Yeah, I still don`t own it, but I am about to form a plan ;)

Finally! I thought I would never be able to update and write this chapter! I would definitly never have been able to do so without the huge help of mmsimpy09 and lp23 you really kept me focus and helped me going on with ideas and suggestions

Also thanks to every single review and alert and favorite, because that helped a lot too!!


Jasper was leaning against her window and watching her sleeping figure. The minute he had leaped out of her window he had closed his mind and ran. Not just from the house but more from his mind and his own self. He had drained a few deers and even found a bear a little deeper in Forks woods but yet again found himself in front of her house later on and the thoughts returned.

`What just happened?`

His own words had haunted him and repeated itself in his mind.

`Let me go!`

`Never going to happen!`

He could still feel the warmth of her body when he had pulled her into his lap. How on earth could he have done that?

`How could you let things go so far?`

Her scent had never left him, even in the few hours he had spent in the woods it had floaded around him. Had taunted him from the back of his mind and he had been afraid to get close to it again.

He had managed to ignore the building tension and the pull he started to feel towards her in the last days but after tonight?!

It would be easier if he would of at least known what was going on! Was he just lonely, did he miss Alice and tried to shift his feelings in another direction to stop his hurt? Was it more? He knew he wasn`t in love with her, he liked her of course! And he likes spending time with her! They actually had a lot in common! More that he would have ever guessed! And, ok, it was a bit more than just liking her! He had feelings for her, he was protective of her; he felt like she could be the only remaining person he had. So was it maybe a fixasion? Was that what was behind this?

Jasper sighed

Considering the fact that he was an empath he was having really big problems right now figuring out what emotions were inside him and more important her! She really had become good in shielding herself from the world and him!

Was it possible that even if he wasn`t in love with her now, he was on his way to? But how could that be? Not just because she is human! He knew she was in love with Edward, and he was in love with her. No matter what he had tried to tell her and himself he was sure that sooner or later Edward would come to his senses and return to her. Even if he had appereantly certain distractions in his mind when Jasper had left.

A growle left him thinking about it.

The question was, would she let him back in her life? He had felt her starting to close the door on her past, had felt the easing pain and feelings before the dissaster with Jacob had happened and they had crushed down on her again.

So why had she reacted the way she did tonight. It sure had felt like an argument and a probitiation that went a little beyond a friendship even brother-sister relation. And that was without the almost kiss! And suddenly it hit him and he remembered.

`Of course! You idiot!`

`You had lurled her in!`

When she had tried to push him away he had used his luring power to invite her towards him because he didn`t want to let her go but was afraid he might hurt her by tightening his grip. No wonder she had felt a pull and desire towards him!

`How could you have so stupidly toyed with her feelings?!`

He cursed himself again and again.

`You know, you sure deserve the dilemma you are in right now for that!`

Jasper shock his head. How should he explain that to her? He sure couldn`t just walk up to her and tell her to just ignore and forget it. And when he was at it tell her to better not trust any feelings she was about to have being around him at all because on top of being a vampire with luring powers, he was an empath and could let her feel anything he was feeling if he doesn`t control his bondaries!

`Great job, Jasper! What a way to establish trust!`

The next two days past in an awkward uneventful blur. None of them wanted to adress what happened trying to just ignore the issue. Still both of them awaited more or less afraid if the other would want or try to approach it.

The fact that they found themselves covered in school assignment and homework helped to keep their mind off things to. At least hers since he probably did already every possible assigment any teacher could come up with a dozend of times.

The most funniest one, at least for their privat humour, was a history assignment about a pressentation of an asspect of the Civil War. Bella, who knew at this point that Jasper had been a soldier, or better the youngest Major of Texas in this war, suggested they could do a little `fake`interview where they could tell how the dayly routin of a soldier through wartime was. After a few jokes and comments they had told Angela who was in their group too and she was open to the idea. At the moment all three of them sat on a table in the library discussing how they would want to work their idea out. Angela had suggested to include the routins of nurses to, since they were close to the battlefields and soldiers, too, she had liked their idea but still was a little thoughtful about where they would get enough informations from.

„Lucky for us we have an expert about this topic in the group!"

Bella answered without thinking and Jasper stiffened for a second.

„Uh, I mean the way you are into history! You are probably the only one I know who is into this stuff the way you are!"

`Ok, this was close!`

Jasper rose a brow.

„Yeah, I love history, it`s always good to know the past to understand the present and maybe see where the future is heading!"

Now it was on Bella to stiffen and her head spun towards him. She dared in his eyes.

„So, would it be possible for you to share this knowledg with me to get a little inside about what is going on?"

„The thing with history is that you have to see it from the point of view of the people who lived at the time to fully understand their actions!"

„And do you see yourselve capable of doing this?"

„Honestly no! But I still like to hear the thoughts of the people who have experienced it themselves to form my opinion!"

„But just because you have expirienced something doesn`t mean you have to acknowledge it!"

„What are you trying to say?"
„I am trying to say that sometimes especially the people who have esperienced it themselves are the one who want to leave it in the dark!"

„So, would you consider this and respect their wishes when you form your own questions or would you prefer to find out what it was that they are leaving in the dark and didn`t want to talk about?"

„I think it would be better to concentrate on the commen and proven facts! I can imagine that the people who had experienced theese things would have a good reason why they left it in the dark in the first place!"

`Ok, you have to stop this now Bella!! Remember Angela!`

`But why do I have the feeling we are suddenly talking about something entirely else?`

`Ignore it! Remember our discussion! He can feel what is going on in you so just don`t let anything go on at all! Focus!`

„ I mean, that sometimes it is better to ignore certain aspects to be able to go on with your life especially when you are a soldier at war!"

„I see! Maybe you are right with that!" Jasper finally answered giving both the feeling of having reached a mutual agreement.

She turned towards Angela and found her staring at both of them.

„Ok, that is an interesting approach!" Angela started while looking intensly at Bella and then turned towards Jasper. „So, maybe you have some recommendation which books would be good to start our research with, then?!"

`Bless your soul!`Bella sighted reliefed.

They continued working on the assignment for another couple of hours. Jasper had went through the library to look for usefull books which made Bella laugh inside. As if there would be any book in here who could teach Jasper something new about this particular topic. But since they would have to keep up apperences having at least a few books laying in front of him would be a good start.

Having finished with more than the rare construction about their presentation they decided to leave it there. It was already late and starting to get dark outside and Jasper insisted on giving Angela a ride home, too. He also had promised to work on some answeres at home using his own `collection`, and told them he would bring some of them with him tomorrow. Angela had taken the book she had already been working with about nurses in war home and wanted to look further into it. They agreed to meet the day after tomorrow again to assemble what each of them had found out.

After they took Angela home silence fell upon them again. Still Bella felt more at ease since their agreement in the library. She still wasn`t sure if they had both agreed on the same things but could only hope that this ridiculous situation would just vanish.

"So, want me to use my accent?"

"Huh?" Bella asked confused after having been ripped out of her thoughts.

Jasper chuckled.

"I asked if you want me to let my southern accent shine through during the presentation. Would things make even more realistic!"

"Jasper, I am interviewing you about your own life! I highly doubt there would be anything more realistic than letting you `play`the soldier!"

"I could wear my uniform, too!" He chuckled even more and she glared at him.

"Are you mocking me? Do you really think you of all people would be in the possition to do this now?"

"Ha, I think there wouldn`t be anyone more suitable to do so!"

„Is that so? You do realize that you have much more to lose here than I do, right!"

„Oh, come on Bella, have a little fun!" He tried again and hit her with a wave of euphoria. Bella started grinning until a thought stroke her.

„Yes, Sir, Major Sir! I will, Sir!" She answered and they both started laughing. The tension that had been between them the last days eased away and she hoped that everything would get to normal again.

And in a way it did. She asked Jasper to tell her a few more stories about his human life the next day. All in the sake of her education and they started to form their own hidden and subtle humour in answering the questions they would use.

But both minds still came back from time to time to the intimate minutes they had shared in her room a few days ago.

They could ignore, hide or pretend as much as they would like, sooner or later they would have to face what was going on around them.