A/N: Well, here is chapter 10 - it took quite a bit longer than I was hoping it would. Thanks to everyone for their comments. I am glad everyone is enjoying it and the comments make it easier to sit down and start writing the next chapter.
A quick response to one of the comments - keep in mind that Palpatine was not physically on Dagobah, any more than Vader was during Luke's experience in the tree, nor was he contacting Mara through the Force, though clearly he has the ability to do so. What they both saw was a manifestation of the Force, based on their own thoughts and fears, as well as what may yet be in the future.
Hope you all enjoy the next chapter.
Chapter 10
Luke Skywalker knelt in the small clearing outside the tree, his arms wrapped around his companion where she had slumped to the ground. Her distraught weeping filled his ears and dulled his senses to the world around as he focused only on her. Her emergence from the tree only moments before, stumbling from the small opening in a panic and then sprinting across the clearing, heedless of where she was going, had astonished him. What she had witnessed in the tree had affected her badly, far worse, it appeared, than what he had seen himself during his sojourn into the depths of the Dark Side all those months ago. He had never seen her in such a state - her control over her emotions, her unflappability and calmness so much a part of her demeanor.
What had she seen in there to affect her to this extent?
He thought back to his own experience in the tree, the shock of seeing his own face inside Darth Vader's mask, the confusion over exactly what it meant. Of course he had not fully understood it at the time - understanding had ultimately come with a price. Could the Force have shown her a fate, a future so dire it had blasted her composure and reduced her to the weeping young woman who even now clung to him as though she never meant to let go?
Whatever it was she had seen, it had frightened her greatly and he also sensed grief and loss in her emotions, although loss for what he could not say as her shields remained as high and impenetrable as ever.
Uncertain what he could do for her, Luke decided the best thing would be to simply be there for her and allow her the luxury of a shoulder to cry on, the comfort of a friend. He held her in his arms, his hand gently tracing circles on her back, as he murmured what he hoped were comforting words into her ear, willing her to calm on her own. Perhaps the two of them could discuss whatever she had seen and come to some understanding of it - at least enough to allow her some peace of mind. Master Yoda always said knowledge was the best way to combat fear of the unknown.
Eventually, after a period of only minutes, though it had seemed like hours, her sobs quieted and she leaned more heavily into him, clinging to him like he were some phantom which would disappear if she were to let him go. She was quiet and still and if he had not been able to sense the continued turmoil of her mind, he may have thought she had fallen asleep.
Abruptly, however, she shrank back from him, furiously scrubbing at her eyes, trying to wipe away the evidence of her weakness. She stood and took a few steps away from him, to Luke's eyes, obviously trying to gather herself to face him. Once again he wondered what exactly she had seen and why she now appeared to be so uncertain of their relationship.
"Arica," he began, "what happened in there? What did you see?"
She whirled on him and gazed at him angrily, her breathing still dominated by great gulps of air. She visibly took a deep breath and calmed herself before answering.
"I'd rather not talk about it."
Luke took her appearance in, but chose to ignore the warning signs - this was much too important.
"Arica, it would be better..."
"Better!" she shrieked, her face contorting in anger. "What would you know about better? You're the one who brought me to this hellish hole in the first place!"
Taken aback by her vehement tone, Luke shrank from her anger, hurt at the accusation in her voice. She immediately sensed his confusion and hurt and she seemed to visibly gather herself.
"Look Skywalker," she began after breathing in several large, calming gulps of air, her tone calmer and less accusing than it had been a moment before. "I'm sorry. I know you mean well, but I'd really prefer not to talk about this now - I need to think about it first. Try to understand what just happened."
He could see through it though, knew her air of calm and controlled rationality was merely a façade, that underneath the emotions and fears careening though her mind were tightly controlled and suppressed. Knowing the dangers of indefinitely suppressing such intense feelings prompted Luke to attempt once more to reason with her. "Wouldn't it be better to unburden yourself on a friend? Maybe we can figure it out together."
She shook her head vehemently. "I'd really rather... not talk about it. Let me think about it on my own... then maybe we can discuss it."
Luke suspected she would prefer not to tell him at all, but even in the short time he had known her, he had begun to know the warning signs. Now was not a good time to argue the point with her - she had made her decision and pressing the issue now would only make matters worse.
"If that's what you want, Arica. Just remember - I'm here for you whenever you want to talk about it."
Her face was unreadable, but underneath the front she put up, Luke felt a slight shift in her emotions. He knew she appreciated his offer, although she was still frightened of telling him what she had seen.
"I think we've done all we can on this mud ball of a planet," she said, abruptly changing the subject. "I'd really like it if we left this place far behind."
"All right, Arica," Luke responded, sensing this would be for the best. "Let's leave then - it is about time to get back to the fleet anyway."
"Alliance Command, this is Commander Luke Skywalker in the Emerald Justice, requesting clearance and approach vector for docking with Home One."
"Acknowledged, Commander, please transmit your clearance code."
Reaching over to the keypad, Luke began to key in his personal code, catching a glimpse of Arica watching him as she observed their approach toward the massive rebel fleet.
The fleet was an awesome, majestic sight which sent shivers up his spine and engendered a feeling of pride and confidence in the cause. Never before in the history of the Rebellion had the full might of the Alliance fleet been gathered together in one location to be thrown into one titanic clash against the Emperor's forces. It was an enormous gamble, one which may ultimately represent the end of the rebellion, but to do nothing would almost certainly spell the Alliance's end, albeit in a much slower fashion. The new Death Star would not have the same weakness of the original and if it was allowed to be completed, it would not be stopped and many more lives would be forfeit. Clearly, inaction was not an option.
"Emerald Justice, you are clear to dock with Home One, docking bay 11. Coordinates and approach vector are being transferred to you now."
Luke studied the information appearing on his screen momentarily. "Thank you, control, Skywalker out."
Moments later they had landed in the hanger bay of the giant star cruiser and Luke was running through the power down sequences. His co-pilot said nothing, seeming content to simply assist with the work of shutting the small shuttle's engines down and preparing to leave.
She had not said much in the past two days, Luke reflected, not since her fateful trip into the tree and whatever had scared her so badly. She had kept to herself the first day, refusing to speak with him, or have any contact at all. She had stayed in the small cabin, lost deeply in thought he suspected, but whether she was trying to understand and assimilate what she had seen, or was brooding about something else entirely, Luke could not quite tell.
The second day she had opened up to a certain extent, allowing contact and conversation, but only as it related to the Force and the training he continued to attempt to impart to her. All other subjects were now taboo; she seemed determined to keep him at arm's length - all the previous progress they had made in understanding one another, not to mention the closeness they had developed, had completely evaporated.
Luke was puzzled - he would have expected the tree to show her things which would be difficult for her to see, much as he had seen himself, but he could not imagine what she had seen which would cause her to draw away from him so completely. And to make matters worse, Luke had felt a tickling on the edge of his senses ever since they had left Dagobah - almost a premonition of the future, although as of yet he had not received any specific visions or promptings from the Force. Since he had left Dagobah and his training behind to rescue his friends, he had shied away from such visions, although at times they came on their own, as the one in Jabba's palace had. Now, however, he tried to remain receptive to them, knowing he would need every weapon in his arsenal if he was to defeat the Emperor.
"So what happens now?" a soft voice eased him from his thoughts.
He glanced to the side at his companion, noticing her intent look on him, more like the woman he had known before the tree than the one who had shared the ship for the past two days.
"We need to find Leia and Han," he responded. "They will know what is going on and what our next move is. Actually, unless I miss my guess, they have already been told of our arrival."
Arica nodded slightly and peered out the front window of the ship to the docking bay waiting outside.
"Arica," Luke began hesitantly, "I appreciate you bringing me here, but if you would prefer not to become involved with the Alliance, now is your last chance to leave."
She glanced back at him, arching an eyebrow at his statement. "I'm surprised, Skywalker. I would have thought you rebel types would be far more likely to try to recruit people, rather than trying to drive them away."
"I just want you to understand what you're getting yourself into," Luke responded, refusing to react to her playful tone of voice.
"Believe me, Skywalker - I know what I'm getting into. But you're not getting rid of me that easily."
Luke nodded simply and flashed her a brief smile. "All right then, let's get out of here."
Outside the ship, the welcoming committee was gathered, but those Luke would have expected to see assembled to greet them were conspicuously absent. At the foot of the ramp, a lone junior officer waited as they descended down to the deck of the bay.
"Commander Skywalker," the young man began with a salute, "I have been instructed to inform you the High Command is meeting to discuss the upcoming offensive. You are to join them in the main debriefing room."
"Thank you, we will proceed there directly."
"I'm sorry Commander, but I wasn't told anything about your companion. Perhaps it would be better if she waited here."
"Thank you, but that won't be necessary," Luke responded a little testily, even though he knew the man was just doing his job. "I will vouch for my companion and take full responsibility for her conduct."
Motioning to Arica, Luke stepped past the man and entered the corridor which would lead to the conference room where the briefing was taking place. Arica's soft footfalls reached his ears as she hurried to keep up with him.
"Are all you rebels so... distrustful?"
Luke glanced at her distractedly. "Every man and woman here is wanted by the Empire. Wouldn't you be?"
"Touché. I suppose I would be at that."
"Luckily, I outranked him - rank does have its privileges. The officer was only trying to do his job and I took no offense."
She was silent for several moments while they continued. He sensed she wanted to say something, but did not quite know how to phrase whatever was on her mind.
"Will you get in trouble for bringing me into this?"
Luke considered the question. Undoubtedly there would be some who would object to her presence, not as a recruit to the Alliance - it was a well known fact they were always trying to add to their ranks - but as a stranger brought into one of the highest and most secret councils. Indeed, he himself would have objected if another were to do the same.
But something felt right about this. Although he continued to be completely in the dark about her past and her background, he knew instinctively he could trust her - something which the Force confirmed. The Force was also telling him that whatever was to happen, his fate and hers were inextricably linked, that she would have her part to play in the final battle with the Empire. It made no logical sense, but he knew she was needed. Whatever the reaction from the Alliance leadership, he knew he had no choice but to follow the promptings of the Force. Master Yoda had drilled that into his head, quite thoroughly.
"I suppose it's possible," he began slowly, thinking his way through the situation. "We don't normally bring newcomers into our highest councils, but something tells me you need to be there."
Arica stopped abruptly and she stared at him. "Are you certain?"
"As certain as I can be. You have your part to play in all this, Arica. I don't know what or how, but your destiny was set the moment you decided to stay with me and train, regardless of the danger of being with the Alliance."
"You're putting a lot of trust in me. You've only known me for a week - there are bound to be some who will point that out."
Luke shrugged. "Let them. Master Yoda taught me to be mindful of the promptings of the Force and that is exactly what I am doing. The Alliance Command knows I have been training to be a Jedi; they will come around."
"I hope you know what you're doing," she muttered, as he began walking down the corridor once again.
Luke could only agree.
The briefing room was large and circular, benches lined the chamber, each successive row lower than the last, down to the bottom circle. In the exact center of the room stood a large holoprojection unit, which currently displayed an image of the uncompleted Death Star. The meeting had just begun.
Not wanting to disrupt the proceedings, Luke motioned Arica to the side of the entrance, where they stood and watched Mon Mothma, and then Admiral Ackbar, explain the plan of assault on the massive station. The plan was daring, yet simple, a reflection of the brilliant mind of the Mon Calamari Admiral, and Luke immediately understood the significance of the intelligence gained by the Bothan spies. The Emperor was on board the station - there would never be a better chance to strike directly at the heart of the Empire. And by extension, if the Emperor were on the station, Vader could not be far away.
The thought of his father engendered uncomfortable feelings and memories; Luke shook his head slightly to banish the thoughts and caught sight of his companion. She was focused, her attention rapt upon the explanation of the battle plan as it was explained on the floor below. Luke had never seen her so focused or keenly interested as she appeared now.
A slight feeling of unease burrowed its way into Luke's consciousness as he considered her profile, but Luke shook it off as a fancy and nothing more. Of course she would want to know everything she could about the coming battle as it would affect her no less than anyone else in the room.
Trying to concentrate on the plan unfolding before him, Luke opened himself up to the influence of the Force, trying to sense his path in the coming battle. In the past his duty would have been clear - as commander of Rogue Squadron, he would have led his companions into battle as the spearhead of the Alliance forces.
But circumstances had changed in the past six months and Luke was now no longer certain his place was with the fighter wing. His talents may be of use in some other capacity.
The topic abruptly changed and the discussion shifted to the plan to land on Endor and deactivate the deflector shield protecting the space station; Luke heard a whisper from the Force and he suddenly knew where he belonged. For whatever reason, the Force wanted him on that moon and he knew he had to obey the prompting.
"Arica, do you trust me?"
The redhead turned on him in surprise. "That's a strange question to be asking at a time like this. Why do you ask?"
Luke gestured down to the discussion, which was just now turning to the announcement of Han as the assault team's general. "I have to go with them to Endor. Before you ask, no I don't know why, but I think you should go along as well. Do you trust me?"
"You know I do," she replied simply. "If that's where we need to go, then that's where we'll go."
Flashing a grateful smile, Luke turned his attention back to the floor, where Leia was now signaling her intent to be part of the command team for the mission. Luke motioned for Arica to follow and stepped out into the room.
"We're with you too," he said while descending the stairs, Arica beside him.
A cheer went up in the room and Leia stood and rushed to him, throwing her arms around him with delight. For the first time, he held her in his arms, knowing she was his sister and finally being able to put a name to the feeling he had felt the whole time of their acquaintance and at last, he felt as though he was home.
"I'd still like to know what you were thinking when you brought that woman into a classified briefing."
The general's voice was raised in anger and accusatory in tone, but Luke made no response - they had already discussed this. He had never liked Madine. Certainly the man was competent, or even brilliant, but he had always struck Luke as arrogant and taciturn, sometimes bordering on uncivil. Of course, many Imperial defectors seemed to have the same attitude, although there were certainly exceptions to the rule - several pilots were also defectors, including one of the Rogues, and among them there were those whom he considered among his closest friends.
"We've already been through this," Ackbar spoke up in his gravelly voice. "Now we must decide what to do."
Madine shrugged while throwing a disapproving glance in Luke's direction. "Throw her in the brig until after the battle."
"Perhaps it isn't that easy," Mon Mothma spoke up, her voice soft, but her eyes were focused on Luke. "Jedi Skywalker tells us her presence is necessary and I learned long ago not to discount the advice given by the Jedi."
"Begging your pardon ma'am, but I don't hold with this mystical Jedi tripe," Madine disagreed. "The fact is we are about to go into the most important engagement of this war and we can't afford to have a potential security risk included in a guerilla mission of this importance."
"Arica is not a security risk," Luke responded softly.
"How do you know? By your own admission you have only known her a week. How day you be so certain?"
"The Force confirms it."
"I'm sorry, Commander, but I'm afraid I can't allow the Force to influence our military decisions."
"The Jedi order of old was trusted and their advice was heeded. Why am I any different?"
"And look where it got them?" Madine shot back. "For that matter, the situation the galaxy is in because of the failure of the Jedi. And just because you wear a lightsaber doesn't make you a Jedi, no matter where you've been these past months."
"With all due respect, General," Luke responded, his tone icy, "I certainly don't believe the fall of the Old Republic was entirely the Jedi order's responsibility."
"Maybe not, but they are all extinct now, aren't they? And this in spite of their magical powers." Madine waved his hands in the approximation of a charlatan performing his tricks before an audience. "It's all a lot of parlor tricks and sleight of hand."
"Don't be too certain, General," Han spoke up quietly. "I used to think the same, but I've seen enough of what Luke can do that I can't discount the existence of the Force."
"Of course you would support him, Solo," Madine responded with some rancor. "Your friendship is well known."
"Maybe so. But I'm also known as being very practical, not to mention skeptical. The first time the Kid came on my ship I gave him and Kenobi a bad time about the Force and ridiculed their devotion to what I called an 'ancient religion'. But things have changed since then. I don't know nothing about his mystical energy field, but Luke's surprised me one too many times to ignore him now."
"This arguing is not getting us anywhere," Mothma interjected into the exchange. "General Solo, what is your opinion about allowing this Arica to become a member of the assault team?"
Han glanced at Luke and directed his attention back to the leader of the rebellion. "I don't know Arica well, it's true, but I'll trust Luke's judgment. If he thinks she's trustworthy, then that's good enough for me."
"What about her suitability for a covert mission?" Ackbar asked. "It's going to be rough down there; can she handle it?"
Han shifted in his seat uncomfortably, before responding. "I can tell you she can use a blaster and she seems competent to me. But besides all that, Luke says he's been training her to be a Jedi. I have a good idea of his skills; another Jedi on this mission would be helpful."
"General, please leave Jedi skills out of this," Madine interjected once again. "We must concentrate on the facts here. We can't let her go along on this mission - it would be unconscionable!"
"On the contrary, General," Mothma spoke again, "I have every confidence in the abilities of the Jedi and if Jedi Skywalker believes she is ready and needed on this mission, then I think we should allow it."
Madine stared at her, aghast at what she was saying. "Princess, what is your opinion?" she continued, not waiting for Madine to protest again.
The one member of the chamber who had thus far been silent said nothing in response immediately, caught up as she was in her own thoughts. Knowing her as his sister, however, seemed to give him greater insight to her feelings, and although he could sense a certain something in them, an emotion he could not quite make out though he knew she was struggling with it, she seemed to him to have no great opposition to his insistence on Arica's presence on the mission. She seemed more resigned than anything.
"I will also admit, I do not know Arica at all," she responded at last. "But I feel I must agree with Han on this. We all know Luke's instincts are unparalleled and if he is convinced Arica is trustworthy, then I believe him."
"Admiral Ackbar?" Mothma addressed the Mon Calamari. "As overall commander of this operation, I feel the final decision must be yours."
The admiral regarded the others impassively, his alien countenance giving away nothing. Although Ackbar had always supported Luke and his quest to learn more of the Jedi and his heritage, Luke also knew he was a staunch proponent of the Alliance and would do everything in his power to assure the success of the mission and of the war. If he deemed that included throwing a young woman in a prison cell because he believed her to be a security risk, he would not hesitate to order it.
"The Mon Calamari also remember and honor the Jedi," he spoke up at last. "I sincerely hope their influence has not left the galaxy and that you can resurrect the order. I agree with Mothma; if Jedi Skywalker believes Arica is needed on this mission, then I will allow it."
"Thank you, Admiral," Luke responded, letting out in relief a breath he had not even known he had been holding.
"Just remember; you will be walking into a heavily defended enemy installation and the fighting will be intense. Your companion must take responsibility for her own safety."
"I understand, Admiral. She knows enough not only to defend herself, but will also be an asset to the mission."
"In that case, unless there is anything else, I think we can adjourn," Mothma said, while rising to her feet.
Madine cast a withering glare in Luke's direction and abruptly stomped from the room in a huff. Luke, not caring at all for his opinion or his approval, rose as well and turned to his friends.
"Thanks for the assist, Han," Luke said, as Leia made her exit from the room.
"Hey, no problem, kid. I kind of like her anyway. Besides which, I trust you."
"Jedi Skywalker," Mothma said as she approached them, "you mentioned a Jedi master you had been training with. Who was it?"
"Master Yoda."
"Yoda?" she said, her eyes widening in surprise. "I had thought he had died during the purges. You know, I actually met him as a young woman. Such a small being, but you knew you were talking with someone special when he spoke - a wise and great Jedi Master."
"Yes, he was," Luke said, his eyes glazing over in memory.
"Was?" she responded, the smile leaving her face.
Luke felt a lump in his throat as he was reminded of the great Jedi's recent passing. "Master Yoda died when I visited him only a few days ago."
Mothma's eyes clouded over as she absorbed this information. "Then he will be missed," she intoned solemnly. "I believe, however, he could not have bestowed his teachings on and entrusted the future of the Jedi to a more worthy recipient. I believe both he and Kenobi would be proud of the Jedi and the man you have become."
"Thank you," Luke responded, overcome by emotion and unable to say anything else.
Mothma studied them intently for a moment, before continuing. "Make certain you succeed," she directed her words at both of them. "The entire Alliance is depending on you."
She turned and retreated from the room, leaving Han and Luke behind as the two friends exchanged a look.
"No pressure, huh?" Han quipped.
"None at all," Luke responded in like vein, pushing the familiar sorrow over the loss of his mentor to the back of his mind.
"Then, I guess it's pretty much business as usual."
"I don't know, Han," Luke drawled in response. "It doesn't seem that bad to me."
Han laughed and slapped Luke on the back, directing him out of the room. "Come on, Kid, I could use something large, alcoholic and preferably Corellian."
The waiting was the hardest part. Not knowing for certain exactly what was being discussed and what her ultimate fate would be was a close second.
Skywalker's announcement had been met with cheers as the rebellion's elite had welcomed one of their greatest heroes back on the eve of battle, but Mara would have had to be blind not to notice the look of consternation which had crossed the general's face as she had entered the briefing room at Skywalker's side. When she had been introduced to the highest ranking officers of the Alliance that expression had turned to one of utter fury and he had demanded to see Skywalker and the other leaders in a private conference. Of course, Mon Mothma and the Mon Calamari admiral had not been exactly thrilled to see her either
She knew of all of them, of course, especially the general; her files on him were extensive - creator and original commander of the infamous Storm Commandos, General Crix Madine was at once revered and respected as a brilliant and innovative military leader and reviled for being traitor and defector to the Rebellion. He was one of the few for whom she had standing orders to eliminate with extreme prejudice if she was ever to cross his path. Of course, her current orders regarding Skywalker superseded that directive.
For what seemed like the hundredth time, Mara rose from her seat and began pacing the room agitatedly like a nervous kath hound worrying a bone. She could not hear what was going on in the room - the walls were too thick and secure for that, but she could sense Skywalker's agitated state and feel his frustration through his shields. Either the general was angering Skywalker with his objections to her presence or the meeting was not going well and they would not allow her to go on the mission.
At that thought, Mara exhaled loudly, a sigh of frustration and helplessness, and threw herself back into the chair, her chin resting against a hand as she brooded over the situation. She should never have let Skywalker talk her into this. If they did not let her go on the mission, small chance they would let her simply depart on the eve of the largest and most important offensive of the war. No, if she was not allowed to go, then she would be kept under house arrest at best, thrown into the brig at worst, and she would have failed her mission. Her master was not about to accept or excuse any explanations of extenuating circumstances. No, for him all that would matter was the fact that she had not shown up with Skywalker at the appointed time. The mission would be a complete failure and she would be punished as such - if she even survived the battle in which for all the Rebellion's firepower, it was surely no match for the might of the Imperial Navy. She was certain her master, experienced and cunning as he was, would not be caught completely unawares by this surprise attack on his most prized project.
And if they did let her go along with Skywalker... She had begun to come up with a vague idea, an answer to her dilemma, a way for her to avoid the one thing she wanted most to avoid - telling Skywalker of her affiliation with his greatest enemy.
A chance to forever erase her past.
Her conscious mind still shied away from the thought of betraying her master, but if there was a way of doing it and never having to meet him to face the consequences, would she not take it?
When the door opened and brought her abruptly from her reverie, she glanced up to see the general stalking from the room, after directing a thunderous glare in her direction. He was followed shortly by the Mon Calamari admiral who also said nothing as he hurried out the room in pursuit of the angry general.
It was only then Mara allowed herself to breathe a sigh of relief - the general's demeanor coupled with the fact she had not immediately been clapped in chains told her all she needed to know.
When the princess walked through the doorway, she paused as if considering and then deliberately made her way to confront Arica, who stood up, half in defiance, half in apprehension of what the other would say. The difference in Organa from the last time they had met was striking; the commanding presence of the diminutive Alderaanian was something she had never witnessed while on Tatooine. Although she was about the same size as the princess, she felt as if the other towered above her and in that instant, Mara knew how this woman had been able to become the youngest senator in the history of the galaxy and inspire millions in the fight against the Empire.
For a moment, Organa said nothing, merely staring at Mara with an appraising look on her face, until Mara began to feel like a Twi'lek slave on display.
"Somehow, he trusts you," she said suddenly, her voice introspective, as though she had almost forgotten she was speaking to Mara. "He's only known you for a few days, but he trusts you and believes in you. Sometimes I wish I could see things the way he does - believe with the same conviction, hold the same surety, feel the promptings of the Force. But I can't. And I'm not certain what he sees in you."
The observation jolted Mara and helped her overcome the feeling of awe which had overtaken her - she was not about to be judged by the other woman. "And he sees more in you perhaps? You don't even know me, Leia; I'd prefer you didn't judge me."
Whereas Mara would have expected the other woman to take offense at her testy words, Organa merely cocked her head to the side and gazed back at Mara, her visage a little less severe. "I suppose it must appear to you like I'm judging you and I don't blame you for feeling that way. The truth of the matter is I'm just protective of him - we all are."
Her manner of expressing herself softened Mara's attitude slightly, but she still was not completely mollified. "Does he need you to look after him? He is a grown man after all."
Leia chuckled. "No, I suppose he doesn't. But you didn't see him when he first walked into the detention center on the Death Star. I honestly don't think I've ever seen anyone quite as naive as he was - he was so green, he almost looked like a Twi'lek!"
Involuntarily, Mara found herself responding to the wry way Leia had of talking about Skywalker - she could well imagine the way he had appeared as a teenager. Even now although she knew that he had changed in the years since that first experience with the Rebellion, there was still something open and trusting in his manner. And after she had spent more than a week in his company, she found his openness difficult to comprehend, so far removed was it from what she had grown up with and learned to expect from those of the Emperor's court with whom she had interacted.
"I guess it's become sort of a habit for all of us," Organa continued after a moment's pause. "Luke is a rare, special person and those of us he calls his friends are very protective of him, as I'm certain you've already noticed. But the thing about Luke is, he is usually right about people - if he considers a person worthy of trust, then that person can be trusted, whereas one he instinctively distrusts can be looked on with suspicion. I always put it down to his judgment of character before, but now I realize it is also due to a heavy dose of the Force."
"Does that mean you trust me then?"
"I don't know I'd go that far," the princess responded, with a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eye.
Mara found herself responding with a smile. She had never felt this way. This simple camaraderie and friendship which existed between these people was something with which she had no experience, but it warmed her and penetrated her soul. She felt giddy and lightheaded, and wanted to know more; she wanted to know what it was like to be a part of a group, to be trusted and liked for who she was.
She knew in that instant no matter what was to happen, she could not hand Skywalker over to the Emperor - to do so would be a betrayal to him, his friends, the men and women of the Rebellion who looked upon him as a hero. Most of all, it would be a betrayal of herself, of the life she had never lived, but now so desperately wanted. Betraying her master was no small thing, but she now understood why she had always felt so ill at ease doing her master's bidding, why she had always longed for a life outside the blood and the horrible things she was forced to do as his lackey.
Not for the first time she wondered where she had come from, how she had come to be in the Emperor's service. He had never even tried to give her an explanation of her background, only stating she was his servant now and she had best remember her place and do her duty. But at some point, she must have been part of a family, had parents who had loved her, friends her own age. How had she come to leave that comfortable existence?
"It's hard for you, isn't it?"
Startled, Mara's eyes focused once more on the Alderaanian princess, who was regarding her with a compassionate expression on her face.
"From what you've told us of your background, it sounds as though you have spent most of your life by yourself. Sometimes it can be difficult to accept others in your circle when you have been alone so long."
Mara swallowed, her throat suddenly dry, a stinging in her eyes marring her vision. "It is... hard. I've never had anyone I could call a... a friend. Even when my... mother... was alive, she was cold and distant... Sometimes it felt like I was alone, even when she was there."
"Then, that is something we need to change."
Startled, Mara's eyes flew to the entrance to the conference room, where Skywalker stood, gazing back at her with compassion and affection. Behind him, Solo stood watching the scene, his appearance one of open friendship rather than the usual slightly knowing and occasionally smarmy expression he usually sported.
Skywalker approached her, his smile never wavering. "You're among friends now, Arica. There is no reason for you to ever feel alone again."
Mara felt tears pooling in her eyes at his words and managed a tremulous smile in response. Sensing her emotions, or perhaps reading them on her face, Skywalker reached out and grasped her shoulders, squeezing them in comfort before turning back to his companions. And Mara, still uncomfortable with the emotions coursing through her, nevertheless basked in the warmth and friendship she felt between these people, hoping for the day when she would be included in their feelings for one another.
The main cantina on board Home One was loud and boisterous. Clouds of smoke drifted lazily though the open rooms, creating a hazy atmosphere, eerily reminiscent of Dagobah on a misty morning. Revelers packed the rooms cheering and egging each other on to greater feats of drinking - undoubtedly the medical bays would be full of revelers, the droids kept busy undoing the effects of a night's hard drinking. But to Luke, who had had occasion to join these impromptu parties in the past, underneath the carousing and merrymaking, there existed an almost desperate, fearful quality - the partiers were determined to make the most of the night, for tomorrow assault on the Death Star would commence in earnest and the Alliance would be throwing the entire might of their star fleet against the half finished battle station. For many of those in attendance this evening, this would be their last party - many would not return. A part of Luke missed those days, the camaraderie, the danger and excitement, the anticipation of the coming struggle.
But those times were now long gone - gone as surely as his youth and innocence. He was older now, carried responsibilities heavier than he had ever dreamed possible. If it had not been for a request from one of his closest friends, he knew he would now be in his room, meditating, seeking the Force for guidance, worrying about the upcoming confrontation and trying not to think of his relationship with a certain Sith Lord... or a certain redhead.
Luke grinned to himself at the thought of Arica - at least she was well taken care of at the moment. He had left her in the capable hands of his sister - Arica still somewhat uneasy at the camaraderie between the friends, Leia genuinely trying to get to know her better now that she appeared to be here to stay. Of course, Lando had also made an appearance and had offered to accompany the two women to dinner. Luke was surprised to see less of the suave, somewhat oily lady's man and more of the genuinely affable fellow he had come to consider a friend. He had, however, not been able to resist a couple of comments about the status of Luke's relationship with the fiery redhead, comments which were sly and filled with innuendo, but also with good-natured humor. At least, mercifully, the comments had been made out of the range of Arica's hearing. He really liked this Lando better than the other, although being the butt end of his jokes was sometimes a little irksome.
Shaking his head at the thought of his irreverent friend, Luke turned his attention to his surroundings and began to make his way through the hazy room. A group of pilots from another squadron caught his attention and beckoned for him to join them, but Luke merely smiled and nodded at them, while he continued to focus on finding his friend.
A moment later he had arrived. Han Solo sat alone at a table - a surprise really, considering the denseness of the revelers. In his left hand he held a drink - some Corellian concoction no doubt, given Han's preferences - and despite the noise around him, his eyes were unfocussed as he sightlessly stared off at something only he could see.
Han glanced up as Luke sat down and gave his usual hearty greeting, which was returned by the younger man, but while he appeared to be trying to give the impression of normality, Luke could tell something serious was on Han's mind. The other offered to get him a drink, and when the order was placed and the drink delivered, they fell into an awkward silence. It was a concern to Luke as he had rarely seen his friend like this.
"So, Luke, what's with you and the redhead?" Han spoke suddenly, breaking the silence between them.
"I seem to remember you asking me this once before," Luke responded with a laugh.
"Yeah, and I seem to remember you ducking the question," Han shot back, his good-natured grin belying the sharp tone, the twinkle in his eye a contrast to the serious expression on his face.
"Why does there have to be anything between Arica and me?"
"I don't know kid - you tell me. All I know is I've been trying to figure you two out ever since you got back and I'm not having a lot of luck."
"What's to figure out? I'm training her to be a Jedi."
Han shook his head, then leaned forward and eyed Luke earnestly. "Look kid, I don't have this fancy Force you always talk about, but I have eyes in my head and I can tell there is more going on between you two than just training."
Luke suspected Han may be right, but since he was having difficulty determining in his own mind exactly what was between himself and the redhead, he knew he did not want to talk about it in any great detail - even with his best friend. In fact, he especially did not want to discuss it with Han, due to the Corellian's predilection for turning everything into a joke.
"Look, Han, I'm not certain what you think you see, but I can assure you there is nothing out of the ordinary between Arica and me."
"Look, Kid, she stares at you with a perplexed look on her face and sometimes I wonder if she's going to kiss you or pull that little blaster on you. And you - you're no better. You wander around with that lost little bantha cub expression and when you look at her, there's no doubt in my mind you feel something for her."
Knowing Han was very perceptive and being on the receiving end of Han's razor sharp observations was something completely different - it was unnerving and served only to irritate Luke. Whatever was between Arica and him was their business and the constant ribbing from Han, worried looks from Leia and Lando's knowing, smarmy witticisms were starting to get on the young man's nerves.
"I've only known her for a week - what do you think can have happened in so short a time?" he responded somewhat testily.
"This coming from the guy who was already daydreaming about Leia a half hour after we got off the Death Star," Han retorted. "'I care,'" he mimicked, echoing Luke's words spoken in the cockpit of the Falcon with a certain amount of sarcasm.
The words brought a smile to Luke's face, reminded by his younger self and the innocent, carefree days of his youth. Of course, he had been infatuated with the woman who had turned out to be his twin sister - something which filled him with a certain amount of shame, although he certainly could not have known of their relationship at the time.
But although a smile had come to Luke's face, Han scowled back at him. "Luke, for once in my life I'm being serious here. I would appreciate it if you would do the same."
Slightly surprised at the side of Han he had never really glimpsed before, Luke returned the other's gaze, wondering why his friend was behaving in such a manner - his attitude here was confusing Luke. Han was not Force sensitive - in fact he was just about as far from Force sensitive as one could be - but Luke had long ago learned not to equate Force sensitivity with being able to read another being. Some he had come across were like open books, their thoughts and feelings available to be read at any time he chose, while some, like Han, were closed and took much more effort on his part to read; not that he would ever misuse his abilities in such a way. And conversely, although he was almost completely Force blind, Han's ability to read others sometimes bordered on the uncanny, sometimes surpassing Luke's abilities, even with the aid of the Force. Could Han possibly have seen something in Luke's behavior toward Arica, which Luke had been too blind to see for himself?
"I'm not sure what you want me to tell you," Luke began hesitantly. "I can't tell you what is between Arica and me, because I don't really know myself. I've come to believe she's an amazing person, but she's still a closed book to me - she won't tell me very much about herself and although I sense no danger from her, the fact that she won't open up to me is troubling. And yet I find myself trusting her - I can't really explain it."
Han looked thoughtful as Luke haltingly tried to explain his relationship with the enigmatic Arica. No doubt he had experience in his past with a woman of Arica's type - sometimes it seemed to Luke as though there was very little Han had not experienced in his life.
"Han, why is my relationship with Arica so important?" Luke continued when Han stayed silent. "What does it have to do with you?"
"With me, nothing. I just don't want to see Leia hurt."
Now Luke was confused. "Leia?"
"Yeah, Leia," Han responded belligerently. "You know - short, brunette, princess? Leia, for crying out loud! The one you and I have been dancing around the last four years."
"I know who Leia is, Han," Luke responded with some exasperation, but still little understanding of Han's point. "What about her? What does she have to do with it?"
The look Han directed at him made Luke feel dense. "I can tell you're still crazy in love with her. I just don't want her to get hurt if you choose Arica over her."
Luke nearly choked on his drink at that point. Was Han really suggesting Leia might choose him over Han? But if she had not told Han about their conversation on Tatooine, Han may still have the impression nothing had changed between the three of them. Or he may even think she might favor Luke now that he had had several months in her company without Han's interference. And of course Han could know nothing about Luke's familial relationship with Leia - Luke was the only one alive who knew about that situation.
"Luke, I just don't want Leia to be hurt. I'll even step aside so you two can get together if that's what you want."
By now, Luke's earlier exasperation had changed to amusement. Han was clearly struggling with his feelings for Leia, which had always been strong, but his offer to put her needs above his own touched Luke - the transformation from the cocky, confident and selfish smuggler to a man in love, concerned first and foremost with the needs and desires of the woman he loved, was now complete. It was time to educate Han to the reality of the situation.
"I have to hand it to you, Han," he began with a grin, "you've certainly come a long way - from 'Either I'm going to kill her, or I'm beginning to like her' all the way to 'I'll step aside, if that's what's best for her'."
Han responded with his familiar grin. "Yeah, well don't let it get around. I have a reputation to uphold, you know."
Luke grinned in response, happy once again to the see the friend he had come to rely on and trust so much. He could think of no better person than Han to whom he could entrust his sister, no matter what may eventually happen in the days to come.
"Han, I want you to know that you have no competition from me. Leia and I... well, we are not meant for each other. Besides, you must know she's in love with you."
"Is this because of Arica showing up on the scene?"
"No, Han," Luke responded, shaking his head. "Leia and I spoke before I knew Arica even existed. We simply don't feel that way toward each other. I love Leia - always will - but I'm not 'in love' with her."
There was a long silence between the two friends, Han as he digested this new piece of information, Luke because he wanted to allow his friend to absorb what he had just been told without any interference.
"Are you sure about this, Luke?" Han finally responded. "I mean, you've been crazy about her for so long now... This is all kind of sudden, don't you thing?"
"As I said, we've already had our own conversation about this, Han. And yes I'm certain - I've felt this way for a long time now. I just recently put it together in my own mind, but I know Leia and I are not meant for each other. There's no one I'd rather see her with than you."
"Well, I guess there's only one thing to do then," Han drawled, the roguish smuggler returned and now firmly present in his demeanor. "We need to figure out how to get you and Red together."
Luke laughed. It was good to have Han back, he reflected; he had missed him all those months his friend had been in Jabba's clutches.