Okay, so here is the promised 'Rorschach chapter'. If you all like it I may do one more near the end of this fanfic. A little warning ahead of time, I know like 90% of you readers don't mind in the least..., but this chapter may come off as a little more 'slashy' then some of the others. Nothing physical though. (sorry ;P lol)

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It was some time around two in the afternoon when the sun would find its way most directly into Daniel Dreiberg's guest room window. The light spilled over Rorschach's face, warming the fabric of his mask. He shifted slightly, bringing his knees towards his chest as it was his habit to sleep curled up. A sharp pain brought him quickly to awareness, and he straightened a bit, relaxing the pressure on his ribcage. His body ached terribly, even more so then it had in previous days, and he remembered the events of the night before. He had strained himself more then he should have, but there was no other choice, Daniel was in danger.

He pushed himself up onto his elbow and looked around. He felt a sudden shock hit him as he took in the sight of Daniel, snoring softly, sprawled sideways across the bottom of the bed. He was still in his costume with the exception of the hood, and he was oddly positioned with his feet on the floor. Rorschach shook his head trying to recall the moments before he'd fallen asleep and why his partner was in bed with him, even if he was at the very bottom edge. He recalled Daniel carrying him up the stairs and laying him down, then sitting for a moment. They were both exhausted, he must have just laid back and fallen asleep there. He was still in uniform after all.

Rorschach's nerves subsided after he reasoned with all certainty that nothing 'unnatural' had occurred the night before. He stared for a long while at his partner's sleeping form, his body relaxed, limbs sprawled out, lips slightly parted, entirely at piece. Rorschach never slept like that. Even if he fell asleep stretched out, which he rarely did, he always woke on his side, curled tightly. He did not know what it felt like to be so calm, even in sleep his world was on fire, and his mind burned. As Rorschach's eyes lingered on his partner, he became aware of a growing uncomfortable tightness in his chest and throat, a feeling he had experienced before in Daniel's presence but always tried his best to ignore completely.

Eventually he crawled forward and lifted a trembling hand. He did not like how his hands shook, he wished they'd be still, but it seemed his muscles had not the strength to hold his own limbs steady. Daniel said it would go away, once he over came his anemia. Rorschach hoped he was right. He poked at the sleeping man then drew back quickly, sitting patiently, waiting for him to awaken. Daniel twitched, then squinted in the blinding early afternoon sun. His head turned to the side and looked upon Rorschach before pushing himself up on his elbows.

"Damn man…I'm sorry…I must've fallen asleep here. I remember carrying you up to this room…Then I think I just kinda passed out. Aaaaahhhgghh…" He groaned and rubbed at his side. "I do not want to see what that bruise looks like…"

"You are hurt?" Rorschach asked leaning forward.

"I got shot…its alright though, good body armor." Daniel gave his stomach a light pat. "You're probably hurting worse then me. How are you looking under there? Still lots of bruising?"

Rorschach felt a surge of heat to the back of his neck. The thought of his exposed body made him uncomfortable. "…Alright, yes…still a lot of bruises…, There might be more now…cuts are still there, healing though." he answered nervously.

Daniel nodded. "Do you mind if I have a look? I just want to make sure nothing is infected…you aren't…um,...well you've only bathed like twice in the past week, you probably should be keeping those wounds cleaner…"

Rorschach shifted nervously. He did not like being touched, he was very ticklish for one thing, a fact he preferred to keep to himself, and human contact summoned up feelings he did not understand and was not comfortable with. Why is Daniel doing this to me so early?…Just want breakfast… he can examine me later… He thought bitterly.

"Want to shower first…hungry too…you can check later…" He replied quietly. If this were only a few days prior Rorschach would've likely snarled his reply contemptuously, but after the past week, and all that had transpired, there was no venom in him for Daniel. Not for Daniel who had so freely called him friend, who had cared for him, who had watched over him, and who had held him in his arms without any reservations, as if it were completely natural, as if he loved him.

"Alright, that sounds good Ror, I'll get breakfast started…well I guess its more like lunch now. You can get in the shower." Dan replied and stood up, stretching. "Do you need help at all?"

Rorschach shook his head. He loathed being assisted in his daily tasks, and anything involving the bathroom was humiliating beyond all reason. He knew Daniel was well meaning, but there was a part of him that would rather smash his head on the tile and bleed to death then be assisted bathing himself, shaving, or any other such activities.

Once Daniel had left the room, Rorschach proceeded to the bathroom, a ball of clean clothing under his arm. He leaned on the wall as he walked, his left leg still sore from the bullet wound in his thigh, and badly strained from the previous night's 'adventure'. He shut the door firmly behind him. He considered locking it but changed his mind. If he were to pass out and crack his skull, he might as well make it easier for Daniel to find the body.

Rorschach let out a ragged sigh and began to undress. He hated the way everything hurt, the way he was plagued with sharp pains every time he bent his torso too far, how his head felt strange and achy when he would tilt it certain ways, how his stomach was still so tender from the deep laceration. He loathed how vulnerable he knew he was, how poorly he'd be able to defend himself if need be. He removed his shirt first, followed by his pants and underwear, last of all his mask.

His eyes fell on his own feet below him, somewhat large for his size, and very bony with ugly crooked toes, broken a few times in the past. His gaze moved up the entirety of his awkward body, his scarred knees, narrow hips, unimpressive genitals, and pale, freckled, nearly hairless torso. He looked sadly atrophied, the week of inactivity already taking a toll. He had never liked his body, but in his best condition at least his compact muscular figure served to give him some sense of security. Now however, it appeared to be waning and he was reminded of the thin pitiful boy he was before becoming a crime fighter.

He looked up to meet his own gaze in the mirror. Rorschach had little love for his body, but it was nowhere near the abhorrence he felt every time he met the ruined blue eyes of Walter Kovacs. He exhaled slowly. The haggard face stared back at him, thin, weathered, destroyed, the product of everything he hated. He had been told his entire life that it was an ugly face, and he believed it whole-heartedly. The bones were too prominent, the cheeks sunken, the hair was a strange vivid red, the ears stuck out, and there were too many freckles. Worst of all it was a face that still bore resonance of an abused child and of a sad wretched little man working for minimum wage in the garment district. It was not the face of Rorschach.

Still the blue eyes stared desperately back at him, and a weak voice echoed innocently from the very deepest part of his consciousness. I want to meet Daniel…Please…Just want him to know me… maybe…he'll still like me…maybe…Maybe he'll---

"No…" Rorschach threatened in a low hiss. "You are dead Walter…and even if you weren't…he'd never like you. Nobody ever has…You are…worthless."

Bitterly, he tore himself away from the mirror, disgust welling up inside him like a sickness. He clumsily staggered into the shower and turned the water on. It was icy cold at first, causing every hair on his body to stand on edge, and his fair skin to turn a shade paler to ashy white. He wrapped his arms tightly around himself and shivered, his nails digging painfully into his upper arms. His head was bent, dead eyes fixed on the chill drops of water running down his nose. He could feel a building pain in his chest and his throat clenched.

"Daniel…"

His partner's name rested on his lips like the final line of a prayer. The falling water grew warmer as he sunk to his knees, his eyes remaining fixed on the hypnotic pattern created by the drops as they hit the tub and spiraled down the drain.

Spiraling away,… no escape…down… down… down…everything spinning down…alone.

His vision blurred, his throat tightened, and his lungs burned.

"Why… Why is Walter still being punished? Haven't I been good?" He whimpered so quietly even he could scarcely hear himself amidst the sound of the running water. "Daniel is so kind…He said... he said I was his best friend… nobody ever, ever said that about me…"He choked on every word. His face fell into his hands, his shoulders pitched forward, and he curled as tightly as he could before the pain in his ribs and stomach became unbearable.

"Just want to take the face off…Just want…to…be…..."

***

Rorschach exited the bathroom, clean and shaven. He slipped on the mask as he limped across the hallway, not wanting to risk being seen. Upon reaching his room he shut the door tightly behind him and proceeded to the bed, laying down carefully on his back, staring up at the ceiling. He pulled off his mask, wanting to allow his hair a chance to dry before he put it back on. He liked how his skin felt fresh and warm, relieved of the usual itchiness and discomfort that came from poor hygiene. Over the past months his bathing habits had declined such that he was beginning to forget what it felt like to be clean. After quitting his day job, he could not afford to live in anything other then a tiny single room in a dilapidated old tenement building, never renovated since its construction around the turn of the century. It only had one bathroom per floor, so he had to share it with three other apartments. This made him very uncomfortable, so consequentially he tended to avoid showering until it was absolutely necessary, and did so very quickly. He wondered a moment about his apartment, if anyone had noticed how long he'd been gone. He doubted they had.

He reached under his pillow and pulled out a small flip-top yellow note pad. He has stolen it from Daniel's desk and used it as his journal over the past week. It was his habit to record his days, it helped him deal with his thoughts, make sense of things. He paged through it, absently reading over the entries.

Rorschach's Journal

Tuesday October 7th , 1975 (morning)

Finally able to sit up long enough to write. Daniel has been overbearing. In pain, just want to sleep, keeps trying to make me drink water. I am feeling very sick. Have a cut that runs the entire length of my torso. Daniel says my organs were visible, bad thought, I don't like anyone seeing my insides. Tired now, need to sleep more.

Rorschach's Journal

Tuesday October 7th , 1975 (evening)

Violated today. Miss Juspeczyk came by. She meant well, brought cookies, and medicine. Did not want her to see me like this, do not want anyone to. I was angry with Daniel, tried to leave. Couldn't take it anymore, this humiliation. Daniel stopped me, grabbed me, and laid me back down. I Don't know what to write about this, mixed feelings. Daniel. Says he wants to know who I am, says he's happy to have me around. Probably lying to keep me from leaving. Hurts too much to sit up any longer. Will write more tomorrow.

Rorschach's Journal

Wednesday October 8th , 1975

Violated again. Daniel changed my bandages, cleaned wounds. Degrading. Body sometimes reacts strangely on its own when touched, can't control it. Don't like things I can't control, so would prefer not to be touched. Daniel means no harm, just wants to make me well. I don't believe his intentions were licentious. He says my freckles are 'human'. Human,… not ugly. Most likely lying.

Rorschach's Journal

Thursday October 9th , 1975

Slept a lot today, Daniel comes in to bother me every few hours. He talks a lot about many things, for my part I just lay in bed. Occasionally interject when he says something relevant, but mostly just listen. Daniel deserves more interesting company.

Rorschach's Journal

Friday October 10th , 1975 (early afternoon)

Uneventful so far. Feeling slightly better. Turns out Miss Juspeczyk makes very good cookies. Delicious, lots of chocolate chips. I have eaten five of them so far today. Must remember to thank her again once this is over. Daniel wants to play a board game, I will humor him.

Rorschach's Journal

Saturday October 11th , 1975

Daniel is out on patrol. For the better. Do not like the idea of scum infesting the city while we sit at home. I drank alcohol last night, it was good, did not expect it to be. Sweet, like tangerines, or apples in the fall when they taste the best. Finished bottle, woke up feeling a little sick. Daniel says he's having nightmares about the incident. Daniel is soft as always. I should not be hard on him though, sounds like he saw too much. Don't really remember myself, was unconscious for the most part. Bored, can't sleep. Nothing really to write about. Want something to read.

Rorschach's Journal

Sunday October 12th , 1975

Violated yet again. Close call, identity nearly compromised. Was naked in front of Daniel, the entirety of my disgusting body visible to him. Reacted quickly, but fell, ended up in Daniel's arms without clothes, skin wet and slippery. Indecent, perverse situation. Still haunting me. Angry with Daniel, should've knocked. Very rude.

Rorschach's Journal

Monday October 13th , 1975

Told Daniel my age over breakfast. It took a moment to remember. Don't think much about the time I've spent on this wretched earth. Feels too long already. Enjoyed breakfast very much, Daniel makes delicious pancakes, and buys better maple syrup then what is offered in diners. We talked about the old days, when we first met. Daniel smiles a lot when he talks, wonder if he is really that happy…I think I might have smiled too, but he could not see it…better that way.

Rorschach slid the notepad back under his pillow before allowing himself to collapse against the sheets, exhaling slowly, his ribcage aching as his chest sunk. His blue eyes focused blankly on the ceiling, and he was still, listening intently to his own raspy breathing, and the rhythmic beat of his pulse whispering in his veins. In the silence he was reminded of a clock. Tick tick tick tick…

"Time's running out." He said softly in a voice that felt like it belonged to someone else.

There was a sharp knock at the door and Rorschach responded by quickly pulling his mask over his head.

"Daniel?…you can come in."

Daniel entered, smiling brightly.

"All clean?" He asked cheerfully.

Rorschach nodded, slowly pushing himself up into a seated position.

"I've got food ready for lunch downstairs. There's stuff for sandwiches, and I made some iced tea, extra sweet. I was thinking of you."

I was thinking of you. The words lingered in Rorschach's mind as he looked up at his partner, the unpleasant tightness in his chest resurfacing. For a moment he said nothing, hanging on the simple statement, and then nervously cleared his throat.

"Thank you…" He whispered.

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Oh-ho-ho. So much angst in this one. Little note about my description of Kovacs, even though this fic is more 'book based' I gave him blue eyes like in the movie. I think he's supposed to have brown eyes in the GN, but its kinda up for interpretation since the color is so wild. I just love him with blue eyes, it somehow seems more fitting, and I can never get the image of JEH in the 'death scene' out of my head. JEH really became my human vision of Walter and those desperate blue eyes are just too perfect.