Chapter 15

Here's another chapter.

I hope you like it! Reviews, please Let me know what you think of this.

Jane, Maura and a sponge…let's see what happens…

Jane arrived at the hospital and got to Maura's room without a problem. It was almost midday.

She saw doctor Lewis in the corridor and asked her if there hadn't been any changes.

"Oh, Jane, you're already here. Good. No changes. Everything looks good. She's still sleeping soundly. I'll call the nurse for you so she can bring you what you need to wash Maura." Said the doctor, walking away.

Washing Maura. An almost naked Maura…she was anticipating and dreading that moment. She was sure it was going to be uncomfortable but also intimate and meaningful for her, even though Maura wasn't going to feel anything. Would she ever have the chance to touch Maura's naked body again? Would a conscious Maura allow Jane to be this near, this intimate with her again?

She could only pray.

She entered the room and Maura was peacefully asleep. She put the bags in the small wardrobe in front of the bed and sat down on the chair next to the M.E. After a little hesitation Jane took Maura's hand in her, careful not to touch the tube coming from her arm. She looked at Maura and gently started caressing her red hair and her cheeks.

"Hey sweety" she whispered: "Didn't you overslept a little today? I hope you wake up soon. I want to hear your voice and look into your beautiful eyes. I miss you so much, you know. But you need your rest to get better. Now the nurse will bring the things we need to get you all nice and clean. I will wash you. Humor me but I don't want the nurse to touch you. I guess I am jealous…I hope you don't mind…well, maybe you do mind. Probably you hate me for what I did to you. You should…but…"

As Jane was finishing her sentence there was knock at the door and the nurse walked in. Jane quickly whispered in Maura's ear:" I love you" and then focused her attention on the black woman in the room.

"Detective…these are the things you need to wash your fianceè..." said the nurse cheerfully, approching Jane. She was maybe fifty. She had short brown hair and brown eyes. They were kind and compassionate.

"She's not…" tried Jane to explain. She wanted to clarify her position and the nature of her relationship with Maura at that moment, but the other woman didn't gave her the time. And Jane didn't try again to correct her. She didn't want to. There would be time for explanations later, if necessary. Fianceè. It was a legitimate assumption. She found herself wishing it was more than just an assumption.

The nurse began to explain with a loud, reassuring voice: "I brought you some shower gel, a sponge and some towels in case you need them. There should be a basin in the bathroom. You can fill it with warm water. Please, try not to get her bandages too wet. Ok? If you need me, don't hesitate to call me. Just push the red button there. I'm Sarah." Concluded the nurse with a friendly smile. Jane found the woman kindhearted and attentive. She liked her.

"Thanks Sarah. I'm Jane" smiled her.

The two women shook their hands and Sarah said: "You know, she's very lucky to be alive; it was a bad injury. And she's very lucky to have you here with her. She's going to need your support."

"I'm the lucky one" said Jane with a smile.

"You two are so sweet. Ok…I'm out of here. I'll give you some privacy. Call me if you need help. I'll be at the nurse station." Said Sarah walking to the door.

"Oh…I forgot…you can put some underwear on her. She won't be comfortable waking up commando."

"Thanks Sarah. I will. See you later."

The door closed and Jane took a deep breath. It was just the two of them now.

"Well…she seems to be ok. I like her. She thinks I'm your fianceè so I like her more. " said Jane with a chuckle. The detective looked at the basin and the sponge. She caressed Maura's cheek again with a slightly trembling hand. She bent down, kissed Maura on the forehead and said:" Ok, sweety. Time to get clean. I'll go and fill the basin. It's going to be tricky. I bet the floor and the sheets will be soaked when we are finished here." She joked. She just wanted to ease the tension building in the room.

A minute later the detective was back with the basin full of warm water. She put it on the chair and started talking to Maura again while performing her tasks: "Ok…the water is nice and warm. I hope you'll like it. Now we need a few drops of that scented shower gel of yours. I'll confess you...I love it. You always smell like heaven."

She took the sponge in her hands. It was soft. She put it in the water to soak and looked at Maura again. She was going to start with her face. She took the sponge in her trembling hand and squeezed it. Then gently eased it on Maura's face.

"Sweety, now I'm going to wash your face with this nice sponge. It seems soft." She bathed her face and never stopped talking to Maura like she was there, awake and partecipating: " You know…you really are beautiful…I've been so foolish. I've lost so much time. I just chicken out I guess. I should have told you how beautiful you are. Inside and out. I look at you and I fall in love with you a little bit more every day. I should have told you all this before. Now it's easy…you can't hear me. But now it can be too late. You probably don't want aything to do with me anymore."

She washed Maura's face and neck and then took a towel to dry her pale skin with infinite care.

She throw the sponge in the basin again and grasped the hem of the sheet covering Maura between her fingers, carefully lowering it a bit and uncovering Maura's chest. "Ok sweety, I lowered the sheet so I can wash your chest. You're naked underneath this sheet. I'm sorry…but don't worry, I won't peek." Said Jane with a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood with a silly joke. It was so typical of her.

She grasped the sponge, squeezed it and started to caress Maura's body was beautiful. Her full, voluptuous breasts, her flat but feminine stomach…She closed her eyes for a second and then reopened them, ready to complete her job. There was nothing sexual in her exploration of the doctor's body now. She was committing every piece of skin to her memory. She was worshipping every curve of it. She just wanted to convey through her touch how much she loved the woman under her fingertips. It was highly erotic and achingly sweet at the same time.

"I hope you don't mind me doing this. Me seeing you like this. I just wanted you to feel at ease and I thought that maybe if it was me washing you, you would be more comfortable with this all situation. You know…it appears to be confession time so why not tell you everything. As I said before it's easy now…you are asleep."

Jane took a deep breath while brushing Maura's skin with the sponge, then went on: "I dreamed about you, you know? I still do. I dreamed about touching you. About caressing you, about kissing you and about making love to you so many times. I've never had the gut to tell you or to show you how much I loved you. I love you. I still do. So much. I wish I were more like you. More open, more uncensored. I wasted so much time." Jane sighed and sat down throwing the sponge in the basin, an act of frustration and sorrow.

Jane put her head in her hands and whispered: "God Maura…I pray God you don't hate me, I pray you can forgive me for hurting you so much. I pray it's not too late. I need you so much. I want you in every possible way. I hope it's not to late for us, Maura."

She sighed again and fought hard to keep the tears at bay. She took a few second and a few deep breaths to calm herself and then resumed her job. She felt on a rollercoaster of emotions…she felt out of control. It was like she was declaiming a weird, rambling monologue. She needed to focus and calm herself. She used to go to Maura to calm down and recollect. Maura always helped her to put things in prospective. With a touch, a look, a simple word, Maura was able to reassure and give strenght to the rough but sensitive detective. The doctor was her anchor. Now she couldn't count on her support. She needed to be Maura's support.

She took the towel and delicately dried Maura's chest and stomach.

"I can't wash you back sweety, I don't want to hurt you. We'll wash it another day." Jane looked at Maura, deciding how to proceed.

"Now I'm going to wash your legs, ok?"

She moved the sheets away from her right leg, careful not to expose Maura.

She took her sponge once again and started her journey from Maura's thigh to her foot and back.

"I've always dreamed of caressing these legs of yours. They're so minute, so slim and yet so strong. You can dance on your tiptoes, like a butterfly and you can run a marathon. You're so full of surprise. You're so unique. And I fell so lucky to have you in my life Maura. I'm blessed because I had the privilege to meet you. You honoured me. You chose me as your best friend."

Jane quickly dried her right leg and started bathing her left one.

"I guess I didn't do a great job of it. I hurt you so many times. I had sworn to myself I would have protected you. And I failed. I betrayed your trust. I hurt you. You've got scars to prove it. Some of them are on your body." She was slightly brushing Maura's scar now. The one from their little adventure with Sen Say Matta. She kept talking in a low, raspy voice: "New ones will appear…from last night. I should have been there with you. If I hadn't been so coward we could have been together, in bed, last night. And you would have been safe. In my arms."

Jane finished with the doctor's left leg and covered her. She put the sponge in the basin and sat down for a second, still thinking about what she was saying seconds before: "Are you ever going to be in my arms again, Maura?" she breathed in Maura's ear. Was she really waiting, hoping for a reply?

Her question fell unanswered. Maura was still asleep. She kissed her forehead again.

She needed to finish washing her. The water was going to turn cold soon. Jane took a breath and stood up again.

"Sweety, we're almost finished for today. I'm sorry, but I need to wash you between your legs, too, so I can put a pair of fancy, God knows how expensive , designer panties on you"

She slowly pulled the sheet down again and exposed Maura's hips and her red haired centre. She didn't want to look. She didn't want to violate Maura.

Jane took the sponge in her quivering hand and tenderly brushed her hips with the wet soapy sponge.

She soaked the sponge again and lovingly, delicately started to cleanse Maura's sex. She put the sponge in the basin and, for the last time, dried Maura's body. She quickly put a pair of black panties on her. She couldn't refrain from gently brushing Maura's legs with her fingers while doing it. She covered the doctor again. She sat down, taking the M.E. hand in hers and kissing its back tenderly. She was silent for a minute or two, collecting her thoughts and then, like an explosion, she broke down and cried again.

"I'm sorry... I love you Maura. If you will forgive me, if you'll give me, us, a chance I promise you that the next time I'll touch your body it will be while I'm making love to you." She spoke softly, between sobs, easing her head on Maura's left shoulder.

"Are you going to keep your promise?"