SariSpy56: Welcome back to the House of Awesome!
Chris: And we've got great reviews from Protector of Men Roy.
Grandpa Archie: Now like I said earlier, my story is about video games and history.
Johnny: Video games good! History bad!
()()()()()
Camera
Grandpa Archie: I just don't get it. People used to believe in things back in my days even war but now it's just kids playing indoors, well except my grandson Kick though. No wonder why he's different than most kids who pefered to play indoors rather than outdoors.
End camera.
()()()()()
Gordon: So old man? What's your story called again?
Grandpa Archie: *sigh* It's called "Brad of Duty: Johnny at War."
Gordon: Oh.
Just then the phone rang and Bling-Bling Boy the bartender gets the phone.
Bling-Bling Boy: Hello?
Brad: Hi is Al there?
Bling-Bling Boy: Al who?
Brad: Al C. Holic.
Bling-Bling Boy: Is Al C. Holic there? Alcholic? Is there an alcholic there?
The audience laugh at the prank call. Bling-Bling Boy gets upset.
Bling-Bling Boy: Wait a minute! You're that same prank caller from the bar. Now you're doing it in House of Awesome. Listen here you white bellied jackass! When I get ahold of you, I'm gonna cut your stomach open and pull out your intestines!
The audience laugh even more.
SariSpy56: Oh boy! Let's roll the clips of the prank calls in Bling-Bling Tavern! Roll it Wade!
Wade: On it dudette!
SariSpy56: And we're gonna call this segment "Ultimate Prank Calls!" Enjoy folks cause this'll be shown at certain times!
()()()()()
Clip
Brad is in Kick's room sitting beside a very sick Kick. He had an idea to keep Kick entertained - prank calling. So he dialed the numbers to Bling-Bling's Tavern.
Bling-Bling Boy: Bling-Bling's Tavern.
Brad: Hello. Is Al there?
Bling-Bling Boy: Al?
Brad: Yeah Al. Last name Cholic.
Bling-Bling Boy: Let me check. Phone call for Al. Alcholic. Is there an alcoholic here?
Smart Alec: Does Dukey count? (laughs)
Bling-Bling Boy: Oh wait a minute. Listen here you cracked up, white bellied jackass! When I find out who you are, I'm gonna kill you!
()()()()()
Bling-Bling Boy: Bling-Bling's Tavern.
Brad: Hello is Mike there? Last name Crotch.
Bling-Bling Boy: Hold on a minute. Mike Crotch! Mike Crotch! Has anybody seen my crotch?
The bar regulars laugh out loud.
Bling-Bling Boy: Listen here you overweight, white bellied, no good jackass! When I get my hands on you, I'm gonna chop your head right off and give it to my sweet Susan Test!
Dukey: Now that's just plain gross.
Beezy: Tell me about it. Heh-heh.
()()()()()
Bling-Bling Boy: Hello?
Brad: Hi is Ms. Problem here? First initials B.O.
Bling-Bling Boy: Just a second. Is B.O. Problem here? B.O. Problem. Hey everybody! Do I have a B.O. Problem here?
Smart Alec: You're sure do!
The bar regulars laugh out loud at this.
Bling-Bling Boy: Oh (BLEEP!) Listen here you (BLEEP) no good son of a (BLEEP)! When I find out who you are, I'm gonna (BLEEP) your (BLEEP) and eat your liver!
Brad: Man that fat kid can really curse out loud.
Bling-Bling Boy: HEY!
Brad hangs up.
()()()()()
Bling-Bling Boy: Bling-Bling's Tavern.
Brad: Hi is my friend Amanda here? Last name Hugandkiss
Bling-Bling Boy: Just a second. Amanda Hugandkiss. Hey I'm looking for a man to hug and kiss! Why can't I find a man to hug and kiss?
Smart Alec: Maybe your standards are too high!
The bar regulars laugh.
Bling-Bling Boy: Oh (BLEEP!) If I find out who you are, I'm gonna chop your legs right off and eat both your intestines and brain.
Brad: Uh yeah this is Gordon Gibbles here and my address is 713 Dakota Sack (*author's note - I made up the address*)
Bling-Bling Boy: AHA! You've just made a mistake buster! Beezy, don't drink the beer from the tap until I come back ya hear?
Beezy: Wait what?
Seventeen minutes later, Bling-Bling Boy arrived at Kick Buttowski's house with a knife in his hand. He burst open the door like a mad man! He saw Gordon Gibbles gloating to Kick Buttowski who apparently is tied up and gagged and is sitting on the couch. Brad on the other hand is higing in the kitchen so that he won't get caught by Gordon.
Bling-Bling Boy: Alright! Who in here is Gordon Gibbles?
Gordon: That would be me you overweight loser!
Bling-Bling Boy: Now listen here you rotten, spoiled son of a (BLEEP)! I'm gonna (BLEEP) kill you for prank calling me at the bar!
Gordon: Oh please don't kill me! I'm too scared and too beautiful to die!
Bling-Bling Boy: Whoa! I was only trying to scare you not to literally kill you here! Well it's back to the bar I go!
Then Bling-Bling Boy left.
()()()()()
Bling-Bling Boy: Bling-Bling's Tavern.
Brad: Hi I'm looking for Seymore. Last name Butt.
Bling-Bling Boy: Hold on I'll check. Hey is Seymore here? Seymore Butt? Hey everybody I want to see more butt!
The bar regulars laugh their heads off.
Bling-Bling Boy: What the (BLEEP!) When I get ahold of you, I'm gonna pull out your heart and mail it to Iraq!
End clip
()()()()()
The audience laugh and applaude at the same time.
Grandpa Archie: Can we get on with the story now?
SariSpy56: Certainly sir.
Grandpa Archie: Okay.
Brad of Duty: Johnny at War
It was just a normal day in Mellowbrook. Well yeah it's normal alright, but on this particular day, a certain teenager by the name of Brad Buttowski is entering the Game Store. As he walks through the hallways looking for an interesting game, he notices something new.
Brad: Alright! "Call of Duty: World at War" video game is finally here! Yeah Brad!
So Brad walks up to the cashier where he saw a nerdy, pimpled-faced collage boy.
Brad: Hey buddy! I want to buy this sweet, damned video game if you please?
Cashier: I have a name y'know! It's Jeremy and I'm sorry, but this game is M rated. You're too young to play this.
Brad: Too young! I'm like 16 years old so I'm old enough to play this damned game! I'm not a little kid anymore and I'm not afraid of this game!
Jeremy: Um you have to be at least 18 to play this game and there's no way you're going to convince me to give this to you!
Brad: Tell ya what. If you let me buy this game, I'll arrange a date between you and a sister of my girlfriend. All expences paid.
Jeremy: Whoa! I did not know that you have a girlfriend but since you said that she has a sister who is hot, the game's yours.
Brad: Yeah Brad!
()()()()()
Meanwhile at Porkbelly, a certain Johnny Test is also entering the Game Store and caught his eyes on the new video game.
Johnny: AWESOME! "Call of Duty: World at War" is finally here and it's mine!
So Johnny walks up to the cashier where he saw an overweight man (*I'll just call him Bloaty.*)
Johnny: Hey there buddy. I would like to by this sweet game here?
Bloaty: No can do Johnny! This game is rated M and you're too young to play this!
Johnny: And tell me why I can't have it?
Bloaty: Because it's for players who are 18 and over and are mature enough to play this. You're 11 and you're not mature enough.
Johnny: Oh well then I guess I can't tell you that you're having a date with a very hot lady from the Grey Embassy.
Bloaty: Really?
Johnny: Yeah. My cousin from Mellowbrook just captured that babe and is holding her hostage as of now in her lab.
Bloaty: Ooh I must see this hot babe. Here's the game and I'm off to finally get a date with the hot babe from the Grey Embassy. Ta!
Then Bloaty went off.
()()()()()
Meanwhile at Mellowbrook, Brad is kicking his computer since the new game didn't seem to be working. And as Brad keeps on kicking the computer, Kick Buttowski saw him and walks into Brad's room.
Brad: What do you want dillweed? Can't you see that I'm busy here?
Kick: Well I can see the problem with that computer of yours Brad.
Brad: Prove it.
Kick looks behind the computer and then at Brad.
Kick: Here's your problem. You need a new video card. Your old one won't work with this game.
Brad: Really eh?
Kick: And it's expensive nowadays.
Brad: I know how to get a free one! Wait right here.
2 hours later, Brad was holding a video card in his hand as he entered his room. Kick also entered his room so he can set it up.
Kick: Where did you get that video card with a star and moon on it?
Brad (evil grin on his face): Johnny's dorky sisters.
()()()()()
Susan and Mary were in their lab and tried to turn on their computer, but it didn't. Susan looked behind the computer and saw a huge hole behind the computer. Brad ripped the video card out of their computer. They saw the words "Yeah Brad!" on their computer in graffiti style.
Susan: OH MY GOD! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS BRAD BUTTOWSKI!
()()()()()
Kick finished installing the video card and suddenly the game was on. Brad was very happy at the sight of the really cool graphics.
Brad: Sweet graphics!
Kick: Whatever. I'm outta here.
Brad: By the way dillweed, since when were you so smart on computers?
Kick: Not telling ya.
Then Kick left the room.
()()()()()
Three days later, while Brad is being addicted to the game, his Grandpa Archie walked into the room and stands right in front of the TV with a firm look on his face causing Brad to stop the game.
Brad: What the hell old timer! I was at the part where I'm going to (BLEEP!) the enemy here!
Grandpa Archie: Watch your mouth young man and you're wasting your time on that piece of junk! Back in my days, World War II is a serious thing and both the Japanese and the Germans don't want to get killed by us Americans.
Brad: Whatever, you're just trying to get me to stop the game and do some school lessons. Like that is ever going to work!
Grandpa Archie: I'm outta here! People used to believe in things back in my time, now it's kids playing indoors. Speaking of kids, where the heck is Kick anyway?
()()()()()
Meanwhile at Porkbelly, Johnny came home from school and when he was about to play Call of Duty again in his room, he saw his neat freak dad Hugh being addicted to the game.
Johnny: Whoa! Didn't see that coming.
But when Johnny spoke those words, Hugh pauses the game and turns around to see Johnny standing behind him.
Hugh: Oh hi son. I'm just playing this game and then I'm off to cook some meatloaf.
Johnny: I see.
Hugh: Do you mind playing this game with me? I'm kinda lonely when you're at school plus this M rated game is so sweet.
Johnny: I don't mind at all.
A few days later, Johnny and Hugh became so addicted to the game that Lila, Susan and Mary had to cook their own dinner. Just then, Susan and Mary walk up to Johnny's room.
Susan: Hey why don't you guys hang out with your friends?
Hugh: We are Susan.
Hugh plays a troop and shot Harold's soldier in the game.
Susan: I meant outside dad.
Mary: Plus shouldn't you be at school Johnny?
Johnny: Mr. Teacherman gave all the kids a month off since he's got his own Call of Duty game at home.
Susan: And what will happn if Dark Vegan plans on taking over the Earth?
Johnny: He has his own game and is too addicted to conquer the world as of right now.
Susan: I wonder why?
()()()()()
In Dark Vegan's home, Dark Vegan is too busy playing the Call of Duty game. He didn't noticed that his daughter Jillian walked into his room.
Jillian: Dad! Dinner's ready.
Dark Vegan: Well I'm kinda busy here sweetheart!
Jillian: We're having toast for dinner.
Dark Vegan: Toast? I love toast. I'm coming.
()()()()()
Meanwhile, Brad, Pantsy, Horace and Harold were playing multiplayer on the Call of Duty game. Brad's soldier shot Bling-Bling Boy's soldier.
Bling-Bling Boy (through word chat): Hey no fair! You have cheat codes on your side!
Brad (through word chat): Yeah Brad! By the way, is is there a Al C. Holic online?
Bling-Bling Boy: Let me see. Is anyone here an Alcoholic? An alcoholic?
Everyone but Brad said yes through chat.
Bling Bling Boy: Hey! Wait a minute! You're that same prank caller who uses the phone. Now your chatting online. Oh, you're so DEAD you white bellied jackass!
Brad: What are you going to do about it?
Bling-Bling Boy: This!
Bling-Bling Boy's soldier was strangling Brad's soldier. As Bling-Bling Boy's soldier was strangling Brad's soldier, Pantsy was strangling Brad for eating the last chocolate chip cookie. Brad's soldier, and Brad himself were strangled at the same time.
Bling-Bling Boy: Eh forget it. I'll deal with you later.
Bling-Bling Boy then logged off.
()()()()()
As for Gunther, he is too busy playing Call of Duty game that he's unable to help Kick with his stunts since Kick's ironically the only boy who didn't get addicted to the game. He also didn't notice that his mother walks inside his room and caused him to stop the game.
Helga: Gunther dear, why don't you go play outside with Kick instead of playing this addictive game? The game's not good for our Viking heritage.
But Gunther is too busy to hear what Helga said.
Helga: I give up. Magnus!
Magnus: Yes dear?
Helga: Gunther won't stop playing that evil video game!
Magnus: I'll deal with him right now! GUNTHER!
Gunther paused the game and looks at his father.
Gunther: Yeah?
Magnus: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS PIECE OF CRAP? IS IT GOOD FOR OUR VIKING HERITAGE? BWA!
Gunther: Um...
Magnus: LET ME TRY IT!
But once Magnus grabs the remote, he starts to become too addicted to the game.
Magnus: I SAY THIS GAME'S FUN! BWA, BWA!
Helga: God dammit! Now Magnus' addicted as well. I'm outta here.
()()()()()
Meanwhile at Ronaldo's place, Ronaldo was playing the game with Harold, Brad, Johnny, Hugh, Mouth, Pantsy, Horace, Magnus and Gunther on computer. Ronaldo seemed to do better than the other players as nerds have an eagle eye and know how far and strong a bullet can be in the game.
Ronaldo: Take that you worthless bunch of jackasses! Maybe someday you'll have science on your side.
Johnny (chatting online): Whatever. I'm outta here for now. The game's killing me.
Johnny logged off and went to the lab for a break.
Ronaldo: Ha ha! You'll never defeat the Dark One. Ha ha!
But all of a sudden, the screen changes into a red screen.
Ronaldo: What is that thing?
?: You'll do as I say slave. Repeat after me! "I will obey and serve Wacko forever!"
Ronaldo (in a sudden trance): I ... will ... obey ... and serve ...Wacko ... forever.
Then the screen changes into a small yet crazy man. It was Wacko the evil toymaker of Porkbelly.
Wacko: Now keep on saying that sentence until you're fully brainwashed is that understood?
Ronaldo: Yes master.
Wacko: Oh goody! Now with all men in my control, I will finally get a date with a lovely woman and no one can stop me! MWA HA HA HA HA HA!
()()()()()
The next day, Ms. Chicarelli decided to go for a walk with Oskar and what they didn't see was an army of mind controlled men as if they were brainless zombies.
Ms. Chicarelli: AHHH! THE MEN ARE GOING TO OVERTHROW THE WOMEN! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!
A few hours later, Mellowbrook is being invaded and populated by Wacko's mind controlled men. Most of the women (and old people) had to find sanctuary in their houses and keep all of Wacko's men outside. As for the women in the Buttowski household, they baricated the entire house. Among the people inside the house is Honey, Kendall, Ms. Chicarelli, Susan, Mary, Lila, Grandpa Archie (he's an old man), Dukey, Brianna, Wacky Jackie, January, Selena, Hallow and Kick (cause again he's the only boy not addicted to the game.)
Jackie: What are we to do?
Susan: Don't panic Jackie. We'll find a way to return this town to normal.
Kendall: Yeah but there's something that I don't really get at all.
Everyone: What?
Kendall: If all men were addicted to the game made by a insane loonatic called Wacko, they how come Kick isn't addicted to the game in the first place?
Mary: Yeah. That's something we don't know.
Grandpa Archie: We may never know.
Kick: I say we snap those men out of their trance!
Hallow: I second that!
Dukey: So do I cause I want my Johnny back!
Honey: Did that dog just talk?
Susan, Mary, January, Selena, Hallow, Kick, Dukey, Kendall and Jackie: No.
Grandpa Archie: Relax. I know he does.
Susan and Mary: You do?
Grandpa Archie: I've met him before in Area 51
Grandpa Archie is on a vacation in Porkbelly when all of a sudden, Mr. Black and Mr. White cornered him and dragged the old man into the van.
Mr. Black: We need you to come with us Archie Buttowski!
Mr. White: It's a matter of national security!
Grandp Archie: Such rude men in black dragging an innocent elder like me to the van. How unfortunate.
A few hours later, Grandpa Archie is brought to Area 51 and presented before the General and Dukey (who is disguising as a soldier with a rare hair disorder.)
General: Welcome Archie Buttowski to Area 51!
Grandpa Archie: And why am I here where I should be visiting an old friend of mine a few years ago?
General: You're here for a reason Archie! We've been looking at your profile for many years even when you were just a paper boy. We need your help.
Grandpa Archie: Why do you need my help? I'm just an old man with no experiences.
Dukey: That may be true sir but you're not like most old men. Even if you are old, you're still very active as if you were 50 years younger.
Grandpa Archie: Did that dog just talk?
General, Mr. Black, Mr. White and Dukey: No.
Grandpa Archie: Don't lie.
Dukey: Fine! I'm a talking dog created by two red-haired geniuses!
Grandpa Archie: Do they go by the name Susan and Mary Test?
Dukey: Yeah and how do you know that?
Grandpa Archie: Their cousin January.
Dukey: Oh
Grandpa Archie: It was a long story to tell.
Dukey: Okay now back to the plan. What are the things that video game addicts hate most?
Kick: Homework, school, chores, outside world and really cold water.
Kendall: Cold water?
Kick: Got soaked when I was addicted to video games once.
Kendall: Oh.
Honey: Now we need to load a lot of cold water in the water guns. Give me some time to do that.
Susan and Mary: We'll help.
Grandpa Archie: And we don't want to hurt the men like we did to the Japanese and the Germans back in my days.
Susan: Whatever.
()()()()()
Outside the house, the mind controlled men are scattering around town as if they were zombies. As for Wacko, he is enjoying a date with a hot babe.
Wacko: Life is good. And there are no men fighting against me for girls. Am I such a clever man?
Hot Babe: You sure are my man.
?: Not so fast Wacko!
Wacko: Who?
Kick Buttowski and the remaining people of Mellowbrook aim their water guns at Wacko which causes the hot babe to retreat.
Wacko: A shrimp boy leading a revolution? I though I took care of all the young boys and men!
Kick: Well first of all, I'm no shrimp! And second of all, I'm not affected by the game that you created!
Everyone gasp at this.
Susan: How did Kick know about that?
As Kick installs the video car that Brad stole from Susan and Mary, he notices a symbol on the game. It is a large W with a golden crown on it.
Kick: Wacko.
?:Hey dillweed! Are you done yet?
Kick: Almost done Brad.
Brad: Well get a move on!
Kick finished installing the video card and suddenly the game was on. Brad was very happy at the sight of the really cool graphics.
Brad: Sweet graphics!
Kick: Whatever. I'm outta here.
Brad: By the way dillweed, since when were you so smart on computers?
Kick: Not telling ya.
Then Kick left the room.
Grandpa Archie: He know it.
Wacko: Well you're not getting the men back! MWA HA HA HA HA!
But he got soaked big time!
Wacko: OW! It's freezing!
As Wacko cries about his suit ruined by water, everyone else soak all the men with wet water and change them back to normal.
Brad: What the hell happened here?
Grandpa Archie: Let's just say that you've learned a valuable lesson here.
But the war ain't over yet.
Wacko: You may have won this round shrimp boy, but I'll be back!
Just then, Wacko's phone rang.
Wacko: Hello?
Brad: Hi is my friend Amanda here? Last name Hugandkiss
Wacko: Just a second. Amanda Hugandkiss. Hey I'm looking for a man to hug and kiss! Why can't I find a man to hug and kiss?
Johnny: Maybe your standards are too high!
The townspeople laugh.
Wacko: Oh (BLEEP!) If I find out who you are, I'm gonna kill you!
January: Well you're gonna have to wait since you're going to prison again!
Wacko: Oh (BLEEP!)
()()()()()
Extra Scene
Wacko spends most of his time in prison as a the bartender. Just then, the phone rang.
Wacko: Maximun Security Prison here.
?: Hi I'm looking for my friend Ms. Tinkles. First name Iwanna.
Wacko: Just a second. Iwanna Tinkle! Okay everyone put down your beers. I want a tinkle!
The prisoners laugh out loud.
Wacko: Listen here you blondie jackass! When I get out of this prison, I'm gonna mail your brain to Egypt!
Then Wacko hung up.
At the Buttowski household, the caller is revealed to be Johnny and Brad is right beside him laughing his head off.
Brad: Nice work dude.
Johnny: Thanks and it's too funny.
The End
Grandpa Archie: And that's the end of my story. The End.
SariSpy56: Wow that is like too funny but overall it's good.
Grandpa Archie: Why thank you.
Chris: And now we need a well deserving break!
SariSpy56: I agree and we need at least 2 reviews before we do the next story.
Brianna: I've got a story to tell!
SariSpy56: Really?
Brianna: Yeah and I called mine, "My Fair Lady"
SariSpy56: Okay and before we go, a new guest will be coming right after Brianna's story. He's in his 20s, has a ringtail and his last name starts with a C. If you can manage to figure it out, you'll tell your own story right here after Brianna's story! And remember to stay AWESOME!