and still growing up now. Who you are is not what you did. You're still an innocent.

Life is hard, no doubt about it. If criminals can work up their way to the top just with a change of heart, then why can't Rush?

He wasn't a criminal—he was much greater than that. I still knew the real Rush Clovis, no matter what everyone else said and he can turn his life around.

No one can expect him to go through his own life without being caught in a trap, after all.

Time turns flames to embers, you'll have new Septembers, every one of us is messed up, too. Minds change like the weather, I hope you remember that today is never too late to be brand new.

My gaze turned towards the ceiling and I allowed my eyes to close. Tomorrow will be a better day—life always granted people another chance.

It's alright, just wait and see. Your string of lights are still bright to me, oh, who you are is not what you did. You're still an innocent. It's okay, life is a tough crowd, thirty two and still growing up now. Who you are is not what you did. You're still an innocent.

Lost your balance on a tight rope…never too late to get it back.

I smiled sadly to myself. One can hope for the best.