Chapter 12: Letting Him In
GabPOV
Of course we were going to be in the sister sorority of the guys… of all the strange things that have been going on in the past few weeks, this was the least incomprehensible. I noticed the warm glowing smile on Emmett's face, and turned to look at the rest of my friends… my family.
I know I have only known them a short time, but they have truly become closer to me than anyone in my life. The way they look after one another and love one another has given me a chance to finally see what a true family is, and I am grateful that they have so easily welcomed me into their fold.
As I glanced at my new found family, I noticed Edward's questioning gaze, and decided to let him in again.
Look, I see that you're having a hard time with not hearing me, but can't you understand that I need my privacy, at least in my own head? I thought to him. I knew he would be listening in as he always was, and the glint of recognition that crossed his face confirmed my suspicions.
"Emmett, do you mind if Gabrielle and I go for a quick walk?" Edward asked a wary Emmett.
He is so protective…it's kinda cute.
"She and I have a conversation that is long overdue. I promise to return her to you safely as soon as we're done."
"I'm ok with it if she is." Emmett answered as he kissed my temple gently and unwrapped himself from me. I could feel the loss of his contact immediately and almost decided not to talk this out with Edward just to have the chance to stay wrapped up in my Emmie-bear.
"I'm ok with it… we need to hash this out already. Let's get to walking, spanky" I quipped as I started off in the direction of our dorm. "We'll meet up with you guys in our suite in a few minutes" I called back over my shoulder as Edward quickly caught up with me.
We fell into a slow comfortable stride as we walked across the dark, nearly silent campus. I knew I should have felt nervous about finally having it out with Edward over my rights to mental privacy, but I was strangely calm, like I knew it would all work out in the end.
"Ok, so instead of pretending we're talking this stroll for the hell of it, let's address the pink elephant in the room already, shall we?" I asked as an opener to the conversation. "Why is it that you feel you have a right to invade my private thoughts?"
"I'm not at all concerned with your private thoughts, trust me." He answered with a slight shudder and a knowing smirk.
Oh, someone has a sense of humor I see, I thought at him. His smile only grew wider.
"More than you know, actually." he responded to my silent communication.
"Then why do you want in my head so badly?" I was confused by his need to be so in tuned with me.
"Because it's how I protect my family, and I consider you part of my family now. It's not just a matter of hearing what you're thinking, but also of being able to locate you in a crowd. If I don't have practice tuning into your mental voice I can't locate you, I can't keep you safe." I could hear the exasperation in his voice, and I could tell that this inability to protect me was really getting to him.
"Ok, I can honestly say I never thought of it that way."
"Look, I get that it feels kind of intrusive at first, but I swear I try and tune out all of the really personal thoughts, I don't want that rolling around in my head, trust me" his eyes were pleading and for the first time I could see that this wasn't about winning for him at all. He was genuine in his need to make sure his family was safe, that I was safe.
"I'm warning you now that my head is filled with silly, inane, ridiculous thoughts at any given moment. I guess I just don't want you to look at me differently once you hear what goes on in here" I said as I tapped my temple to emphasize my point.
"I promise that you're not any more twisted than Emmett, and I've been listening to his mind for years." He said with a wink and a sly smirk.
I'd never really given much consideration to the possibility of Edward having a sense of humor. He always came across and serious and silent, but now I see that he may just be slightly less tight wound than I thought.
"Thanks" he replied sarcastically, earning a giggle from me.
I have to admit that this makes having conversations a little easier. I thought to him. I guess I can try.
"That's all I am asking" he said with a smile as he brought his arm around my shoulder and led me toward our dorm. It was a very brotherly gesture, and though I never had siblings, I felt that he would one day become my closest older brother. It was oddly comforting.
"You know, you remind me so much of Alice sometimes" he said as we were entering the main doors.
Ok I'll bite, why's that?
"Well, you both have more energy than anyone on the planet, and she resisted me being in her head at first also. But mostly because she's closest to me besides Bella. She and I have always been very close, and I think one day you and I will be too."
I smiled shyly at his admission. All this affection was new to me, and was kinda embarrassing me.
"So, now that you have decided to let me in, how about you tell me something about yourself? I don't want to read everything from your mind, I want a chance to get to know you on your terms as well." He offered. I could tell he was trying to find a compromise to help me with this situation, and it only made me like him more.
Umm…let me see… I started before he interrupted my train of thought.
"Gabrielle, you don't have to only talk to me in your mind. In fact, it might be best if you didn't, seeing as Emmett isn't nearly as comfortable with this as he lets on" he said, and I instantly felt guilty. It really was a very intimate way of communicating and I know I would be hurt if Emmett and some hot girl spoke to one another in hushed whispers and silent glances.
"Hot, huh?" he laughed as he nudged me with his shoulder. We had entered the main building and were sitting in a lounge area now on one of the many plush couches.
"Oh puh-lease! You know you're gorgeous, and I think it may have gone to your head a little" I said with a wink.
"Eh, I would rather not have the attention to be honest. You can't believe how perverse the minds of teenage girls are!" he exclaimed, and I blushed about 10 shades of scarlet. Oh I could totally believe how perverse a teenage girl's mind is.
"Hmm…I'm not going to touch that one. I doubt I need to know what you're thinking right now." He said with a laugh. His eyes crinkled at the corners and his smile was wide and joyful. I couldn't help but smile in return. "Besides, you must be used to the attention as well. I don't think I have to say it, but you are remarkably beautiful, even in vampire terms."
"Yeah, I am pretty much used to the stares, but what do you mean 'vampire-terms'?" I asked, not sure if it was a compliment or not.
"Well, as vampires, one of our many weapons is our inhuman beauty. Most humans are drawn to us over all others, but I have noticed in the thoughts of many of the males on this campus that have come across us that you feature heavily in their fantasies. More so than some of my female family members. Needless to say, that is a first." He finished with a look of mild amusement and a hint of confusion on his face.
"So I guess that this" I said gesturing to my face " is pretty damn special, huh?" and we both erupted into laughter.
"So, Gabrielle, what do you do for fun?"
"Um, I love to dance, I sing a little, though no one has ever heard me before. I play guitar, and I write a little music" I said, feeling comfortable and relaxed just talking with Edward.
"I didn't know you were musical" he responded.
"Eh, I'm mostly self taught, so I don't know how good I am, but I enjoy myself" I replied.
"Hmm… well maybe one day you can play for me and I'll let you know if you suck" he offered as he stood and reached to pull me up with him. "Let's head up and put poor Emmett out of his misery. I'm sure he thinks I've eaten you by now." The full smile was back on his face, and I found myself thinking less of his looks, and more of the way I felt comforted by seeing him so happy.
I'm glad we talked. I thought to him.
"Me too, kiddo" he replied. I was taken aback by the nickname, but I liked hearing it from him.
"Kiddo, huh?" I asked with a laugh.
"It's better than 'Gabs'" he said with an eye roll.
"Edward Cullen rolls his eyes? Alert the media!" I exclaimed as I took off in a run for the stairs to beat him to the girl's suite. Before I could take three steps he was looking down at me from the top of the stairs and laughing.
"Did you really think you could beat me? I am the fastest, you know" he said through his laughter.
"Yeah yeah yeah…rub it in why don't you." I said out of breath as I finally climbed the last flight of steps. "Stupid, sparkly, super-fast vampire" I grumbled as we walked down the hall. He laughed next to me as we reached the door and I could hear the laughter of the rest of the family inside as well.
"They totally heard all of that, didn't they?" I asked as Edward's eyes shown with the laughter he was trying to repress.
"Yes, us 'stupid, sparkly, super-fast vampires' also have excellent hearing" he said and I could hear Emmett's booming laugh as he exclaimed "That's my girl!"
I found myself drawn to the sound of Emmett's laughter and walked over to where he sat on the couch, taking in our exchange. I plopped myself down on his hard lap and snuggled into his cold chest, and breathed out a sigh of relief. This was easily my favorite place in the world, wrapped up in his strong arms.
"Mmm.. I missed you too babe" Emmett cooed into my ear as I wrapped my arms around his broad chest. "How did it go?" he whispered to me, more for my benefit than anything, since his family could hear every word of our conversation.
"Eh, so long as Eddie-boy doesn't go peeping in my private thoughts I guess I can let him in." I said in a normal speaking voice. No need to pretend for my benefit. There were no secrets among them, and the sooner I got used to that idea the better.
Alice giggled at Edward's expression from my new nickname for him. It was a mixture of disgust and humor.
Hm, there's that famous Edward Cullen sense of humor. I thought to him and I saw his eyes crinkle again with mirth.
"Alright, Kiddo…I'll stay out of your pervy thoughts" he said and the entire room erupted into laughter.
"OMG….dad did you just say 'pervy'?" Nessie asked through her full belly laugh. I couldn't help but smile at the scene before me. My family was sitting around the living area joking and laughing, and I felt overwhelmed with a sense of belonging. I was home, they were my home.