So pretty, so smart. Such a waste of a young heart. What a pity, what a sham. What's the matter with you man? Don't you see it's wrong? Can't you get it right? Out of mind and out of sight.

GRACE

To say the least I was confused. Yesterday everyone had been nice and things seemed okay. Today…it was like a war zone. It was a polite war at least. What a thought to have. I shook my head to myself. Tyler beat me to the art room, probably because Elena was dragging her feet practically the whole way. I didn't want to be rude so I said nothing. I threw myself into the seat next to him unceremoniously.
"Did I like, do something wrong?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, that's not how they always act, is it?" He looked down and chewed on his lip for a moment before answering.
"Uh, no. Not really. Caroline's just excitable."
"And what was up with you and Jeremy anyway?" He still didn't look at me.
"You saw that huh?"
"I'm pretty sure China saw that." I wasn't going to admit that Caroline's lecture on fashion had nearly made me cry and I'd been watching him and Jeremy almost the entire lunch period just for entertainment. "Not to mention," I continued, "that was a perfectly good waste of peas." His cheeks turned the slightest shade of pink. I was tempted to laugh. Very, very tempted.
"I was bored," he admitted. I couldn't stop myself, I laughed.
"What did Stefan ever do to you?" I asked when I caught my breath. He rolled his eyes slightly and finally looked at me, giving a tiny smirk. My stomach flipped in response.
"It's a long story." Whatever you say oh perfectly sculpted lips.

Class started and we set to work on a still life of a sphere. It was a while before I realized that he'd completely avoided the question about Jeremy. Was there something going on? They obviously had a history. And there was definitely…something between them. I wondered if Jeremy would say anything. Probably not. I had a feeling that whatever it was, it ran deep. But maybe I was just imagining things. What could possibly be going on? I shook the thought away before I could come up with any conspiracy theories.
"You guys don't have to be so quiet. Frankly it's a little creepy," Ms. Carson announced.
"So you're going to the grill tonight?"
"I guess so," I allowed, "I have the feeling that they'd just kidnap me if I tried to cancel. They're not going to tie me down and paint my fingernails are they?"
"No," Tyler smiled, "they won't tie you down at least."
"Gee, thanks for comforting me." I sighed. I would definitely need a power nap when I got home. Today was exhausting. "What are you up to tonight?"
"Oh I don't know," he smirked, "there's a few options."
"Would any of them include crashing a girl's night?" I asked, surprised by my words. I must really be tired.
"Hm," he let out thoughtfully, "I don't know. Elena might sic Stefan on me and Matt is my friend so it would be awkward if I had to punch him."
"Oh," I let out. "Yeah, that makes sense." I sighed again. Maybe Jeremy would be willing to crash the party. Then again…did I really want to risk pissing off Caroline? Hm. That was highly debatable. "I probably don't want to be on Caroline's bad side either." He shot me a sympathetic smile before going back to his shading.

I followed his lead and continued working on my sketch as well. As my pencil moved over the paper I thought about the entire situation in my head. Maybe I should just be glad that they wanted to hang out with me? I mean, yesterday they all seemed pretty cool. Hopefully tonight would be more like yesterday. If nothing else I could tell them that I had unpacking to do. I barely stopped myself from groaning at the thought. I hadn't really started that project yet. Good excuse. That was totally going to be my escape hatch. I felt better now that I had a plan. Tyler stopped working and started packing up his stuff, warning me that the period was almost over.
"Okay, well, if I'm still alive tomorrow, I'll see you." He just smiled and nodded as the bell rang. I remained in my seat as the room emptied. Once Ms. Carson was gone I stood and put my phone on the speaker dock. Today was my music. I was tired and Jeremy's screamo would only give me a headache.
"Hey Grace," Jeremy said warmly, taking the seat next to mine again.
"Hi," I responded quietly, sitting again.
"You okay?"
"Eh," I let out, letting my head fall onto my hands, "honestly I'm exhausted." I turned to him, still holding my head. "Caroline's scary." He chuckled softly.
"She can be, yeah. You said you couldn't sleep?" he questioned, arching an eyebrow and regarding me carefully. I let my hands drop and went back to working on my sketch.
"I had a nightmare about my dad," I admitted quietly. There was something about Jeremy. I felt like I could tell him. I actually kind of wanted to. I wanted to get it over with as quickly as possible though. "One night he went out, just to get some milk and the convenience store that he went to got robbed." I took a deep breath. Jeremy didn't say anything, waiting for me to finish. "He walked in on it. The robber got scared and shot him. Then he panicked and shot the clerk too. My dad died alone." My eyes watered and I focused on the pencil in my hand. Nothing could have prepared me for what he said next.
"I lost my parents in a car accident." I dropped the pencil and covered my mouth with my hands. "There was a bad storm and they went off the bridge. Elena was in the car. Stefan saved her life." Tears slipped out of my eyes.
"Jeremy, oh my God, I'm so sorry." He nodded, the ghost of a sad smile playing on his lips.
"Me too."

He reached out and hugged me. I went willingly, wrapping my arms around his neck before wiping my cheeks. He rubbed a hand up and down my back. "I'm sorry I brought it up," he murmured after a few moments.
"It's okay," I said, pulling back and sniffling. "I have to tell people at some point. And I wanted to tell you."
"Change of subject?" he asked quietly. I nodded.
"Most definitely." Under the lingering sadness and tension I actually felt kind of warm and fuzzy. I blamed that on Jeremy unequivocally.
"What are you working on?" I pointed with a finger to the sphere. "Ah, still life. The thrilling beginnings."
"Have to start somewhere," I murmured. "What are you working on?" He just shrugged.
"Don't know yet. What are we listening to by the way?"
"Back of buddy, I can cancel that ipod wedding at any time. There's nothing wrong with Yellowcard." He held up both hands in surrender.
"Just asking." The conversation had fallen back into normality so quickly I almost forgot we'd just been discussing what we'd been discussing. Jeremy was magic I decided then. Pure, unadulterated magic.
"So you already know my plans for the night, what are yours?" He shrugged.
"Not sure yet."
"Tyler said the same thing. Is there something you two aren't telling me?"
"What? No," he said, fumbling with his sketchbook suddenly. Suspicion returned.
"Whatever you say J." He chuckled.
"Nobody calls me J." I shrugged.
"Well now I do. Deal with it."

Giving people stupid nicknames is what you did with your friends. I was friends with Tyler and Jeremy. Nothing more. I needed to remember that. So Tyler was PonyBoy and Jeremy was J. PB and J. I laughed to myself suddenly. So unintentional and yet so perfect.
"What?" Jeremy questioned. Yeah, like I was gonna admit that one out loud.
"Nothing."
"Yeah okay," he let out, rolling his eyes. I chuckled again.
"I'm just really bad at this." Ah, the fine art of improvisation. He scooted his chair closer and examined my paper. I tensed slightly, my hand stopping totally.
"Here," he said, laying his hand over mine, "relax your hand and use longer strokes, like this," he moved his hand over mine then, sketching for me. I let him do it, moving my eyes to his face after a second. Oh God. "Better?" he asked, looking over at me. Oh God. I completely lost control of my brain at that point.
"Yeah," I let out on a shallow breath, nodding once. He didn't move away, hand tightening infinitesimally. My breath caught then. Dear sweet God. It was the most exquisite pain of indecision. Pull away, or stay here in this perfect purgatory? Like I had a chance… Jeremy leaned closer and I watched, unable to do anything else. He was a hair's width away, close enough that I could feel his slight breaths. So close, so perfectly, amazingly close. He was going to kiss me, I realized the fact belatedly. No. No, he couldn't kiss me! I desperately wanted him to, almost as much as I needed him not to. It was too much. Too quickly. I wasn't used to this. I couldn't do this. "Friends!" I blurted, pulling back. Jeremy froze totally and I slid my hand from his, standing and covering my flaming cheeks. Please tell me that did not just happen. Please. Pretty please? Let me wake up now. Rewind to five minutes ago…anything. Jeremy stood slowly, half turning away. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed.
"I'm sorry," we said at the same time. Wait what was he sorry for? What was I sorry for? I was really, really confused. He turned back around. "If you want to be friends, I understand."
"I just…" Fuck. This was just a huge mess now. "I mean maybe at some point," no stop, don't say that, "I just-I think it's too soon?" Why did I end that as a question. Fucking hell.
"No, of course, we just met. I understand." Of course he did. Because he has to be as amazing as possible about all of this.

I didn't think I had ever been more uncomfortable in my life. From the looks of things, Jeremy hadn't either. We both remained standing, trying to avoid looking at each other.
"I don't really…do this," I whispered. "I just, I always screw things up. I really am sorry Jeremy."
"It's okay," he smiled slightly. Even I could tell it was forced. "You can still call me J if you want." Fuck. Suddenly I wanted to cry again. Why hadn't I just let him kiss me? I really had wanted him to and now he was just being so sweet and perfect. Now it was messed up anyways. Why did this happen to me?
"Okay," I agreed shakily. It's better if we're friends. It's better if we're friends. Better, better, better. I didn't want to hurt him. I didn't want to get my hopes up either. I didn't want to get hurt, of course. Fuck. What the fuck? I really, really liked him. Apparently he liked me at least a little bit. So why couldn't I make this work? The bell rang and I jumped slightly. Jeremy sighed and picked up his sketchbook and slid it into his bag.
"I'll see you later?"
"Yeah, of course." I nodded. "I'm sorry," I muttered again.
"It's no problem, really." God, I almost believed him.

A/N: Because I love you guys. Also, this one's pretty long. I'm proud of it. I just can't help myself twining all these characters together. I know it's going a little slow. Good things come to those who wait.