10.

The Christmas dinner was very nice. The Great Hall was decorated with huge Christmas trees thanks to Hagrid, the school choir sung Wizard and Muggle festive songs and the house elves outdid themselves with the food. The students were excited about going home, only a few of them stayed so only one or two professors were needed to supervise them during the break.

I wish I could have enjoyed the dinner but I have other things in my mind, well, mostly Severus. Minerva stood up and started to speak about Christmas and love and family and so on while I was sitting there, looking at the empty chair on my left side. I sighed and caressed the back of the seat with my fingers. I only realized that Minerva finished her speech when I heard her voice right next to me.

"You really miss him, don't you?"

I looked at her, she was smiling gently. I felt so alone. I pulled back my hand and nodded at the Headmistress.

"Do not worry, he will come back soon."

I became alerted.

"Have you heard anything about him?"

"I'm sorry, I haven't but I know that he will be fine. In no time he will be here again, in all his cynical and sarcastic glory."

I laughed a little.

"I hope you're right, Minerva. Thank you for your kind words."

"Try to enjoy this evening, Anna."

After dinner the whole staff retreated to the teachers' lounge for some wine and firewhiskey although around midnight I was the only one who was still there. I wasn't too tired but more like numb. I didn't feel going anywhere just sitting by the fire with my feet propped up on an armchair watching the flames. I was barefoot because I was fed up with my high heeled shoes. I was wearing a dark green fitted silk robe which reached to my knees with a nice not-so-low-but-still-remarkable neckline. I looked good but no one was there to notice.

I was thinking of Severus. I knew that he did bad things during the war and I knew that he was a Death Eater. I also knew that he killed Dumbledore and I also knew that he was a spy endangering his own life for the sake of the wizarding world. He was a hero, he has to be because the Wizengamot let him free and Minerva trusted him. And even Dumbledore trusted him. I just didn't know the exact reason for his deeds. I wished he would tell me.

I drank the rest of my wine, put down the glass, leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes. I tried to relax.

"Wouldn't it be more appropriate if you would sleep in your bed, Professor?"

I opened my eyes and before I could take a look at the visitor, I jumped up and ran to him. I brought my arms around his neck and buried my head in the spot where his shoulder meet his neck.

"Severus…"

He put his arms around my back and pulled me to him as close as possible. He also held me because I had to stand on my tiptoes.

"I'm so glad you're here!"

"Me too, Anna."

We were standing there for a few minutes before I pulled back. I grabbed his hand and pulled him to the fire. He took of his cloak and we sat down in the armchairs. Our legs were very close.

"Did they let you go?"

His face was more relaxed than the last time I saw him.

"Yes."

I felt happy tears in my eyes. No, Anna, no, you won't cry before him. Stop being so sentimental, really.

"God, this is great! You can't imagine how relieved I am!"

He chuckled. How I missed his voice!

"I think I can."

"Ok, yes, you're right. And… now… can you live free?"

His expression changed. It was more gloomy now.

"Yes, I am now free."

Alright, it was time for my confession. I had to tell him exactly how I feel. I took his hand again. It was soft and pale and even my long fingers looked tiny in his hand.

"Severus"

"Anna"

We started to talk at the same time and stopped simultaneously.

"I'm listening, Severus." I gave him a reassuring smile.

He didn't look at me, he was gazing at the rug beneath our feet.

"I have to tell you something about me. I just don't know how." He stopped a little, took a sigh and continued. "Are you going home for the break?"

"Yes."

"I'll figure it out until your return."

I nodded and squeezed his hand. It was so nice sitting there with him, holding hands but I saw that he was very exhausted.

"Let's go to our rooms, you need to sleep."

I put on my shoes, he grabbed his cloak but he didn't release my hand. We walked through the corridors hand in hand. When we reached the paintings, I turned to him. I don't know who was the first to move but in the next moment I find myself kissing him and he kissing me. He released my hand and pulled me closer. My hands were in his hair. It was silky soft just how I imagined. Our kiss was tentative at the start but in a few seconds it got more passionate. I felt his tongue grazing my lips and I immediately opened my mouth, pushing my tongue through his lips. I heard a deep moan coming from him and I was screaming with joy in my head. He wanted me. He really wanted me. Sadly, after a few minutes we needed some air. When we pulled back, we didn't release each other. His hands were on the small of my back, mines were on his neck. There was only a dim light on the corridor but I could say that his lips were red and puffy from the kiss.

"I am leaving tomorrow, after breakfast. Would you accompany me to the gates?"

He smiled.

"Of course." His voice was husky and rough. "Good night!"

"Sleep tight!" After one last kiss we retreated to our respective rooms.

When I stepped in my bedroom, I was immensely happy but then I remembered. He wanted to tell me something and according to his expression and his posture, it wasn't a good thing. My happiness faded and I anxiety started to crawl in my heart.

Did you think that the angsty part is over? Well, no, life's not THAT easy :)

Thank you for your kind reviews and let me know what you think!