The sound of voices is far away, as if she is underwater and all she can hear is garbled sound fighting against the waves. Sound waves against water waves. Distorting. Messing. Unable to comprehend anything.
The sounds start to clarify as she works her way up to consciousness. Voices. Distinct but unrecognizable.
She opens her eyes and immediately shuts them, shielding against the light that stabbed into her brain.
Focuses on breathing, trying to ignore the pain throbbing and throbbing at the base of her skull.
She tries again. Blinking furiously until the light dims down from brilliant brightness to dullness.
"She's coming to, doc," a female voice says next to her head.
Elizabeth turns her eyes in that direction. The woman looking down is unfamiliar, a young face with curly brown hair and a pert and upturned nose.
A male's face, a face she knows, joins the woman's.
Mathis smiles. "Good to see you back, Elizabeth."
Elizabeth blinks and tries to swallow but her throat is beyond dry and she can barely gather enough saliva to make the physical action of swallowing happen.
The woman's face disappears and then reappears. Elizabeth catches sight of a glass of water in her hand.
Mathis leans towards Elizabeth, pulling an arm underneath her neck, to tilt her head.
The woman places the straw between Elizabeth's lips and Elizabeth drinks the water.
It is sparkling cold and sweet.
She drinks several sips before the woman takes it away and Mathis lays her head back on the pillow.
"How?" Elizabeth manages, her head foggy but her memory serving to remind her that she was on a planet, running away from imprisonment.
"A combination of efforts," Mathis replies. "But you are not quite up to that yet, sleep and then I will have them debrief you."
Elizabeth barely smiles at the formal nature of the word "debrief," but the smile falls, quickly and suddenly.
"John," she says, struggling to move then, sit up, look around the room.
Mathis places a hand on her chest, holding her down on the bed. She cannot resist the weight of his hand though it is minimal. She feels weak. Irritatingly weak.
"He's fine," Mathis replies. Elizabeth misses the ever-so-slight edge to his voice.
Elizabeth allows herself to lie back down. She is very tired, unconsciousness tugging and tugging at her eyes.
She closes them. The voices swirling about her as she falls into sleep.
*
Mathis emerges from the makeshift medical room. His strides are long, firm, the slight limp not immediately noticeable. In his face is a carefully controlled blankness but along his shoulders is a stiffness that is unknown to the man. In his stomach a rolling and in his chest a heat he does not recognize but knows must be suppressed anger.
No. Fury. Fury at witnessing her arrival through the Stargate, nearly dead in that man's arms, her breathing barely registering and her heart rate too low. Too low. And too cold. And too much of what had happened could have killed her and it makes him furious.
Cool and collected and logical Mathis. Furious.
He finds them in the East briefing room. They are sitting around a large oval table and look up when he enters into the room.
"How is she?"
Larrin is the one who talks first but Mathis does not miss Colonel Sheppard rising up slightly from his seat at his arrival.
'Bastard' is the arrow thought piercing Mathis' mind and it surprises him. The feeling behind a word he doesn't know if he's ever used in his life.
He directs his attention to Larrin.
"Dr. Weir has woken and she will survive. It was touch and go for quite some time but she is out of danger and will recover. She suffered from acute hypothermia and abrasions, but I was able to stabilize her body temperature and take care of the other medical emergencies."
Mathis feels the collective sigh in the room though not a sound is made. He glances about; at Dr. McKay and the woman and large man—Ronon and Teyla—and at the other man, the leader of the expedition, Mr. Woolsey. And then John Sheppard.
John Sheppard's face is blank. No emotion, not a single sign of relief, unlike his companions whose relief is apparent on their faces. Even the big man, though largely silent and more brute then anything shows signs of real relief at the news.
But not Sheppard. Not the Colonel.
Mathis wonders at it. If the lack of emotion is real or if it is a controlled reaction.
Because he'd seen an emotional man.
He'd witnessed the man at Elizabeth's bed.
Sheppard had slipped into the room, when no one was supposed to be in the medical wing and Mathis had witnessed it from his office. Seen it and had left. Backing out of the room as the man's head bowed over the woman's body, his hand covering hers.
He wondered at them then and wonders at them now.
Anger. Fury. Something else along his rib cage.
"Other medical emergencies?" McKay picks up on, sitting slightly forward in his seat. Several computer pads are laid out before him on the table.
Mathis is pulled away from his quick pattern of thoughts.
"She had a near lethal dose of poison in her blood stream," Mathis replied.
"From the cut on her leg?" Mr. Woolsey asks.
Mathis looks at the man, the leader of the expedition. He shakes his head. "I really couldn't tell you, though I would think that unlikely. It was either administered intravenously or maybe through food."
"But Colonel Sheppard does not have the same poison in his system?" Teyla asks.
Mathis shakes head. "No. He suffered from slight hypothermia but that was all."
"Could you determine anything from blood samples? Anything about those who administered them?" Larrin asks.
Mathis looks at Larrin, sitting back in her chair. Her face is also composed but he knows her well and sees the lines of stress along her eyes and chin. She has not slept and is tense. Though others cannot tell, Mathis has known the woman for many years and notices the signs. Notices and realizes guilt at not having checked in on her.
"They are advanced, medically speaking and I dare say technologically speaking, though I am not for certain," Mathis replies.
"They are," Rodney answers for Mathis. All eyes turn towards him.
Rodney points to one of the tablets in front of him. "Obviously they have a power source that far surpasses what most in this galaxy even know exists, beside the Ancients and the Wraith that is, and they know how to manipulate the gate, though not as well as they would have liked because I was able to create a work around, and that, I might add, was a stroke of genius…"
"But they are advanced," John cuts Rodney off. "Their weapons are unlike anything I have ever seen."
"Yes, yes, you said. Blue fire," Rodney cuts John off this time.
"Like lightning," John replies. "Nothing that we have ever come across before."
"Neither have we," Larrin interjects. She leans forward in her seat. "Malroy, that is the name that he gave Dr. Weir and as Sheppard said, something that is human but not human."
"Like a vampire," John replies.
Larrin shakes her head. "I'm not familiar with that term."
"Kind of like Wraith but instead of sucking life, sucks blood. Cold. Creepy. Cannot come out during the day to play," John lists off.
"But not Wraith?" Larrin asks.
John shrugs, looks over to Teyla.
Teyla shakes her head. "No, I don't believe so."
Mathis wonders how Teyla would know if the creature was Wraith or not but is not entirely surprised when Larrin does not press the other woman.
"So, we have no idea who these, or this thing is, just that they need Atlantis," Larrin's voice is grim. "Seems like everyone needs Atlantis."'
Rodney frowns as he plays with his tablets. Mathis watches the other scientist, knowing that Rodney has made some kind of connection.
"But you said that they don't want Atlantis, not for the Ancients weapons or protection, but because of some kind of information in the Ancient's database?" Rodney asks.
John nods. "That's what the lady said. She was creepy too."
"What, couldn't charm her?" Rodney piques but only in a halfway manner, his fingers flying across his tablet.
"What are you thinking?" Mr. Woolsey asks, watching the scientist as everyone else in the room does.
Rodney looks up, a frown between his eyes. "I don't know, but I need to access Earth."
Mr. Woolsey nods then looks to Larrin at the head of the table.
"Of course," Larrin says, standing up. "I will make a heading back to the planet."
The rest of the room stands up as Larrin heads to the door. Mathis watches as John jogs after her, the others dispersing behind them.
Mathis turns when he feels a presence at his elbow, looking down at Teyla. Her brown eyes are concerned.
"Dr. Weir will be all right?" Teyla asks.
Mathis nods, feeling wariness along his bones. It has been a long couple of days. "Yes, now, though it is a near a miracle that she survived."
"Of course. She was in very bad shape when we found them."
Mathis feels a warming towards the woman. That this woman cares for Elizabeth is apparent in her features, in the worry in her eyes.
"You did well, administering the leaflet like you did. It kept her heart going," Mathis says.
Teyla smiles slightly. "It was mostly John. I think that if he had not done what he did she would have died long before I got there."
Mathis feels the anger then, strong and precise at the center of his chest but does not express it, does not tell this woman that he blames the Colonel for putting Elizabeth in a situation where she was so close to dying. Instead he excuses himself from Teyla, citing his need to check on Elizabeth.
Teyla inclines her head. "Of course. Let me know if there is anything at all I can do."
Mathis puts a hand on the woman's shoulder and squeezes. "Thank you."
Teyla watches the tall man walk down the hallway, away from her, the limp slight in his gate. She wonders at him. And wonders at the hatred she saw in his eyes when she mentioned John.
Teyla turns to head to the bridge. To talk to John on what she witnessed. To ask him if he understands Mathis' dislike.
Or not. Because what would it accomplish.
Teyla shakes her head, filing the information away for another time.
Walking away, Mathis does not realize Teyla saw what she saw and so it does not bother him, focusing instead on the need to control the anger. The tightness in his gut. Flowing in and out of breath and flowing with his step. Finding the center of power at the place in his chest and moving outwards and through.
Breathing.
The anger is controlled by the time he makes his way back to the medical area. He walks over to where Elizabeth lays in a too big makeshift hospital bed.
He stands there for a moment, looking down at the woman lying there. She seems fragile underneath the white sheet, her dark hair dark against the white of the fabric but also against the white of her skin. She was so cold when they had first walked through the gate. Cold and near death. In fact, he thought she was dead, lying limp in John's arms when he first approached them, medical bag in hand.
The feeling at the thought had nearly knocked him over.
He wonders at the feeling now, looking down at the woman. Yes, there is a feeling of responsibility towards Elizabeth. He did bring her back. Bring her body and her person back together, into one unit. And that required a lot of time, a lot of understanding and a true realization of who Dr. Elizabeth Weir really is. What makes her exist in the way that she exists.
But there is more than just a feeling of responsibility. He recognizes her. He admires her strength, a strength of will that he recognizes in himself. A need to exist in order to help, if for no other reason but to help. To exist in order to make the universe a better place.
And she was so very fragile, a delicate web of reality that he had methodically placed piece by piece back into existence.
And that reality had almost been shattered. Destroyed.
Mathis moves a piece of hair from Elizabeth's forehead, staring for a moment.
He turns and goes back to his office.
*
"Bullets and then blue fire, that just doesn't make sense," Rodney is saying to John as they eat several hours later.
John shakes his head. "I don't know. I'm telling you that it was blue fire and it was unlike anything I've ever seen. Maybe the original attack was by the locals."
"And vampires?" Rodney continues before stuffing his mouth with a huge bite of some kind of fruit pie.
John raises an eyebrow at the man sitting across from him. "I'm just saying. This Malroy character couldn't see us when we requested it during the day but had no problems at night and he was all cold and weird."
"Doesn't mean he's a vampire," Rodney said with his mouth full.
"No. But it might."
Rodney finishes chewing and then takes a sip of his coffee. "Well, whatever, I want to know what they want from the Atlantis database."
"Were you able to get a hold of Radek?"
Rodney nods. "Yes, but he is useless. I might have to head back."
John watches Rodney take another huge bite of pie. It is normal somehow, watching Rodney eat and in the normalcy is comfort.
"What about you? You okay?" Rodney asks through his food.
John nods. "Why?"
Rodney shrugs. "Dunno. You seemed pretty shaken up when we found you."
John winces inwardly. Remembering and not wanting to remember.
He thought she died at one point.
Doesn't want to think about it.
"I was freezing to death," John replies instead.
Rodney studies John's face and John lets him, keeping himself still underneath the gaze and pretending like he doesn't know what Rodney is doing.
"A piece of luck anyway," John continues.
"Us finding you?"
John nods. "Yep. Thought you were dead."
Rodney grimaces. "Almost died. One of those bullets came close, grazing my hair. I felt the wind off of it."
"And then finding Teyla and Ronon," John continues, watching Rodney.
Rodney blushes and John grins.
"Yes well, that was lucky," Rodney mutters.
John heard the story from Teyla, how her and Ronon had been heading towards John and Elizabeth's camp when they had literally stumbled over Rodney's sleeping form. The story, Teyla said, was that Rodney was never released by the captors, never having been found in the first place. After Elizabeth was hit with a tranquilizer dart, he ran. After finding that the control crystal had been taken from the DHD, he worked on the DHD from a hiding hole less then ten feet away from the structure for two days.
As Rodney explains it, ingenuity and for some reason just happening to have another control crystal on hand allowed him to fix the DHD. John still isn't sure why Rodney had a control crystal with him but isn't asking questions.
"Would you have left without us?" John asks.
Rodney scowls. "I would have brought back reinforcements."
John grins. "Oh."
Rodney's scowl turns into a glare.
"What are you two discussing so avidly?" Teyla asks, sitting down with them, a tray of food in hand. Ronon follows behind her, sitting down across from her and next to Rodney.
Rodney pulls his food tray closer to him and farther away from Ronon.
"About how you stumbled upon Rodney," John replies.
Teyla smiles. Rodney grunts in between bites of pie, now being consumed at an increased rate.
John shakes his head, turning to look away from Rodney and towards Teyla. "So, what have the two of you been up to?"
Teyla glances over at Ronon who is also consuming his food at a rapid rate. "Ronon was training with some of the warriors and I was sitting with Elizabeth."
"Is she awake?" John asks.
Teyla looks at John and her in her look is something that makes him wonder if he was too eager in his question.
"Yes. She woke an hour ago."
John nods. Tries to stay seated. Can't.
"Okay. Well, I will leave you to lunch. I need to talk with Larrin."
Teyla smiles in reply. The two men look up and grunt at him.
John pushes his chair in and heads out of the mess hall, depositing his trash as he goes.
The three at the table watch John walk away.
"Elizabeth?" Rodney asks, swallowing his final bite of pie.
"Of course," Teyla answers.
John doesn't realize he is so transparent but doesn't think about it at the same time.
He turns down a hallway and then into the medical area. A quick glance shows him that Mathis is in his office and the nurse, Reca, is nowhere around.
His eyes fall on the woman in bed. A flash of disappointment slashes across his face to see Elizabeth's eyes closed. The thought of turning around crosses his mind but he dismisses it almost immediately, walking forward.
She sleeps on her side, curled up slightly and he is glad to see that some color has returned to her cheeks, though she still looks tiny in the bed.
He stands there for a moment and he plans to only stand there for a moment but then she opens her eyes.
The smile she gives him is slow and steady.
It tugs.
"Hi," she answers, her voice raw sounding.
John reaches for the chair at the wall and pulls it towards the bed. He sits down so his face is level with her face.
"How you feeling?"
Elizabeth closes her eyes. Dark eyelashes against pale cheeks.
She opens them, green eyes catching at his and holding.
"Tired."
John flashes a grin. "I can imagine."
John traces her face with his eyes. Noticing the details. Every one of them.
"You had me worried there for awhile," he continues.
"Sorry," she replies.
John shrugs, slightly, nonchalantly. "Just like old times."
A memory of standing in the rain, screaming at Kola through a walky-talky.
He shakes it off. "But, Teyla says that you're good now."
"I guess," Elizabeth replies. She turns from her side to her back and then tries to sit up.
John reaches for her. To help her. And then pauses. Unsure. Hovering.
She manages on her own and he returns to the chair.
He notices her hand shakes when she pushes her hair from her face.
"So, do we know anything yet?" She asks.
John recognizes her voice. The voice that leads to business in order to stay away from other things.
"Not yet. No one seems to recognize my description."
"And the information, the information Malroy wanted?"
"Rodney is working on it."
Elizabeth smiles slightly. "Of course."
Silence falls between them. Sudden and complete and uncomfortable.
"Teyla told me that you saved my life," Elizabeth finally says.
"How much do you remember?"
Elizabeth pauses, looking away from him and behind his head. To something there. Far away. John fights the instinct to look over his shoulder, to maybe catch a glimpse of what it is she sees.
"Not much. I remember jumping and hitting the water but everything else is pretty blurry."
John feels the tension in his shoulders release. He doesn't know why but he is glad she doesn't remember the cave.
Though nothing happened
Nothing like that at least.
But the memory still makes something go queasy in his stomach.
Elizabeth refocuses on the man sitting next to her. The thing is, she remembers more than that but knows if John does not reply to the situation, does not bring notice to the situation, he probably views something of the situation as inappropriate, as crossing a line, even if those lines do not necessarily exist any more.
But there are other lines. Lines that are defined by the inactive nannites still in her system. A knowledge of what she isn't anymore and what she was but not really.
She knows. So she doesn't make mention of the memory of having John wrapped around her. Of feeling his heart against her cheek. Listening to the beat of his life until she fell into fevered dreams.
Fevered nightmares.
She closes her eyes for a moment but reopens them immediately when she hears John move.
He stands now.
She isn't surprised.
"I'll let you rest."
Elizabeth nods. She doesn't want rest. Rest means thinking and she doesn't want to think.
At least not about what it is she thinks about.
She wants to be busy. Figure out who Malroy is. Who the women is. And what the information is that the man and woman are so desperate to get a hold of. And how that information translates to weaponry. How it translates as something to be used against the Wraith.
"Okay," is all she says.
John pauses. Hesitates and then gives her a smile. "Glad to see you're back among the living."
"Me too," she replies.
John nods slightly. Pauses and then turns and leaves the room.
Elizabeth watches him go. The familiar gate. The familiar stride. Familiar.
She watches him until he disappears and then closes her eyes.
What a mess, she thinks.