Fun Fact: I'm visiting LA at the same time the show my uncle hosts is on, so I'll be watching it with him. He and my aunt are comedians, and my cousins are adorable. I can't wait to go~

Well, today's story is based on "Beijing's Moves Point to Europe Aid" by Owen Fletcher seen in the good ol' WSJ on June 24, 2011.

As usual, I own zip. Zero. Nada. Goose eggs. (What book is that from? I read it in second grade; that's all I remember about it.)

"Hello, Hungary speaking! Sorry, but you've reached my voicemail. I'll probably get to the phone sooner or later, unless you're Prussia, in which case I will send pyromaniacs to your basement hideout with petrol and matches. Please leave a message after the beep, and have a great day!"

-Beeeeeep-

"早上好、Hungary. It's China, aru. I was considering visiting your house today to consider investing in some more European debt. Please call back when you get this. Have a nice day, aru."

"This is England, or the representative for the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Not Iggy. If this is America, Sealand, or France, please press the 'End' button on your phone and leave a message. If this is anyone else, please press three and you will be redirected to my work line. Thank you."

(-Beep-) Please hold on one moment while your call is redirected.

"Why is this taking so long? I don't even like the Beatles, aru."

"Hello, England speaking. Sorry, but I'm in a meeting right now. Please leave your message here and I'll reach you sooner or later. Have a good one."

"早上好、 Ahen. It's me, China, aru. I think I'm going to start buying more of your debt instead of America's, so I was wondering if you would have me over in a day or two for some meetings, aru. Please call back."

"Germany speaking. I either cannot or will not speak to you at the moment. Please judge which is which wisely before deciding whether or not to leave a message. Danke schön."

-Beeeeeeeeeep-

"早上好、Germany. China here. I have developed an interest in buying eurozone debt, aru. I'm planning a short tour of Europe, so may I stay over to talk about it? Please call back as soon as you can, aru."

China stared at his cell phone. Europeans really like avoiding each other, don't they. He'd never do that with any of his siblings. But they avoided him too. Oh, so it wasn't just the Europeans.

He boarded his high-speed corporate jet (which was decorated with a Shinatty face just for him!) and wondered if he'd have to fly back as soon as he got to Hungary. Hmm, maybe he'd stop at a restaurant first or visit an anime shop.

Somewhere over Armenia/Azerbaijan/Georgia/way too freaking close to Russia for comfort, a flight attendant approached him with a "Sir, memos for you."

Hi! Okay, I'll meet you at the Wi-Fi restaurant by the airport. I'm bringing my laptop with me because I NEED TO WIN THE CLICK CONTEST. Kay, back to work. ~Hungary

Of course you may visit London. Please call with your schedule as soon as you know what it is. And dear Lord, don't bring Korea with you this time. I don't know how many more "Scones originated in Korea"-like comments I can take. Thank you. ~England.

Yes. Please let me know what day and time you'll be over and I will meet you. We can use Conference Room Five. Best of luck for your travels. ~Germany

We'll be landing on the Pest side in an hour or so. Please be ready for your first meeting. I checked what you packed and replaced your Hello Kitty suits with proper Western ones. Please be more sensible next time. ~Your boss

"But she's Shinatty, not Hello Kitty, aru..." China lamented with a sigh. "Guess I better get changed."

The clicking contest? Compete at www (dot) clickclickclick (dot) com. My netbook's virus protection just expired, and it didn't do anything; I swear it's safe. Hima talked about it in Teh Blog the other day. Hungary always wins. That and her Tamagochi funerals- did I choose the weirdest country to cosplay as or what? XD