A/N: Many hugs and kisses for LTFran for her editing (as usual!) and thanks to all of you for your sweet comments~ fangirls of Mass Effect are the best! ^^ Sorry I took a bit of a holiday break XD I'm promising myself to try to complete this story as soon as I can~

Chapter 11
Unusual Plans

She waited until she got into the building's elevator and finally allowed herself to take a deep breath. She slumped against the rail and ran her hand through her hair.

Crazy revelation…right. Shepard pressed her hands against her eyes. That word wasn't anything close to what she was feeling right now.

Discovering that the Collectors were Protheans…finding out Saren was working for the Reapers…those were crazy revelations. What Kaidan had just told her was more like…finding a Volus that disliked credits…or finding out Krogans had a love for cute bunnies and rainbows. It was something that turned her perception of the universe upside down.

Her last relationship…she could barely remember when her last relationship was. All she could recall was that she had absolutely no romantic encounters ever since she joined the Alliance Military. She wasn't joking with Garrus when she said the Military made it difficult for her to meet new people. Even before she had become a Spectre, other people tended to shy away from her notoriety as the infamous hero of Akuze.

The elevator doors slid open and Shepard quickly stepped out. She was still feeling a little disorientated from the drink. Maybe I should get something in my stomach and take a long nap, she thought to herself as she left the building.

She saw Garrus standing by the stairs and her eyes widened. "Garrus! What are you doing out here…ah, wait." Shepard smacked her face with the palm of her hand. "Crap! I forgot I was supposed to be waiting for you back at the merchant wards. I'm so sorry."

Garrus let out a small sigh of relief. Shepard was fine and out of the apartment. He was beginning to think she would be spending the night with the son of a bitch. "It's okay. I wasn't waiting that long."

"How did you know where I was?"

Garrus pointed at his Omni-tool. "The tracking beacon."

"Oh yeah. I forgot all you guys have that to keep tabs on me. Hah." Shepard laughed. "Tali jokes and says it's the only way to make sure I don't go off and die on you all again."

Garrus awkwardly scratched the top of his head. "So…how's Alenko doing?"

Shepard jolted from surprise. "How did you know I was with Kaidan?"

"I…met up with Kasumi. She said you left the bar with Alenko after getting drunk." Garrus said cautiously.

"Ugh. I forgot about Kasumi. I guess now everyone knows about my great embarrassment." Shepard grinned sheepishly. "The great Commander Shepard, knocked on her ass from one drink."

"How are you feeling now?"

"To be honest, I'm not doing so well." Shepard rubbed her forehead. "Sorry, Garrus. I don't think I'm up for doing any more shopping with you."

Garrus took a step back to take a good look at Shepard. He had witnessed Shepard emerge from the bloodiest battles completely unscathed and looking fresh as a daisy. Right now, Shepard looked drained and exhausted, with deep circles under her eyes. Garrus frowned and stated bluntly, "You look like hell."

"I feel like it." Shepard admit. As if on cue, her stomach growled loud enough to be heard.

Garrus coughed to cover up Shepard's embarrassment. "I'm a bit hungry myself. Do you want to grab something to eat on the Citadel or do you want to go back to the Normandy?"

"Let's go back to the ship." Shepard decided. "I've been on it for so long that it feels like it's exhausting to be away from it. Sounds weird, doesn't it?"

Garrus shrugged. "That's not weird at all. It is our home, after all."

Shepard gave Garrus a half-smile. Home…she liked the way he said that. "Yeah. Let's go home."

From a distance, Samara watched Garrus take Shepard by the arm to steady her as they both walked away. "It appears they are both headed back to the Normandy." She murmured into her comm piece.

"By both, do you mean Shepard and Garrus?" Miranda asked, her voice a low buzz over the channel. She and Kasumi had left the bar and were now searching for Tali who had gone missing.

"Correct." Samara answered smoothly and stepped out from behind the information kiosk that she had been hiding behind. She watched both Shepard and Garrus slowly retreat from her view.

"Do you think…" Miranda hesitated. "Shepard and Alenko did anything while they were in his apartment?"

"What do you mean?" Samara asked.

"She's asking if Shepard has a womanly glow about her." Kasumi clarified, trying not to giggle.

"I do not know about any glow." Samara answered seriously. "But Shepard's time in Commander Alenko's home was very brief."

"Does Shepard look okay?" Miranda asked warily.

"Shepard appears unharmed." Samara reported. "However, it seems that she is most likely hungry. I overheard them mentioning getting back to the Normandy to get something to eat."

"It's not very nice of you to eavesdrop." A acerbic voice interrupted.

"If you were willing to assist us earlier, Samara wouldn't have had to resort to all this, Jack." Miranda replied over the link.

"Up yours, cheerleader." Jack hissed. "Unlike you, I was actually preparing something for Shepard for her passion party."

"Oh God." Kasumi groaned. "Do we want to know what you're up to?"

"Don't worry, it's nothing more than a little push in the right direction." They all could almost hear the smug smile on Jack's face. "I'm glad that Shepard didn't end up fucking that Alliance asshole. Would've ruined everything I had to set up."

"What did you set up?" Miranda asked suspiciously.

"None of your fucking business." Jack responded with a cheerful tone.

"Where are you right now? On the ship?" Miranda demanded.

"No, Miss Prodigy. I'm on Omega." Jack replied back sarcastically. "Of course, I'm on the ship. Won't stay here long though. I'm going to make myself scarce so they both could have some time alone together."

"You do realize they're not going to be alone." Kasumi interjected. "Joker and Legion are still there."

"I told Joker if he knows what's good for him, to get off the ship and keep his voyeurism fetish in check for the next few hours." Jack smirked. "And that creepy walking pile of junk is actually going to help me out with all this so don't worry about it."

Miranda sighed. "Fine. We'll stay away from the Normandy too. Kasumi and I are searching for Tali, she has her comm link turned off and Ken and Gabby are wondering where she went. Let us know when you come across her."

"Whatever." Jack said simply and her mic audibly switched off, disconnecting her from their channel.

Kasumi turned to look at Miranda. "So what do you think Jack prepared for Shepard?"

"Knowing that crazy woman…" Miranda scowled. "I'm imagining something involving placement of inappropriate sex-related machinery or tools all about our ship."

Kasumi bit her lip. "If that's the case, then we're all going to be chewed out by both Garrus and Shepard."

Miranda placed her hands on her hips and huffed. "What's done is done. At this point, our mission has completely failed and we should probably be trying to think up a good alibi to give her when she discovers the 'surprise' Jack has waiting for her."

Shepard let out a sigh of relief when the doors to the pressure chamber slid open and she stepped onto the Normandy's bridge. Even though she was only away for a few hours, it felt like she had just returned home after a long vacation. Garrus followed behind her and they both turned to see Joker muttering to himself in the cockpit. The pilot was too busy focusing on something on his panel to even notice their arrival.

"Hey, Joker." Shepard greet him.

Joker jumped in his seat. "Shit!" He quickly shut down his screens and turned his chair around. "The hell, Shepard! I thought you weren't going to be back for a while."

"Didn't think I had to report my comings and goings to you, Joker." Shepard raised an eyebrow. "But I'm sorry if I interrupted your time with the special websites you have for the extranet."

"Uh…yeah." Joker uncomfortably shifted in his seat and looked at Garrus. "So…are you and Garrus going to be here for the rest of the night?"

"I don't know about Garrus, but I know I am." Shepard gave the turian a pat on the back. "I'm going to get something to eat and get some sleep. It's been a rough day."

Garrus lifted his shoulders nonchalantly. "I may or may not head back out later."

"Fine, fine. I'm, uh…going to step out for a few hours and then going straight to my sleep pod when I come back."

Shepard and Garrus looked at each other in confusion and turned back to Joker. "That's okay…but why are you telling us?"

Joker grumbled and turned his chair back to the front. "Isn't it my duty as the main helmsman to inform my superior officer when I step off the ship? Or am I not allowed to do that?"

"Okay, okay. Jeez, I was just wondering." Shepard lifted her hands to calm him down. She didn't notice Garrus eyeing Joker with distrust. "I'm going to head to the restroom first to freshen up and I'll be down in the mess if you need me."

"I'll join you in a sec, Shepard." Garrus called from behind. "I'm going to check on something with Joker real quick."

"Sure. See you later, Joker." Shepard strolled off with a wave of her hand.

As soon as Shepard was far enough from hearing distance, Garrus bent down to speak to Joker. "Did the girls put you up to this?"

"What? No…" Joker drew out the word, turning his head to look at the turian. "None of the girls put me up to anything." He empathized every word, widening his eyes and trying to jerk his head casually towards EDI's inactive monitor station.

So they were being watched or being recorded. Garrus narrowed his eyes and inspected the cockpit, looking for any recently added camera equipment. Garrus lowered his voice. "Who?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Garrus." Joker's answer was loud. "I suggest you leave me alone and go back to the crew's quarters. I need to do some final checks before I leave the Normandy."

Garrus gave Joker an impatient glare but the pilot's face didn't crack from it's insincere mask. He let out a loud grunt of irritation and turned to walk away. "Fine. Do whatever you want."

As Garrus disappeared into the elevator, Joker let out the breath he was holding in and pulled up the screen panel he had been staring at. There were several feeds from the observation cameras all about the bridge, and obeying his instructions, he had disabled several of them in specific areas for the next 12 hours.

EDI's station immediately activated. "Jeff, disabling the cameras were sever the surveillance feeds to those areas. If anything were to happen in those areas, the Officers would have no evidence to review."

"That's the idea." Joker grumbled. He confirmed the shut down of the cameras and turned to his left. "EDI, bring Jack on the line."

EDI's hologram turned into a pale shade of blue as it entered communication mode. "Connecting to Jack."

After a few seconds, the rude voice responded into Joker's earpiece. "What?"

"It's done." Joker lowered his voice as much as he could. "I did what you told me to do, okay? I'm stepping off the ship as soon as I hang up."

"Good." Jack approved. "And they don't know anything, right? All cameras are turned off?"

"Nothing at all." Joker growled. "They're completely clueless. Why did you need the surveillance cameras to be down anyway?"

"Because I don't trust the Illusive Asshole or that blue nerd that became the new Shadow Broker. These days, anything can be leaked onto the fucking extranet. I got Shepard's back."

"What the hell do you think Shepard is going do tonight?" Joker yelled into the line, not caring if Garrus of Shepard were within earshot.

"You don't need to know. Just do your part and everything will be fine." Jack spoke derisively.

Joker made a mocking face to imitate Jack, daring only to do so since she couldn't see what he was doing. "You better keep your damned promise."

"A promise is a promise." Jack feigned fake innocence. "As long as you do what I told you to do, I won't make a new overhead entrance in your cockpit. Just get off the fucking ship."

Jack abruptly ended the connection before Joker could make his retort. He pounded his fist on his armrest in frustration but it was immediately followed by swearing. "Damn it!"

"Is something wrong, Jeff?" EDI inquired from the side.

"No." He glared at his broken finger. "Just another reason to remind me why I'm still single."