SUMMARY: Betrayed by his latest master and mocked by the cruel hand of destiny, Sir Guy of Gisborne returns to Nottingham twenty years after his banishment determined to reclaim the life which should have been his.
A/N: Set in an alternate Series 1 where Guy has never met Vasey before his arrival in Nottingham, this fic will explore what impact an earlier acquaintance with Marian might have had on Guy's life and ultimate fate.
AUTHOR: lexie aka lillianschild
RATING: PG-13/R (probably in later chapters)
PAIRING: Guy/Marian
GENRE: Romance
DISCLAIMER: Tiger Aspect Productions and the BBC are free to claim whatever they own of this piece, except Guy's thoughts and and my words, which are ours to keep.
A/N: Once again sorry for the very long delay. Hopefully, now that my summer holidays are about to start, I'll have more time and energy left to devote to my writing.
Sorry for the extremely long delay in updating this fic. I'll try to make it up to you by posting a double chapter. Enjoy!
CHAPTER XI
The stables were deserted except for Guy and Stormbringer. The morning after Allan's death, the tournament had come to a close and the majority of the visiting knights and their retinues left Nottingham with the exception of Lord Vasey and Sir Jasper who- based on a snatch of conversation Guy had overheard- stayed behind awaiting Winchester's return to move forward with their plans.
The recent discovery of a potential association between Vasey and the despicable Lord Winchester had given the knight further food for thought. Since Guy's injury had prevented him from collecting the ransom he'd counted on and his savings were dangerously slim, the knight had been seriously considering taking up Vasey on his offer. However, the knowledge that Peter Vasey and Lady Marian's future husband were close shed the late Lord Geoffrey's younger brother into a completely different light.
Nottingham Castle seemed to be besieged by vultures, and the Sheriff's small circle was clearly short of allies. Lady Marian was in bad need of a friend, and Guy knew there wasn't much he could do to aid her. Not only were his connections at Court non-existent after his fallout with King Richard, Guy had also made his rapport with her even more complicated by giving in to his impulses.
He'd never experienced such deep feelings for a woman before. When he was with Lady Marian he felt he could be a better man; a man his parents would have been proud of. Having her in his arms and being blessed by her kiss made him feel worthy of being loved despite all his flaws and the heinous crimes committed in God's name while serving King Richard in the Holy Land. However, he knew better than to give himself to self-delusion. She was fated to marry for duty; and a stolen kiss, no matter how sweet, was no proof she saw in him more than someone with whom to assuage her desire and pent-up emotions. Intent on keeping his distance, he stayed away from the hall except for meals and took refuge in his chamber or with Stormbringer in the stables.
Although the thought of leaving her filled him with sorrow, he was aware the longer he put off his departure the larger was the risk of giving in to temptation. His soul was black already, but hers was just too precious for her reputation to be tainted by his own incapacity to keep his passion under restraint.
Guy sighed and slipped his left arm out of the sling. Tentatively, he raised it only to clench his teeth on experiencing an excruciating lance of pain in his shoulder and affected limb.
Marian and Meg were sitting next to the fireplace in Sir Edward's study, mending clothes to donate to Kirklees'. Even though the Sheriff's daughter felt more at home around horses than a sewing basket, she was better at darning than embroidering, and found the menial task a welcome distraction.
The chatelaine of Nottingham's Castle wanted to shed off her hostess mantle for a while and spend some time with her younger cousin, who she'd neglected lately. Marian missed the quiet moments of camaraderie she'd always enjoyed with Meg and loathed their recent fallout. And even though she knew herself to be largely responsible for their disagreement, accepting and apologising for her own mistakes had never been Marian's strongest suit- stubbornness being a family character trait Young Meg shared with her.
The youngest cousin sighed and looked at the half-darned shirt with hopeless resignation. She'd never been particularly dexterous with a thread and needle and, to be honest, she'd always preferred climbing up trees and dreaming of a life away from the stifling strictures imposed on her gender to devoting time to pursuits she had no patience for. And today she was too overwhelmed by melancholy to make an effort even in the name of charity.
Marian regarded the young woman with sympathy. "You look tired, love. I am concerned about you, Meg."
Meg's lip trembled as she jabbed her needle through the fabric. "I wish I were treated as an adult and not as a foolish girl. I was feeling particularly low the other day and Sir Guy was just being nice, and then you had to go and make a rush judgement, spoiling everything. He must be offended considering he hasn't shown his face lately. It wouldn't surprise me if he decided to leave Nottingham against Tuck's advice."
Although Marian knew herself to blame for his recent decision to make himself scarce, she couldn't confess to her distraught cousin the real reason behind his potentially imminent departure.
"He has no master and needs to earn a living. Lingering here longer might interfere with his chances of finding employment elsewhere."
"He could stay in Nottingham. Sir Edward's Master-at-Arms has hinted he might welcome an early retirement."
"You know as well as I that Father's future as a Sheriff is hanging on a thread and that Prince John is eager to place one of his men in charge. Sir Guy has a better chance of advancement by serving a younger lord, someone who can offer him security, even an estate of his own."
"Can't Winchester help him? He's got friends in high places. I'm sure that if you were to ask him... ."
"I'm afraid it's out of the question, Meg."
Carrying a tray with refreshments, Sir Jasper appeared at the door just in time to see the younger cousin storm out of the room. "Lady Meg?"
"I'm sorry, Sir Jasper. I've got a terrible headache."
"Is there anything I can...?"
"I thank you for your solicitude, but it's nothing that a nap won't cure."
Marian cursed the nobleman's untimely arrival. She hated it when she didn't part on good terms with Meg because she loved her like a sister and couldn't bear the thought of losing her too.
She should have known better than to come to the stables. She had been stirred by him in his black clothes, but nothing had prepared her for the impact of seeing that strong warrior's torso without any wrappings. To watch his shapely and half-naked body in fluid motion as he tended to his equally beautiful destrier, completely unaware of her presence, revealed to her what it would feel like to be entitled to admire such a sight in the privacy of their quarters every night. At least now, she'd have this memory of him to treasure, the bittersweet recollection of a fallen angel illuminated by the sunlight dustily filtering into the castle's stables.
"Sir Guy?" she finally asked, hoping he didn't notice the tremor in her voice or the blush she could feel blossoming on her cheeks.
"My lady!" he exclaimed visibly surprised.
"May I have a word with you outside, please? It'll only take a moment," she requested, demurely looking toward the floor as he hastened to put on the shirt he'd taken off in order to bathe and brush Stormbringer.
"Of course, my lady."
She stepped out of the stables in search of fresh air to collect herself while he locked his horse in a stall.
She had pledged her hand in marriage to Lord Winchester, who was expected to be back soon to wed her. In the eyes of the world she was as good as married and should know better than to wander around unchaperoned. However, this might be her last chance to speak to Sir Guy alone, and she felt she needed to clear the air between them before his departure. Even if there could never be a future together for them in the cards, she would hate it if the parting words he remembered forever were the unjustly bitter ones she'd spat at him in the chapel.
The cool breeze of the evening had softened the fiery blush on her cheeks, but the erratic thumping of her heart was far from being under control. In fact, it had become so rapid when she heard the jingling of his spurred boots close behind her she was sure even he could hear it.
The sweet perfume of her late mother's roses beckoned Marian to seek shelter and comfort in the secluded privacy of the garden Sir Edward's mourned wife used to tend so lovingly in life. Marian's father had been an affectionate and attentive parent, and yet, Marian had never missed having a mother more than at this time in her life when her woman's heart was finally awakening.
Cupping a fragile red rosebud in her hand she leant forward and inhaled the delicate scent, letting herself be transported to more innocent days when she was a younger maid full of romantic dreams.
"Is everything all right, milady?" asked Sir Guy, bursting her short-lived bubble of isolation.
She closed her eyes, feeling the enchantment of his masculine voice wrap her quivering body like a blanket. There was a hint of tension and anxiety underlying its warmth and that comforted her in an odd way; she was not alone in her predicament.
"I owe you an apology," she replied softly as she turned around to face him.
"I don't think..."
"Please, " she interrupted him, finally raising her eyes to meet the gaze she'd been avoiding since walking into the stables to find him half undressed,"I need to."
Marian wondered how many greys and blues there were on God's palette for she hadn't been able to decide on one yet, so many were the shades she'd seen reflected in the knight's beautiful eyes.
"I appreciate the kindness you showed Meg the other day."
"I am pleased to be of service to you and yours. Lady Meg reminds me a lot of my youngest sister, Bella," he replied, his lips curving up into a dangerously appealing smile.
"You must be really close," she interjected only to see his smile fade.
"We used to be inseparable. It was hard for her when I left for the Crusades and she had to move to the abbey. I was looking forward to our meeting after so long; she's the only family I've got left. But, now... " he raked back his luxuriant black hair, which curled enticingly at his nape."Things happened, things neither of us had any control over... Now she must hate me for what she thinks I've done to her," he added, rubbing his hand over his jaw before covering his mouth with it in a clear gesture of impotence.
An overwhelming desire to offer him the comfort of her arms assaulted her and she inched closer, curving her impulse to give way to her urgent and unspoken wish.
"What is your sister like?"
"Isabella?" he grinned roguishly. "Oh, I have a temper but she... !" he said shaking his head with an appealing smile.
The unmistakable love for his younger sibling tinged his warm voice and she felt enveloped in a wonderful and protective cocoon once again. It'd be so easy to surrender to the passion that was burning inside her for the first time in her life, to beg him to kiss her and make her forget.
"She was seven when our parents died."
"How old were you?"
"Sixteen."
"A young man on the cusp of manhood," she added softly.
"Death cares not for young or old or for those left behind. You were a babe when your mother died... and your father... He must have loved her dearly."
In an age when marriages amongst the upper classes were mostly economic and power alliances, many of her father's contemporaries regarded his state as a mere defect of character. But she had no doubt Sir Guy could and did understand how a love's loss could break not just a man's spirit but also his heart.
"It's said that time heals all wounds."
"Does it really, my lady?"
"It's a comforting thought."
"I've heard many tales of your father in the past."
"You have?" she asked with a clear hint of curiosity in her voice.
"This isn't my first time in Nottingham. I was born in France but spent a few years here when I was very young."
"You did?! That explains it then."
"Pardon?" he arched an eyebrow.
"My father told my cousin Meg that the tall knight reminded him of someone he knew a long time ago. She tried to find out more but then he... well... his mind started wandering."
"It must be very difficult for you both to see him so fragile.I admire your strength; having to shoulder the responsibility for the estate and your family must be a great burden."
Had those words come out of Winchester's mouth she'd have suspected a not very subtle hint that she needed a man in her life to take charge, but the knight sounded sincere, as if he could actually see into her heart.
"I'm not alone. There's my family and … the earl is also helping, of course," she replied, finding it hard to disguise her disgust for her late mother's suitor.
"I have no doubt he's eager to offer his help," he added ironically. "I'm sorry. You must think I'm forgetting my place. Believe me when I say I'd not begrudge you a happy marriage but... I wouldn't like to think of you miserably wed, any more than I would my only sister, my lady."
"I am no relation to you."
"I'm well aware of that."
"I can be nothing to you, Sir Guy," she told him in a broken voice.
"You already are important to me, Marian. Far more than many things," he murmured huskily, a well of emotion banking in his blue-grey eyes.
God moved in mysterious ways.
GISBORNE MANOR- TWENTY-ONE YEARS EARLIER
It was late summer, the perfect time of the year to start drying the herbs she and Isabella had collected the passing months. On this occasion, the harvest had been more abundant thanks to the new patch of land Guy had helped her till and sow to ensure there would be enough medicinal herbs for her ointments and salves come winter.
Despite the ten years that had elapsed since her arrival from her native France, and the family she and Roger had raised in England, Ghislaine still felt like an outsider most of the time- one who was only tolerated by the villagers because she was married to their lord. Had it not been for her skills as a healer to whom they could turn when in need, she had a feeling the women in the village would have been happy to shun her; being born an exotic raven beauty with alabaster skin, deep blue grey eyes and long lush eyelashes was far from a recommendation amongst the wives of Gisborne's vassals.
Ghislaine was in the process of stalking and hanging the tidy bundles upside down from the rafters of the storeroom when the youngest of Knighton's horse grooms came rushing in.
"M'lady," said the boy breathlessly. "La... Lady... She..."
"Calm down, Stephen," chuckled Lady Gisborne. "Catch your breath first, and tell me how I can be of any service to you."
"Yes, M`lady."
"Here, take some water," she told him, leaving aside the John's wort, vervain, skullcap, valerian, chamomile, and crampbark to pour him a goblet from the pitcher. "Better?" she smiled, once he had swallowed it down."Now, tell me..."
"It's Lady Knigthon, M'lady. She said it's time. I've been to the doctor's, but he isn't at home; he's gone to York, and ... I thought that you might be able to help deliver the baby. M'lord didn't want to leave for London but M`lady convinced him because the baby wasn't due for a couple of weeks..."
"Has your Ladyship told you when her labour work started?"
"I don't know... she... she just said 'The baby's coming. Go fetch the doctor,'" replied the stable boy with a hint of panic in his voice.
"It's all right, Stephen. Don't fret. Let me gather a few things and we'll be on our way. In the meantime, why don't you go to the stables? My son Guy should be there. Tell him what you told me and ask him to help you saddle my mare and a horse for you; we'll get there faster if we ride. Go!"
KNIGHTON HALL
"Where's Dr Philps?" frowned Sir Edward's steward, eying Ghislaine with distrust when he saw Stephen riding on the back of a beautiful black destrier handled by a young boy who must have been no older than fifteen, but who already mastered the horse as if beast and man were one and the same.
"He's in York. Lady Gisborne's helped me sister when she got her baby last summer. She'll know what to do," replied the groom as Guy gave him a hand to dismount from the tall animal.
"I'll need clean sheets and plenty of boiled water," instructed Ghislaine as she stepped into the manor and was met by a very young and fidgety kitchen maid.
"Yes, M'lady," she curtsied.
"Would you mind showing me where your Ladyship's rooms are located?" Lady Gisborne's asked.
"This way," said the steward gravely, climbing up the stairs and stopping on the landing to point at the second room on the right.
"Guy, wait for me outside just in case I need you. This might take a while..." she told him from the stairs.
"Should I fetch Bella?" asked the tall long-limbed boy.
"Mm... No. Just ride to Cuthbert's Manor and ask her Ladyship if she'd mind her staying the night. Tell her where I am and reassure her we're going to collect Bella in the morning. And then come back, Guy.."
Ghislaine knew considering getting her fifteen-year-old son to aid her in the delivery would not earn her points amongst those who already eyed her with suspicion. Still, the mother and baby's lives were first and so far she hadn't seen any in the household that might be of any use in case of an emergency. She could imagine the meek kitchen maid passing out and there was no way she would have Sir Edward's steward in the room. Guy might be a boy but he wasn't squeamish; he wouldn't faint at the sight of blood and, above all, he had the touch.
Eight months ago she would have never entertained the thought of asking Guy to assist her if the worst came to the worst. However, he had delivered more than a fair share of animals while Roger was away and he had even saved single-handedly a couple of foals which were born breach. Hopefully, that wouldn't be the case with Lady Knighton but there would have to be two people in the room if there were any such complication, or if she had to keep the patient calm while performing an incision to get the baby out.
Ghislaine watched her son walk out of the hall and untether Roger's destrier before mounting.
It was a pity he'd been born the eldest and that his path had already been chartered for him. He was a sensitive boy and had a wonderful gift. He would have been a great healer. Had he been the second son, he might have been given the chance to study medicine. Now... he was destined to follow in his father's footsteps. Roger would be proud of his advances and she was sure her husband wouldn't be too glad to learn of Lord Deveraux's passing because it meant their son's training as a squire had had to be cut short, but she'd missed Guy at home and he was a great help on the estate despite his young age.
Lady Knighton's labour work was long and exhausting. The beautifully ethereal green-eyed woman was a fighter- Ghislaine had seen stronger and more rustic females pass out under the strain Sir Edward's wife was presently going through.
The delivery was everything Ghislaine feared it might be. Not only was her patient small, the baby was coming two weeks early and wasn't in the right position.
"Mother, her pulse's too weak," commented Guy, checking the woman's heartbeat.
"Come here, son. Your hands are smaller and thinner than mine. I need you to finish turning the baby in the canal or we're going to lose both of them."
"Mother..." he hesitated
"She won't mind, Guy. We haven't got much time left... There," she said as he knelt down at the feet of the bed." Can you feel the cord?"
"Yes... "
"Can you turn the baby around safely?"
"I think I can," he said confidently.
"Good," she smiled, moving to the head of the bed to check on the patient.
"She's almost there, Mother."
"Darling," murmured Ghislaine, wiping Lady Knighton's brow with a damp cloth,"I know you're tired but I need you to make one last effort. OK?"
"Mm," she nodded feebly.
"Guy?" asked Ghislaine with urgency in her voice.
"It's safe now."
"Did you hear, love? One last push and you can hold your baby... Guy, darling, come here. She hasn't got enough strength left to do it all on her own. I need you to support her back so that she can sit up. Gravity will help the baby go down faster... That's it, love... She's crowning... One more push so that I can get her shoulders free... . "
"Mum?" he urged her.
"I've got it," replied his mother just as the newborn announced her birth with a strong wailing sound. "You've got a beautiful healthy baby girl," murmured Ghislaine, cutting the cord and wrapping the small infant in a clean sheet.
"Marian," sighed the new mother with a smile, stroking the girl's soft cheek before slipping away.
"Hold the baby, Guy. Take her away. She needs to be washed," said Ghislaine, passing him the crying bundle.
"Mother, can you save her?" he asked gravely, looking at Lady Knighton's drained face.
"I'll do my best."
Ghislaine's semblance and her dismissal from the room didn't bode at all well.
Guy closed the door behind him and, looking at the baby now lying placid in his arms, hoped God would spare Marian the grief and guilt of being her mother's unwitting killer.
He felt a sudden and inexplicable tug when the baby's tiny hand clutched at his tunic, a strong wish to be able to protect her against the cruelty and hurt of the world she'd just entered.
His father had once told him Saracens believed that if a person saved another, their lives were forever linked.
God had decided to put Marian on his path today. Only time would tell of His designs when he'd brought them together so early in their lives.