This Constricting Feeling chpt 11
Zero was still sleeping but he just felt like someone was watching him. So he opened his eyes only to find Kaname standing next to his bed eating chocolate pudding. "What the hell are you doing?!"
"Eating pudding." He ate another spoonful only making Zero angrier.
"Not that Idiot. Why are you watching me sleep?!" He sat up wiping his eyes.
"You're kind of cute when you sleep. You know you're not yelling and glaring. You look so innocent. I never saw you like that so I was just curious." And he continued eating his pudding. Zero got out of bed and sighed. He was still tired and not in the mood to argue.
"Cute?"
"Yeah. You know. Little kid cute." He finally finished the pudding so threw the cup away and washed the spoon.
"I think you're just a pervert." He started dressing only because it was getting to him. He watched him sleeping. He needed to put more clothes on.
"If I was I could've turned toward the bathroom and looked through that huge crack you had in the door. I think you wanted me to look." Zero didn't think he left a crack in his door so he began to panic. Maybe he did go in the bathroom.
"No I didn't Asshole?!" Kaname only laughed.
"I'm just kidding. Calm down." Zero now knew what Kaname was planning. It was obvious. He decided he was gonna fight back and he knew exactly how.
"I have a headache. I'm gonna go get some stuff at the store. Do you want something?"
"How about I go with you?" Zero was trying to keep him here. What he was getting at the store was for his plan and he didn't want him to know.
"Dude, I'm just going get some Advil. Do you want to hold my hand everywhere I go? How about you stay here and order me some breakfast?" Maybe that'd work.
"It's lunch. I'm a vampire. I'm supposed to be asleep right now but I'm up."
"Okay Mr. Particular. Get me some lunch then." He threw the paper that was beside him toward Kaname for him to order room service. 'Room service... Sounds like we we're a couple... No. It's just because I'm lazy and don't want to go anywhere. Wait a minute. I better hurry. He might put something in my food.' He ran out the door to the store inside the hotel.
000
Zero walked in the store and grabbed a bottle of Advil and of course the laxatives he was thinking about this morning. The women's were cheaper so guess which ones he got. Yup. He walked up to the counter and the cashier looked at him all confused. It was a guy so he would understand. "It's for my wife. You know women. They're embarrassed for the cashier to know they're constipated." He laughed.
"You must really love her then." If it is Kaname on the toilet all night long leaving me alone and letting me sleep in peace then yes I love her a lot. "I'm glad I'm not married."
"Well it's coming. Good luck when that day comes. You're gonna need it." He walked out the store and walked into the bakery another step in his plan. He walked up to the counter. "Excuse me. I would like to buy some brownies. Can you put M&Ms in them?"
"Of course. It will take a few minutes though."
"I'll wait. Do you have pink ones?"
"No but we can paint them pink." He looked at her all weird. "No no... It's edible. You're not a baker so you won't understand."
"Okay. They're for my sisters and they love pink. Just do me a favor." She nodded. "Can you make the M&Ms in the shape of letters?"
"Sure. Which letters?"
"I just want you to cut them into four and on each one a letter. I want a Z, K, Y, and H." She nodded as she wrote on her little notepad. She told him how long it would take then he walked out into the next store. He had to look around for future plans. 'Tonight is the toilet so tomorrow...' He kept thinking as he walked in the store. 'Tomorrow has to be something only for him... Let's see. Now I have to remember what it is so I don't do whatever I plan.' He picked up a container small enough to fit in his pocket. He'd come back tomorrow if need be. He bought the container then went into the bathroom. He pulled out the pack of laxatives and crushed them into powder but he did keep one intact. He put the powder in the container and the other laxative well you'll find out later. The paper went into the trash with the bag. He put the Advil and container back in his pocket. The other laxative stayed in his hand as he walked back to the bakery. Once he was handed the pan of brownies he picked up the M&M in the middle of the K and ate it. And then the laxative took it's place. He went back to his room. The food hadn't come yet but Kaname had two glasses of the stupid blood tablet crap by the fridge ready for them for when the food came.
"What do you got there?"
"Brownies. They looked good and I was hungry. I got some for all of us. See? Letters for everybody." He placed the pan on the table then grabbed two plates to begin cutting them. He gave Kaname his brownie first. He held the plate but stared at Zero. "What? Eat it."
"You didn't poison it?"
"The place made it not me. I can't tell them to put poison in it. You want me to eat mine first?" He nodded. So Zero ate his brownie. Then stared at Kaname for him to eat his. "Eat it! I paid good money for that! We're sharing the same room. Come on. If I did do something to it you could suffocate me with my pillow. I want to live." He leaned against the wall with his arms crossed glaring at the other. He waited for the guy to eat the brownie.
"Ow... That M&M was hard." Yeah cuz it's not a M&M.
"Come on. The M&M is hard?! Are you serious?!" He messaged his temples so he could calm down. "Alright. I guess I'll go give these to the girls and ask them if their M&Ms are hard."
"It's not funny. I'm serious."
"Well I can't get a refund." He made sure the Pureblood swallowed it then grabbed the plate.
"Yours wasn't hard?"
"I couldn't care less if I had cement in there. I paid for it and I plan to eat it. I'll be back in a few." Zero went into the next room and left the plate in there for the girls. When he walked out the room service guy was by the door. "So what'd he buy us?
"Pizza... Are you guys together?"
"No. He's just a friend I guess. Trust me. No one should ever have to marry that guy. And he bought a pizza... That's not romantic. Poor woman when he meets one." The guy handed him the box.
"Why are you in here with him then? He sounded like he was being all romantic on the phone. He said 'my honeybun is coming and he really loves pizza. Put the pepperoni in the shape of a heart please.' It sounded like you were together but I asked cuz you look straight."
"Honeybun? The damn pizza has a heart on it? I'm gonna kill him. That Asshole! He always has to play tricks on me. What would you do if your friend did that?"
"Um I don't know. Give him a lot of sleeping pills then superglue something to his stomach. I mean if you really want to touch it."
"...That sounds like a good idea. Anything else? Come on. Would you want someone to do that to you?!"
"No way! Um... Dope him up real good. Paint his toenails and fingernails with flower designs, put him some makeup and lipstick, put him a bra and you could put a thong in his clothes and dump his underwear so he'll have to wear it, then you take him a picture... Blackmail."
"Dude give me your number. I have to call you for your ideas."
"What if I run out... And I don't know you... And what if he finds out and comes kill me..."
"I'll pay you and we'll probably never see you again. Here's a hundred." He gave the guy a hundred dollars but he stared at it like he didn't believe it.
"This is a hundred! You sure?"
"It's just a hundred. It's no big deal."
"No big deal?! What's your problem?!" Anyway the guy gave Zero his number and kept staring at the money. "Oh there's parmesan right there. Maybe you can mix it with some kind of powder though I wouldn't know what to use." Before he finished Zero was in the room. "Maybe he figured out what to mix with it. I should come back tomorrow to see what happened."
000
Zero walked in the room with the trey and saw Kaname at the table. He was grinning at him. Zero placed the trey on the table then sat across from him. "Did the guy say something to you?" Zero was gonna act like he didn't know so Kaname could think he won.
"Yeah. He was laughing and called me Honeybun. Whatever that means. Oh I need to take this." He stood back up and headed to the fridge for some water. He saw the two glasses of blood wine. He pulled both bottles from his pocket and slowly put half of the powder in each of the glasses then opened the Advil to take two pills with the water. He put both bottles back in his pocket and watched the powder slowly dissolve. They were in front of him so Kaname couldn't really see what he did but he knew he didn't drink from them.
"I fixed that glass for you. You don't have to drink something else." He stood up and went beside Zero who was leaning by the fridge with his hand on his head. "You okay?"
"Yeah. It should start working later." He watched Kaname grab both glasses.
"Did you poison this?"
"You can't poison poison. You know I'm not drinking that. You shouldn't have fixed it." He pulled Zero back to the table and forced him to sit in the chair.
"It's probably because you didn't eat." So he opened the box and watched Zero look at the pizza with the pepperoni shaped as as a heart.
"I knew you were flirting with me."
"It was just for a joke. I thought you'd be mad and holler at me. It's not fun anymore."
"You Asshole! How dare you put a heart on my food! Tomorrow you're getting it!" But Kaname just laughed.
"There it is. That's what I wanted to see." They each took a slice of pizza and put it in their plate. Zero watched Kaname open the pack with parmesan in it and watched him pour it on the pizza. But then he got up and headed to the bathroom. Zero poured some of the remaining laxative on top of the parmesan, stuck the bottle back in his pocket, then started pouring some cheese on his also. He ate that slice then grabbed a second and put parmesan on that slice but Kaname grabbed his wrist. He looked back at him like he was stupid. Here he was enjoying his pizza after the guy begged him to eat... "What did you do?"
"Poured some cheese on my pizza. What are you doing? Did you wash your hands?!"
"Of course I did?" Kaname sat back in his chair and ate the slice of pizza. Zero tried not to laugh.
"Honeybun? You told him I was your honeybun? What kind of nickname is that?"
"There was a honeybun commercial on tv so that's what I said." Zero watched Kaname drink the wine. "Why are you watching me like that?"
"You called me a damn honeybun that's why!" He sighed. "...You can have mine. You know I'm not drinking it." After eating the last slice he stood up and drank his bottle of water.
"I'll be happy if you drink it."
"So why do I want you to be happy?" And he watched Kaname drink his glass too. Everything was going as planned.
"If I'm happy you're happy."
"I'm going take a bath. Don't come in."
"I won't."
000
Zero walked in the bathroom and locked the door. He looked at everything before he touched it and refused to use the shampoo while he was there. For some reason he thought this plan would backfire on him. But he stripped and started to shower anyway. Well halfway through the shower Kaname barged in holding his stomach. "I told you not to come in!" He hid himself.
"I got to crap!" He quickly pulled down his pants and sat on the toilet. Zero stopped the shower and grabbed the towel to wrap around himself. He grabbed his clothes then went to walk out the door. "Zero, hide your ass please." He saw the Pureblood smirking as he was walking out the bathroom.
"You couldn't have waited until I finished taking a shower?! I was almost finished!"
"Maybe I should've waited a little longer. I might've could've saw you naked."
"Pervert!" So he walked out the room after slamming the door. He dressed in his nightclothes listening to the Pureblood on the toilet. He was kind of enjoying it since his plan worked well sort of. He decided to go next door a little while.
000
Zero knocked on their door and Yuuki answered. "Can I stay in here a little while?"
"But Zero..."
"Kaname has diarrhea. I'm not staying in there until he finishes. I'll go back later and check. Just a little while."
"Sure."
000
A few minutes later Zero went back in the room. Kaname was face down on the bed with his butt in the air. "I'm gonna kill you."
"I didn't do anything. It's all that chocolate and greasy food you ate. That normally does it." He walked to his own bed. "Anyway I should kill you for walking in while I took a shower."
"I didn't see that much." Zero crossed his arms demanding to know what he saw. "I saw most of you but I didn't see you're front. I promise." Zero rolled his eyes. "I didn't think you were so pale. Go out in the sun some. Sheesh."
"Leave me alone." He heard the vampire laughing. "What?"
"I can't believe I saw you naked."
"You said you didn't see the front!"
"You were naked in the shower. Of course I saw. I couldn't find the toilet."
"What? You thought the toilet was in the shower?" He fell back on his bed.
"If it makes you feel better I'll let you see me naked." He grinned only making Zero more pissed.
"I'm starting to think you love me." Well he had already saw him naked so it really didn't matter.
"No way! I hate you. You and your stupid gun. Anyway I will try to forget your ugly naked body." He slowly slid into bed since his butt still hurt.
"It doesn't seem like you thought it was ugly. I think you wanted to jump me I mean if you weren't crapping." Kaname turned on his side not wanting to answer the question.
"I'm very much straight. Good night Honeybun."
"Good night. I told Yuuki you had diarrhea. You should've seen her face."
"Shut up!" During the night Kaname got up and went on the toilet many times. Zero was smiling and at the same time trying to devise something else. But so was the Pureblood since he had a feeling Zero was behind this.
And so the pranks begin.
A/N: Well some of you guys asked me to update so yeah that was it. It was fun to write though. Don't worry. They still have five days on the island. ^.^