Chapter Eleven

"Edward?"

Bella's moan filled the air as she blindly felt around the bed for her husband. He immediately pulled her into his chest and kissed her hair. He breathed in relief that she was awake and speaking. God had answered his prayers.

"I'm here love. Do you need anything? How do you feel?"

"My throat is dry," she rasped. "And my body hurts horribly. I don't quite understand." Bella closed her eyes once again as if she were going to fall back to sleep. Edward quickly shook a little.

"Bella love, I need you to stay awake for a little while. I will get you some tea. It will help sooth you throat."

Edward quickly got up from the bed and ran from the room startling the other awake. "She's awake," he breathed. "Alice could you please make some tea? Papa would you come and check her?"

Everyone quickly got into action. The women were in the kitchen preparing a hearty breakfast and some hot tea for Bella and the men. Jasper and Emmett went out to tend to the animals and chop more wood while Carlisle and Edward returned to the room to check on Bella.

Carlisle sighed in relief as he listened to her lungs and checked her fever. Bella was on the road to recovery, but she still had a long ways to go before she was out of the woods even…let alone completely free of her illness. She was still pail and frail and there was no telling how long it would be before she was well enough to travel, but at least she would live; that was a sure thing.

Edward grinned at his father and nearly wept in happiness that he would not lose his new bride. He pulled her close to him propping her up against his chest and kissed her head over and over again.

"I thought I had lost you my love," he whispered into her ear. "I thought I would never get to tell you I love you again or hear your beautiful laughter. I was afraid your beautiful eyes had forever dimmed and you would be taken from this earth and sent back to our heavenly father. Oh my Bella, I was so scared."

He rocked her a little and she couldn't help the small smile the spread across her face. "Edward my darling, I could never leave you alone. Heaven would not be heaven without you by my side. I am here love; please do not fret any longer."

Bella reached a shaky hand up and ran her fingers through Edwards's hair, down the side of his stubbled cheek and down to his chest. She hummed in contempt, but soon found that to be a bad move on her part. Violent coughs shook her frail body causing her to cry out in pain.

Edward quickly rubbed her back and kissed her head. "I'm sorry love; let me get you something for the cough." Edward left the room once again only to return a few moments later with Bella's tea and a bottle Bella could not identify.

"I need to open your dressing gown to expose your chest love. Do not worry, you will not show anything that would embarrass you." Edward opened the jar that contained a goopy substance that had a horribly strong smell. Bella wrinkled her nose.

"What is that?" she coughed.

"It's called Vaporub. It's made by a company called Vicks. It has only been around for a few years, but it works wonders. It will help you. I just need to rub it onto your chest and the fumes will help your breathing and the cough. The teas however, will sooth the pain."

Edward made quick work of rubbing the goopy gel onto Bella's chest. It was cold and horribly uncomfortable, but Bella could already feel the vapors working their magic. She took in a deep breath and leaned back against the pillows. Edward handed her some tea that she sipped on before falling asleep once again.

Over the next week Bella was able to stay awake for longer periods of time and was even able to sit up against the headboard to sip on some soup that Esme made her. She felt horrible that everyone had stopped their lives because she had fallen ill, but was thankful for the loving family she was so blessed to have. Little by little Bella began to regain some of her strength. Her pallid skin was once again gaining some color and Edward was finally breathing a bit easier.

Nearly two weeks after she fell into the water Edward and his father made the decision that Bella was strong enough to travel home. She was still week and her cough only slightly better, but she was improving. Jasper and Emmett turned the back of the buckboard into a make shift bed for Bella to lie in while we traveled home. Several blankets were lied down to keep the chill from underneath while several more were tucked around her. Pillow surrounded her to keep her from being jarred around too much. Mama rode in the back with her to make sure that she was okay, while Edward took our carriage and rode with Alice.

Bella sighed as Edward carried her out the door of the cabin early the morning they left.

"I'm actually going to miss it here," she said snuggling into Edward's shoulder.

"You want to come back?"

Bella laughed and looked into his eyes as a violent cough shook the two of them. "Sorry," she murmured.

"But yes, even after this I wish to come back as often as we can. It's peaceful and quiet and I just think it's perfect."

Edward kissed his wife softly and nodded his agreement. "I agree with you love. I promise we will come back and often."

Edward had decided then that they would indeed build a cabin of their own here and it would be a gift for his beautiful wife. He looked out over the water for a few more moments imagining their kids playing around the lake with their cousins, learning how to swim, and fish. It was all so beautiful. With a happy sigh he carried Bella to the buckboard and helped get her settled in. They would be stopping often to make sure that she was still fairing well.

It was extremely late when the family returned home. Everyone was exhausted from the trip and quite hungry. Angela, bless her wonderful heart, quickly made some soup and sandwiches for the group and made sure that everyone was taken care of before going back to bed. She was an amazing person and Edward decided that she needed a raise and if she and Ben were going to be wed that he would build a cabin near the gardener's cabin. They would need their own space and if it kept on his two best workers he would be more than happy to allow them the luxury.

Edward insisted that the family stay the night since it was so late. The couple had plenty of room in their house and it would be nice for some of the rooms to actually be used. Everyone agreed and retired shortly after for the evening.

Bella yawned as Edward carried her up the stairs to their suit. He smiled down at her kissing her temple and holding her closer. She still wasn't out of the woods yet, but she was on the road to recovery. Edward knew quite well that if any sort of infection were to set in it could be the end, but he was determined to keep that from happening. He monitored her temperature several times daily and she was still getting a round of medication every day to keep infections at bay.

Bella sighed as Edward lied her down on the bed.

"Edward, you really need to stop all this worrying. I am going to be fine darling. It's just a little cold that I will get over in not time."

Edward was at a loss for words. "Little cold?" he nearly yelled causing Bella to shy away from him. "Bella, you have pneumonia. That is not a little cold love."

Edward climbed on the bed pulling his love close to him and kissing the top of her head. "Bella, this could kill you if we are not careful. If you exhort yourself too much, it could kill you. If you get an infection, I can kill you. Bella this is not something that you can just shrug your shoulders at and act like it's not a big deal. I can't lose you. Do you understand that? You are what holds me to this earth and if I were to lose you there would be no point for me to exist. I need you to get better. I need to make you get better. It's my job and I feel like I am failing you at every turn. First with that monster and with the wolves and now this. God forgive me for saying this, but you disserve so much better. I thought I would be a good husband to you. I thought I could protect and take care of you, but I am failing miserably."

Edward put his head into his hands and pulled at his hair. Bella's sobs quickly turned into heaving cough making her already labored breathing worse. She curled into a fetal position on her side and shook her head.

"You can't leave me," she coughed. "Please Edward; I need you like I need the air to breathe. You can't leave. Please don't send me away. Please…"

Another coughing fit cut off her words as Edward quickly pulled her into his lap. He cried with her wishing he knew what to do. He wanted to be selfish and keep her at his side always, but he also wanted to do what he thought was right and send her away to find a husband that would be better for her; a husband that could truly protect her.

"Bella," he cried. "What am I going to do?"

"Keep me," she whispered. "Forever. You told me forever…don't break your promise to me."

Bella's week body relaxed into Edwards arms. Try as she might she just couldn't stay awake. Her eyes drifted closed and she fell into a fitful sleep.

The following morning Edward was up before the sun. He still felt as though he was letting Bella down as a husband. He was not the protector he had promised her he would be. Yes, he could provide anything that she could ever dream of having and more, but he was failing her in the way that he felt mattered most. If he couldn't protect her, what good was he?

Edward walked down to the garden for a walk. He sat on the swing that he had strung up on the large willow near the pond at the back of their garden. He closed his eyes as he remembered Bella's excitement when he showed it to her. She had jumped into his arms and kissed him soundly before wiggling free and rushing to the swing and kicking off. She was carefree and light and he loved her so much it hurt to even think of letting her go. He would sit and watch her reading on that swing for hours or pushing her and reveling in the sound of her laughter. It was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard.

Edward was pulled out of his memories by the sound of someone walking to his side.

"I thought you had left me this morning," Bella rasped. Her throat was dry and soar and Edward could tell that she had been crying. He jumped from the swing and pulled her close. She shivered and coughed hard before pulling away.

"You shouldn't be out of bed Bella," Edward chastised as he picked her up bridal style after pulling his coat off and wrapping around her.

"I don't want you getting any sicker than you already are."

"What's it matter," Bella sighed a single tear falling from her eye. "You don't want me anymore anyway so what does it matter if I live or die."

Edwards face grew hard as anger coursed through his body.

"Don't ever speak those words again Isabella," he roared as they made it back to the house. He sat her down in one of the dining room chairs. "I love you too much for you to say such despicable things."

"You're the one who told me last night that I should find a better husband. Well, I'm telling you now Edward Cullen that I don't want anyone else and if you are just going to throw me away like yesterdays paper then I might as well die."

Bella was over exerting herself. She was becoming light headed and dizzy and the color was draining from her face. She swayed a little before continuing. "You promised me forever through all the good and bad sickness and health. You promised it was us together and nothing would come between that. We've been married less than two months and you are already done with me. You call that love Edward Cullen? Because is don't."

Bella was beyond mad as she made to get up and storm off to their room, however as she stood the dizziness over took her body and she passed out cold before Edward could react.