A/N: I don't own anything, especially the lyrics I use. (Ugh, Bella's POV, bane of my existence, but must happen.) This is the chapter that I have been talking about.
Please read the author's note at the end. It's Important and it may answer some of your questions.

Chapter 11 – All the Same

Bella's POV

Fire coursed through my veins and licked at my neck. But I couldn't make a sound, I couldn't scream out like my reflexes wanted to. Edward was doing this for me against his will. I couldn't let him see how much it actually hurt me.

The adjustment had been tough, but we have worked through it. When I first awoke after three days of excruciating pain, I was disorientated by all the senses and thoughts swirling in my head. Edward, Carlisle, and Esme have been so helpful. I felt bad for Carlisle. He had to take care of three newborns basically. But, he says it's easier than he expected, since I've had prior knowledge of the change.

Edward has been slowly getting used to the idea. He still believes he's killed me, but I try to teach him otherwise, show him how good this is for us by…um…actions when we are alone…

We've stayed in this town for another year. Carlisle deemed it safe. But Edward…he doesn't seem to like it here. At least…he's acting very strange…

I stared into those red eyes, disbelievingly. "Edward, what happened?" I raised my hands up slowly and cupped his face gently.

He gripped my wrists tightly and pulled them away. Closing his eyes and breathing deeply he broke my heart. "Bella," he said. His eyes were still closed. "I'm leaving."

I stopped breathing, not that it was necessary. "You're what?" I asked. My voice raised two octaves in my shock. Leaving? How could he be leaving? How could he do this to Carlisle and Esme? To me?

Everything he worked for and how he's just throwing it all away. He's killing humans!

"Bella…this life…it's just not working for me." His eyes opened finally, but I looked away. I couldn't look in those blood red eyes anymore. He's never looked more frightening.

"You're leaving me?" I asked softly. If crying was possible for me, I knew I would be sobbing right now.

This time he cupped my face, forcing me to look him in the eyes. "Come with me Bella," Edward said. Hope was shining in his bright red eyes. This time I looked away from them. "I have a plan."

I ripped myself from his hands. "A plan?" I yelled. Edward flinched. "A plan to what? Kill people? Destroy lives? How do you have a plan to do that? That's despicable, monstrous!"

Edward looked down at his shoes. "What does it matter, Bella? We are monsters."

I shook my head. "No, Edward. What we are are people dealt a difficult hand, but we are overcoming it." I glared murderously at him. "What you did…that was monstrous."

He grimaced. "It's what we are Bella." He avoided my gaze again and closed his eyes. "I'm still leaving."

Venom boiled under my skin. I couldn't hold it in anymore. "Fine!" I exploded, screaming. "Leave then! Leave me and your family. Leave everyone that ever cared for you and loved you!"

Edward didn't look at me. He just turned around, grabbed his bag off the bed and headed out of our bedroom door. I followed behind him, screaming silently to myself not to let him go, but I couldn't bring make my mouth obey my brain.

Carlisle and Esme were at the bottom of the staircase, looking sadly up at us. Carlisle's eyes held guilt and even looked ashamed when he gazed up at Edward. Edward ignored them and brushed past to the front door without saying a word. Esme let out a small sob and clutched Carlisle, no doubt both of them heard our entire conversation…fight.

A lump formed in my throat. Fight. Edward and I haven't fought since he wanted to go to war, and technically when I wanted to be changed. I let out a tiny sob. Edward flinched and paused in the doorway. I knew I had to say it now or I would never get another chance.

"Edward," I sobbed dryly. "I'll take you for who you are and I love you. It's all the same, whatever path you choose."

He didn't say anything. I could tell he was still, unnecessarily, breathing heavily from our fight. Edward turned around and stared at me with determined eyes. He took four fast, huge strides and dropped his bag. Taking my face in his hands again he pressed his lips to mine hard. He moved them against mine with such urgency. I threw myself into the kiss, wrapping my arms around his neck and clinging to him desperately.

All too soon the kiss ended. Edward unwrapped my arms from around him. And then he was gone, bag in hand, and racing impossibly fast through the trees. Away from us.

I collapsed against the doorframe and sobbed, tearlessly and uncontrollably.

Hours slid away and days went by, but still Edward never showed. I would sit by the window every day just waiting and hoping for him to come home. Esme was worried at first when I never moved from the couch, nor tore my eyes away from the trees he left through, but soon she joined me. Then it was Carlisle's turn to worry about us. We couldn't move, I couldn't move. And wouldn't, not until I saw Edward's face again. I needed him.

But, I waited patiently. I knew he would come back soon. He had to be hurting just as much as I was.

One day, Carlisle finally convinced us to go hunting. Esme and I grudgingly got up from our seats by the window and went outside to the forest. We promised each other we wouldn't hunt far.

I stopped just outside the tree line. Swallowing whatever feelings were erupting in me I stepped through the same two trees Edward did and ran off to hunt.

Just after finishing my fifth deer and hiding the carcass by a wolf's den with the others, I caught a different scent. It was familiar, sweet, and heady. My face split into a huge smile and feelings of joy erupted in my stomach like butterflies. I spun around quickly and sprinted, following the scent carefully.

I stepped through a small clearing and slowed to a stop. Edward's head snapped to me and I smiled hesitantly. A smile slowly spread across his as well. His eyes were still red, but I cared not a tick. He came back and that's all that mattered.

I rushed into his open arms and squealed so unlike me. I felt Edward's body shaking with laughter and squeeze me closer. Her bent his head down and buried his face in my hair, breathing deeply.

"I've missed you," he murmured.

I smiled and breathed in his sweet scent as well. "I know," I whispered. "Me too."

We rocked in each other's arms, completely at peace.

It was too perfect and so, true to my life, I knew it wasn't going to last. My body grew tense and in response I felt Edward's body stiffen under my grasp. I pulled back and he looked at me curiously, guilty. Esme burst through the trees into the clearing. She has caught onto his scent too then. She flinched from his red eyes and in response to whatever she thought in her head, he looked away.

I stepped farther away from him. He looked pleadingly at me. "Bella," he whispered.

I shook my head and cut him off. "Go ahead. Say it." I whispered. "You're leaving! Fine. You'll just come back running." I shook my head and grabbed Esme's hand. "Edward," Esme said. He didn't say anything he just looked down and nodded.

"It's all the same," I whispered. We turned around to run home. I glanced back one more time to look at him. Edward's eyes were filled with love looking into mine and I knew I looked the same. But I also knew he wasn't staying.

Wrong or right, black or white. If I close my eyes, it's all the same.

Months passed and our lives went on. Esme and I made an unspoken agreement to not tell Carlisle of our run in with Edward. I had showered quickly to lose his scent. That was the hardest part. I stood just outside the shower, inhaling the air around me just to take it in as much as I could before I forced myself under the water.

It was hard and painful for all of us.

Esme and me especially, but I couldn't even fathom what it did to Carlisle. Edward had been the son he always wanted and now that son had betrayed him.

It had only been months since our last meeting, but it felt like years.

I looked up at Carlisle and Esme as they walked into our-my- room. If they could cry I'm sure they would have been. I instantly became worried. What could make them look like this? what if something happened to—No!

"What happened?" I demanded urgently.

Carlisle shook his head calmly. "Nothing happened, Bella. But, we do need to tell you something."

I relaxed only slightly.

"What is it?" I asked impatiently.

Carlisle sighed. "It's time we moved on from this town."

"No," I said instantly. "We have to wait. We must!" We couldn't leave. How would Edward find us?

"I'm sorry Bella. We are already pushing it." Carlisle came and sat next to me while Esme stood off to the side silently. I assume the fight was out of her. She could not possibly agree to this!

"Only a few more months, Carlisle. Please," I added desperately. I looked at Esme pleadingly. "Esme…"

She looked away from my eyes. "Carlisle is right, Bella. We are pushing it."

I was in disbelief. Esme always agreed with me, especially concerning Edward. "Mom?" I whispered.

Esme ran out of the room.

"I'm sorry Bella," Carlisle said, getting up to follow Esme. "We leave tomorrow." He kissed my forehead and walked out.

Another month passed in our new house in Rochester, New York. I can't possibly express how I hate it here. The people here are despicable, especially that Rosalie Hale and Royce King. And also…Edward wouldn't know where to find us.

Esme and I were giving Carlisle, unfairly, a hard time because of the mood, but we just couldn't help our gloom.

Carlisle was up in his office with Esme. I was downstairs reading, so when the door surprisingly knocked for the first time I jumped and fell off the couch.

"Ow," I groaned more as a response for falling than for actual pain. In all actuality there was none.

I got up and brushed myself off. Esme and Carlisle were at the top of the staircase looking at me in amusement and the door in curiousity.

"Um. I'll get it?" I said, but it came out sounding like a question. Neither of them moved.

I opened the door and froze. Staring at me sheepishly with topaz eyes was Edward Anthony Masen Cullen. Neither of us said anything. We just took each other in silently.

"Bella dear? Who is it?" Esme called from upstairs.

"I don't expect you to take me back," Edward started, shaken out of his reverie by Esme. Up the stairs Esme and Carlisle gasped at his voice. "Just give me a second chance Bella. I love you."

I didn't say anything. I threw my arms around his neck and pressed my lips firmly against his. Edward reacted right away, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me flush against him. He moved his lips in sync with me.

This time the kiss was urgent or desperate. It was pure and simple and full of love.

We pulled away, gasping for unneeded air. He took his hand from my waist and stroked my cheek.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"It's all the same," I said.

He smiled and leaned down to kiss me again.

A/N: Okay so I got say two reviews last chapter…Thanks to those two, you know who you are.
And frankly, it wasn't very motivating, only getting two. That was a really good chapter in my opinion! But whatever, to each their own. I'm sorry if some of you didn't like how the story went, but it's how it fell into place in my head. And when I write I like letting the chips fall, fall where they may!
Please more reviews. I'm very excited about this chapter. I wrote it so long ago and am glad its finally going up. I'm leaving for Florida on the 14th and will be back on the 22nd. Which is why I'm giving you all this very long chapter. I'll have internet access though, so I will take time out of my busy Harry Potter seeing, Disney World visiting schedule to reply to reviews like I like to do.

Thanks for staying with me! Review please! It's very motivating.

Song is by Sick Puppies. (look for it on youtube, it will be with a free hugs video). Very moving song.

LT.