AN: Yeah.. here's chapter eleven! Enjoy! Thanks again for all the comments! You guys are awesome!

"…This is boring," Temari stated bluntly. The genius across from her said nothing, but instead picked up a wooden piece and moved it on the board. "Is this what you do in your free time? Play Shougi?"

"Yup," Shikamaru answered simply as he averted his eyes out the window. "Hey look, it's a pineapple shaped cloud. I've never seen one of those before."

"—I mean really Shikamaru, there are just so many things you can—"

"Oh! An apple! Hmmm…I'm not sure if that's an orange or Lee's head…looks more like Lee's head, but a bit smaller."

"—Girls go for guys that play sports, not nerdy games like Shougi and Go! That's why you're at the bottom of the social pyramid, you know—"

"Woah, is that a snow cone? Cool…Hey, a porcupine! …Or is that Naruto's head?"

"—You're never going to get a girlfriend if all you ever do is sit on your ass and play board games. You are one socially retarded kid—"

"…Is that a SOCK?"

"Shikamaru!"

"What!?" he grunted, irritated that his cloud-watching had been interrupted.

"Were you even listening to a word I was saying?!"

"…Something about socks and pineapples?"

"…You're not socially retarded; you're socially disabled." He shrugged indifferently, much to her annoyance. "Moron!" she hissed, picking up a shougi piece and throwing it at her partner. He held the same passive look even as the piece hit him square between the eyes.

---

"She's so perfect for him!" Yoshino gushed.

"The Nara men are cursed with frightening women," Shikaku thought disdainfully.

---

"Maaahh calm down," Shikamaru grumbled as he rubbed the spot where he was hit.

"Nara Shikamaru, my grades are in the toilet as is; I will NOT fail this assignment just because YOU are a LAZYASS!" Temari shrieked.

"It's barely a couple weeks into the year and you're failing?"

"SHUT UP." She hissed.

Mutual chills ran up and down Shikamaru and Shikaku's backs.

"Troublesome." Shikamaru thought while Temari went on a ranting spree.

"Men! They're such a pain! All they ever do is whine and complain and sit on their asses all day! If they're not getting fat watching TV they're—"

"Man…The clouds sure are nice," Shikamaru thought as he turned his attention back to the sky.

"—And even when they're just SITTING THERE they have to ask the women to get THEM the control or a beer! PIGS! All men are whiny, lazy, fu—"

"I wish I was a cloud…They're so free…No worries about anything…They just float around all day…Yeah…Clouds are lucky…They don't have to deal with anything troublesome…Especially women."

"I Swear! They can't ever do anything unless their lives depend on it! And even then they get women to do all the god damn—"

"Is she still ranting? Man she's just as bad as 'Kaa-san. Women are so troublesome."

"STOP TUNING ME OUT!" Shikamaru snapped out of his reverie just in time to see the Shougi board flying right at him.

"Ku!" The board smacked him right dab in the face, causing him to fall onto his back. "Oww…"

"Idiot!"

---

"She's worse than Yoshino when she gets mad…" Shikaku thought.

"…She's pretty frightening…but that's just the kind of woman Shikamaru needs!" Yoshino giggled.

"…Poor boy." Shikaku thought sympathetically.

---

Tenten and Neji groaned as the phone began to ring for the tenth time that hour. "Your uncle needs a life," Tenten stated bluntly.

"You don't need to tell me that," He grumbled as he walked over to where the phone was hooked up and pulled it out, successfully cutting off the ringing.

"We have six other phones in this house."

"Then I guess we won't be leaving this room."

Tenten sweatdropped. "Why is Hiashi-san spazzing? Shouldn't he be checking up on Hinata instead? Considering the fact that she's his daughter."

"Oh, he has two phones for occasions like this. When your phone isn't ringing he's calling Hinata-sama." Neji informed.

"…No offense or anything, but your uncle's a freak."

Neji merely nodded in agreement, cringing as the phone rang again, and Tenten's mom picked it up. "Neji-san!" she called from down the hall, "IT's your uncle! Can you please ask him to stop calling?"

---

"How can it even survive after crying for this long?" Kiba questioned over the noise of the baby's bawling.

"It's a doll!" Natsu reminded, "It doesn't need to breathe and can therefore cry non-stop for all of eternity."

Kiba sweatdropped, "I will NEVER have kids…"

"Can't you get it to shut up?" Tsume complained, coming down the stairs.

"We've been trying!" Kiba complained.

Tsume shook her head, retreating back upstairs to get her earplugs.

"Give it to meee!!" Hana finally sobbed, snatching the doll out of her younger brother's arms and rocking it back and forth as the baby immediately calmed down and began to coo.

"How'd you do that?!" Natsu asked in awe.

Hana shrugged, handing the baby back to Natsu.

"It's kinda cute when it's not crying!" Natsu thought, looking down at the baby. Just as she thought that, the baby threw up on her shirt. "I take that back…" She stared at the goop on her shirt for a moment before handing the baby to Kiba and scurrying away to change shirts.

---

"N-Naruto-kun…What are you doing to the baby?" Hinata asked.

Naruto simply grinned as he held out the doll that was now wearing an orange jumpsuit and a blonde wig. "Naruto Junior needed something to express his individuality!" he explained cheerfully.

"Naruto! Go to your driving test!" his father called from down the hall.

Naruto blinked, "Oh! Right! I forgot that was this weekend! C'mon Hinata!" he said dragging the shy girl along after him.

His father sweatdropped, noting the abandoned baby on the couch, "Don't be like your father…" he advised picking the doll up with a sigh.

"Yes!" Naruto exclaimed happily. "I've got Kakashi-sensei! All he does is read his book! I'm sure to pass this time!"

Hinata sat in the back of the car, tentatively rocking back and forth, "I'm too young to dieee…"

Sure enough, a few minutes into the test, Naruto had demolished three stop signs, collided with two cars, and ended the life of a family of six squirrels.

Completely engulfed in his reading, Kakashi noticed none of this and only murmured passages from his beloved orange book.

Hinata meanwhile, had her eyes closed tightly.

"Yes! I'm going to pass!" Naruto thought excitedly. Just as he thought that, an old lady walked into the middle of the street, right in front of Naruto's car. "Oh my ramen!" he exclaimed, quickly swerving out of the way.

"…And then Leopold said to Meriwether…" was Kakashi's only response to the situation at hand.

The car collided with the one next to it, creating a chain reaction, which eventually led to the largest car accident in the history of the world.

The impact caused Kakashi's book to fly out the window. "HOLY PORN!" He screeched, diving out of the window after it.

"Kakash-sensei! What about my grade!" Naruto wailed.

After the police came and cleared the accident for the most part, a very bandaged Kakashi was carried by on a medical stretcher, next to a much smaller stretcher carrying a torn orange book. "You fail!" Kakashi said simply before being carried away.

"NOOOOO!!" Naruto screeched . "I'll never get my license at this rate!"

"Good!" Kakashi called from his stretcher, "Book killer!"

Interrupting Naruto's sulking, Hinata's phone began to ring, signaling her father calling…again.

---

Haku proceeded to rock back and forth in a fetal position in the corner of his room. "Soo…much…spandex…AND bad hair!!!"

"Here comes Leeeee!!" The energetic boy called.

"OH MY HAIR! NOOOOO!!!" Haku wailed inwardly, rocking back and forth more frantically.

"BEHOLD OUR YOUTHFUL BUNDLE OF YOUTH!" Lee exclaimed, dancing into the room with a spandex-clad baby. Upon entering the room, Lee began to shuffle his feet in a moon walk.

"God, why do you hate me so? What did I do to deserve this? Why? WHY?"

"Lee! I can see that you are still full of the springtime of youth!"

Haku's eyebrow twitched. "That voice…It can't be…"

"GAI-SENSEI!" At Lee's rejoice, Haku screeched shrilly while jumping into the air. "I thought you weren't going to come over until dinner!"

"Why. Is. HE. Here?!" Haku shrieked inwardly, his back pressed against the wall. "It's the attack of the EYEBROWS!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

Shivers running up and down his spine, Haku could almost swear that he saw the baby jumping up to rejoice with Gai and Lee.

---

"No! Zetsu, you're holding it wrong!" Deidara hissed as he snatched the crying doll out of his friend's arms. The blonde began to rock it back and forth, cooing it.

"You're just making it worse!" Zetsu snapped, glaring at him.

"here, give it to me!" Sasori grabbed the baby and held it calmly. And thus, it immediately stopped bawling. "Morons."

"Sasori and I were the only ones in the class that aced the assignment!" Deidara sang.

"…It's kinda creepy how he's so good at that." Kaiya grumbled, face-faulting.

"He has ten younger brothers and sisters," Sasuke answered simply, shrugging.

"Really?"

Before Sasuke could respond, Hidan went flying through the kitchen door and onto the table in front of them. "Hidan, you moron! 'Kaa-san paid six-thousand ryou for that coffee table!" Itachi scolded.

"Kuuu…" Hidan grunted painfully, wincing as he sat up. "Kira, you fucking bitch! 'The hell's your problem?!"

"You're my damn problem you bag of shit!" the feminine voice hissed. A young woman stalked out of the kitchen, dark eyes narrowed. A white lily was tucked behind her ear in her shoulder-length blue hair. "I should castrate you!"

Hands flying down to protect his pride, he scowled. "Just 'cause I mixed up the sugar and the nutmeg…"

"I'm allergic to nutmeg you crumblefuck!"

"And why would I know that!?"

"I've known you for SIXTEEN YEARS!"

'You're an idiot," Kakuzo snerked from his spot on the couch.

"Fuck you," Hidan sneered.

"Dammit, you got it crying again!" Kisame growled as he clamped his hands over his ears.

"Can't we just toss it out?!" Kabuto questioned, cringing at the obnoxious crying.

"No!" Kaiya and Sasuke chimed in unison, glaring at the silver-haired male.

"Okay, ok…I never knew you were the protective type, Sasuke." With a sharp glare from the dark-haired junior, Kabuto immediately shut up.

---

"CHOOOOUJIIII!!!"

Chouji and Couza shared a shudder at the platinum blonde's shriek.

"CHOOOOUJI!!!"

"I think you should go now before she really hurts you," Chouza whispered to his son.

Chouji shook his head vigorously. "No way…! Next time you see me, you won't be able recognize me!"

"CHOOOOOOOOOUJIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!"

Chouza clamped a hand over Chouji's mouth as a pair of sandal-clad feet were seen through the bottom of the door.

A huff was heard. "Where could that moron have gone?" Ino scowled. Receiving no answer, she walked past the closet.

They let out a small sigh of relief once they were certain that she was gone. "Too close," They murmured.

"Oh! Fujiko-san! Have you seen Chouji?"

"I think I saw him looking for something in the closet with Chouza."

"Thanks!" Father and son visibly tensed as the door was slowly pulled open. "Chouji…"

His eye twitched at the deadly look on her face. "Oh! H-hey Ino…"

---

By the time night had fallen, Sakura was ready to bash her head in with a bottle. The whole day, the WHOLE day she had spent with him, he had only said four words: "Give me the baby."

"I've only been here for a couple weeks and I've spoken more than him! What a socially retarded FREAK!" she thought as she flipped through the channels of the living room TV. "I've heard WALLS talk more than him!"

"Saaakura!" Tsunade sang from the kitchen. "Dinner's almost readddy!! Will you and Gaaaaara-kun come to the kiiiiiiitchen now?"

"Oh God, she's definitely tipsy," Sakura concluded grimly. "Of all the nights to go out on a date, Shizune-san had to pick today!"

"Saaaaaakura-chaaaan!"

"Eh, we better hurry before the kitchen explodes…" She stood up to head to the kitchen, but before she walked in, she saw Gaara tucking the baby into its carrier. "I swear he's going to have at least ten kids when he's older…I feel bad for his wife."

AN: Don't you feel bad for the poor kiddies of konoha high in the Independent Living class? xD