A/N: Another chapter and another apology for the delay – RL and all that. To make it up to you, this chapter is BIG!
As usual, this story would not look half so good without the time and devotion of my beta, Terri, Beans827. She takes commas out when I overcompensate and adds them in where they should be. Plus she tells me when I am going off the plot point and asks interesting questions like "were fire engines red back in the 1920's which sends me off to google heaven to check these things out. Btw, yes they were!
Chapter 11 – Radiant
Go, song, on wings wind-blown,
And tell her with thy art;
A joyous light has shown
Within my faithful heart.
Cast out with sainted ray,
Love's shadows all have fled;
Within my heart is day,
Pride, fear, and doubt, are dead.
Long silent, dumb, and dark,
Hearest thou? The gladness rings
Like the swift-winged lark,
That in the clear sky sings.
Go then, my song, today,
Thy voice she'll not disdain.
Welcomed, she'll bid thee stay,
Since you return again
(Paul Verlaine, "Go, Song, On Wings, Wind-Blown", translation of Va, chanson, a tire-d'aile )
From Chapter 10-
We were nearing the dance floor then so I promised to tell her whatever she wanted to know tomorrow as I just wanted to hold her in my arms once again. Liz smiled at me in agreement as we reached the edge of the floor. The band chose that moment to commence playing a waltz and I swept Liz into my arms and we whirled around the floor, my arms wrapped around her and her sweet body pressed to mine.
Chicago - August 1927
Dancing the waltz with Elizabeth was infinitely different from the way I felt when Esme was teaching me to dance a few years ago. Esme, in human years, was not too much older than me. In fact, when we arrived in Rochester not too long ago, we presented ourselves as brother and sister. Esme's hair was a rich caramel color and was not too dissimilar in shade to mine, I guess.
My feelings towards her were a combination of how I expect I would feel for a stepmother or a big sister. I had felt nothing more than familial affection when I had held her in my arms as she taught me to dance.
Dancing with Elizabeth was like nothing I had ever known before. My entire body was alive with an electric charge where we touched. Her slender fingers gathered in my hand, the warmth of her hand burning through the material of my jacket and shirt, all the way through to my sensitive skin beneath. The soft warmth of her cheek resting against the cold skin of my neck, her generous breasts occasionally brushing against my chest, the inside of my thigh against her hip as I led her around the floor.
Every sense I possessed was attuned to every nuance of her breath, every tiny movement she made, every thought running through her mind. So much so that all the other voices in my head were muted and all I could hear was her thoughts and her infinite joy at being held in my arms again.
I leaned down slightly and brushed my lips against her ear as I whispered, "Elizabeth, in all these years we have been apart, you were always embedded in my heart and soul, waiting for me to find you again. For the first time in nine long years, I know why I am alive, if that's what I am. I exist for you, and only you, Liz. You are my life now."
Elizabeth gasped at my words, turning her face up to mine. Her soulful eyes were full of shimmering tears, in contrast to the brilliant smile lighting her face. Her hand lifted from my shoulder and cupped lightly against my cheek. "Edward, you make me so happy. You always have. From the minute I met you outside of the library all those years ago, I have been drawn to you. The look in your eyes that tells me that I am special and the merest touch of your fingers spark when they meet mine. I am yours, Edward. I have been, and always will be, now and forever."
"Forever," I murmur, my mind reeling with the implications of that statement. If I was human, our future would have been simple. It would have meant marriage, children, growing old together and eventually death. But, forever for me was something so very different. Forever literally was forever, far into the foreseeable future and beyond. Did Elizabeth mean my forever or her human one?
My mind was distracted with these questions and I almost failed to take note that the band had finished the set and were taking a break. Reluctantly, I released Elizabeth from within my arms as we made our way back to the table, already missing the warmth of her body surrounding me.
As we sat down, I gathered her hand in mine, not able to abandon the closeness I felt by her touch. I was hungry for any connection to her whatsoever. Now that I had found her, I found it difficult to keep any boundaries between us. I instinctively reached out to her mind and her body, as if she was necessary for my continued existence.
Although I was close to both Carlisle and Esme, I did not automatically crave their touch and did not often hug them. In fact, I tended to be rather reserved and unapproachable. Obviously, being around humans had been difficult for me until a few years previously, however, even around other nomadic vampires we had come across, I had kept my distance. Elizabeth had effectively walked straight through all of the barriers I had erected around me as easily as if they had been made of spun sugar.
I was startled out of my thoughts by the waiter clearing his throat at my side. I glanced up at him and by the way his eyebrow lifted in disdain and the smirk playing around his mouth, I had been inattentive to my surroundings for longer than I realized. Ignoring the waiter for the moment, I encouraged Elizabeth to order two desserts so that she could try a little from both. She readily agreed and her eyes twinkled with delight when the sweet confections were placed in front of us at the table.
I thought that dancing closely with Elizabeth was dangerous for my recently awakened libido, however, I realized that everything Elizabeth did, including the simple act of eating dessert, awakened feelings in me that I couldn't remember having had before.
First case in point, Elizabeth moaned when she took the first bite of her baked cheesecake. Yes, moaned. That low sultry sound caused me to swell in my pants again, powerless to stop my mind conjuring up possible future scenarios where I was making love to her and causing that glorious sound. Then, she tilted her head back and I could see her throat working as she swallowed, before slowly licking her lips again. I groaned softly, licking my own lips in response. I must have been staring at her covetously because she laughed and waved her spoon towards me.
"Edward, you look like you really want some of this cheesecake. Would you like a mouthful?"
I nodded without realizing what I was agreeing to, and before I gathered my wits about me, Elizabeth had scooped up a spoonful of the sweet goo and pressed the spoon between my lips. Although my first thought was to gag on the disgusting food, I held my breath and licked the spoon, my eyes never leaving Elizabeth's. As my tongue had flicked out, her eyes followed the motion. Her breathing quickened and her mind strayed to the kisses we had shared in the meadow yesterday and the feel of my tongue in her mouth.
At the direction of her thoughts, I moaned around the spoon. As Elizabeth's eyes flickered between my eyes and my tongue, her thoughts leapt unbidden to wondering what my tongue would feel like licking and sucking on her nipples. My breath caught and I sucked in the rest of the goo, straight to the back of my throat. In all of a split second, I gagged, bit down on the spoon, snapping it in two and dropped my eyes to appreciate the swell of Elizabeth's breasts hidden beneath her glittering dress, all the while thinking about what it would feel like to lick them.
Elizabeth's gasp as her hands lifted to cover her eyes while her mind came to the realization that I knew exactly what she was thinking, brought me out of my stupor. Quickly I lifted my napkin from the table and coughed discreetly, dislodging the disgusting dessert from the back of my throat. I wiped the spoon clean and deposited the remains in my pocket, to hide the evidence.
My hands reached out to pull Elizabeth's free from her eyes, but she dipped her head in embarrassment. I leaned closer and tilted her chin up so that her fire engine red face was in view. As much as my gift helped me in many situations, I was coming to realize that it was the cause of a great inequity between Elizabeth and myself. Where I was privy to her every thought, her dreams and desires, she was limited to know only what I deemed suitable to tell her or gauge something of my feelings from my actions or facial expressions.
To right the imbalance between us that my gift inadvertently caused, I knew I would have to verbally bare my soul to her, no matter how difficult it was for me to do so. My ingrained sense of propriety and my need to treat Elizabeth as a lady, warred with my knowledge that she would pull away from me if she thought I was in any way appalled at the direction of her intimate thoughts.
"I've been wondering the same thing myself," I blurted out quickly, before I could change my mind. If it were possible for a vampire to blush, I would be as red as Elizabeth had been moments before.
I was rewarded with the knowledge that I had made the right decision when Elizabeth breathed a sigh of relief at my words.
"You have?" she whispered, the redness in her cheeks dissipating slowly.
I nodded. "Probably more than I should," I whispered back, stroking her hand over and over with my thumb.
"How much is too much?" said the little minx, revelling in my unexpected disclosure.
Hmm…how much should I actually tell her before she thought I was a pervert? I didn't want to scare her off with the number of times my mind actually drifted to thoughts of touching her naked body with my fingers, my tongue, and her most intimate of places, with mine. Let alone how occupied I became with thoughts of her delicate warm fingers touching me. I reached out my hand and dropped my napkin in my lap in an effort to hide the effect this conversation was having on my nether regions.
Unsure of the appropriateness of the subject matter on a first date, I reminded myself of my decision to create equality between us, comforting myself that Elizabeth's thoughts had roamed to the sexual feelings between us also.
"Every time I am near you, the feel of your skin on mine, the scent of your hair and your natural perfume plot against my body; thoughts of how it would feel to touch you, to taste you, to take you, flood my mind. "
A harsh intake of breath from Elizabeth caused a frisson of fear to run down my spine. Had I told her too much? Did she think me immoral and depraved for the way my thoughts ran to physical pleasures? But no, the thunderous beat of her heart, the distinct scent of her arousal and her mind all rejoiced that we were both feeling the same effects from the proximity of the other.
I was saved from further disclosure just then by the waiter returning to take away our plates and cutlery and depositing the folder with our handwritten account on the table in front of me. I picked up the leather folder with something akin to desperation and deposited the appropriate notes, before placing it back on the table for collection.
"We need to get back to the car so that I can get you home at the time I promised your parents," I told Elizabeth as I rose to my feet. She nodded in agreement, as reluctant as I was to end the evening so soon. Elizabeth stood as I moved her chair back. While the palm of my hand rested on her back, I guided her through the restaurant to collect our coats from the hatcheck girl.
The night had grown considerably cooler since we had arrived at the restaurant and I hurried Elizabeth back to my car to get out of the chilled air. As we sat in the car, with the engine running to warm up, I took her gloved fingers in mine and asked if she would accompany me to the Art Gallery in the morning.
Elizabeth didn't answer for a moment as she pondered what to say to me. She wanted to go but her family always attended church each Sunday. I jumped in to avoid her any further upset and asked if she would mind if I came with her and her family to church and then we could go to the gallery after.
That damn movie! Now Elizabeth had visions of me accidently getting sprayed with holy water and exploding in a poof of dust.
"I don't think that is a good idea, Edward. Can a vampire even enter a church?"
I chuckled and Elizabeth tried to push me in my chest where she encountered my immovability. "It's not funny, Edward," she huffed and pouted.
"Yes it is, Elizabeth. I will be perfectly safe inside of the church. Holy water and crosses have no more effect on me than they do on you. It's actually extremely difficult to kill a vampire; we are immortal after all."
The drive to Elizabeth's home on the outskirts of town took no time at all and as we pulled up at the end of the long drive, I turned to her again and reminded her that she had yet to answer my question.
"Oh, of course, Edward. If it's not dangerous for you to be in a church, I would love for you to come with my family and me. If I meet you out front with my parents, we can go straight to the gallery after, if you'd like?" Elizabeth smiled shyly at me and I nodded my agreement.
I unenthusiastically exited the car and rounded the vehicle to open her door for her and escort her to the front door. I was not looking forward to leaving her and going back to my lonely hotel room. The long hours until I would be reunited with her again seemed like an eternity to me now, whereas before she came back into my life, whole weeks could pass me by as if they were barely a minute.
I saw the twitch of a curtain in the living room and the satisfied thoughts of Elizabeth's father for bringing his daughter home before the time I specified we would return. He was congratulating himself for his intuition about my gentlemanly demeanor and my upstanding behaviour. I had to bite my tongue to resist laughing as he considered "Anthony" much more favorably than his deceased cousin, Edward, who, in his opinion, had been too young and irresponsible and quite frankly, a bit of a dreamer for wanting to get married at 17.
Elizabeth peered at me when I couldn't contain a quiet snort escaping at the tone of her father's thoughts. She snickered when I whispered, "Your father thinks your taste in men has improved from that youngster, Edward."
Our amusement was short lived when Elizabeth's father cleared his throat from behind the door, signalling an end to our perfect evening. I leaned closer and whispered that I had had a wonderful time and couldn't wait to see her in the morning before closing the gap between us and sealing the perfectness of the evening with a brush of my lips against hers. Elizabeth's pulse jumped at the brief touch while her fingers lifted to trace over the tingling in her lips.
Just as Elizabeth was about to enter the house, she called back to me that she would meet me at 9am at the Lake View Presbyterian Church on West Addison Street. With a wide smile, she disappeared from my view while I despondently started back towards my car. Elizabeth's thoughts stopped my descent into gloom in its tracks.
"I love you, Edward."
My dead heart fluttered back to life as a consequence of her words, and a joy I was unused to feeling burst within my chest. Today was the first day, in nine very long and lonely years, that I had forgotten for brief moments what I had become. Today, I had just been a man, out on a date with the woman who had captured his heart and soul in her small dainty hands.
A burst of pure happiness welled up inside me as I relived the evening. As I approached the car, I uncharacteristically hopped in the air and tapped my heels together as if I was Fred Astaire in a Broadway show. At the muffled burst of laughter emanating from the house, my concentration vanished and I lost my footing as I stepped up into the car, smacking my nose on the side mirror, smashing it.
Self-consciously I peered back towards the house, hoping that the laughter had nothing to do with my actions and that no-one had seen my unintended vaudeville comedy show. Luck was not with me however; I spied three amused faces peering out of the curtains at me and laughing uproariously. Like any comedy act, I took my bow at the end of my show and unceremoniously drove off with the sound of mirth filling my ears for many a mile.
I had only been away from her for mere minutes and I felt the separation keenly. It felt like there was an invisible cord connecting us, pulsing and contracting, pulling us toward each other until we became one. I almost gave in to the force of my feelings. It would be so easy to turn the car around and then slip up to her room; we need not be parted for one minute more.
Shockingly, my foot had eased back on the accelerator and the car had started to slow before I collected the wayward direction of my thoughts. Elizabeth would be shocked and horrified at the sight of me invading her private chamber, I was sure. Well, reasonably sure, as the delicious memory of Elizabeth's vivid thoughts of my lips on hers plotted against my resolve.
With great difficulty, I resisted my baser impulses and returned to the hotel. I questioned just how I was going to get through the next 10 hours without her by my side. How swiftly she had become insinuated into every aspect of my life to the point that I could no longer imagine being in this world without her. The last nine years of my life now seemed insignificant and unimportant because she had not been a part of it. They were merely stepping stones leading me back to her.
I toyed with the idea of sending a telegram to Carlisle and Esme telling them that my return would be delayed indefinitely, however, I had been gone barely a few weeks, which was truly nothing in the scheme of a vampire life.
Once Elizabeth and I had matters more settled between us, I would send a telegram informing them of our plans. I didn't see the need to tell them about Elizabeth just yet, mainly because I was pretty sure Esme would have wanted to come here, and I wasn't yet ready to share Elizabeth with anyone, even my newly acquired parents.
After pacing back and forth in the hotel room for hours, eventually I picked up a book that Carlisle had given to me some time ago, The Voyages of Dr Doolittle. He had laughed as he had handed it to me, telling me that I had a lot in common with the good doctor. Not really in the mood for reading, but hoping to fill in some more time, I had only read a few pages before I got Carlisle's attempt at humor. I could hear humans and Doolittle could hear animals. Secretly, I often thought that the two were sometimes not that far apart.
As in all things, vampires had superior sight as well as an enhanced capacity to take in vast amounts of knowledge in record time. It didn't take long and I was finishing the book in less than ten minutes. I picked up my book of Verlaine poetry and skimmed through some of my favorites, having decided on sharing some with Elizabeth later in the day.
Finally, I slipped the book into my pocket and although I had earlier decided against it, I left the hotel and sped through the dark streets to sit beneath Elizabeth's window, my legs drawn up and my chin resting on my knees. I breathed in her distinct scent of freesias and strawberries and listened to the regular thrumming of her heart and, at last, I was content.
I toyed briefly with the idea of climbing the tree outside of her window just to see her sleeping in her bed but thought that might be just a touch perverted. I wasn't sure how Elizabeth would feel about me watching her sleep but the idea of it fascinated me. Out of all my former human activities, I think that was the one I missed the most and I envied Elizabeth her ability to do so. Oh to be able to sleep and just shut down from the day and be recharged upon awakening. Not that I ever got tired per se, just a little jaded and worn from time to time.
Before the sun had risen and the day started in earnest, I reluctantly left my post beneath Elizabeth's window and returned to the hotel. The minute hand on the clock in the hotel room seemed to stand still as I paced the floor some more, waiting for the time prescribed by Elizabeth to meet.
I freshened up in the bathroom. One minute closer. Rifled through my purchases on the bed and selected what I would wear today. Another minute ticked over. Got dressed and paced some more. Two more minutes and counting. Changed my mind about what I was wearing, took everything off except for my shorts and selected instead my dark grey worsted suit, white collared shirt and navy blue and red diagonally striped tie. Three minutes down and I had dressed ridiculously slowly.
I heard a quiet knock at the door and the crackle of paper hitting the floor. When I opened the door, I found the daily newspaper laid out on the carpet in front of me. Enthusiastically, I grabbed the paper, dropped into the armchair beside the window and flicked it open to read the headlines of the day. It wouldn't hurt, I decided, to be current with the affairs around town, in case Elizabeth's father engaged me in conversation today. Usually, human events barely registered with me unless they concerned the investments Carlisle and I had made, however, I wanted to appear as normal as possible with the Swanson family. It was important to me that they liked and approved of me.
With my vampire vision, the news of the day and the trivial things, for that matter, only took a few minutes to read. I threw the paper aside and my leg jiggled in impatience. The urge to be within touching distance of Elizabeth was unlike anything I had ever felt before. It was as if being separated from each other was wrong and unnatural. I felt like my entire body was being pulled towards hers and resisting that urge was becoming increasingly difficult.
I had envisioned that getting to know her again, and for her to know me, would take months before I was ready to take the next step. I was wrong. I finally recognized what my heart and soul had known immediately, that she was my other half, my reason for being on this earth. That first day something drew me through the forest, to reconnect with her.
My brain had taken only a little bit longer to catch up. What I thought was idle curiosity when I heard her voice sultrily singing in the forest and the physical reaction to her beauty, was, in fact, the calling of her soul and mine answering.
I had never felt this way before. The breathy pitch of Elizabeth's singing voice mesmerized me but truthfully there were far more pitch perfect singers out there. In fact, the voices of female vampires resembled the ringing of bells. But yet, not once had these other voices called to me like hers. The Denali sisters, close friends of Carlisle's and now mine, were more classically beautiful than Elizabeth, but not once had my body responded to them as it did to hers.
Plainly speaking, there were no doubts in my mind that Elizabeth was made for me and I for her.
I hoped that Elizabeth was feeling the same way since I was suddenly impatient to be with her in every way possible, never to be separated again. With that thought in mind, I hesitated no longer and strode from my room, out onto the street and towards the church to meet with my love.
I may have been a little overeager; thank goodness it was early, as I somehow arrived at my destination a half hour ahead of time. No one but a gardener, tending the small patch of grass and meagre garden in the grounds, was around.
Not wanting to stick out like the proverbial sore thumb, I wandered a little further up the road and was very happy to find a store selling musical instruments. What caught my eye immediately was a glossy black piano in the window. I would love to play for Elizabeth again. Hopefully the owner of the store would let me play later in the week. For days now, a melody inspired by Elizabeth, had been running through my mind and I was dying to try out.
I wandered a bit further and finally it was time to return to the Church to meet Elizabeth and her family. As I stood near the front gate, the other arrivals watched me somewhat suspiciously. There was a varied range of thoughts running through the minds of the people mingling on the front lawn. Some of the young women were a little forthright in their thoughts about my body and not a few of the older women as well. The men in the group mainly felt distrust of a lone man, unknown to them, amongst their tight knit community.
I felt increasingly uncomfortable and shifted restlessly with my head averted, anxiously awaiting the arrival of the Swansons. When I felt a tingle start low in my spine and move swiftly up to my scalp, I knew immediately that it signalled an awareness of the other half of me approaching. I felt it moments before I heard her thoughts, then caught a trace of her distinctive scent and finally spotted her beautiful face in the small crowd approaching. My body seemed to know when she was anywhere near, as if it was acutely attuned to the one person who was meant only for me. Of that I was sure.
I smiled in relief with the Swanson family's appearance at the Church gate and moved toward them gratefully. I approached Charles first and shook his hand trying hard to be circumspect around his daughter in front of him, when all I wanted to do was touch her, connect with her in any way possible.
I noticed Charles had to work hard to stifle a smirk as he remembered my less than graceful exit from his home the previous evening. He was secretly glad for my clumsy eagerness. It had been a very long time since he had heard the tinkling laugh of his oldest daughter. My obvious happiness at the end of our "first" date boded well, he thought, for an eagerly awaited wedding. Thankfully with his mind otherwise occupied he only briefly wondered at the fact that my hands were freezing again.
"Anthony, it is so good to see you again so soon," Mary Swanson's kind words were echoed in her mind. Mrs Swanson had such a sweet temperament and she was genuinely happy to see me again. Her mind was filled with thoughts of the little chat that she and Elizabeth had had last night and I was hard pressed not to dart my eyes to Elizabeth's when Mary revealed in her thoughts the words that had passed between them after she had returned from our date.
I took Mary's outstretched gloved hands in mine and squeezed gently in acknowledgement. Finally, Mary moved on and Elizabeth moved towards me. I felt suddenly shy after all my revelations from the previous evening as well as Mary's thoughts of her conversation with Elizabeth. I was ecstatic, for somehow, Elizabeth's mind had reached the same conclusion as mine had. She had relayed the evening's events to her mother and after much prodding by her mother, admitted breathlessly that she thought she had found her soul mate and that she was in love.
As I took her hand in mine, I couldn't help but smile widely at Elizabeth and she responded likewise. Time stood still as I gazed into her beautiful, brown eyes and the sounds around us faded into a distant hum. I'm not sure how long we stood there deaf to the world around us but our bliss was momentarily shattered by Marie bumping into Elizabeth, none too gently, and jolting us out of our reverie.
Marie rolled her eyes at Elizabeth's grumbled protest at the interruption and stomped off to join her parents while we sauntered along behind, her hand tucked into my elbow, ridiculously happy to merely be in each other's company again.
As we took our places near the middle of the church pews, the thoughts around us grew speculative about my attendance with the Swansons. There were some little signs of jealousy from a few of the women, but generally, they were happy for Elizabeth, having witnessed her withdrawal from the world after the so-called tragedy of her young man's death. There was no sign of recognition in anyone's faces; apparently my family had worshiped at a different church in town.
I hadn't been to church for a little while, as Carlisle often worked weekends, and I preferred to attend with him. His father had been a preacher and Carlisle was still deeply religious despite the way his life had veered to the supernatural so long ago. I admit that Carlisle found it difficult, when I first turned, to convince me that I still had a soul and deserved God's love but over time and endless patience later, he had me attending services with him, once I was able to tolerate being close to humans again.
I found a kind of peace within the hushed walls of the churches we attended, symmetry within the rigid traditions, the hallowed in the hymns decorously sung by the choirs.
It had taken a while, but eventually I finally grew to be at ease with the creature I had become, no longer believing that I was a monster because of the way of life I had been thrust into. At first, I had been vicious in my anger towards Carlisle for taking such a step, sometimes pleading with him to end it so I could follow my parents into oblivion. I could see the pain etched into his face when I would lash out by saying such things and I was pleased at the time that he suffered for "his mistake" as I called myself.
I had just become accustomed to my new way of life and had reached an accord with Carlisle, when Esme appeared in our midst. I did not understand why he wanted her, since he had me for company. Previously we had spent many a pleasant evening discussing Carlisle's past and all that he had seen, hunting together and travelling to new places.
I started to look up to Carlisle, for the lifestyle choices he had made, his compassion for humans and vampires alike. I was fascinated by his ability to practice medicine, to be surrounded by blood all day and never be tempted to partake. I was, in fact, jealous of Esme, and while I was pleased for Carlisle at finding his mate, I was a little bit resentful that his precious time away from work was now split between us.
Eventually, greatly aided by Esme's sweet nature and mothering tendencies, my jealousy diminished until I was fully accepting of the time they spent together. Now, having reclaimed the love of my life, I felt a little guilty for the way that I had acted towards my new parents. Carlisle must have the patience of a saint and Esme a far more generous heart than mine.
They must have sometimes felt like they had been parenting a difficult three year old instead of a 17 year old vampire. I would have much to apologise for when we met up again.
I tried to pay attention to the words of the minister but Elizabeth's hand in mine was distracting. Her fingers wrapped in my fingers spread warmth through my hand and up my arm while my skin tingled where her skin touched mine. I sat on the hard pew angled towards her, caught up in the play of emotions running across her face.
Unintentionally, I let out a low groan when her thumb started tracing small circular patterns in my palm and was mortified when Mary stifled a giggle and Charles coughed to get my attention. The service had finished and I had been completely oblivious the whole time. After exchanging pleasantries with a few friends of the family and the minister, Elizabeth and I took our leave and escaped out the gate.
Finally, we were alone again and on our way to the Gallery, as planned.
"My parents really like you, Edward," said Elizabeth as we walked hand in hand along the pavement.
I smirked. "I know. Your father thinks I am a much better man for you than the old me. He thought the old me was a bit of a dreamer and the new me is perfect."
Elizabeth snorted and then blushed. "I think he is a bit embarrassed that I have been on the shelf for so long. He is probably just happy to get rid of me."
I stopped and pulled her gently around to face me. "Elizabeth, your father loves you very much. He is not embarrassed at all; he has just been very worried about you. His only concern is with your happiness. And by the way, he thinks I make you very happy."
"Oh, Edward, you do make me happy…very happy. Being with you again like this is more than I can comprehend sometimes."
As we'd spoken, we'd inched closer together without realizing until her face was suddenly only inches from mine. The urge to take her lips in a sweet kiss was strong and I started to close the small gap between us to do just that when we jumped apart at the loud interruption behind us.
"Well, I never! How scandalous! Kissing and canoodling right here in front of the café in plain view of anyone. You should be ashamed of yourselves."
"My apologies, ma'am," I bowed deeply to her. "I don't know what came over me."
"Hmmph" the old battleaxe grunted out and swung around to dissect the wicked evil ways of youth in these times as she and her cronies shuffled into the café.
Elizabeth and I dissolved into laughter and walked swiftly away from the scene of our crime. A few blocks later, we had arrived at our destination...
The Art Institute of Chicago on the lakefront of Michigan Avenue. I had asked around at the hotel and found out that this particular gallery had acquired some lovely Monets, Renoirs and even a Seurat.
Elizabeth was in her element surrounded by the French artists as she wandered from here to there. At each new discovery, her cries of delight made me grin in response. Her eyes were alight and happiness radiated from her. She hadn't been to an art gallery since I had "died", when she thought our dreams of a life in Paris had been destroyed in less than a few days.
She lingered the longest in front of a painting by Caillebotte called Paris Street, Rainy Day. The yearning to see Paris for herself, firsthand, overtook her thoughts. I leaned in behind her and whispered in her shell pink ear, "You will be there on the streets of Paris one day, with your easel out, painting the sights. And then we will go back to our little apartment overlooking Notre Dame and sit in front of the windows and watch the purple sunset over the Paris rooftops."
"Do you truly mean that, Edward? To follow our hearts desire, our old dreams of the future?"
I glanced around and confirmed that we were alone in the room before I slipped my arms around her waist and pulled her closer to me.
"Elizabeth, one day, if it is the very last thing I do, we will be living in Paris. You will be painting and I will be composing. We will have our happy ever after. I promise you."
The sound of a throat clearing behind me, jerked me to my senses. In that short time, a couple of old men had entered the room and were glaring at us. I must confess, being around Elizabeth was proving that whenever she was near, I was oblivious to the world around me. Only she existed for me.
Elizabeth blushed and confirmed that she was ready to leave. We sauntered out of the room and one of the old men winked at me as I walked past. He was thinking that if he was younger he would have given me a run for my money with the beautiful young lady. My arm crept around Elizabeth's waist then and, as she looked at me quizzically, I muttered "Dirty old man."
After that, we went to Navy Pier and had ice-cream. Well, strictly speaking, Elizabeth had ice-cream and I just stared at her little tongue flicking out over and over again to lick the cold confection.
"Do you miss eating sweet treats, Edward?" Elizabeth asked me after catching me staring at her.
"Ah...no, I really don't miss eating food at all. To me, it smells disgusting. In fact, I really have no memory of eating at all."
"Oh, I just thought you must miss it a lot. Every time I eat, you get this glazed look on your face as if you are dying to have some."
Oh my God, what should I say? She will think I am a pervert if I told her that watching her tongue lick the cold treat makes my mind turn to less than innocent thoughts of her tongue in my mouth…and other places!
"Oh, it just looks like you are really enjoying your food and I like watching you."
"Well, do you enjoy your new diet? What is your favorite animal to drink blood from?"
I felt uncomfortable going from Elizabeth's delicate enjoyment of her ice-cream to talking about my diet which involved stalking, chasing and ultimately the capture of my dinner before draining it dry of blood. I didn't really want to talk about it to Elizabeth. I had skimmed over the subject when I had first talked about being a vampire. She had seemed to accept my lifestyle so well on the surface, but I wasn't sure whether her ladylike sensibilities would tolerate the reality.
I stalled for a while and tried to change the subject.
"So what would you like to do next? There is a…"
"Uh uh uh…no way, Edward Anthony Masen Cullen…I'm not some prissy delicate flower that will faint at the drop of a hat. Tell me. We are supposed to be getting to know each other, remember?"
"Oh, Miss Swanson, you never faint, huh?" I taunted her, "So a few weeks ago when you saw me in the trees you didn't faint then…Hmmm?"
"Ah, Edward, I just saw what I thought was the ghost of my dead fiancé all of a sudden after nine years. I think I'm allowed at least one faint without everyone thinking I have a weak constitution. And, by the way, it's not everyday you meet a vampire, you know!"
"I know, love. I couldn't resist teasing you; you blush so beautifully."
"So…tell me all about your special diet. I know you drink blood from animals but which ones and how do you do it. Do you like pigs or cows or chickens?"
"Um…I like Mountain Lion preferably, but they are more of a treat. So I usually live on deer and the occasional bear. Carnivores have the best tasting blood but we can, in a pinch, live on the blood of farm animals."
Elizabeth shocked gasp halted me in my tracks. "You eat lions and bears? Isn't that dangerous? You could be killed, Edward. I think you should stick to deer from now on."
I chuckled and she punched my arm. "It's not funny, Edward. I can't face losing you to a vicious mountain lion now that I've found you again."
I grabbed her hands to stop her punching me again. Not because it would hurt me; on the contrary, she could break her pretty little fingers on my diamond tough skin.
"Liz, I am the strongest animal out there. A swipe from a lion's paw will merely rip my clothes if I'm not careful. It won't even break my skin. And I can break a bear's jaw with my little finger. They are in much more danger from me than I ever will be from them."
"Will you take me out hunting with you one day?"
"No. It would be too dangerous, Elizabeth. When vampires hunt, all of our senses are taken over and the hunt becomes instinctual. It would be too risky for you to be anywhere near to me or the animals we hunt. I can't face the thought of losing you either."
She nodded thoughtfully looking past me down the pier. She giggled before seizing my hand and pulling me towards the sideshow alley. "Well, if I can't see you hunt the real thing, let's see how well you can do with the plush variety!"
"The what?"
"I'm talking about stuffed animals, Edward. You show your prowess at the arcade games and you win stuffed animals." Elizabeth giggled again.
"Liz, are you challenging me to a competition to win fluffy toys?"
"Why yes, yes I am, Mr Cullen."
Shortly thereafter, I won a stuffed teddy bear for Elizabeth at the ball toss and then Elizabeth won for me, a stuffed mountain lion at the creepy grinning clowns. Elizabeth was almost hysterical with laughter when she spied the revulsion on my face at the sight of the clowns.
"What…they're scary and creepy" I whined. Really creepy!
"Says the vampire to the human," Elizabeth replied drily.
"Well, I guess there is something that scares vampires more than mountain lions and bears after all!"
I hadn't laughed this much in forever. Elizabeth was not only beautiful and sweet, she was funny too. I loved every minute of our times together.
A little further down the arcade, we came upon one of the new photomaton booths I had read about in the paper this morning. I pointed it out to Elizabeth and we walked over to have a look. The technician came out and explained the process to us and I eagerly agreed to have our photographs taken. New inventions fascinated me.
We walked into the booth and sat side by side on the bench seat. Before we were ready, the light flashed and we swung our heads towards the front. The next one, we were both staring intently at the front of the booth to see where the picture was being taken when the flash blinded us again. The next time, we were more prepared and hugging our toys in our arms as we pressed our heads closer together. The flash went off and I turned to smile at Elizabeth and she returned my smile when I sensed the flash firing one last time.
Because I couldn't resist any longer, I ducked my head and kissed Elizabeth quickly. Our lips clung for a moment and then parted before we were ushered out of the booth. Elizabeth's heart rate had increased for that brief moment and she had blushed again, sure that the assistant had seen the kiss as he parted the curtain.
I squeezed her hand to reassure her, and as she looked up at me, I shook my head slightly to let her know that he had not seen us. She sighed in relief that we wouldn't be criticized a third time for inappropriate behavior in the one day. Before I had come back into her life, she would have never dreamed that she could so forget herself and her surroundings like she had today. Not that she would change one minute of it.
"I wouldn't change a single minute either," I whispered to her as we waited impatiently to see the photographs.
"I'm not used to this mind reading thing," she grumbled at me good naturedly, punching my arm again.
"Sweetheart, it's not like I can turn it off. Sometimes, if I concentrate really hard on something specific, the noises will dim a little, but usually whenever people are nearby I can hear them."
"Doesn't that make you feel crazy, always having voices in your head?"
I was just about to reply when I heard the lab assistant returning. He held out an envelope to us and I eagerly took it out of his hands and opened it. The four small sepia photographs came out in a strip and I couldn't help but laugh when I saw the first two.
In the first photograph, Liz had turned so quickly when the flash went off that her long hair had whipped around and obscured much of our faces from the camera. In the second, we were both leaning forward and staring wide eyed into the camera. In the third photograph we were relaxed and smiling, our heads close together.
I really wanted the last photograph. In the image, we were turned towards each other, gentle smiles on our faces as we gazed into each others eyes. I loved it. I felt Elizabeth's small hand slip into mine and she leaned her head against my arm. In her mind, she said to me,"I love you, Edward."
"And I love you, Elizabeth." I leaned down to her as we walked out of the shopfront.
The day was speedily coming to a close and I had to get Elizabeth home before dinner. The Swansons sat down for a family meal each Sunday evening and I didn't want to arrive late. We left the pier and walked back to my hotel to pick up my car.
The closer we got to her home, the quieter Elizabeth became. Her thoughts were in a whirl as she touched on parts of our day combined with the sadness of having to part for the day. In the morning, she had another shift at the hospital and I eagerly offered to pick her up and take her and then drive her home again. Happily, she willingly acquiesced to my offer, pleased that the time until we saw each other again would be shorter than she thought.
I escorted Elizabeth to her front door and took my leave from the family when dinner was ready to be served. Charles had asked me to stay, however, I didn't think I would be able to dispose of the meal easily in close quarters. I reluctantly gave my apologies by fabricating a dinner invitation from an old friend of my father's.
In truth, I had plans for this evening that couldn't involve Elizabeth. I wanted to retrieve some items from storage that Carlisle had arranged. Although the bulk of the family items had to be left in the Masen home, Carlisle had snuck into the house the day he had changed me and retrieved a number of articles he thought I would value some day.
He had hidden these items under the floorboards of the study in the house he owned in the city in which we had lived for a short time before we had to leave. Unfortunately, the house had been rented out some years ago, so I would have to partake in some breaking and entering in the dark hours of the early morning.
I drove home slowly, my travels taking me past all the places we had been earlier in the day. First the church where I felt warmed by the acceptance of her family. Next I passed the art gallery and I repeated my vow to make Elizabeth's dreams of living in Paris a reality. My final landmark was the Navy Pier and memories of our laughter completed the perfect day.
I needed no more time to know Elizabeth, to know my self. My shock at Elizabeth's announcement a few days ago that we had planned to get married so young now seemed ridiculous. I must have known back then, an immature human teenager, the important role this woman would fulfill in my life.
In mere moments, the time it took to drive from the Pier to the hotel, I had planned the actions I would need to take this week to make our future secure.
Once I had parked the Roadster in the parking garage of the hotel, I made my way to the concierge to ferret out some information to smooth my way this week. He was most obliging and before long I made my way back to the room clutching the hotel stationary with the invaluable details.
As soon as I entered my room, I retrieved the memento box that Elizabeth had given to me and popped in the two photographs I had retained from the strip, the little plush toy and out of my suit pocket from the previous evening, the ticket stubs from the movie house. Running my fingers over the beautiful woodwork, I gently closed the lid and replaced the box under the mattress.
Again in the early hours of the morning, I ventured stealthily out of the hotel and made my way to Carlisle's old home. Even though I had not been in the city for many years, my vampire memory directed me straight to Carlisle's house which was not far from the hospital. I walked around the bottom floor and slipped through the kitchen window that had been left slightly open for the tabby cat to sneak in and out during the night.
Stealthily, I made my way to the study without delay and pried the floorboards loose, spying the large box hidden beneath almost immediately. Rather than open the metal box there, I left the house and ran back to Elizabeth's house and settled myself under her window, shifting until I was comfortable on the rocky ground.
Just listening to her gentle breathing and steady heartbeat calmed me. In and out, thump, thump, thumpity thump. More precious than any melody I could compose. My heart no longer pumped and I no longer needed to breathe but she made me feel that although I was no longer human, I was still a man. I was a man in love with a beautiful woman.
I undid the top few buttons of my shirt and slipped my fingers inside to retrieve the thin chain hidden beneath. As soon as my fingers grasped it, I slipped the chain over my head and using the key hanging from the end, I unlocked the box. I knew exactly what was in the box; Carlisle having shown it to me not long before we left Chicago, but still I picked up each item, turning it over in my hands before putting it aside and reaching for the next.
In the very bottom of the box resided two identical jewelery boxes and these were what I wanted to take with me at the moment. One contained my mother's engagement and wedding rings and the other my father's wedding ring.
-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-
Forks 2005.
So deep into my memories had I sunk, that it was not until Carlisle sat next to me on the couch and my mouth watered with the scent of Bella's blood, did I even realize he had been standing in the doorway of my room for some minutes. He was smiling widely, and when I understood the reason why, I jumped to my feet, hurrying over to my dressing room to get ready for the next stage of Carlisle's plan.
While I had been lost in my blissful thoughts of Elizabeth, Carlisle had walked into my room and stood at the door with the lid of the vial containing Bella's blood open. I had not even flinched until I started sniffing the air as he moved closer to me on the couch.
Yes, her blood still called to me and it was difficult to be around without venom pooling in my mouth. However, the constant exposure to more and more of her blood over the last two days had desensitised me to such an extent that I didn't become feral and uncontrollable in the presence of it.
I was feeling more confident that I could be around her, if not comfortably, at least without being in imminent danger of ending her life. Much as it chafed to have been separated from her again, I would do anything it took to be reunited with my heart and soul.
Emmett was already downstairs at the front door, waiting for Carlisle and I to descend the stairs and head over to Bella's house. He had apparently been pacing the floor for quite a while and was becoming impatient. Rose and Esme had left half an hour before to hunt and he was bored with his wife and Jasper, his gaming partner, both out of the house.
"Hey, lover boy! Get your ass down here. It's approaching the witching hour and your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to lay a big one on Bella's lips."
"Shut the fuck up, Emmett. Do not speak about Bella that way. This is just about being comfortable around her at school so that I don't kill her during biology or at lunch in the cafeteria."
"Ooh, Eddie…you just said fuck again. You can keep on denying it, but it is completely obvious to all of us that you have a huge thing for Bella." Emmett sniggered.
"Emmett, I'm warning you!" I growled.
"Ah, Eddie, have you forgotten about Bella's little blue satin panties…and what you did when we left the house." He drawled as he tapped his nose, "Vampire nose…remember?"
I couldn't argue with that. He was right. I had ascertained from everyone's thoughts that each and every member of my family thought I was smitten with Bella and even Esme was secretly amused about my little adventure, as she called it, after I had discovered Bella's intimate apparel.
Still, Emmett's attitude was giving me the shits and as I walked past him, I elbowed him in the ribs, which pushed him through the window next to the door. As the glass shattered, and the shards scattered into the grass around him sprawled on the ground, I turned to Carlisle. "Sorry. I tripped going through the door. I'll fix it when we get back."
Emmett called after me as I took off down the driveway, "When you least expect it, Eddie-boy! When you least expect it…I will get you back for that!"
I ignored him, as I often did, and slowed my pace so that he and Carlisle could catch up to me. First we hunted and when I was full, we made our way to the Swan residence. Following Carlisle's lead, we easily scaled the tree outside of Bella's window and sat on the sturdy branch overlooking her room.
I could smell her blood calling to me, but it was more than bearable, here outside with a pane of thick glass and the length of the room between us. Carlisle leaned forward and raised the window, the three of us cringing when the window squeaked slightly as it lifted in the frame.
Now, the tang of her blood was stronger, I had to swallow the venom which started to pool in my mouth as the scent of freesia drifted over my tongue. I leaned forward to get a closer look at Bella asleep on the bed. It had been over a week and I was missing her sweet smile. At my sudden movement, Carlisle and Emmet both reached out and grabbed an arm each to hold me in place.
Instinctively, I switched into fight mode at being held back from my love, but then relaxed in the knowledge that if I slipped up, my family truly had my back. I whispered that I was okay and wanted to try to get a little closer. Carlisle voiced his concerns, however, he reluctantly agreed when I looked him in the eyes and told him firmly that I was okay.
Emmett entered the room first, and then Carlisle and finally I slipped into Bella's bedroom. I was instantly reminded of the first night that Elizabeth had invited me to her room so long ago. Her decorous white nightgown and her long hair plaited over her shoulders as she combed my hair with her fingers and read to me.
Bella's hair was gloriously loose, flowing over her shoulders and freshly washed. The strong scent of her strawberry shampoo made me smile. Some things never change. Elizabeth had favored a fruity shampoo heavily scented with strawberries also. Where Elizabeth had been covered head to foot in white cotton, Bella, on the other hand, slept in a form fitting tank top and tiny little sleep shorts so that much of her skin was on display where her quilt cover had been kicked partially aside. I was mesmerized by the sight until Emmett opened his big, fat mouth.
"Nice…" Emmett started to whisper, and I flung my hand out and wrapped it around his throat glaring at him before he could finish his comment.
"Dude, I'm just saying… your little human has a hot little bod!" in his mind since my fingers prevented him from actually speaking out loud.
I was just about to threaten Emmett with telling Rose when Bella mumbled in her sleep, just as she had the night Carlisle had collected her blood.
"When he shall die…make the face of heaven so fine…all the world will be in love with night…."
Emmett sniggered and I punched him again. Dude, stop with the punching. You will wake up Shakespeare girl over there. Only you could find someone that quotes Shakespeare in her sleep. She is the perfect girl for you, Nerdward!"
"Emmett, I swear to G…."
"Edward," Bella whispered and all three sets of eyes shot to the bed, sure that we had been discovered. But no, Bella's eyes were still closed, her eyelids fluttering while she dreamed.
"Edward, no…no…please no…" Bella started to shake on the bed and I reached forward to tuck her quilt more warmly around her. Carlisle was instantly by my side but stepped back a little when he could see in my face that my control was intact. I still felt the keen burn of her blood searing its way from my nostrils and engulfing my throat, but my main concern was to comfort her through her nightmare, not drain her blood from her body.
Tears started to slip from under her closed eyelids and I gently wiped them from her cheeks.
"You're so cold. Edward, E, come back to me, don't leave me, I can't bear it."
"…mm…gr.. please don't die."
I couldn't bear it and without thinking of the consequences I leaned down and gently pressed my lips against hers whispering,"I'm here now, Bella. Everything will be alright."
As if she had heard me, Bella sighed deeply and snuggled deeper into her pillow, falling into a heavy sleep.
End Notes:
Quite a bit of historical info and places in this chapter again.. If you are interested I have some images on my blog of the church and Navy Pier etc plus I post pic teasers before I post the next chapter usually while it is being beta'd.
www(dot)edwardsisobel(dot)blogspot(dot)com
Love Fred Astaire – before Fred was seen in musicals he danced on Broadway in the 1920's mainly with his sister Adele.