Disclaimer : I do not own any character of (The Last of Us) TLOU is owned by Naughty Dog, but all the Oc character are from my invention.

A/N : Okay, the twins wins, so maria and Tommy are going to have their hand full, je, je, je. Thanks for all the people that vote in the first poll, so now I going to post the second one. That is going to be the gender of the babies; so you going to chose now what the gender you like for the babies. The poll is going to be open for 2 weeks, so please vote as soon as you can, and thanks for participated in this is really help.

Chapter 11 : The Consequences of bad Decisions

Ellie just stays sitting on the couch with a surprised expression on her face. She wasn't expecting something like this, and she's not ready for it, either.

"Joel, you should go to bed - you need more time to recover," says Ellie while she tries to get up from the couch.

"I`m fine enough to talk, and we need to do that," says Joel, stopping her from getting up from the couch.

"Then I'm not ready for this, so if you don't mind, I need to go and prepare something to eat."

"That can wait, and we need to discuss whatever is wrong with you, so please stop pretending that everything's okay, when we know that it's not true."

"So you want to talk about what is wrong with me?… Okay, let's talk now. What do you want first… unnn? You want to talk about what you did to me, how much you hurt me?" says Ellie, with a high voice now.

"Ellie, I know that I hurt you, I'm not going to deny that, but you must understand that I needed to go at that time. I had to do it to protect you, and-"

"YOU WANT TO PROTECT ME?" Ellie yells at him. "You lied to me - you said that you love me, and promised me that you were never going to leave me. And what's the first thing you do, unnn? You break those promises, and leave me alone... do you know how much that hurt?"

"Ellie, I didn't leave because I don't love you - I do, but there was something I had to do to keep you safe, to keep the danger out of Jackson," says Joel, lowering his head.

"Oh yeah, you had to do something… you just needed to go and finish the job that you started almost 4 years ago, right?" says Ellie, looking at him now with angry eyes.

"Four years ago? What are you are talking a-"

"Don't try to deny anything, I know what you did in Salt Lake City, oh… of course, that was another lie."

"Oh, shit… Tommy told you about that? I was hoping to-"

"WHAT? That he wasn't going to tell me about that either?... Fuck, Joel when are you going to stop lying? And all those people you killed... the doctors, the nurses, and… Fuck! You even killed Marlene… She was my mother's friend, she was the only family I had, and you killed her," says Ellie with some tears forming in her eyes.

"Ellie, I'm sorry, but those assholes... they wanted to kill you. I don't know what Tommy told you, but you need to understand what they were going to do to you, and-"

"They were going to find the cure, to free this world from the virus and make all this a better place."

"Yeah, that's what that bit- Marlene - told you?... the same shit she said to all the people they killed, or wanted to join them? I wasn't going to let them kill you, just like that, and for what?" says Joel, trying to justify himself.

"You killed all those people, and maybe they could've found the cure by using me. You knew from the beginning that that was my mission. So what gives you the right to decide that you need to take that from me?" says Ellie, standing up from the couch and going to the kitchen.

"Ellie, you don't understand - they were going to kill you for nothing. They didn't wake you up to ask you if you wanted to give your life for a lost cause. You almost drowned when you were trying to help me get out of that bus. I tried to revive you, but they found us and knocked me out. When I woke up a few hours later, that Marlene came to the room they were keeping me in. She told me that to find the cure they needed to take something from your brain, and that it was going to kill you," Joel starts to explain; he gets up too and follows her to the kitchen.

"If they could find a cure for the virus, you should've let them," says Ellie, stopping at the sink.

"They don't know shit!... I was there. I asked her to wake you up and let me see you, but she said that keeping you asleep would be better... that they needed to do what was best for all of the people. She said that my job was done, and sent me out with an escort, and I'm pretty sure that they weren't letting me get out of there alive. So I decided to take you out of there, one way or another," says Joel, stopping a few feet behind her.

"That's the point, Joel - that wasn't your decision. It's what I wanted, I told you that when we got close to the hospital," says Ellie as she turns around to face him.

"Yeah, you said that you wanted to finish the mission no matter what. But they were going to kill you for nothing."

"You don't know that, and now we'll never know, because you killed them all."

"Ellie, they were just experimenting. They didn't know shit!... They didn't even know if what you had was going to work or not. I found some recordings that explained that they did that to other immune people they found, and it didn't work. They killed them too, and for nothing - you heard what Dr. Wilson said about that. Your immunity wasn't enough to find a cure."

"Yeah, but he also said that he doesn't have the right equipment to be sure about that, either. So maybe the Fireflies had the right equipment to know for sure."

"That's all a dream, Ellie. If there was a cure for the virus, the government has more doctors and scientists, so they should've found the cure for the virus a long time ago."

"Joel, I don't know if there's a god up there, but I have… this for a reason, and it can't be for nothing, and Marlene- why did you have to kill her? And why didn't you tell me all this when I woke up? Why did you lie to me, and swear that what you told me was true?" says Ellie, with some tears falling from her eyes, and walking away from him.

"I'm sorry… that I lied to you, but I knew that if I told you what happened there, you were going to be mad at me. Not that I don't deserve that. But I didn't want to lose you. I fell in love with you... at first I just thought of you as a replacement for the daughter I lost. But after time passed, it became more than that. And Marlene, she was going to stop me, and kill me just to keep you there. She was going to kill you, and for what… a possibility of a cure?"

"Even so, you should've told me, and the funny thing is that you said you didn't want to lose me. But you abandoned me in Jackson to go out and try to kill more Fireflies," says Ellie, taking her winter coat and putting it on.

"Ellie- where are you going?" asks Joel, following her to the front door.

"Out!- I need some fresh air, Joel," says Ellie, opening the door.

"Are you crazy? It's still snowing out there... you're going to freeze to death if you go out," says Joel, getting close to her to try to stop her.

"What do you care, Joel - you just abandoned me, and from what I've seen here, you don't have any intention of coming back for me," says Ellie, looking at him with some tears running out of her eyes.

"Ellie- please, you need to understand... I was only trying to protect you."

"Well, I don't need you for that anymore, Joel, I can take care of myself. So why don't you stay here alone, and don't follow me. I need time to think," Ellie says to him, and then she leaves the cabin and closes the door behind her, leaving Joel alone in the cabin.

(A few hours later)

Ellie went outside, and that is something that scares Joel a little. Because even if the storm is light at the moment and it's just snowing a little, he knows that it's still cold out there. Joel knows that she's coming back. She doesn't take anything with her; Ellie`s guns and things are in the living room, and with all that snow that's been falling down for the past few days, it's impossible to get down off the mountain. So the only thing he can do for now is wait for her to come back to the cabin.

He knows that he fucked up the thing between Ellie and him. And now that she knows about what happened in Salt Lake City, he needs to deal with the consequences of that. He needs to talk to her again, but for now, he knows that she needs more time for herself. So after she takes all this time, he will try to talk to her again. Joel knows that all this is going to take time to fix things up, but he is going to try.

A few minutes later, Ellie is sitting on a cliff that's close to the cabin, just a few feet on the side. The cabin was well-built in that place. Whoever the person was that built it knew what he was doing. The cabin has a cliff on one side and a mountain close to the back and the other side. There is only one trail close to the front, and it's the only way to get up here, so the cabin is easy to defend in case of an attack.

Joel must have been taken by surprise when those people attacked him, even though he killed five of them before I arrived. He should be able to defend this place better. He almost died, and even though I'm mad at him right now, I'd be lost without him, so why is it so difficult to forgive him? I left Jackson to find him. All the people I killed on this journey, just to get to him… and now, here I am again, thinking about him like it's all going to hell. But he could be dead, if I hadn't found him in time, so why is it so difficult now just to look at him? I know that he hurt me when he left, but I didn't stop thinking about him for the past two and a half years, so why is this so hard and painful.

Ellie just seems to be lost in her thoughts, thinking of what to do next. Then she takes a look at what's in front of her. Look at this view... wow, this part of the cliff is so beautiful: all the trees, the mountain, all of that covered with snow now... I try to imagine all this in summer time-" Ellie is taken out of her thoughts.

"I hope that you're not planning on jumping, are you?" says a voice.

"Fuck! Joel, I told you not to follow me," says Ellie, then she turns her head and doesn't see anyone there. "Crap! Not this again, why is this happening? I already found the real you, so why are you still here?"

"I don't know- are you asking me?"

"Yes!... this isn't supposed to be happening anymore, you- you were only in my mind," answers Ellie.

"Well, that just means that you still have some issues to resolve."

"Really!... fuck! That's just great, and what could those be?"

"I don't know, you're the one that's talking to an imaginary voice."

"Well, that's great, I thought that this was going to stop when I found the real Joel, and it's not."

"I can't help you with what is wrong with you, because you already know."

"Well, that's the problem: I don't know what's wrong with me," says Ellie while she looks at the snowy forest in front of her.

"Well, that's something that you need to find out, so maybe then you don't need me anymore."

"Well, that's going to be great, because if I continue with this, people are going to think that I'm crazy," says Ellie sarcastically.

"Well, if you don't want him to think that you're crazy, it's better for you if you go back before he comes here looking for you," says the voice, then silence follows.

When Ellie doesn't hear the voice anymore, she takes one last look at the view and gets up, then she walks back to the cabin.

(Next day in the afternoon)

Joel comes out of the basement. He's doing a food stock inventory; now that he's not alone in the cabin and the snow hasn't let him go out to hunt, he needs to ration the food. The winter seems to be longer this year, so the food is going to be scarce soon. He gets close to the window in the living room, and sees Ellie outside, cutting up some wood for the chimney. He doesn't like to see her spend too much time outside, but he knows that she needs some time alone, so Joel is giving her that.

They didn't talk much yesterday after she came back a few hours later, after the discussion. So now it's better if he distracts himself, and doesn't think too much of Ellie. He notices now how much Ellie has grown up - not only physically, but mentally, too. She doesn't look or act like the little girl he left behind anymore. In some ways, maybe he's going to miss that part a little now. He also can see the pain in her eyes, and he knows that much of that is his doing. After Joel finishes with the inventory, he walks to the kitchen and starts to peel some potatoes. Then he hears Ellie enter the cabin with some wood in her hands.

"Fuck!... it's very cold out there. What I wouldn't give for a hot shower right now," says Ellie as soon as she enters the room.

She goes close to the chimney and drops the wood on the floor, then she walks toward the little kitchen that is close to the living room. She sees Joel peeling some potatoes, and goes to sit at the little table, where Joel is.

"Do you need any help? I can do that while you start the other things," says Ellie, taking a potato in one hand and a kitchen knife in the other.

"Thank you for offering you help, that would be nice, and thank you for speaking to me again. I know that you're mad at me, and I know that I deserve that," Joel says without looking at her.

"Yeah, well, since we're going to be stuck here for a while, it's logical that I help."

"You don't need to do that. You've already helped me a lot, Ellie… you even saved my life… again. I just want to let you know that I didn't leave because you did something wrong. And I don't want you to think that I didn't love you, because I do, and I want you to know that," says Joel, looking at her.

"Joel, I don't want to talk about this right now. I just want to forget all this, but I can't. I'm trying to understand why you did all of this, and lied to me and left me… after everything we went through, you just went," says Ellie, trying not to look at him.

"I know that you're not going to forget all this, but we need to get to a point where at least we can be something together. I wish that I could give you a better explanation for what I did, but I don't have one. I just needed to go at that time, to protect you and all the people that live there."

"Yeah, you just decided to hurt me, because you wanted to protect me and the people of the town. The town that you don't even know completely, and save the people there!... yeah, you only talked to... how many, 10 people in there?" says Ellie, with some anger in her voice.

"That doesn't even matter right now. My brother and his wife make that town safe for people that want a new start, and I want that for you. I can't even believe how my stupid brother let you go out of town alone, after he promised that he was going to take care of you."

"Seriously!... You're going to blame your brother for breaking a promise? And besides, he didn't have much choice. I'm 18 now, and the town is not a prison. Besides, he didn't let me go alone - Dylan came with me," says Ellie, a little calmer now.

"Dylan? Are you serious? It ain't like I don't like the kid, but he's not ready to go outside, especially going so far away from the town. But he's not here with you… so what happened to him? Don't tell me that-"

"No! He's not dead, if that's what you're thinking. Well, at least not when I left him."

"What! You left him? Where? What happened?" asks Joel.

"He was with me for a few months, but he get wounded, so I know he can't come the rest of the way, so- wait a second, are you trying to change the conversation?" says Ellie, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"I just want to know what happened to him, and how the hell you got out of Jackson and found me here."

"Well, if you want to know why I left Jackson, it was because of you. You left me there, after all we did together... do you know how much I cried after you left? And what did you think was going to happen to me after Tommy told me what you did in Salt Lake City… unnn?"

"Ellie... I know that telling you how much I'm sorry for that ain't going to change anything. But hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do. But I needed to do something about this man that was looking for us, and I needed to do it alone."

"What man did you need to find- umm? Another Firefly group? You want to kill them all - do you know how crazy that is? Oh yeah, I know now what you've been doing for the past 2 years, and you think that that's going to change anything?"

"Ellie, I don't think you understand or know what I've had to do for the last 2 years. Also, you-"

"Joel, don't you think that I know you've been hunting Firefly groups? That that's why you left me?" says Ellie, getting angry again.

"You must understand that those people are dangerous. The man I was looking for is just a maniac. He's been hunting people like you to do who knows what, even though he's not a Firefly anymore. His own people don't want anything to do with him, and he's still looking for you, and I had to do something. Anyway, how do you know all that? Tommy told you about that, too?"

"Tommy didn't tell me anything about that. But maybe it's going to be better for all of us if I just go to them, so they can try to find a cure for the virus," says Ellie, looking at him.

"Don't say that, not even as a joke, Ellie. That man doesn't want to find any cure. This guy - the one I'm looking for - is responsible for the weapons that that psycho David's brother used to attack the town. He almost destroyed the town, and killed a lot of people there. So yeah, I came out here to hunt him down, and if Tommy didn't tell you, how did you know?"

"Well, you want to know how I knew? I found out about that the same way I found you here," says Ellie, standing up from the table.

"How?" asks Joel.

"Remember Bill? Well, he told me what you've been doing, and where to find you."

"Bill? That motherfucker, I told him not to tell anyone about me... fuck, after I helped him," says Joel, hitting the table with his fist.

"Don't get mad at him - he only helped me because he didn't have any choice. Do you know how much I lost for coming after you? I thought for a time that you were dead, or that you needed some help… You didn't even care what happened to me, even when I was having nightmares again... and you just left me because you want to kill a man?" says Ellie with some tears falling down from her eyes.

"Ellie!... I'm just-"

"Trying to protect me? Yeah, you've been saying that since we got to Jackson. I don't need you to protect me. I thought we were partners... that we protect each other. You said that you love me, and I thought that that was true. But now I can see that that was a lie too," says Ellie, trying not to cry in front of him.

"Ellie, I do love you, more than you think. I never lied about that," says Joel, standing up from the table too and starting to walk toward her.

"This isn't fair, Joel, why I have to lose all the people I care about, why all the people I know just abandon me… I just want to be with someone who loves me, and-" she stops when Joel comes to her and hugs her, and she starts to cry in his arms.

"Ellie, I'm so sorry for all of this. I just wanted to protect you, and didn't see the consequences of my actions. I can see now that I was wrong to leave. I just wanted so much to keep you safe that I didn't think about what all this was going to do to you," says Joel while he embraces her hard.

"Joel!... I came here to find you, because I love you, and all this time I've thought only of you. So why is it so hard and painful to be close to you now?" says Ellie, burying her face in Joel's chest while she continues to cry.

"Because I'm an asshole. I don't blame you for hating me; I deserve that. But I want you to know that I never stopped loving you. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, and I ended up doing that. I can see that now, and I'm really sorry for that," says Joel with some tears forming in his eyes.

Ellie just stays there in his arms, not knowing what to do or what to think. She's mad at him for going and leaving her in Jackson and not coming back for more than 2 years. He knew that the only thing she wanted was to be with him… that she finally found someone to love, and he left. So now that she found him, what's going to happen: can she forgive him? Do they go back to the way they were before? Does he really love her the same way she still loves him? She needs some answers to those questions… maybe in time she would have them, but for now, being in his arms again is all she needs.

"Joel?"

"Yes, kiddo!"

"There's something I forgot to tell you," says Ellie without separating her head from Joel's chest.

"What is it, kiddo? You can tell me anything. I want to fix all the stupid things I did."

"You're going to be an uncle!"

"WHAT!"